Kanako shut her eyes tight and swung the staff down. But it didn’t hit Makina.
The staff suddenly disappeared in a puff of smoke, and Kanako’s witch outfit followed.
Kanako opened her eyes and looked around in panic.
Yuichi walked up to Kanako’s side. “Orihara. If you really want her to pay for what she did, let me do it. You don’t need to dirty your own hands.”
“I don’t know... suddenly, the idea that it’s all her fault... it’s all stopped seeming real. But...” she rambled, sounding disoriented. It was probably hard for her to know what to be angry at.
“I know it’s not my place to suggest this... but why not focus on the future?” Yuichi asked. “I don’t think she’ll interfere in your destiny anymore. And if you have anything more to say to her, you can give her an earful after she wakes up.”
Yuichi knew that there were probably better ways to comfort the girl, but this was the best he could think of.
“There are probably other people like her,” Kanako said worriedly. “If they come after me, will you protect me again, Yuichi?”
“I’ll pound every one of them into the dirt,” Yuichi promised, relieved that Kanako wasn’t inclined to argue. “I’ll keep proving that destiny is what we make of it.”
Even so, the castle was falling apart as they spoke. Yuichi looked towards the tower door, and saw that the corridor had completely collapsed. There was no way they could reach the roof of the school like this.
The Black Tower itself was already half gone. He could see night sky through the floor. If they fell from here, gravity might reverse, and they’d end up back in the castle.
Yuichi hefted Makina up on one arm, then tossed her through a hole in the wall.
“Huh?” Kanako’s mouth fell open in shock.
He had to acknowledge that it probably did look a little heartless, even if he had just punched her in the stomach.
“It’s okay,” he reassured her. “We’re not up that high, and she’s hard to kill.”
Yuichi looked up to check that Makina was “falling” towards the athletics field above them, and it seemed that the gravity did indeed reverse the minute they left the castle walls. Makina hit the field, but there was no explosion of blood around her, suggesting that she was probably still alive.
“Orihara, are you okay with jumping down?” he asked, though even if she said she wasn’t, they didn’t have much of a choice.
Fortunately, Kanako nodded obediently, and walked up to Yuichi.
“I’ll be holding you, so you’ll be safe,” Yuichi said. “Yeah, that’s right. Like you held me before— huh?”
Kanako was squeezing him tightly. It wasn’t really any different from what Aiko had done when he’d jumped off the roof with her, but this time — perhaps because he had more time to think about it — it made him feel a little self-conscious.
“Okay. Ready?” He wrapped Kanako’s legs around his waist, then jumped out from the wall.
Immediately, gravity reversed, and they fell towards the athletic field.
It was his second time and he was used to it, so Yuichi easily reoriented himself and hit the ground with his five-point fall.
“Are you okay?” Yuichi asked. He set Kanako down on the ground and checked her over.
“Yeah... falling wasn’t as bad as I imagined it.” Kanako smiled.
Yuichi, feeling bashful, looked up at the sky. As the upside-down castle crumbled, it also became fainter, slowly fading into the night sky.
Yuichi let out a breath of relief. It seemed like it was all over.
He looked back to the school and saw Mutsuko and Aiko running towards them.
Epilogue 1: Say Hello to the New Love Interest!
It was two days later, on Wednesday. Yuichi was walking to school with Aiko.
“Hey, how are your injuries?” Aiko asked in concern.
“They’re in the realm of okay, I think,” Yuichi said. His left arm was capable of moving again. It was a little sore, still, but he could more or less use it. His right leg had already healed completely the day before. The damage he inflicted on himself with furukami was relatively easy to recover from. Maybe despite surpassing his limits, he had still kept enough power in reserve to accelerate the healing.
“It’s all back to normal after everything that happened. It almost feels unreal...” Aiko looked around in disbelief as they walked through the school gate.
