“Why?” she asks curiously, not taking her brown eyes off him.
Thinking Rake would want me to answer, I’m about to open my mouth when he cuts me off.
“Because I needed a place to stay, and your mom was kind enough to offer,” he says, flashing me an amused glance.
“My mom is very nice,” Cara says, nodding her head. “I’m happy you’re here, Adam.”
I wait for him to tell her not to call him that, but he doesn’t.
“Thank you, Cara,” he says, eyes softening. “You hang out with that boy a lot, don’t you?”
Cara’s face lights up. “Rhett? Yeah, he’s my best friend.”
Rake nods his head, looking contemplative. What’s going on in that mind of his?
“Can I get you a drink, Adam?” my daughter offers.
Rake turns his head to me then and chuckles. “I’d love that, Cara. Thank you.” Cara gets up and heads into the kitchen.
“Fuckin’ hell, Bailey,” he mutters under his breath.
“What?” I ask, wondering what I’m missing.
He closes the pizza box and turns his body to face me. “In high school. I remember one day we went out for dinner at a diner and these kids were being little shits. You turned to me and said that when you had kids, they were going to be well-mannered and polite, not bratty, spoiled, and ungrateful.”
I remember that day. I’d actually said I was going to make sure that our kids weren’t like that, but things obviously didn’t go according to plan.
“She’s a good kid,” I say. “Best thing to happen to me.”
“She’s amazing,” he says sincerely, watching her pour him some soda in the kitchen. “Reminds me of Clover a little bit, without the attitude. You’re a great mother, Bailey. Then again, I always knew you’d be.”
I try to swallow the sudden lump in my throat. “Th-thanks.”
“You never speak about her father.”
My eyes widen. “There isn’t much to tell. His name is Wade. When I told him I was pregnant, he wanted nothing to do with her. I haven’t seen him since then, nor do I want to, but I think it’s for the best. I wasn’t in a good place then; I was destructive, and the men I chose at the time reflected that.”
His gaze hardens as he mutters, “All you have to do is give me his full name.”
And then what? He’d hurt him? I’m about to ask what exactly he’d do to him when Cara comes back to the table with two cups. She hands the first to me and the second to Rake.
“Thank you,” he tells her, taking a sip.
“You’re welcome,” she says, grinning. “I’ll go and pour mine now.”
She leaves us again and Rake and I share a look.
“You handled everything well today,” he murmurs, playing with his lip ring with his teeth.
“I was scared shitless,” I say softly. “I’m glad it seemed like I held it all together.”
“Whoever dared to touch you will pay, you know that, right?” he states, steel in his tone. “They fucked up when they decided to bring you into this.”
“I’m a little worried,” I decide to admit to him. “What if they come after Cara? I can’t put her in any danger.”
“I won’t let anything happen to either of you—you can trust me on that, okay? You don’t even need to worry; your daughter will always be protected.”
I nod, believing his words. The thing is, things don’t always turn out how you want them to and although I can hear the determination in his voice to keep us safe, he can’t really promise something like that when fate could have other plans.
“Mom, can we all watch a movie after this?” Cara asks, sitting down with her own pink cup. I look away from Rake and I notice soda stains on her white T-shirt, which means she definitely spilled while pouring, but I ignore them, knowing that she likes to be independent.
“It’s a school night,” I remind her. “Bath time and bed for you.”
She looks up at Rake then, giving him her best puppy-dog eyes.
Rake chuckles and touches her nose with his index finger. “I’m afraid your mom is the boss, Cara.”
Cara pouts. “Okay. Can I have a bubble bath?”
I nod. “Yes, that’s fine. Go and get undressed and I’ll come fill up the tub.”
She walks off as we both watch her.
“I’ll clean up,” Rake announces. “You sort the angel.”
“Angel?” I ask, raising a brow.
He shrugs and grins. “They call Clover Princess, and I think Angel is fitting for Cara.”
