An accidental death. Sad, but a relief for me to hear now. “Did your grandfather ever talk about what happened?”
“About his time with her?” Erik shook his head. “Her death destroyed him. He never mentioned her without breaking down. So I never asked.”
“How many years did he have with her?”
“Almost twenty.”
“So she survived twenty solstices,” I said pointedly.
His response emerged on a frustrated growl. “That doesn’t change anything. You might not survive one.”
“Well, what about everyone else in your family?” I knew he didn’t have any siblings. “Aunts and uncles? Cousins? Are they cursed, too?”
“No.”
So Erik had never actually seen or heard a first-hand account of what happened, and he didn’t really know that hurting me was inevitable. That didn’t surprise me. It was hard to believe that such brutality could continue unchecked for over a thousand years in one family. Someone would avenge the women or protect them—a mother or father, sisters or brothers. If Erik hurt me, my family would come down on him like the fury of Hell. In a thousand years, surely other families would have done the same? If the Gulbrandrs were so terrible, they should have been wiped off the face of the earth by now.
But they hadn’t been. “There has to be some solution or my mother would have warned me away. So we’ll find it.”
“God, Olivia. You’re so damned practical and determined. I never had a chance.” His heavy sigh whispered across my cheek in a cold caress. “But practicality can’t stop this curse. Neither can determination. Do you think that we haven’t tried? For a thousand years, men stronger than me, smarter than me, braver than me. We all fell.”
Perhaps, but the practical side of me couldn’t give up. “You’re resisting it now,” I pointed out.
His diamond gaze locked on mine. “Barely.”
My eyes widened. How could that be true? He didn’t give a sign of it. When I’d first arrived, he’d seemed closer to the edge of control, shaking and feverish. Now he didn’t appear to be in pain, but as solid as stone. Definitely not on the verge of—oh, God.
All this time, I hadn’t looked away from his face. Now when I looked down, I was stunned to see the aggressive thrust of his cock behind denim, but his enormous arousal didn’t astonish me as much as his feet did. From his knees to the ground, two thick columns of ice cemented his legs in place.
“Your feet,” I gasped. “Did you do that to yourself?”
“Yes. The ice can’t stop me. But it helps me maintain control.”
Not just his legs, I realized. He’d fused his hands to the wall, too, surrounding me in a sculpture of flesh, ice, and stone.
This was crazy. “How close are you to losing it?”
“Close enough.” His voice roughened and a shiver raced over my skin. “It will only become worse. The astronomical solstice is two nights away. From now until then, only a miracle or a bullet will keep me off of you. And you’re a practical woman, Olivia. You know a bullet has a better chance.”
God, that was true. But I wouldn’t admit it. “Don’t rule a miracle out,” I said. “After all, it’s almost Christmas.”
A moment of silence fell between us, then a deep laugh rumbled from him. Erik shook his head, and as my own laugh burst into the frozen air between us, I realized that I couldn’t see his breath. He stilled when my hand lifted to his lips.
“Olivia—”
“Hush.” I interrupted his warning. “Just control yourself.”
“I am,” he gritted out—then went silent, his eyes closed and teeth clenched as my fingers traced the strong line of his jaw. Rough, unshaven.
Burning.
But his breath had been cold—though there wasn’t any at all now. “Breathe, Erik.”
His frigid exhalation crossed my fingertips…even though I could still feel the heat radiating from his skin. Cursed with a fever, yet freezing inside.
Beside my shoulders, the ice climbed farther up his arms.
I was pushing his control too far. Reluctantly, I pulled my hand back. “Is this ice and cold inside you from the curse, too? Or is this you?”
“It’s me.” His glittering eyes met mine again. “Mostly a man. Some frost giant. That’s the part I’m holding back.”
Frost giant? I suppose that explained his size. Though not absurdly tall, he was a big man—and I’d always liked that about him. I’d liked his large hands and broad shoulders, and I’d always assumed that he’d be big all over.