The events Kanako and Makina had set in motion had sent a shockwave through the whole school. Yet, the impact didn’t seem to have lasted at all. They’d been given Tuesday off, but now that the school was back to normal, it was as if nothing had happened. About the only people affected were the clubs that used the gym, who couldn’t use it again until repairs were complete.
The incidents of the day before had been written off as a prank played by the students who’d stayed at the school because of the fog. The chaos had continued late into the night, but when the teachers — who had been in a deep sleep for some reason — woke up, they had gotten everything under control. They obviously couldn’t have just held classes the next day as if nothing had happened, so the students had been given the day off; however, with no lasting issues in sight, they’d been told they’d resume normal classes on Wednesday.
“It seems like not many people even remember what happened,” Yuichi commented. Very few people seemed to remember how the other world had begun to merge with theirs, or that they had been forced to play that bizarre game. The ones that did remember couldn’t prove it, so they just gradually stopped talking about it.
“This is the world’s ability to normalize itself!” Mutsuko announced, looking somewhat surprised and somewhat gleeful.
According to Monika, this had really been a small-scale incident in the grand scheme of things. Outers sometimes triggered huge disasters in which thousands of people died.
But even in those cases, since most of humanity shared the same worldview, they usually just wrote it off as something more “plausible,” like a large earthquake or a hurricane.
Which meant that Outers had caused the deaths of thousands many times before, all for the purpose of their own amusement.
I talked pretty big, saying I’d pound them all into the dirt, but I don’t know how to do it, Yuichi thought.
For now, he’d just have to help Monika collect the Divine Vessels. It seemed like there were quite a few Outers involved in that war, after all.
“What’s with the foreboding expression?” Aiko asked with a frown.
“Huh? Do I have one? Sorry...” Yuichi said. He hadn’t realized he’d been scowling, but he apologized anyway. His anger towards the Outers must have been showing on his face.
They arrived in the classroom, and after a while, the substitute teacher showed up. The man said that Makina hadn’t arrived yet.
Yuichi figured she probably wouldn’t come back. She likely had no more use for the school.
Class proceeded as normal. After class, Natsuki approached Yuichi’s desk.
“Club?” he asked.
“Yes, but would you accompany me for training afterwards?” she asked.
“Oh? The occasional morning visit isn’t enough for you?”
“If I don’t do something, I’ll end up the same way the next time this happens.” Natsuki sounded strangely sulky. She must have felt sensitive about being swatted aside so easily by Makina.
“Hmm, I don’t know how I feel about you getting too strong...” Yuichi murmured, feeling hesitant about the idea of making a serial killer stronger. “But okay.”
He decided to trust Natsuki. She had laid low with the serial killing since she’d started sparring with him, and he couldn’t remain suspicious of her forever.
As they were talking, Aiko arrived, and the three of them headed off for club together.
“I wonder why we’re all just sitting here, doing nothing,” Yuichi muttered impatiently as he sat in the club room, bored to death.
&nbs
p; “I guess because we don’t have a topic yet,” Aiko offered. Since the club was Mutsuko’s, they couldn’t do anything without her there.
Natsuki had a surgical tool catalog open and was poring through it with great interest.
“...going off on your own path?” Yuichi asked her.
“What’s your opinion on disposable-tip scalpels?” Natsuki asked, casually.
“Am I supposed to have an opinion on disposable-tip scalpels?” Yuichi didn’t even know such a thing existed before now.
“Personally, I think there’s no need to be fixated on scalpels!” The door burst open, and Mutsuko strode in. “If any blade will do, how about some sabers? C’mon, Yu wanted them earlier, so I prepared a few sets!”
Mutsuko marched up to the whiteboard and plonked the large bag she was holding onto the table.
“I didn’t want them,” Yuichi said quickly. “I’m never going to wear those things.”
“Aw, but you wanted them earlier!” Mutsuko cried.
“If you’d had them then, I would have used them! I don’t actually want them!”
