by Laura Scott
Not the holiday she’d envisioned, but being safe was more important.
Her son must have heard Ian’s conversation as well, as he kept glancing over toward his bedroom. “Mom, do you think Mr. Ian is mad at someone?” he asked in a loud whisper.
“I don’t know, but I’ll go ask since dinner is almost ready.” She set the spoon aside and strode over to Ben’s bedroom. As she lifted her hand to knock, the door unexpectedly swung open revealing Ian’s tall, muscular frame.
“Hi,” she said awkwardly, taking a step back while trying not to notice just how great Ian looked all rumpled from sleep. Her mouth suddenly went dry, as being in close proximity to Ian brought the ten-year-old memory of their last kiss abruptly to the forefront, as if it had happened yesterday. She swallowed hard. “Is everything all right?”
He stared at her for a long moment before he broke the connection and shrugged. “Yeah, I’m fine. Sorry about falling asleep on you like that. Is everything okay here? Did you see anyone around?”
“No, why?” She noticed the way Ian was staring out the windows, not that there was much to see in the darkness. There were no street lights nearby and even the blanket of snow didn’t help to provide much illumination. “Are you expecting someone?”
He hesitated, then shook his head. “No, of course not. Just curious.”
Sarah wasn’t sure why the easy camaraderie they’d had earlier when setting up the generator had vanished, leaving a silted awkwardness behind. She took another step backward, putting even more space between them. “I hope you’re hungry, because dinner is almost ready. Nothing fancy, just canned beef stew.”
“I am hungry and canned beef stew sounds great,” Ian said with a halfhearted smile. She decided that his telephone conversation must not have gone very well. “But, uh, I just need to take a walk outside for a bit.”
“Can I go with you?” Ben asked, abandoning his string of garland to rush over to where Ian stood.
“Ben, why don’t you give Mr. Ian some privacy?” she suggested, figuring Ian needed to use the outhouse. “You can take a walk tomorrow.”
“Your mom is right, it’s pretty dark out so there isn’t much to see,” Ian said to Ben, real regret shimmering in his gaze. “I’ll be back soon and then tomorrow we’ll take a long walk, see if we can find any wildlife.”
“I guess,” Ben mumbled, looking disappointed.
Sarah sensed that Ian was determined to go alone, so she walked over to put her hand on Ben’s shoulder. “If you’re tired of making garland, we can play a game of Go Fish,” she suggested. “As soon as Mr. Ian returns we’ll have dinner.”
Ian sent a thankful glance in her direction. “I won’t be gone long,” he said, pulling on his jacket and shoving his feet into his boots.
Sarah sensed something was going on with Ian, but was determined not to pry. After all, she had secrets of her own. Granted, Ian knew she was running from David, but she hadn’t confided the details of her disastrous marriage.
And frankly, she didn’t want to. She’d pulled herself together over the two years since her divorce and, as far as she was concerned, she’d put all of the bad memories behind her.
She’d come to Crystal Lake to start over in the one place she’d always been happy. Ben would flourish here in a small town atmosphere, and she wanted to give her son a chance to have a stable upbringing. He’d blossomed during the year David had spent in jail.
“Okay,” Ben agreed, rifling through his backpack to find the pack of Go Fish cards she’d bought at a rummage sale. She turned down the heat beneath the beef stew, then moved the box of fabric off the table to make room for the card game.
As they played, Sarah found it difficult to concentrate, especially when she caught a glimpse of Ian through the kitchen window. She frowned, wondering why he was walking through the backyard. Was he checking on the generator?
When Ian hadn’t returned after the first game of Go Fish, she dealt another hand, her stomach knotting with worry. What was taking Ian so long? Obviously he was doing more than using the outhouse. Did he believe someone was out there?
Had he discovered that David was in town?
Her blood pressure spiked at the thought. No, David had been scheduled to be released by noon today. He couldn’t know where she’d gone. She wanted to believe her ex-husband would follow the court order and not come after her and Ben at all, but she couldn’t afford to assume David had truly changed after his stint in jail. If he did try to find her, he’d likely attempt to call her grandparents first, although she’d already warned them not to give away her location. Her grandparents had never liked David much, and while she hadn’t confided any details of what she’d been through, the fact that he’d been sent to jail had only convinced them that she’d made the right decision in divorcing him.
No, she wasn’t worried that her grandparents would give her location away.
But she lived in fear that David might remember the brief time early in their relationship when she’d talked about her amazing summer vacation in Crystal Lake. Thankfully, she’d never brought him up here. David had been too busy making her stay home to cater to his every need.
But that didn’t mean he couldn’t find the location of her grandparents cabin if he really wanted to.
“I won again,” Ben crowed.
She smiled wanly and threw her cards down. “Yes, you sure did.” Sneaking a subtle glance at her watch, she realized Ian had been gone for almost twenty minutes.
Should she go outside to look for him? Or stay inside and eat dinner with her son?
Eat dinner, she decided firmly. She wasn’t interested in living her life around the whim of a man she’d known ten years ago. Ian could eat cold stew for all she cared.
The moment she rose to her feet, she heard the stomping of footsteps on the front porch. Ian came in through the door, his usual smile back on his face.
