“She’s stronger than you think,” I argue.
“But here’s the thing,” he says, quietly. “She shouldn’t have to be.”
His words hang heavy in the air between us. I know he’s right. No matter how much we try to shield her from the fallout, Rose will be hurt by the gossip and press.
“I still think you’re making a mistake,” I say. “It should be up to her.”
I know there’s not much more to be said. I stand and shake my head, hoping that Asher comes to his senses. “Just sleep on it, brother.”
The night has been exhausting. I crawl back into bed with Rose, and she burrows against my chest. Her warmth soothes my frayed nerves. But the worry about what Asher is going to do scratches at the edge of my thoughts and I never quite relax enough to sleep.
The next morning, Asher doesn’t come out of his room, claiming he’s too sore and needs the rest. The air in the apartment is heavy with all of the unsaid words and hurt emotions. I don’t know what changed after the accident, but I’m trying to figure a way to get back to where we were.
To her credit, Rose puts on a brave face and tries to go about her day as if everything is fine. But after lunch, she gives up and crawls back into bed. I want to go back and pound some sense into Asher, but right now I need to make sure Rose is okay.
“Do you want to go out for dinner?” I ask Rose, thinking maybe a change of scenery is in order.
“Do you think Asher will come?”
“I checked in on him a few hours ago. He took some painkillers and is back in bed.”
She bites her lip and turns back to her book. “I don’t feel like leaving. Can we order pizza and watch a movie in bed?”
There’s an edge of sadness to her voice, and it breaks my heart. I go over and gather her in my arms, kissing the top of her head.
“Whatever you want to do, sweetheart.” She sniffs, and I feel her hot tears soak my shirt. “It will be okay. We’ll fix this.”
She pulls back and looks up at me with red-rimmed eyes. “What happened?”
“I don’t know,” I say, feeling just as lost. “Did something happen back at the ball before the accident? Asher just said you were feeling sick and he was taking you home.”
“We had a moment.” Rose squeezes her eyes shut and buries her head in my chest. “And I told him I loved him.”
“Oh.” I figured it had to be something like that for him to pull the emergency brakes on our budding relationship.
“Oh?” Rose pulls back and narrows her eyes. “Oh? Did you know this was going to happen?”
“Asher’s emotionally constipated,” I say by way of explanation. I mean, fuck, how can I explain Asher’s fucked up world view?
“Dammit, Leo, what does that even mean? Give me a straight answer.” Rose is angry which is a million times better than the shell of a person she’s been the last twenty-four hours.
“His parents are a piece of work,” I say with a sigh. “He’s got some screwed up notions about love and family.”
She pushes away, frowning. “That’s just an excuse. We all have fucked up families. My mother couldn’t be bothered to raise me. She dragged me along on her tours, passing me from one unqualified nanny to the next. If I can still imagine us being together why can’t he?”
I would have never dreamt of breaking Asher’s confidence, but I feel like Rose has a right to know why he’s rejecting her.
“I don’t even know where to start. He doesn’t believe in love. At least not the way you or I might. His mother had one affair after another.”
“But this isn’t cheating,” Rose says, interrupting me. “I’d never cheat on either of you.”
“It wasn’t just that his mother cheated. There were a lot of other issues. The esteemed Mayor Knight used to beat the crap out of Asher on a regular basis.” I gather her up in my arms and kiss her temple. “His mother did nothing to stop it. Asher felt betrayed by the two people who were supposed to love him unconditionally. He doesn’t get close to people.”
“He’s close to you,” she says and leans her head against my shoulder.
“We share a long history. My house was only marginally better,” I say. “We helped each other escape, and we’ve relied on each other ever since.”
“Are you trying to tell me that he’ll never love me back?” Rose asks.
I can see the pain in her eyes, but I can’t lie to her. “I don’t know, sweetheart. But if anyone can make him love, you’d be the woman to do it.”