“C’mon! Behold, the dull shine of this blade!” Mutsuko unleashed the saber attached to her forearm, causing the blade to extend along her arm with a clink. It could have been a toy, except the blade in use gave off a cold, sharp glint. “I remodeled it from last time! By adjusting the angle of the edge, I’ve given it 30% more cutting power!”
“So? Do the remodels give you the ability to sheath the blade once it’s out?” Yuichi looked at Mutsuko, eyes as cold as ice.
“Nice one, Yu... you hit me right where it hurts,” Mutsuko confessed. “True, that’s the saber’s lone weakness... but objecting to every little thing makes you sound like a brother-in-law, you know! You should be a man and not sweat the little details!”
“It’s not a little detail! And if that’s its weakness, you shouldn’t unsheathe it that casually!”
“Fine! If you insist, I’ll make it retractable!” Mutsuko said with a pout.
Once that conversation seemed to be settled, Yuichi turned his eyes towards the entrance of the room, where he had sensed someone watching them for a while. It was Kanako, who was peeking in at them through the wide-open door.
“What’s wrong, Orihara?” he asked.
“Um... I’m not sure if I’m welcome...”
“Come on in. We don’t mind.” It was perhaps presumptuous for Yuichi to speak for them all, but he couldn’t imagine why any of them would mind.
Kanako stepped in, apologetically. With all that had happened, it was only natural that she’d be self-conscious, but he hoped that that would resolve in time.
Maybe it would happen if they just interacted like normal. Yuichi looked at Kanako again, then did a double take.
“Love Interest III” was now the label above Kanako’s head.
That made her the third one, after Aiko and Natsuki. Yuichi didn’t understand why this was happening.
Kanako timidly entered the room and sat down next to Yuichi. “Yuichi, I’m sorry about before. Do you want to go out again sometime? To, um, finish what we started...”
Aiko’s eyes went wide, and Yuichi watched as she bolted to her feet. “C-Could I come with you? It’s just for research, right? There’s no reason you have to be alone, right?!”
“Noro, I’m sorry. It’s date research, so we really need our space...” Kanako hugged Yuichi’s arm, pressing her generous breasts showily up against it.
“A d-d-d-date?! Th-Then I’ll go on a date with Sakaki, and you can watch what we do! Yeah, that’s for the best! That lets you get objective research done!” Aiko cried.
“Noro... what are you talking about?” Yuichi asked, baffled.
“Noro, I really am sorry,” Kanako said. “I’m more interested in subjective research.”
Her response seemed to paralyze Aiko.
“Sakaki, there’s a medical tool trade fair called Medix coming up. Do you want to go with me?” Natsuki asked. Even she seemed to be joining in now.
“Takeuchi... you’re really still thinking about scalpels?” Yuichi asked.
“Ah! As your big sister, I’m not sure how I feel about you becoming a playboy, Yu!” Mutsuko declared.
As annoyed as Yuichi was about all of this, he was soon to find out that this was only the beginning.
He had no idea that even more annoying potential love interests were still waiting in the wings.
Epilogue 2: No Four Fiends, But There Is a Hero
“Oh, Yurimaru. How could you just die like that?”
Yurika heard the voice, then awakened. She saw an arched ceiling above her. Her back felt stiff and achy, and when she checked what she was lying on, she realized it was something long, hard, and wooden, like a bench.
Groggily, she sat up.
She didn’t know where she was. Since she had just woken up, that meant she must have gone to sleep somewhere, but her memory was fuzzy.
She looked around. The area around her seemed to be a church, with lines of pews and an altar with a large cross hanging over it. Yurika’s makeshift bed was a pew in the front row.
She looked to the altar, where the voice had come from, and saw a man dressed in black, wearing a cross around his neck. She assumed he must be a priest.
“Yurimaru... you mean me?” Yurika asked. It was the first question on her mind. Her full name was Yurika Maruyama, but no one had ever called her by that nickname.
