“Hey, Alan, how is thee?” he asked as the two men greeted one another warmly.
“I’m much better, Andrew, This is Sheila.” Alan added, bringing her forward with a gentle hand. Sheila suddenly felt shy in the presence of Andrew. She noticed that he looked like an older version of Paul, the same tall figure, but gray hair and a more lined face.
“Sheila, welcome to Fair Hill and to our farm.” He said taking her hand as if he had known her for years.
“We wonder if we could spend some time up here, Andrew. Sheila needs a quiet place to rest and recover.” Alan explained.
“Of course thee can.” Andrew said with his warm smile. “Come on in, and we’ll get thee settled in.”
Amy was in the kitchen, doing her usual morning baking and greeted them both with hugs and kind words.
“They would like to stay with us for a while, Amy,” Andrew told her quietly.
“All right, I’ll help thee both get settled.” Amy said, putting aside her work and washing her hands.
She led them upstairs and stopped at the top, facing both of them.
“Does thee need two rooms or one?” she asked straightforwardly.
“We only need one,” Sheila found herself answering, and Amy’s smile was encouraging.
“That’s good. I’ll show thee.” She took them to a large sunny room, with a view of the apple orchard behind the house.
“This will be perfect,” Sheila agreed, looking out at the trees. “Thank you.”
“Thee is very welcome. Does thee need help unpacking?” Amy asked from the doorway.
“No, thank you, I think we can manage.” Sheila replied, and there was no trace of her usual imperious tone.
Amy left them to their work, and went back to her bread making.
“She’s a very sweet person,” Sheila commented, hanging up her things in the wardrobe beside Alan’s.
“Yes, and it’s real. Nothing put on about any of the folks up here.” Alan agreed. “Are you sure you are going to be comfortable with both of us here?” he asked quietly.
“No, but I want to try.” she said hesitantly.
“All right, if you are not, just tell me, and I’ll fix it.” He told her gently. She promised she would, and when they were finished, they returned to the kitchen where Amy was waiting for her bread to rise.
“Andrew’s outside somewhere,” she said as they entered and took chairs at the kitchen table.
“I’m afraid I’m not much help,” Sheila said watching Amy work.
“Thee is good company though, I’m sure.” Amy said.
“Did Barbara help you when she was here?” Sheila asked after a silence.
“Yes, she was very helpful and a wonderful friend to our Lisbeth. She is like a daughter to us even now.” Amy answered. “She has grown into a fine woman. Thee should be proud of her.”
“I’m sure she has.” Sheila agreed. “I never knew her very well.”
“Thee can change that.” Amy said gently. “She knows about thy illness, and is praying for thee. I am sure that if thee wrote to her, she would answer thee back.”
Sheila said she was not sure about that, and Amy let the subject drop.
When Amy had finished her baking and had started the noonday meal, she gave Sheila a tour of the house.
“It’s so big for just the two of you,” Sheila commented when they had finished and returned to the kitchen.
“Yes, but it used to be full. Andrew is the youngest of twelve children. His parents had eleven sons and one daughter. We only had three, but the house was already here.”
Sheila thought of her estate and the huge almost empty house in which she was born and raised.
“You have a very hospitable home,” she observed. “It feels warm and welcoming.”
“I’m glad thee feels that way. Thee is very welcome here.”
“I don’t understand that attitude.” Sheila admitted. “Molly and Doctor Wilson said that I would be welcome here, but I never believed them.”
“Well, now thee knows.” Amy said, seating herself at the table near Sheila.
“So how can I be welcome here after all I’ve done?” Sheila asked after a pause.
.”First, that was in the past. We do not hold grudges here. We forgive thee. Paul and Barbara do not hold anything against thee either. They are happy and they want the same for thee.”
“I’m not sure I can remember being happy.” Sheila admitted.
.”Thee will be able to change that now.” Amy assured her. “Once thee regains thy health, thee will be able to fix that.”