I roll her over on the bed and kiss her slow and deep, savoring the feel of her beneath me. She melts against me and wraps an arm around my neck. I have no idea how long we lay there, kissing with long lazy strokes of our tongues before she finally pulls away.
“Is this over between us? Is this goodbye?” I can hear the desperation in her voice.
“No, damn it.” I kiss her again with more force, raw and unapologetic in its intensity. “We’ll fix this, I promise.”
The next morning, Asher is at the office before we even wake. Knowing the situation between us is still unresolved, I suggest she stay home and recover from the accident.
“You’re kidding, right? We’re all adults, and we promised that no matter what happens at the penthouse, it won’t interfere with work. You both have kept that promise and so will I.” She strolls into the elevator ahead of me and pushes the button for the ground floor with a little too much force. “Besides, I’m not going to hide in my room like I’ve done something wrong. If Asher has a problem with me, he needs to tell me to my face.”
I have to bite back the smile when she turns and glares at me as if daring me to contradict her. She has that fire back in her eyes, and I take a deep breath for the first time in days. We’ll get past this little bump. I’m sure of it.
I thumb through my email on my phone as we ride down to the office. With everything that’s happened over the last two days, it feels like I’ve been away from the office for a month, not just a weekend. A calendar reminder pops up, and I groan inwardly. The closing for one of our smaller acquisitions is just a week away. I’m going to have to leave town to handle all the last minute legal matters. The timing couldn’t be worse.
“I have to go to Austin soon,” I say. “It’s just an overnight trip. Are you okay with that? I know things are a bit awkward with Asher right now.”
“I don’t need you to babysit me,” she says, giving me a side-eye. “I can deal with Asher.”
“God, I love you.” I lean over and kiss her quickly as we pull up to the office. The fact that she’s wants to handle Asher’s shit and stand up for herself helps me relax. We’ll fix this. Relieved, I get out of the car and lean down to help her.
She humphs and swats my hand away, getting out on her own.
I bark out a laugh. “You’re so fucking cute when you’re mad.” If nothing else, she and Asher are in for one hell of a fight. I, for one, can’t wait for the make-up sex.
15
Rose
I go into the office I’ve been sharing with Asher with every intention of ignoring him. If he wants to be an asshole, so be it. Two can play childish games. Unfortunately, it’s more torture for me than it seems to be for him. As a matter of fact, the jerk seems relieved that I’m not talking to him.
He and Leo have a lunch meeting, and I stay behind to finish up my latest reports. I order in sushi from the place around the corner and eat by myself for what seems like forever. One of the guys has been by my side almost twenty-four hours a day for the last few months. And for the first time in my life, I’m uneasy being alone.
I flop down on the sofa in the corner of the office and pick at my sad, single serving Bento box. It reminds me of that day, not so long ago when Asher sat here discussing my taste in ménage fiction. He’d been open and teasing, and I ache to have that easiness back.
Tears burn the back of my throat, and I toss my mostly uneaten lunch in the trash, my stomach sour. I’m glad Leo is leaving town. It will give me
time to think and regroup. Because he’s right about one thing, we need to fix this. I’m not sure how, but something needs to give.
My cell rings, bringing me out of my morose thoughts. Unfortunately, it’s the last person I want to talk to.
“Hi, mom.”
“Oh, good. I got you. You’re so hard to reach these days.” She’s practically yelling to be heard over the noise in the back. Music, loud voices. It was the soundtrack of my life.
“Well, you have me now. What do you need?”
“Can’t your mother just call and check in on you?” she asks, sounding annoyed.
“I don’t remember the last time you called to just chat. I’m busy, Mom. If this is a social call—”
“Are you coming home for the holidays?” Her words shock me. It’s like she’s suddenly started speaking in tongues. Words like home and holidays were never part of our vernacular. “Well, are you?”
“We haven’t celebrated Christmas since I was five and I didn’t even know Thanksgiving was a holiday until I was in my teens. So exactly what holiday am I supposed to be joining you for?”