I shake my head and smile at him. “I think you might be right.”
“Look at us,” he says a little gruffly, glancing around the room before looking at me. “All getting along and shit.”
“I think if we stay in the present, we’ll get along fine,” I admit, getting up from my seat. “It’s when we bring up the past . . . I don’t think either of us wants to go back there. And both for different reasons.”
He looks away. “Yeah, I’ll just . . . clean up. Where am I sleeping?”
“I can sleep with Cara and you can have my bed,” I suggest. There are only two rooms with beds in the house—the third I’d turned into a playroom. “She has a queen bed in her room, so it’s fine.”
“I’m not taking your bed,” Rake says, looking offended. “The couch is fine for me.”
“Don’t be ridiculous,” I say, lifting my hand up. “Both the beds are queens; there’s no reason I can’t share with my daughter.”
Rake stands up and pushes his chair in. “Where are your blankets? I’ll set up the couch.”
I throw my hands in the air. “You’re not sleeping on the couch.”
“Pretty sure I am,” he replies instantly, completely calm.
“You’re still stubborn, I see. And irritating!” I snap. “And difficult.”
“And you still like to fight just for the sake of fighting. Still turns you on, does it?” he asks, gaze flickering with amusement . . . and something else. Something I’m going to pretend I didn’t see.
I clear my throat. I did used to fight with him for the sake of fighting—and for the makeup sex. But also just because I thought it added a little spice to our relationship. What can I say? I was a stupid teenager. And yet, the pull to start an argument with him is still there. Yeah, the last thing I need to do is fall into old habits.
“I’m going to get Cara into her bath,” I announce.
I storm to the bathroom, muttering under my breath the whole way.
Just how long is he staying here again? Having him in my space, and in my life, is just reminding me of the what-ifs.
I don’t need to be thinking about those.
* * *
The next night I make pork chops.
Rake’s favorite. I don’t ask myself why I do this; I just do it.
When he sees what I’ve made, he grins and kisses me on the top of my head. “It looks fuckin’ delicious,” he says, rubbing his hands together. “And I know it’s going to taste even better.”
I tell my heart to harden, that it has no right to be jumping in my throat.
“We’ll see,” I say, trying to act unaffected by his close proximity.
“We will,” he says, studying me. I look away and find something to do to keep myself busy so I don’t have to stand there and feel the tension radiating between us.
I stir the rice.
He pushes my hair off my neck, and says, “You look beautiful today.”
Then he leaves the room.
And I finally allow myself to breathe.
* * *
I walk into the kitchen half-asleep the next morning and put some water on to boil.
“Good morning,” comes a deep voice behind me, making me jump.
Hand on my chest, I turn around and face him. “Holy crap! You scared me.”
“Sleep well?” he asks, but I can’t reply because I’m too busy taking in his bare chest.
Sweet baby Jesus.
The
most defined set of abs I’ve ever seen in real life. A six-pack. He has a six-pack. I mean, he always was toned and muscular, but now . . .
Fuck me dead.
He’s not too bulky, still lean, but so very defined. My fingers ache to trace each ripple. My tongue wants to do the same.
He’s covered in tattoos, and I’d like to know the story behind each one.
Wow.
It’s safe to say he’s just flawless, at least on the outside.
“Bailey,” I hear him say, breaking me out of the trance that is Rake’s magnificent body.
“Uhhh, yeah?” I mumble, still fixated on his smooth skin.
“Bailey,” he repeats, more stern this time, but when I lift my gaze to his, his eyes are filled with humor and heat.
“You’ve been staring at me in silence for like five minutes straight,” he lets me know.
“Oh” is all I can manage to say. “That’s nice.”
And I’m a teacher.
I still can’t manage to turn my gaze from him.
“You’ve . . . grown,” I say, embarrassing myself further. I point to his abs. “Those are nice.”
He smiles slowly. Smugly. His heavy eyes flashing with various emotions I can’t decipher.
