“I like it,” I said. “But I don’t like anything else about it. Did he…do anything to you? Hurt you?” My blood started to simmer in my veins as I pictured various scenarios. Charlotte hadn’t been mine in years, but the idea of some other guy treating her bad made me want to crack his face open. Even though I didn’t know what his face looked like.
She shook her head, but she also wrapped her arms protectively over her chest. “No. But he just started to get weird towards the end—he was jealous, he was acting paranoid. And when I told him I wanted to take a break, he flipped out.”
“And he’s still calling you, and saying he wants to see you,” I said.
“Yeah. That pretty much sums it up.”
I felt the muscle in my jaw pop. “I don’t like that.”
She shrugged. “There’s nothing to like about it.”
“I’m not going to let him do anything to you,” I said. The words were out of my mouth before I could think them through.
“So not your problem, Sean.”
But what if I wanted it to be my problem?
“I’ll kick his ass,” I said. “Just saying.” And in that moment, I decided that’s what I was going to give myself for Christmas: I’d let myself open a can of whup-ass on Charlotte’s douche-y ex-boyfriend if the opportunity presented itself.
Then 2016 could really go out with a bang.
4
CHARLOTTE
“That’s really sweet, but I can take care of myself.” But as I watched Sean’s biceps popping underneath his thermal shirt, I had to admit that I was a little thrilled that he wanted to fight Chris for me.
Because that was just so hot.
Shut it, I mentally warned myself. The last thing I needed to do was drag Sean into my problems. He owed me nothing—worse than that, he owed me less than nothing, because I’d seriously been an asshole to him when we were younger. I was done with being someone who took and took and gave nothing in return.
And the poor guy’s wife had cheated on him. Huh. Maybe I should go find her and beat her up, just to even things out...
I willed myself to stop thinking such things. I really needed to get my Christmas spirit in order. Stop referring to people as douche-related items. Stop thinking about getting into a catfight for revenge purposes.
Even if the intended recipients TOTALLY deserved it…
Sean was setting out our food and he turned on a Christmas music station. “It’s really good to see you,” I said, sitting down across from him. “I’m sorry I just went off about…things. It’s just—”
“—Really easy to talk to you,” Sean finished my sentence. “I feel the same way. I shouldn’t be threatening to beat up your ex, but it just seems so”—
“—Like a thing you would do,” I finished for him, and smiled. “You always were a good guy. You always looked out for me. Sorry I was such a…jerk. Before. When I left.” I hadn’t intended on talking about before, but the words just tumbled out of my mouth. My stomach felt hot as I watched his face, waiting for a reaction.
Sean’s eyes sparkled at me from across the table. “We were kids. And if I never told you before, I forgive you.”
I just realized that until right then, I’d never said I was sorry. “Thank you. And we’re doing this way backwards, and ten years later, but I am sorry. I wasn’t ready to be in a serious relationship. I was petrified.”
“I know.” Sean nodded and I wished vaguely that I could reach out and touch him the way I used to, run my hands across his slight-scruff. “I should never have pushed you like I did. I knew you weren’t ready. I was being selfish.”
I shook my head. “You weren’t being selfish—you were just more mature than I was. I don’ think I finished adolescence until…” I pushed the food around on my plate. “Until six months ago when my Dad died. And since I opened my own business. So it’s taken me another whole decade since I last saw you to grow up.” I gave him a rueful smile.
“Well, welcome to being an adult. It can suck sometimes, but at least you can stay up late and you can’t actually get grounded.” He paused for a beat. “Do you like running the bakery?” I could tell he was trying to steer the conversation back toward safer territory, and I appreciated the hell out of it.
“I love it. It’s really hard running a small business, because you’re responsible for everything—ordering supplies, paying vendors, the taxes, the baking, the customer relationships—but I wouldn’t want it any other way. Because it’s my baby, and I wouldn’t trust anybody else to care about it the way that Riley and I do.”