Unless he had a giant icicle in his jeans, he was big all over. But I didn’t let myself look down again. Touching him, having him so close was pushing my mind in a direction that it shouldn’t be going—and an erection didn’t mean anything. He was hard all over, so a hard dick didn’t necessarily mean he wanted me. It might just be something else he couldn’t control.
“So you’re holding the frost giant back. But you don’t know that you’ll hurt me if you let it out? You just worry that you will because you’re strong and you’ve never had this happen before.” I knew it was a fine line to draw, but his life lay on that line and it was worth examining. “But your grandmother survived the curse, didn’t she? So there’s a chance you won’t hurt me, and my choice is to take that risk or to kill you.”
“Your only choice is to kill me.”
I couldn’t accept that. I wouldn’t accept it.
He must have read that determination on my face. Shaking his head, he began roughly, “Olivia—”
“We’ll think of a plan,” I said. “Maybe I’ll end up shooting you. Maybe I won’t. But we have to try, all right?”
“No.” He ground out the denial through clenched teeth. “It’s too dangerous.”
“Dangerous? Jesus Christ. What do you think shooting you in cold blood will do to me? Do you think it wouldn’t completely fuck me up? Do you think the guilt wouldn’t destroy me and that I wouldn’t spend the rest of my life hating myself because I didn’t try harder?” My voice broke as I imagined watching the life drain from his eyes, then imagined trying to get through the rest of the day. And the next. And the next. “How can I bear knowing that I murdered you? Nothing you’ve done justifies it.”
Desolation swept across his features. “Not yet. But I will.”
“How do you know? My mother sees the future and even that isn’t inevitable. So I have to try. I have to. Now let’s go inside and talk about it…while you still can.”
Breathlessly, I waited for his answer. His gaze searched mine. He finally relented with a heavy sigh.
“Go in, then.”
Chapter Four
Despite agreeing to try, Erik didn’t immediately follow me into the house. One look back at him told me why. Shattered ice lay in heaps near his feet. It no longer encased his arms and legs, no longer helped him maintain control—and the effort showed. He stood with his head down and his hands braced against the gatehouse wall. The tendons in his neck stood out in stark relief against his blue skin, every muscle in his body straining.
Watching him, I couldn’t mistake the power of that curse. Despite his strength of will, Erik believed it would overpower him; I believed it now, too. But watching him told me more: how hard he’d fight to keep from hurting me when it did.
I had to trust in that. The only other choice would destroy us both. “Erik?”
As if in response to my voice, a shudder ripped through his big body and he rasped, “I need a minute, Olivia.”
To regain control. That would probably be easier if I was out of his sight, and a minute alone would do me good, too. I’d barely had a second to think since I’d seen the claw marks on my Jeep. I needed to put my thoughts in order and calm the chaotic emotions roiling inside me—and hopefully come up with a plan that would leave us both alive.
I had no idea what that plan would be.
Troubled, I ventured from the foyer into the great room, shrugging out of my coat and stripping off my hat. I left my vest on.
Though not cold enough to see my breath, the house was chilly. Luckily, wood had been stacked near the fireplace and kindling lay ready in the grate.
Sinking to my heels in front of the firebox, I fished a lighter from my bag, then recalled Erik’s fever when I’d first arrived. He’d been affected by the curse before he’d even seen me—and he’d probably kept the house cold on purpose. Compared to what he was going through, I could stand a little chill.
I replaced the lighter and glanced up. A walnut beam served as a mantel shelf. Over it, the iron brackets that held Erik’s spear stood empty. Soon Erik would use that weapon. He’d either kill the brothers in the woods or be killed—and the Hounds believed that whatever Erik did to me on the solstice would make him welcome death.
I couldn’t bear to let him die. So how was I going to stop it?
A sofa faced the fireplace. Stripping off my gloves, I sank onto a cushion and pushed my fingers into my hair. My brain seemed to work best in this position. But my thoughts weren’t leading toward a solution—only more heartache and dread.