“Glad you approve,” he rumbles, returning the favor by taking a slow perusal of me.
I swallow hard and turn away from a body that should be on book covers, distracting myself by grabbing two mugs and placing them on the table.
“So you work out a lot then,” I blurt out, when he doesn’t say anything.
I hear him chuckle behind me, but I really don’t want to face him right now. I can actually feel the heat rising to my cheeks. You’d think I’d never been around a shirtless man before. I had, just none who looked like that. But it was more than that, because it was him. He could have gained twenty pounds and I’d still be attracted to him.
“Yeah, I guess you can say that,” he says, then steps closer to my back. So close I can feel the heat from his chest. “You look good too, Bailey.”
I think of me, one size bigger than I used to be, with stretch marks and cellulite, and have to disagree. I mean, I’m not unattractive or anything, I’m just different than what I was. I’d had a child, and I had the body of a woman who’d had one.
“Um. Thanks,” I say quietly, avoiding his gaze. I ignore the thrill that fills me at him thinking so. Why did it matter if he thought I was attractive or not?
“You’re a beautiful woman,” he continues, and I turn around and look him right in the eye.
“Rake—”
I stop breathing as he reaches out to cup my cheek with his palm. The feel of his hand on me has me wanting to both jump in his arms and run away from him at the same time.
“I’m going to fry Cara some eggs for breakfast, would you like some?” I ask, needing to break the tension between us.
“Love some,” he replies, stepping away from me, allowing me to breathe easier. “I’m going to take a shower.”
“Okay,” I say, clutching the edge of the table with both my hands.
I hold my breath until he leaves.
I should have known how it would be being in such a close space with him, but I didn’t realize just how bad it would be.
Even after everything that happened.
The bitterness I felt toward him. The anger. Pain.
Through all that, we still have something, a connection, tethering us together.
I don’t like it. No, I hate it.
How can he still turn me on so much after all these years? I thought I hated him, but I don’t. He walked out on me when I needed him the most. He left me in my darkest hour.
How can you forgive someone for that?
The truth is that you can’t. I might have the darkness buried for now, but it will come to light eventually. It always does.
And then, it will destroy us both once more.
FOURTEEN
HE’S leaning against his four-wheel drive, waiting for me as I walk through the school parking lot, my black pumps clicking on the asphalt with each step. I try to hide my amused grin but fail, because flanking Rake are Cara and Rhett, both craning their necks to look up at the imposing man. He doesn’t look uncomfortable though—no, he looks in control. As I get closer I can hear laughter from the two children, and I try to ignore the pain in my chest at seeing what once upon a time could have been my future.
“Sorry I’m a little late,” I tell them, leaning down to kiss Cara on her cheek and then doing the same to Rhett.
I look up at Rake. “Thanks for getting them from their classes.”
“No problem,” he says, opening the door for the kids to get in the car and then opening the passenger-side door for me.
“Umm, thanks,” I mumble, sliding into the car and wondering how we went from hating the sight of each other to him opening doors for me.
“You want to stop anywhere on the way?” he asks as he pulls onto the main road.
I look into the backseat at the two eager faces staring at me with hopeful eyes. “What do you guys want?”
“Ice cream!” Cara shouts, while Rhett says, “Burgers!”
“Okay.” I grin, turning around and facing Rake. “Maybe we could stop somewhere that has burgers and ice cream. That diner maybe?”
“Okay.”
“So,” I start. “Just how long is this going to go on for?”
“As long as it takes,” he replies simply.
“You don’t think this is a little . . . awkward?” I ask, checking to see if the kids are listening, but they’re engrossed in Rhett’s tablet.
“I don’t think it’s awkward at all.”
“It’s just weird how things have turned out, you know? At first, with what happened at Rift that first night, then . . . ? I don’t know. . . .” I trail off, looking straight ahead.