She knew Sheila was still doubtful so she said no more, but she hoped the seeds were planted.
Sheila spent part of the afternoon of that day sitting outside on a swing, enjoying the soft breeze that gently blew her hair. She left her place after an hour or so and reentered the house, stopping in the living room to look at the bookshelves there. Suddenly, she wanted something to read. She found a Bible and a few other books, but nothing looked interesting until she found a sketchbook tucked away among the books and drew it out to look at its pages.
On the first page was a family tree, starting with Joshua Becker’s parents who had come from Germany in the early 1800s. Then she saw Joshua, Rebekah, and their 12 children. Then there were Andrew, Amy, and their three children. She could see that all three of them were married now and that two of them had children of their own. She found herself wiping tears from her eyes, wishing that this time of emotional fragility and easy tears would pass. She sat down on a sofa nearby to look at the rest of the sketches contained in the book. Some were of Andrew and his family growing up, and there were a few that Andrew had done while he was working as a nurse in the Civil War. These were somewhat disturbing, so she flipped through them quickly, barely pausing to look at them. Then there were others of Andrew and Amy and their children growing up. Toward the end, a few were not drawn by Andrew, but by Paul. They were done at Fair Hill too, but showed not only family but friends and people of the meeting. She recognized Molly among the pages and even saw Alan in a few. The last page was a picture of Paul and Barbara that Andrew had drawn on their wedding day. Barbara was holding a small child, and Sheila knew from Alan’s stories that she was the one they had adopted. She wondered what it would be like to be part of a family like this, where everyone loved and respected one another, and wanted the best for each other. She had never known what that was like except from Alan, and she realized now, that She had not known what to do with it. She wondered if now things would change that much for them. She decided she dared not hope for that, as things she hoped for seldom became reality. She put the book away, and went to the kitchen again, to see who might be about. She found Andrew and Alan at the table, enjoying some hot tea.
“I don’t mean to interrupt you,” she said standing in the doorway, about to leave again.
.”Thee is not interrupting. Come and join us.” Andrew said. “Would thee like some tea?”
“Yes, it does sound good.” she took a chair beside Alan and Andrew got a cup and put it before her, then added the teapot and sugar and cream. She poured her tea and drank it slowly, warmed as much by the welcome as the tea.
“We were just talking about you,” Alan said pouring himself another cup. “I hope you are happy to be here.”
“I am. I just saw the sketchbook that is on the bookshelf in the living room,” She said after a pause. “Did you draw the earlier pictures?” She asked, looking at Andrew.
.”Yes, drawing has always been a sort of habit of mine. I always have a book and pencils handy. Paul took it up as a young boy and I encouraged it. He drew some of the later ones and I added them in.” “Yes, I thought perhaps he had. You both draw well, but there’s a difference,” she observed.
“Yes, I never really instructed him, he just does things his way and I do them my way.”
“Have you seen the book, Alan?”
“Yes, I’ve seen that book. Andrew showed me his work once some
time ago and then more recently the added ones.” “They are well done.”
“Have either of you ever thought about photography?” she asked out of a short silence.
“We’ve heard about it, and we’ve been interested for some time, but it is too expensive for us to try just yet.” Andrew admitted. “Also, we like that we can draw what we see and not what a camera sees.” “Yes, but it might be interesting for you.” she said.”
Maybe someday we can try it.” Andrew agreed.
“I hear that someone is working on a personal camera that you do not have to be a professional photographer to enjoy using,” Alan put in.”
“Yes, Paul mentioned it in a letter recently,” Andrew agreed. “But I’m not sure what the meeting would think about it. They might think it was too worldly.”
Sheila smiled. “I forgot about that,” she admitted. “That might be a problem.”
They sat on for a while, talking and enjoying their tea until Amy returned from outside.
She was glad to see Sheila there with both of the men and that she was taking part in their conversation. There were definitely changes taking place in her.