The Hounds were wrong. Erik wouldn’t wait until the solstice; he already sought death. Despite his wish, I couldn’t help him find it. He hadn’t hurt me yet, and—
My brain ground to a halt. Painful emotion tore at my chest as realization hit me.
Erik had hurt me. While walking with me to my Jeep, he’d eviscerated me with words. But he shouldn’t have been able to. Not that deeply.
Unless I felt more for him than I’d been willing to admit.
His declaration rang through my mind again. I left to get away from you, Olivia. I can’t stand being around you. The memory formed a hollow echo inside my guts, the insistent ache of a wound that might never heal—but it shouldn’t have felt any worse than a slap. I’d been rejected by men before. It always stung; then I got over it.
I didn’t think I’d get over this. For a year and a half, I’d told myself that I was only attracted to him. But I couldn’t fool myself anymore—Erik had only been able to rip out part of my heart because I felt more than simple attraction.
“Olivia?”
I jerked my head up. Erik stood at the door, looking like himself again. No blue skin or claws. Just big and gorgeous and his intense gaze locked on mine. My stomach clenched at the sight of him, but instead of resenting it, I wondered how I’d never recognized what that reaction meant. Not just attraction, but excitement and hope that I’d always hastily quashed.
I didn’t suppress it now. And I couldn’t imagine the effort it had taken for him to rein in the curse and the frost giant within, but I could see it. His eyes burned feverishly blue again and his entire body had stiffened, as if warding away pain.
My gaze returned to his face. “How long? You’ll be okay until the solstice, right?”
“I don’t know. It might hit me in an hour. It might take another day.”
“When did it hit last year?”
“The night of the solstice. But you weren’t this close to me then. It’s already worse. To be safe, you need to do it soon.”
Kill him? Stricken, I shook my head. “You can’t ask this of me.”
“It’s too much to ask of anyone.” His voice sounded as if sandpaper lined his throat. “But you have to do it.”
Shoot him? Resolve firmed my response. “I can’t. Not when you haven’t done anything to me yet. Not when a curse is forcing you to do it.”
“That’s bullshit. You can’t blame a rabid dog for his disease, but you’d still put him down before he bites someone.”
“You’re not a dog, Erik.”
“But I’m not completely human, either.” His head lifted. Blue tinged his skin again. “You’re a practical woman. You can do this.”
I gave a wild laugh, shaking my head. No, I wasn’t practical. I couldn’t be in regards to him.
His tone hardened. “Do you think nothing will happen because your mother didn’t warn you? You don’t have phone reception here. How do you know she hasn’t left another message telling you to run for your life?”
I couldn’t know. But my mother wasn’t the only reason why I didn’t think he’d hurt me. His insistence that I kill him said he’d shield me from harm instead.
“We’ll work out a fix,” I said. “So just help me out, okay?”
Though his jaw tightened again as if he wanted to argue, Erik gave a small nod.
“We’ve got two problems: the Hounds and the curse. But we’ve got two days. So as long as you keep control until the night of the— No, shut up.” I stopped him when I saw that he was going to interrupt. “You are going to keep control until then. You don’t have another choice.”
I don’t know if Erik nodded again just to placate me or if he really believed he could. It didn’t matter. He would do it.
“All right,” I continued. “Problem one are the Hounds. I’m safe from them in here, right?”
“Right.”
“But I’m not safe from you. So even though you don’t know for certain that you’ll hurt me, there’s zero chance that I’ll reach Day Three without something happening.”
His voice roughened. “Right. Unless you shoot me.”
“Don’t start that again,” I warned him.
He held my gaze—no backing down.
So frost giants were stubborn assholes. Fine. I was stubborn, too. “If I’ll be safe here, then what if you go? If you leave right now and just go as far as you can? If you keep control until the night of the twenty-first, and only lose it for a few hours, maybe you’ll come to your senses again before you make it back. ”
Erik was already shaking his head. “I wouldn’t get far. The curse will pull me back to you. And if I lose control when I’m out there, I’ll come through these walls—giving the Hounds a way in.”