“Brr, it’s cold out there.”
An overwhelming wave of relief made a mockery of her determination to remain independent and emotionally distant. “Is there something wrong with the generator?” she asked as he stripped off his coat, hat and gloves.
“It’s fine,” he assured her. “And there’s no sign of anyone else out there either.”
For some reason, that statement didn’t reassure her the way it should have. Why was he looking around outside in the first place? What had that phone call been about? She wanted to ask, but with Ben sitting there listening to their conversation, she decided to wait until later.
Sarah dished up generous portions of beef stew and set them on the table. This time Ben folded his hands, waiting patiently for her to start the evening meal prayer.
She took a deep breath, closed her eyes for a moment and cleared her mind. She liked the way even a simple prayer could bring a sense of peace. “Dear Lord, we thank You for providing the food we are about to eat and for providing us with shelter from the elements. We ask that You keep us safe in Your care. Amen.”
“Amen,” Ben echoed.
“Amen,” Ian added.
She opened her eyes and glanced up at Ian, surprised to see that he’d folded his hands and responded verbally to her prayer. He hadn’t participated in their breakfast prayer, so what had changed his mind?
Was it possible that he was open to believing in God, after all? She found herself hoping he was.
Since both Ben and Ian seemed to be waiting for her, she smiled and decided to lighten the tone. “Dig in,” she said.
Ben grinned and made a big show of taking a healthy bite of his food.
“Hot, hot!” he exclaimed, dropping the spoon back into his bowl and waving his hand in front of his mouth.
“Here drink some water,” she urged, pushing in his glass closer to him.
He gulped the water as Ian chuckled. “Ben, I realize you’re hungry, but you’re supposed to blow on your food to cool it off before you eat it. Like this,” he added, demonstrating by gently blowing on his spoonful of stew.<
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Sarah couldn’t help compare Ian’s good-natured response to the way David would have responded with a sharp, scathing reprimand.
And while the last thing she wanted was the complication of another man in her life, she realized that not only was Ian smart, funny, sweet and sincere, but he was an amazing role model for her son.
Everything she’d once dreamed of having in a husband.
Ian wasn’t sure how he felt about the happiness reflected in Sarah’s eyes when he’d joined her evening prayer. He didn’t want to pretend he knew anything about faith or God, but as she’d prayed, he found he agreed wholeheartedly with her words.
He was thankful for the food she’d cooked for him, twice now. He was also thankful to be here, spending time with Sarah and her son. And he wanted to believe that God would keep Sarah and Ben safe in His care.
After walking the perimeter of the cabin, he was reassured that no one had been out there. At least he hadn’t found any human prints other than his own. Plenty of deer tracks and other small game, but nothing to be afraid of.
Ian knew that if Jesse had been there, his brother wouldn’t have left any tracks behind. The Army had taught Jesse well, and Ian knew that in the few hours that he’d been gone, his brother had the ability to cover several miles. His brother was at home in the wilderness, even in winter.
Still, Ian planned to head back to his place tonight, just to make sure his brother wasn’t there or that Jesse hadn’t left some sort of parting message for him.
Not that either scenario would help him hang onto his job.
For a moment a wave of sheer desperation hit hard. What would he do if he lost his position? If he was let go from the sheriff’s department, it wasn’t likely that he’d find a job elsewhere. He wasn’t even sure any hospital would hire him as a security guard at half his salary.
“Ian, is something wrong?” Sarah’s voice interrupted his depressing thoughts.
He realized he’d been scowling and cleared his expression, forcing a smile. “No, I’m fine. The stew was great. Thanks again for making dinner.”
“You’re welcome. It’s the least I can do since you’ve provided the generator for us to use,” she said. “Do you have to work again tonight?”
Regret stabbed deep. “No, I’m off for the next couple of days. But I have to head home for a while to take care of a few things.”
“All right. Let me know if you need any help,” she offered.
For a moment Ian was tempted to confide in Sarah, but then realized it wouldn’t be fair to make her share his burdens. After all, she had personal problems of her own.
One in particular that he needed to dig into for her. He wanted to know more about her ex-husband.
“I’m all done, Mom,” Ben announced, dropping his spoon into the empty bowl with a clatter.
“Carry your dishes to the sink,” Sarah reminded him. “Why don’t you do some more work on the garland?”
“Garland?” Ian echoed in surprise.
“Yes, I found a box of fabric scraps in the main bedroom, left over from my grandmother’s quilting days,” Sarah explained. “We’re going to decorate the small pine tree outside for Christmas.”
Ian was humbled to realize that despite everything that Sarah had gone through, she was determined to celebrate the holiday. He thought back to what he might have at his place. He’d never bothered to decorate much for Christmas, but he was sure he had a box of ornaments tucked away in the basement.
“I’ll wash the dishes before I leave,” he said, when he’d finished his stew.
“It’s no bother,” Sarah said waving away his offer. “Now that we have electricity, it doesn’t take long for the water to get hot.”
“I insist,” he said firmly. He knew he owed her more than cleaning a handful of dishes for letting him sleep half the day away. He was still embarrassed at how he’d conked out on her son’s bed.