Sean beamed at me. “That’s awesome. I hope it’s a huge success.”
“I just want to be able to do it for the rest of my life. I can’t imagine liking anything else better.” I smiled back at him, the wine and his support making me feel warm. “What about you? Who is this billionaire I hear you’re working for?”
“It’s Liberty’s husband, John. He runs a private security company.” Sean jerked his thumb toward the window. “That’s their house over there. I’ve worked with John’s company for years.”
“Wow. That’s some house, if you can even call it that.” I looked at the stately mansion further down the property and closer to the coast. “So you guys live together? Isn’t that unusual?”
“Maybe. But I lived here before, over in the barracks with the rest of the guys, and it just seemed way nicer to have my own place. My best friend did the same thing. He built a house on the property so he can be with his wife and kids when we’re not out on assignment, but he’s here if we need to pull a team together quickly.”
“So what is it you do, exactly?” Sean’s job sounded way more exciting than making pies, even though I seriously loved making pies.
“We do private security work. Sometimes for the government, sometimes for regular people. We find people who are missing, we protect people, we…just sort of do things. Things that law enforcement might not be able to do.”
“Is it dangerous?” I asked. I wasn’t sure why, but my heart was pounding in my chest.
He shrugged. “Sometimes. But we’re all professionals. We have each other’s backs.”
“Do you like it? I guess I always thought you’d end up fishing with your Dad…” Sean’s dad ran a commercial fishing business. He went out on the water even in the dead of winter, braving stormy seas and freezing winds. Sean had worked for him all through high school, and he’d been fishing when I’d left for school.
“I love my job.” Sean’s eyes sparkled. “Fishing is great, but it wasn’t for me. I ended up going to WPI. I got a degree in computer science. I use it when we have to investigate people remotely.”
“That sounds amazing.” Sean had always been smart. Still, I couldn’t believe that they boy I’d left ten years ago had turned into this amazing man. I hadn’t given him enough credit.
I’d never given him enough credit.
“So…” Sean’s eyes were still sparkling. “Why don’t you give me Mr. Douchepant’s info, and we’ll do a little digging? Make sure he hasn’t crossed any state lines?”
“You can do that?”
“Yeah.” Sean didn’t hesitate.
I cocked my head at him. “You’d do that for me?”
“Of course. And if he comes within ten feet of you, I’ll personally break his face. Now come on—let’s go sit on my couch, listen to Christmas music, fire up the laptop, and keep you safe.” He grinned at me and my stomach did a loop-de-loop.
Being safe had never sounded so…sexy.
SEAN
“So…” Charlotte was peering over my shoulder as I hacked into her ex-boyfriend’s accounts. “I feel like this is inappropriate. And illegal.”
“It’s definitely illegal. As for inappropriate, I dunno.” I absentmindedly petted Gypsy behind the ears. Charlotte had been devastated that he’d jumped right onto my couch, but I was happy to have him here. Because I liked him, and because it meant that Charlotte was here. And even though I’d warned m
yself that I shouldn’t let my guard down around her, apparently my guard had taken the night off. Being back with her was just like old times, except it was better, because we were both mature adults.
Who knew being a mature adult could be so sexy?
Chris, her ex, did not appear to be a mature adult. He’d racked up several thousand dollars’ worth of credit card debt over the last few months, mostly due to purchases at GameStop. “He’s a gamer?” I asked her. “Not that there’s anything wrong with that…”
“Yeah. And it’s fine, but not when you’re maxing out your credit cards to do it.”
“I don’t see any plane tickets or car rentals, so that’s good,” I said. “I’ll keep an eye on him, if that’s okay with you. Let me know if he gets in touch again.”
She smiled at me. “I guess it’s pretty nice to have a big, burly, helpful ex-boyfriend who works in security.”
“Who’re you calling big and burly?” I asked, but I felt myself flushing from the compliment.