“The band and I are having a little Thanksgiving get together while we’re here in Denver. Everyone is inviting their family. I thought you’d like to join us. The band really miss you.”
The very idea seems comical, but then again, what am I going to do over Thanksgiving? It’s not like things are going well with the guys. I’m sure they have plans of their own. The overall flux of our situation leaves me unsettled.
And it’s that temporary nature of my personal life that has me reconsider my mother’s offer. Now that I’m older, maybe it is time to make peace with this part of my life and try to rebuild a different kind of relationship with her.
I’m just on the cusp of accepting when my mom adds a key detail she’d left out. “MTV is doing this series about life of the road. They’ll be here shooting some footage. I think the producers would love to see me with my daughter, so it would be great if you could make it.”
That optimistic feeling I had pops, and I’m back to being pissed. It figures that she only wants me there to make herself look better. I steel my resolve. I have enough drama in my life right now. The last thing I need it to deal with my mom. “I can’t make it. I have to work. And even if I could, I wouldn’t come. I’m not a prop for you to parade around. I’m your fucking daughter. Give the band my love. I’ll talk to you soon.”
I hang up the phone before she has a chance to argue. It’s about time I stopped reacting to things in my life. I need to be proactive, and I know the first place I want to start.
I dial the real estate person I’d been in contact with after moving in with the guys. “Hi, Mary. Is that place on Jackson still available? I’d like to put down a deposit.”
The week is surprisingly busy. With the Austin closing coming up and the Takei deal winding down, we all have a million things to do. The relationship status seems to be in the awkward holding pattern. Asher and I share an office. We live together, but we might as well be strangers. I hardly ever see him anymore. He’s taken to working late at night and leaving before the sun is up. But somehow, he’s conveniently absent when I’m at the office.
I put down a deposit on the apartment I liked but still haven’t decided if I’m really going to leave. Leo seems to think this is temporary and Asher is going to come around. I’m not so sure. Leo’s trip creeps up on us with no resolution to the tension at the penthouse.
I drive with Leo to the airport and see him off. Like a nervous parent leaving their child for the first time, Leo assures me a hundred times he’ll be back as soon as he can. I assure him that everything will be fine. Actually, this trip is perfect. Asher and I need time alone to work out our problems.
After seeing Leo off, I go back to the penthouse instead of the office and wait for Asher to get home. We have tonight to work this out, and I’m not letting him weasel out of it. I open a bottle of wine and grab my book, expecting him to come in late, but I’m surprised when he shows up at five.
“We need to talk,” he says before even taking off his jacket.
“I agree. Wine?”
He huffs and rolls his neck, like a prize fighter preparing for battle. “Sure, I’ll have a glass.”
I pour the wine and hand it to Asher, my fingers brushing his. He closes his eyes and sucks in a deep breath. “We can’t go on like this,” he says.
“I agree,” I say, stepping forward.
“Rose, I mean it. This isn’t working,” he says, retreating. “One of us is going to get hurt.”
I take another step forward, humming my agreement. “You’re probably right, but I willing to take the risk.”
He grabs both my shoulders, stopping me. “Damn it, Rose. This isn’t a game.”
“Trust me, I realize this isn’t a game, Asher.”
Here goes nothing. I go up on my tiptoes and bury both my hands into his dark hair, crushing my lips to his. He tenses against me, and I think he’s going to pull away, but instead, he wraps an arm around me, pulling me tighter against him. I can feel the hard ridge of his cock pressing against my center.
Relief courses through me, and I melt against his hard body as he deepens the kiss. Warmth pools in my center and I try to get closer, the barrier of our clothing frustrating me more than ever. I need to feel him, skin on skin like I need to take my next breath. I go for his shirt, but he catches my wrist, pinning it behind my back, and continues to devastate me with his lips.
I’m not sure how long we stand there in the foyer kissing. A minute or an hour, but when he pulls back, I feel like a weight has been lifted. We’re going to be fine. Asher might not be good with emotions, but I felt it in his kiss. He loves me. And I can wait until he’s ready to admit it to himself.