She looked as if she wanted to argue, but must have decided not to waste her breath. Instead, she placed a pot of melted snow on the electric stove and turned on the burner beneath it.
When the water was hot, he added dish soap and then quickly washed the dishes. Sarah picked up a towel and dried them, and working alongside her like this made him realize how lonely his life was.
Oh he’d dated on and off, but nothing serious. Joanna, the woman he’d planned to marry, had decided out of the blue that she couldn’t stand living in such a small town as Crystal Lake. She’d gone behind his back to find a new job in the Twin Cities and, when he’d refused to move, she’d handed back his ring and left the very next day.
Truthfully, he could look back at that now and admit that Sarah was right. He was glad he’d discovered the truth before getting married.
“Thanks for doing the dishes,” Sarah said, taking the last pan from his hand and drying it.
“You cooked,” he reminded her. “It’s only fair that I clean up.”
She glanced at him from beneath her lashes. “So you don’t consider cooking and cleaning women’s work?” she asked. Her tone was light, but the expression in her eyes was intensely serious.
“Of course not,” he said, wondering if that was what her husband had thought. “Living alone, I have to do everything myself. Sharing the cooking and cleanup work is a bonus.”
She smiled and his heart flipped in his chest. As crazy as it might seem, Sarah was more beautiful now than she had been at seventeen.
For a long second awareness sizzled between them. He ached to draw her into his arms, the way he had all those years ago.
“Mom, I hav’ta go to the bathroom.”
The urgency in Ben’s voice shattered the moment and Sarah instantly turned away to attend to her son. Ian took a deep breath, trying to control the flash of desire.
What was he thinking? The last thing Sarah would need is for him to start acting the way he had back when they were teenagers. She was a mother now, and he wasn’t in a position to start a relationship. Not when he didn’t know if he still had a career.
He finished cleaning the kitchen and then pulled on his boots and winter coat. He’d head back home to do a little research on David Franklin, to see what Sarah and Ben were up against. And while he believed they were safe for the moment, he didn’t like the thought of leaving them here alone all night.
He’d camp out on the sofa, especially since having slept all afternoon, he wasn’t tired.
He walked outside, watching from the porch as Ben came running back from the outhouse. “Do you hav’ta go to the outhouse too?” he asked.
“No, I have to head home for a little while,” he said with a smile. The kid’s enthusiasm was infectious. “But I’ll be back later tonight, okay?”
“Okay,” Ben agreed readily.
Ian opened the cabin door for him, watching in amusement as the child stripped off his winter coat, hat and boots and left them in a jumble on the floor. He followed Ben inside, taking a moment to hang the boy’s coat on the hook near the door. “Take your hat and mittens and put them on the stove to dry out,” he instructed.
Ben heaved a sigh but did as he was told.
Satisfied, Ian headed back outside. He was halfway to his truck when he noticed Sarah striding toward him. “You’re leaving?” she asked.
“Just for a few hours,” he said. “I don’t want to impose, but I’d really like to sleep on your sofa tonight, if that’s okay with you.”
“There’s no need, we’ll be fine,” Sarah said, crossing her arms over her chest.
“I know you and Ben will be fine, but will you please humor me? I won’t sleep at all knowing you and Ben are here alone.”
There was a long pause before she finally nodded. “Okay, if you insist. But you can’t stay with us forever, Ian,” she said frankly. “At some point I need to be able to stand on my own two feet.”
That was the second time she’d alluded to the fact that she wanted to be independent, and he sensed that her need to do so was tied up in the m
ess her ex-husband had left behind.
“Sarah, you’re doing an amazing job of being on your own,” he told her. “There’s a big difference between being safe and being independent. My priority is keeping you both safe.”
She stared up at him and he wished for light so he was able to read her expression more clearly. “Thank you, Ian,” she finally said in a husky voice. “I think that’s the nicest thing any man has ever said to me.”
Her confession rocked him back on his heels. He couldn’t bear to imagine what Sarah must have suffered with her ex. Before he could think about the ramifications of his actions, he pulled her close and lowered his mouth to hers in searing kiss.
Chapter Five
Sarah clung to Ian’s broad shoulders, quickly losing herself in the heat of his kiss. Passion sparked between them, almost as if the last time they were together like this was just a few months ago rather than ten full years.
He tasted so much better than she remembered, her mouth practically melting beneath his. How was it that she’d forgotten what it was like to be held and kissed by Ian?
As much as she longed to stay in the comfort and safety of his arms, she was all too aware of the fact that her son was inside the cabin. The thought that Ben might be watching through the window gave her the strength she needed to break free of Ian’s embrace. She stood for a moment, gasping for breath wishing she didn’t feel so light-headed and shaky. Since when did a simple kiss wreak havoc on her equilibrium?
Since Ian.
“Sarah,” he began, but she quickly cut him off.
“Don’t.” She didn’t want to hear an apology or, worse, some platitude about how this shouldn’t have happened at all. “Please, just don’t say anything, Ian. Let’s just chalk this up to old times and move on. Besides, I have to go. Ben is waiting for me inside. I’ll see you later.”