“I think you know.” She stifled a yawn and looked at her watch. “Ugh, sorry I’m yawning. I have to go—we open at five a.m.”
“I can drive you,” I offered.
“I have my car. But thank you—for everything.” She patted my thigh and, as though I were still a crushed-out teenager, my skin felt hot where she’d touched me.
“Okay.” We stood up and walked out, and that was where things got awkward again. Do I kiss her on the cheek? Do I hug her? I wanted to do both, but—
“Thank you for inviting me over,” Charlotte said, pulling me in for a quick hug. “It was great to see you. It makes my heart happy that you’re doing so well.”
“Thanks.” My face pressed against her hair, and just for a precious second, I could smell her, soap and shampoo and vanilla, maybe from all the baking.
She pulled back and I walked her to her car, through the snow that was still lightly falling. “I forgot,” she said, handing me a white box from her passenger seat. “Cookies. And a cupcake for Liberty.”
“She’ll appreciate it.” I patted Gypsy one last time as he hopped onto his blanket in the trunk of the station wagon. “Well…bye.”
“Bye.” She smiled at me one last time, and then headed back down the drive.
And I just stood there, getting covered in snow, as I watched the lights from her car disappear into the darkness.
I don’t always fall hard for women, but when I do, I prefer them to be Charlotte.
Ugh. I would laugh, but it was true. It was true, and it had only ever gotten me in trouble.
5
CHARLOTTE
“So?” Riley asked.
“So what?” I made sure I sounded nonchalant.
“So how was your date, Charlotte?” my sister asked, throwing her hands up in exasperation.
“It wasn’t a date.” I made sure to keep my back to her while I made the pie crusts, lest she see the blush I could feel creeping up my neck. “We just had dinner together.”
“Was there wine?” she asked suspiciously.
“Yes—we had Italian food, for Christ’s sake! Of course we had wine!”
“Did you sit next to him on the couch and look at the Christmas tree?” she asked.
“Maybe,” I admitted.
“That’s totally a date.” Riley sounded triumphant.
“Stop.” I wiped my bangs out of my face and could feel the flour I’d gotten on my forehead. “Sean’s only been divorced for a few months. I don’t think he’s really ready to date. And then there’s me.”
“What about you?”
“I don’t know.” I shrugged, feeling miserable. I’d had fun with Sean last night. Truth be told, I hadn’t wanted to leave. Not that I’d wanted to get physical with him, but it was just so nice to talk to him. Before we’d dated in high school, we’d been friends. He’d been my best friend, actually. And then I’d gone and ruined the whole thing.
“Talk to me,” Riley said, her voice a warning, “or I’m telling Mom.”
“Bite your tongue,” I said, my voice a warning. “Here’s the thing. I had…fun with him. I can’t remember the last time I had fun.”
“Um…never?” Riley offered.
“Ha-ha.” I shot her a dirty look. “He’s still a great guy. And he looks great. And he’s normal.” Who’d have guessed that normal was the new sexy?
“And sexy,” Riley added.
“Yes. He’s hot.” I groaned. There was no denying Sean’s handsome face or all those bulging muscles.
“But you said the most important two things—he’s nice and he’s normal. Sexy is the frosting, girl.” I could hear the smile in her voice. “Sounds like we have a winner, ladies and gentlemen! Finally!”
“No. We don’t.” I turned and looked at her. “You can’t say things like that. It’s never going to happen with me and Sean.”
“And why the heck not?” Riley asked. She put her hands on her hips, looking as if she were ready for a fight, which knowing my sister, was exactly what she was gearing up for.
“Because I already ruined it. A long time ago.”
“You need to give yourself a break.” Her face softened. “You were just a kid. You didn’t know any better.” She went back to making frosting, pouring powdered sugar into the mixer.
“But he did.” I shook my head. “Sean knew better, and I threw it away.”
“What if he’s let all that go?” she asked. “What if he’s ready to move on?”