“Yes. That is your hero name.” The man’s voice was calm and gentle. Yurika decided he must be a very good priest.
“Hero... hero, hero...” she murmured. There was something familiar about that word. She’d heard it somewhere just a little while ago. After rolling it around in her mouth for a while, she remembered.
Yuichi Sakaki had called her that. Remembering that caused other memories to come flooding back to her.
“Huh? Am I dead?!” Yurika gasped. She remembered being hit into a wall by a man. She had fallen, then had her head crushed. She was sure he had killed her.
Yurika quickly checked herself over. There wasn’t a single injury; she was the picture of health. Even if she had, by some miracle, survived, it was unthinkable that she should be unharmed.
“You died, and came back to life,” the priest said to her. His voice was utterly solemn; he didn’t seem like the joking type.
“Are you serious?” Yurika burst out. “Who are you, anyway?”
Yurika’s initial impression — baseless though it was — had been that the priest was a good person. It was only now that she finally decided to be cautious.
“My name is Kiryu,” the man said. “I serve you, O hero who stands against the revival of the Evil God.”
“Huh? You’re part of this Evil God business, too?” she demanded. All Yurika knew about the Evil God was that it was the source of the power dwelling in her right arm, and that there were villainous types in a frenzy searching for his body parts.
“I am sorrowed to hear you speak that way,” the man said. “I suppose I am part of it, in that I am opposed to the Evil God.”
“You said I died, right?” Yurika demanded. “Then what am I doing here?”
“Because you are a hero,” the man said. “A hero can come back as many times as is needed to vanquish great evil, can they not?”
“No, no, no. That’s only in video games!” Yurika didn’t know much about games, but it sounded like the kind of thing you’d hear in a game that revived you instead of giving you a game over.
“You have the power of a born hero,” the man declared. “Whenever you die, you will always be miraculously resurrected in a church.”
“What?! I had no idea!” she cried.
“Certainly not. A hero never knows what they are until they die.”
“...Fine,” Yurika muttered. “Can we talk about something else now?” The hero talk still sounded fishy to her, but she knew they wouldn’t get anywhere arguing about it.
The priest nodded.
; “I have the Evil God’s right arm. Does that make us enemies?” Yurika asked.
“What you have done was unavoidable. In order to interrupt the ritual of the Evil God’s resurrection, you had no choice but to participate in the ritual.”
“The person who gave me this said that if you bring together the Evil God’s body, you’ll get a wish granted,” she said. “What about that?”
“I cannot allow that to happen,” the man said. “The condition for having a wish granted is to gather all parts of the Evil God except his soul. The risk is too great. In other words, my goal of stopping the God’s revival is mutually exclusive to your goal, hero.”
“I never said that was what I wanted... I guess it’s fine,” she said. “All I wanted to do was play superhero for a bit. So? What do you want to do? Force me to cut ties with him? Is there some benefit to me for doing so?”
“No, I will not ask anything of you,” the man said. “My role is merely to ensure your safe resurrection. The power of my church building is indispensable to your ability.”
“...Can I go for now, then?” she asked. She was starting to worry that she might be confined to the church.
“You may do as you wish,” the man said.
“By the way, where are we?” Yurika asked.
The address the priest gave her was a little ways away from the town where Yurika lived. She’d have to ride a train back.
She was taking out her wallet to make sure she had her IC card with her when she noticed that something felt off. Her wallet felt a bit lighter and thinner than usual. She quickly checked it and, indeed, found it much emptier than before.
“Hey! Care to explain this?” she cried. There were only the two of them there, which meant that the priest must have been the one who took her money.
“It is only natural,” the priest declared, without a trace of shame. “When a hero is revived, they always lose half of their money on hand. That is the rule, is it not?”
✽✽✽✽✽
“So Makina lost, eh?” a voice asked.
The Melancholy of the High School Girl Light Novel Author?! Page 18