“Stop overthinking everything, Bailey, and just go with it,” he says, turning up the radio a little bit. “I didn’t think you’d ever be back in my life, but you are, so now we deal. Whatever happens, happens.”
It isn’t as simple as he’s making it out to be, but I don’t bother pointing that out.
I guess I’ll just have to “go with it.”
Living with my high school sweetheart.
Who broke my heart.
Wonderful.
* * *
“Every time I start thinking highly of you, you keep talking,” I hear Tia tell Rake in the kitchen.
Rake chuckles, opening the oven and peering inside. “I’m just honest. It’s a trait that’s hard to find nowadays.”
“You told me that the guy I’m going on another date with isn’t into me,” she says, hands on her hips. “You don’t even know him!”
Rake closes the oven and leans back against the countertop. “One, he didn’t bother coming to the door when he picked you up, nor did he open the car door for you. I was watching. Two, you yourself say that he hardly messages you, and three, you haven’t seen him in a few days, so has he even called you? You fucked him on the first night, didn’t you?”
There was no judgment in his voice, just curiosity.
Tia groans and covers her face with her hands. “I didn’t fuck him. I might have given him . . . a little something though.”
Rake raises an eyebrow. “Head on the first date?”
“No,” Tia snaps. “I kind of liked this one, so I was hoping we’d go on a few more dates before we slept together. I was trying a new approach.”
Rake tries to keep his face straight, but he fails, and starts laughing, holding his stomach. “A blow job on the first date is a new approach? Fuckin’ hell woman, make the guy work for it or he won’t value it.”
“I said I didn’t give him head! We just kissed! Okay, Dr. Phil,” she says, her tone more sarcastic than I’ve ever heard it. “You’ve fucked half the female population. But what do you know about keeping a woman?”
I don’t miss the way Rake’s eyes flash at that comment
before he masks it. “I don’t want to keep a woman. But they all want to keep me, so I must be doing something right.”
Tia sighs and gives in. “Okay, what do I do?”
I walk into the room and sit down at the dining table. “I’d like to hear this advice too.”
Rake’s mouth tightens. “I’ll have to tell you some other time.”
“I’m just going to tell Bailey anyway,” Tia mutters. “What? Afraid she’ll use your advice to land a new man?”
Rake scowls at my best friend. “I take it back, no man will put up with a woman with your mouth.”
Smirking, I go to the oven to check on my brownies.
“Are they ready?” Rake asks from behind me.
I nod and pull the tray out with the oven mitts on. “Yeah, they look good.”
“They smell fuckin’ good.” He groans, the sound making me want to do the same.
“I’ll go tell the kids dessert is ready,” Tia says, exiting the room with haste.
“You had to pick her for your best friend, didn’t you?” Rake says, sighing dramatically.
I hide my grin. “She’s my neighbor. Fate chose her for me.”
I take the brownies out of the tray and onto a plate. Rake stands a little too close behind me for my liking, and when he speaks, his breath is warm and sweet on my neck. “You smell nice.”
I clear my throat. “Thanks, it’s uhhh, a body-mist thing I use.”
“Whatever it is, it’s good,” he rumbles into my ear. “It makes me hungry; it’s delicious.”
I edge away from him and take a few steps away. “Well. Brownies are ready; I’ll ice them when they cool down.”
“I can do it,” he offers, licking his lips. My eyes zoom in on his lip ring.
“When did you get that done?” I find myself asking.
He touches it with his index finger. “I was about twenty, I think. I got my eyebrow first, then the lip.”
“Why?” I ask him, our eyes connecting.
He stills, studying me, then finally shrugs. “I was looking for distractions, I guess, and I used any I could come across.”
I don’t ask him to explain further. “I like them.”
He nods, eyes now roaming down my body. “Good, I like them too.”
He is lingering on my breasts, which are bigger than the last time he saw them.
Rake's Redemption (Wind Dragons Motorcycle Club) Page 10