“I hope he’s ready.” I nodded.
“Then that settles it,” my sister said, sounding pleased with herself.
“No—he definitely needs to move on—but not with me, Ri. I can’t trust myself. I mess up everything. Like you and Mom said, ever since Sean, I’ve only dated jerks and losers. I need to get my head on straight, and I don’t ever want to hurt him again. I’m just getting my life back on track. So’s Sean. I need to let him go.” I looked out the window and noticed it was snowing again, heavier this time.
“Maybe it’s just the past you need to let go of,” Riley said.
“Maybe.” My voice sounded despondent to my own ears. I wanted to let go of everything I’d done wrong, especially with Sean, but I also needed to learn from my mistakes. As a result, I wasn’t done with my past yet. I was just lucky that Sean had forgiven me. At some point, maybe I could learn to forgive myself.
But not just yet.
SEAN
“I just want to stop in here,” I told Matthew.
He looked at the sign for Charley’s and raised his eyebrow. “I thought you said she already had a stalker.”
I groaned. “I’m not stalking her. I just want to see if she needs a ride home.”
“Fine. But going forward, you should probably dial it back a little.”
I glared at him, thoroughly irritated. “I thought you wanted me to move forward. Clean the slate.”
“Right. But that was last night. And it sounds like it went well,” Matthew said.
“It did.”
“So today, you gotta play it cool. You have to make her work for it, a little.” Matthew looked smug.
“You’ve been married since you were practically a baby,” I said. “What the hell do you know about playing it cool?”
“I’ve been reading Men’s Health,” he said, “they have all sorts of advice.”
“Well, I don’t need their advice—or yours.” I groaned. “I’m just being a gentleman. You can’t help me with that.”
“What’s that supposed to mean?” he called, as I headed down the sidewalk.
“It means you chew with your mouth open and you bought Meredith grill utensils for her birthday.”
“She loved them!”
“She said she loved them. See the difference?”
“No, I do not!” Matthew barked.
I just shook my head and headed into the bakery. Riley was boxing up pastries and Charlotte was mopping the floor. “Hey,” I said. “Just wanted to stop in to see if you neede
d a ride home in the snow.” I felt my ears burning, thinking about what Matthew had said. I hoped I wasn’t being too desperate showing up here less than twenty-four hours after our dinner.
“Hi!” Charlotte pushed a lock of hair behind her ear. “I have my car, so…” Her eyes brightened. “Actually, I was going to go for a run after work. Did you go yet?”
“No,” I lied. I’d run seven miles that morning, but I suddenly felt like I needed more mileage.
“Want to meet in the park in a half hour?”
“I’d love to. By the way, hi Riley. Nice to see you.”
Charlotte’s older sister grinned at me. “It’s nice to see you too, Sean. You’re looking good!”
“Riley!” Charlotte hissed.
Riley giggled as I held up my hands. “Don’t object on my account,” I said. “You’re looking good too, Riley. See you in a few, Char.”
She nodded at me and I noticed that she was blushing. Which for some reason made me want to do a fist pump as I headed back outside to the jeep through the falling snow.
“So?” Matthew asked, throwing the car into drive.
“So…we’re going for a run.”
Matthew had run with me earlier. His body started shaking with silent laughter. “You just couldn’t say no, huh?”
I started to laugh, too. “Busted. Let’s hope she only wants to do three miles. Otherwise, I’m dead.”
Five miles later, I could barely lift my thighs as we headed up the hill that led back to the park.
“Am I going too fast?” Charlotte asked, in between puffs of breath. “I kind of thought you were going to kick my ass, but you’re dragging.”
“I’m. Fine.” The words came out in between pants.
She raised an eyebrow at me but didn’t say anything else. Thank goodness for Gypsy, who was currently pulling me up the hill as I held onto his leash for dear life.
Home for the Holidays: A Contemporary Romance Anthology Page 27