That would suck for us both. “So the first priority has to be getting rid of the Hounds. Because I’ll be okay here tonight, maybe even tomorrow night, but by the night of the twenty-first I need to be gone.”
“That’s too late. It won’t matter by then—you can’t get far enough.”
Come on. “Even if I drive out of here? You’re faster than your truck?”
“Yes.”
Shit. “I guess that might not be an option anyway. There’s going to be a lot more snow coming down soon and we can’t call a plow.”
“A plow doesn’t matter,” he said. “I can clear the driveway.”
Remembering how he’d skimmed over the snow earlier, something told me that he wouldn’t be clearing it with a snowblower or a shovel. “How far do I need to be?”
“Australia.” He didn’t sound as if he was kidding.
“A flight?”
Erik was quiet for a long moment, and this time when he nodded, I didn’t think it was just to placate me. Instead a bit of hope had lightened the bleak resignation clouding his face.
“So frost giants can’t fly,” I said.
A quick smile broke through. “No.”
That was the answer, then. I just had to—oh, shit. It was the freaking holidays. And international travel might be out if the only open flights went somewhere that required getting a visa in advance. “What if I only make it to Houston or New York? Is that far enough? What if I just hop around the country?”
Though that wouldn’t be easy, either. Not with the weather and holiday travel mucking up everything. Plus, the snowstorm rolling in over Denver might shut down the airport entirely.
The hope seeping from his expression told me the answer. “You have to land. And if there were delays—”
“Okay,” I said, nixing that idea. No way would a dead end stop me, though. I’d turn around and try again. “If there’s zero chance of getting to Day Three here, then even a one-percent chance somewhere else is better. So what happens if I drive out of here now? Maybe I’ll get far enough. Maybe you won’t find me. So is that an option? The Hounds are here for you, not for me. Would they let me go through?”
His eyes paled to diamond. “No. They�
�ve already destroyed your Jeep. They’re here for revenge and they’ll use you to get to me.”
Yeah, that was what I figured. The brothers would wreck the truck, capture me, and both Erik and I would be in a worse position than we were now.
“But I could go with you,” Erik continued slowly. “Draw them out. When they come after us, when they reveal themselves, I stop them—and you keep driving.”
That idea started out better than it finished. “Drive on while you’re fighting? Just leave you?”
“Yes.”
“What if—”
“You drive on.”
God damn it. “But what if—”
“No!” The sudden snap of sharpened teeth made my heart jump. His fists clenched in his jeans and he stared at me, eyes blazing blue again. “There are two possible outcomes. One is that I win—then you need to get away from me. One is that I lose—then you need to get away from the Hounds. Either way, you keep driving.”
“Three!” I snapped back. “Three possible outcomes. And the third is that while you’re fighting the others, one of the brothers comes after me anyway. Are you sure you can take all three Hounds at once without losing one?”
He wasn’t sure. I could see it in the way he suddenly ripped his hands through his hair in frustration, but also in the way he didn’t respond. He was quiet, his jaw tight—reconsidering our options.
“I’ll have to kill at least one of them first,” he finally said. Determination hardened his gaze. “But better if I take out two before we try to go. Tonight and tomorrow, I’ll hunt them down. Then you’ll take my truck. If any Hounds are left, we’ll draw them out.”
All right. Though far from a perfect plan, at least it was better.
“But if I can’t hold out,” he added softly, “if I come after you, you have to shoot me in the head. Anywhere else won’t matter. I’ll show you.”
* * *
Erik continued into the kitchen. Wary—wondering exactly how he would show me—I followed him. Like the great room, the kitchen appeared deceptively bright and warm, considering how few windows allowed in the light. It was also just as big, flowing past a rustic seating area and into an open, formal dining room that lay near the front of the house.
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