Supper that evening was enjoyable for all of them. Sheila participated in the talk around the table and Alan was surprised at how forthcoming she was. After supper was enjoyed and the dishes washed, Lisbeth came to visit with her two children and her husband, Jim Spencer. Jeremy too was still in Fair Hill, but had gone on a trip to buy some more sheep. He still lived at the farm, as he would inherit it. He had married Jim’s sister, Martha, and she was with him on the trip.
“When will Jeremy and Martha be back?” Lisbeth asked sitting in a comfortable rocking chair, holding her youngest on her lap.
“They should be back any day now.” Amy answered. She had Lisbeth’s older child, a girl of three sitting beside her. The youngest was a boy, named for his father. The girl was called Anna.
“Did thee know that Martha is going to have a child?” Amy asked after a pause.
“I found out just before they left. I hope she does not regret going with him.”
“No, she’s strong, she’ll be fine.
Sheila sat beside Alan on a settee, his arm around her shoulders. She felt very safe for the first time she could remember. It was good to be in this comfortable home with a loving family around her, and her husband close beside her. She had never dreamed that it could be this good to be close to Alan. But then, she had never given him a chance. She had always kept him at arm’s length, and she wondered why he had endured that for so many years. She knew that they would have a long talk soon, and she found, to her surprise, that she was looking forward to it. Was she falling in love with her husband? She had no idea, but whatever she was feeling, it was good.
Andrew had gone out to make sure that all was well on the farm, but he came in soon after, and took his granddaughter from near Amy. “I don’t get to see thee much,” He said hugging her close. (she laughed and tugged lightly on his beard. (Love thee, Grandpa,” she said and snuggled into his arms as he took his chair near the fire. He kissed the top of her blonde curls and nestled her in one arm while reaching for his Bible with the other hand. Then he spoke, directing the attention of the others to him.
“Alan, and Sheila, we usually have a time of worship before we sleep. I thought we might have it early so that Lisbeth, Jim, and the children could join us before they have to get the kids home. Thee are welcome to as well, but it isn’t a command.”
Sheila, who had never experienced a Meeting for worship, said she would like to stay, so Alan agreed. He had experienced it many times, both here and at the meetinghouse, and always looked forward to it.
So the silence settled around them, as they all made themselves comfortable and Sheila felt the stress beginning to lift from her. She knew she was in a safe and welcoming place. Nothing would be demanded of her here. She would be given the space to heal and grow in her own time and in her own way. Alan was here too, supporting her and loving her through these difficult times. There was hope for the future now, and somehow, she knew that things would get better and better each day from now on. Andrew spoke out of the stillness, and when she was startled by the suddenness of his words, Alan’s warm hand soothed her with a touch. Andrew read a Scripture passage and then the silence drew her in again. A few minutes passed, and then, Alan spoke, praying aloud for everyone in Fair Hill, and for her and their relationship. He thanked God for the Beckers who had first nurtured Barbara, and who were now nurturing them, and their new life together. After his amen, the silence deepened again, but Sheila noted that the two children were both quietly listening, one in the arms of his mother, the other nestled against her grandfather. Amy’s work worn hands lay quietly in her lap, folded in prayer. Alan held a small New Testament in his hand, which must have been in his pocket. She closed her eyes for a few moments, wanting to immerse herself even more deeply into the silence.
All too soon, the silence was broken by Andrew rising and shaking each person’s hand, as a sign that meeting was broken.
“We’re glad to have thee here, Sheila,” he said, taking her hand. (I believe thee was brought here by the Lord, Just like Barbara was, and that this is the beginning of better times ahead for thee and for Alan.”
“Thank you, Andrew, for having us here, and for your kind words. I believe the same thing, somehow. this is a very healing place.”
“Yes, it is definitely that. When I came home from the war, it was like having salve put on a wound.” he told her, taking his chair again, but keeping his eyes fastened on her face. “I appreciated all of the people here so much after those 4 years, and Amy and my family were here waiting for me.”
