Chad felt the dampness under his shirt. If John ever told what he had seen, it would be the end of everything. “He’ll be happier being away from your mother. Let’s go find her. Maybe she’d like to have lunch with us.”
He had no more spoken the words than Bea came rushing toward them, her arms open. “Chad! Son, you’re back! Oh, how good to see you.” She embraced him, and Chad returned the hug, putting on the charm again. “Isn’t it wonderful about the baby! Oh, everything will be good for both of you now, I can feel it.”
“It will, Mother,” Chad replied. “It’s good to be back in Denver.” His arm came around Irene’s waist, and she felt as though she were lying in a grave, with someone shoveling dirt over her, burying her alive.
David Chadwick Jacobs was born in February 1871. Bea and Kirk were beside themselves with joy over their first grandchild.
Within four days of the news, Elly and John came home—John to see the baby, Elly insisting the same but really returning to see the baby’s father. Brother and sister had barely spoken since the day John discovered Elly and Chad together. Elly would stay in Denver now, and John was glad to be rid of her, except for his worry about what she and Chad would do. He was sure that with the baby, and because of Bea’s presence, it would be much more difficult for his sister and Chad to renew their ugly affair. The thought of the hurt Chad had already inflicted upon Irene made it impossible for John to tell his poor sister the truth. Now there was the baby. Maybe everything would be better for Chad and Irene. He could only hope for the best. The worst had already happened.
Chad opened the door to greet them, looking somewhat stunned at first. John gave him a look of renewed warning. “We’re here to see the baby,” he told Chad.
Chad let them inside, struggling to keep his composure, living with the constant fear now that John would tell people the truth. “He’s, uh, he’s beautiful,” he told them both. “Irene was in labor nearly thirty hours, though. She’s still pretty weak. I think you’d better visit her one at a time.”
“Is Mother here?” Elly asked. She almost laughed at how casual Chad was trying to act.
“No. She stayed the first three days, but Irene has Rose and Jenny. Rose helps Irene with the more intimate things that need tending to. Bea had to get back to K-E, and Kirk is in meetings for the Denver and Rio Grande.” He smiled at John. “You’ll be glad to know that within another year a narrow gauge railroad will connect Denver with Colorado Springs. You’ll be able to get to Denver a lot faster once that happens, and vice versa.”
“I don’t intend to come home much,” John said dryly. “I’d like to see Irene.” He looked around the house. “Do you realize I’ve never seen the inside of this place since it was finished? I left for school before you got to move in. When I first got back last year, I was at the mansion, then came to Colorado Springs.” He looked around, studying the unusually beautiful primavera wood that made up the elegant stairway and framed the rich stained-glass wall of the first landing. “Ramon sure does beautiful work, doesn’t he?” He ran his fingers over the curved banister.
Elly glanced at Chad. “Yes, he does,” she cooed. “Wasn’t it smart of Chad to hire Ramon to build his and Irene’s house?” She laughed when Chad reddened at the remark.
John glanced at them. Did Elly know about Ramon and Irene? Had she told Chad? What a bitch she was! She was as deceitful and scheming as their mother, except that Elly had no morals. At least his mother had surely never pulled up her skirts to get what she wanted. He glared at both of them. “Don’t forget my warning,” he told Chad then. “Which room is Irene’s?”
Chad looked up at the circular balcony, nodding to his left. “Second door on that side. You can’t miss it. It’s filled with gifts from well-wishers, friends of the family. And Rose is in there fussing over her.”
John stared at them both a moment longer, then turned and finished climbing the stairs, taking a small flask from his jacket pocket and drinking a quick swallow of bourbon before entering the room. Irene lay holding a tiny baby in the crook of her arm. She looked at John, her eyes lighting up. “John,” she whispered, “you came!”
“Of course I came,” he said quietly.
“Rose, leave us for a minute?” Irene asked the woman. Rose smiled, happy for Irene, hoping against hope that the baby would bring Irene all the happiness her cheating husband had denied her.
John moved to the side of the bed, leaning over to take a look at his new nephew. “He’s beautiful, just like Chad said,” he told Irene. “I’m happy for you, Irene. What about you?” He knelt beside the bed, lightly touching the sleeping baby’s hand.
“This baby means everything to me, John. I’m happy he’s so healthy. I need this child.”
“I can imagine. How are things with Chad?”