“I won’t be at the office tomorrow,” he says.
I blink up at him, still hazy from that mind-numbing kiss. The change in topic has given me mental whiplash. “Why?”
“I’m looking at some properties. I think it’s time I move out. It will be better for all of us.”
“What? No,” I say, shaking my head. It doesn’t make sense. I’m standing there still in his arms after the kiss to end all kisses, and he’s basically breaking up with me. “You can’t move out.”
“I told you, I’m not going to get in the way of you and Leo. It’s awkward with me living here.”
“It’s awkward because you made it awkward, you idiot.” I pound my fist on his chest, forgetting about the ribs and he catches me by the wrist.
“Don’t make this harder than it has to be, Bambi.”
“Fuck you and your Bambi,” I say. “If this was your plan all along, why did you wait until Leo left town? Are you afraid he’d call you on your bullshit? Well, I have news for you, I’m not going to let you.”
He laughs, but there’s no joy in it. “What are you going to do, Bambi? Tie me up until Leo gets home?”
“Don’t tempt me,” I say under my breath. “What’s wrong with you, Asher? Why can’t you accept the fact that I’m in love with both you and Leo?”
He sighs and runs a hand through his hair. “It was never meant to last. None of us expected it to get this far, not even you.”
“Leo did,” I say, feeling a little desperate. “And I do now. Would it be so hard for you to just try?”
“I can’t,” he says, stepping away from me. “Leo is the closest thing I have to a real family. I’m not going to let my attraction to you ruin our friendship, and I sure as hell am not going to stand in his way.” Asher kisses the top of my head and steps around me, heading towards his rooms. “Don’t blame yourself, Bambi. It was bound to happen eventually.”
At that moment, I realize he’s not going to change his mind. I feel like the rug has been pulled from under my feet. That foolish man. I have no idea how Leo is going take the news. But one thing’s for sure, despite what Asher said, I’m the one to blame for this whole mess. I’m the one that changed the rules and tri
ed to make our relationship more than it was. I’m the one who was stupid enough to believe that they both would want it. This mess is my fault.
With that realization, I know what I need to do. I go back to my room and pack my things. I don’t have much besides clothes. I can take most of it with me and send for the rest later. It only takes about an hour which I find disturbing. So much has happened in the last few months but in reality, it was easy to erase the fact that I’d ever been here. That sobering thought shores up my resolve and I knock on Asher’s door.
“Go away, Rose. We’ve got nothing else to talk about.”
Undeterred, I knock again.
“You’re not going to change my mind.”
“Fine,” I yell through the closed door. “If you won’t talk to me, I’ll leave the elevator key on the table.”
I stalk over to the table and toss down the key along with a letter addressed to both Asher and Leo, and my resignation. I look around the penthouse that was starting to feel like home one last time and sigh. Maybe Asher is right. This was never meant to last.
I’ve got the apartment, but I decide to head to Denver to see my mom. Some distance will help me think. When I get back, I’ll figure out what my next step will be.
The elevator opens, and I walk out of Asher and Leo’s life for good. I know it’s not fair to Leo to leave like this, but I can’t face him. If he asks, I will stay, and I can’t stay. By the time he gets home, I’ll be in another state, another time zone.
The Uber I ordered still isn’t here when I reach the main floor. I go outside and wait. I need the cold November air to help clear my head. As soon as I step outside, I notice white sedan sitting at the corner. An older man gets out as soon as he sees me.
“Rose?”
I grab my bag and head to the car. I give the address to a hotel near the airport and crawl into the back seat. I’m doing the smart thing, right? It’s better if I leave now before things get too serious. The only trouble is, they’re already serious—at least for me. I lean against the cool leather, closing my eyes as the car pulls away. I refuse to cry until I’m alone.
Her Billionaire Bosses: A Menage Romance Page 9