“You don’t talk about that much, Andrew,” Alan put in.
“No, I usually don’t. But sometimes, I remember how hard things were then, and I’m very glad for how good they are now.”
“I’m sure you appreciate having such a fine family.” Sheila said quietly.
“yes, very much. But thee still has time to build a good life with Alan.” he said encouragingly. “It isn’t too late, Sheila.”
“Yes, thee is young yet, and still could be parents and even grandparents.” Amy agreed.
“That would be a miracle,” Sheila said blushing a bit.
“but God can work miracles,” Lisbeth said, squeezing Sheila’s hand.
“Sitting here talking to all of you, I almost believe it.” Sheila answered, catching Lisbeth’s enthusiasm.
“Well, that’s a start.” Andrew laughed. “It only takes a little faith.”
soon, Lisbeth and Jim said good-bye, needing to get the children home and in bed.
When they had left, Amy, Andrew, Alan and Sheila gathered around the kitchen table for a cup of hot cocoa and a few cookies before sleep.
“this has been such a wonderful day,” Sheila commented, finishing her cocoa and taking up one last cookie. “thank you both for such a fine welcome.”
“We will keep praying for thee both too,” Amy told her. “I’m glad thee decided to come up here.”
They left the kitchen then, and Amy and Andrew saw to the lamps and the fire as Alan and Sheila went upstairs to get some rest. Alan lit the fire in their room and They settled in to sleep.
Her progress was short lived. That night, as She and Alan lay close together about to fall asleep in the same bed for the first time, he drew her close for a good night kiss. She allowed the kiss, and seemed to enjoy it, but then drew away. As Alan looked at her, her dark hair spread on the pillow, a slight smile on her lips, suddenly, it was as if a mask came down over her face and her look was blank. Alan was no longer sure she even knew who he was. She fell asleep quickly, so quickly, in fact, that he was not sure if it was a natural sleep. He lay beside her for a time, watching her, and finally decided that it was. But he wondered what the next day would bring.
5
Alan woke early the next morning with the crowing of the roosters in the chicken yard. He left Shei
la sleeping, dressed, and went downstairs to find Amy fixing breakfast and Andrew already out doing the chores. He said hello to Amy and then went out to talk to Andrew. He found him in the barn, feeding the stock.
“Alan, thee looks worried. What is it?” Andrew asked, seeing him come in.
“Sheila had a relapse last night. I do not know if she will come out of it today or not. If she does not, we should probably get in touch with doc.”
“Yes, now that thee is in Fair Hill, he is closer. If thee thinks we need him when she wakes, I’ll go and get him for thee.”
They finished the chores together. Having grown up on a farm, Alan had done these same chores at home and needed no coaching. When they reentered the house, he told Amy what had happened.
“I’ll go up and check on her,” she said when breakfast had been eaten. Amy found her still asleep and wrapped the covers around her. Then she came back to the kitchen where the two men waited. “She’s still asleep, and I’m not sure it’s a good thing,” she told them.
“I’m going to get Doc,” Andrew decided and left the farm on his horse to go to the village.
When Andrew and Doc returned to the farm, Doc went up with Alan to check on Sheila.
“I wonder if bringing her here was a good idea,” Andrew mused over a cup of tea.
`I don’t know.” Amy said, worry lines evident on her face. “I’ll certainly do all I can for her, but if she cannot communicate, then how can the problem be fixed?”
“Good question,” Andrew agreed. “We’ll talk to Doc when he comes down.”
When Alan and Doc returned, Amy poured them both some tea and served Doc some breakfast.
“Well, she seems to have reverted to her previous condition.” Doc said between bites. “I thought she was doing well enough to come up here, especially when she asked for a change of scene, but now I’m not so sure.”
“We could have Molly come if thee thinks that might help,” Amy put in. “I will do all I can, Doc, and I do not mind tending her, but she got on well with Molly.”
West From Fair Hill (A Refuge in Fair Hill Book 3) Page 4