“Better. He seems really happy about the baby.” She kissed little David’s soft cheek, praying he wouldn’t grow to look so much like Hank that it would be a dead giveaway. Right now his hair was white-blond, and his eyes a deep blue. Bea had said he looked very much the way Irene looked as a baby. Maybe that meant he would have her coloring, and it would be difficult for anyone to tell he was not Chad’s. She had a little bit of Hank with her forever now! He had given life before he died. If only he could have known he had a son! “He’s such a good baby, John. I’m giving up my work for a few months while I nurse him.”
“That’s good. Don’t ever get so involved you neglect your children, Irene. Don’t do what Mother did.”
She smiled, her face pale but her eyes bright. “I won’t. But there are certain things I want to keep track of, like the ranch. I’d still like to go back to Colorado Springs someday. I just can’t bring myself to face any of that yet.”
“I know.” He rubbed the little hand with his thumb, secretly wondering if this could be Hank Loring’s child. He was not going to upset her by asking. He hoped it was Hank’s, and not the seed of his sister’s bastard husband.
Downstairs Elly pulled Chad into his study, giving him a quick, suggestive kiss. “God, Chad, I’ve missed you so much.”
He gently pushed her away. “Not here and not now. John is too close. I told you when I left Denver you’d have to wait for me to make the first move and let you know when and where we can get together.”
“I can meet you anywhere, anytime.” She ran her hands over his chest and he grasped her wrists.
“Don’t do that, Elly. One of the maids could come in.”
She pouted. “Then close the door.”
He gave her a warning look. “Elly, things are going pretty good right now. Irene and I have made a kind of pact. As soon as she’s healed from the baby, we’re going to try it as husband and wife again. I promised her I’d stay away from other women.”
She let out a sarcastic snicker. “You don’t expect me to believe you’ll keep such a promise, do you? And what have you been up to while we’ve been apart?”
“I have my sources. But things are getting tougher all the time. I’ve got to convince Irene I’m sincere about this, Elly. In the meantime, if I’m going to get caught, it will be a lot better if I’m caught with a prostitute than with my wife’s own sister. That day John walked in on us, I realized the stupid chances we’ve been taking. If John ever talks, or Bea finds out some other way, we’ll lose everything.”
She frowned. “What are you telling me?”
He grasped her arms. “I’m telling you we’ve got to stay away from each other, Elly, for a long time.”
Her eyes began to tear. “I can’t stay away from you, Chad.”
“Do you think it’s easy for me? It has to be this way, Elly. It doesn’t mean we can’t ever be together. It’s just going to have to be more secretive than ever, which means far fewer times. Irene expects me to be home with her every minute I’m not at that office. Even Bea seems to be watching me more closely. I’m telling you, Elly, it’s been a bitch ever since I got back.”
He was not about to tell her he had been finding wa
ys to meet Milicent again. He had run into her in a restaurant, and they casually had lunch as “old friends.” He discovered she no longer worked, but her husband had taken a sales job, riding circuit among several towns surrounding Denver. He was gone for days at a time, and after that first meeting they began arranging times when they could begin seeing each other again.
“Bea and Irene, Bea and Irene,” Elly mocked. “I’m sick of hearing their names.”
“Damn it, Elly, do you want to lose everything? This has nothing to do with wanting to be with you. It just can’t be, that’s all.”
“It’s you I don’t want to lose. Mother and Irene kept me from you in the beginning. Now they’re doing it again. How I hate them both!”
He touched her face, putting on a look of total sincerity. “You aren’t losing me, Elly. We’ve just both got to go our separate ways for a while. I’ve got to see this through, or I’ll lose it all. Besides, I have a son now.”
“Do you?” she asked. “How do you even know its yours? It’s probably Hank Loring’s bastard!”
He flinched almost as though he had been hit. How he hated that word! Irene wouldn’t give birth to a bastard like his own mother had, would she? No! He couldn’t let himself believe it. He had to make this marriage work. If he lost control and hurt her again, or let her think he didn’t love the baby, it would be over. He still wondered himself, could not find the love he should have for his new son because of his deep suspicions. Still, Irene had been so adamant about not having had an affair with Hank.
“I believe it’s mine, Elly, and I have a chance now to patch up this marriage. I have to do it, for your sake as well as mine. You must know that. Getting caught by John could have been a real disaster.”
Her lips puckered. “It’s not over between us, is it, Chad?” A tear slipped down her cheek, and he grasped her shoulders. Finally, he was getting back some of his control! He could thank John for that much.
“No,” he answered. “We’ll find ways, Elly. But in between I’ve got Irene, and there might be others, others who aren’t so dangerous. And you’ll have to do the same. The best thing you could do is get married. That would throw John off the scent for good. Hell, being married doesn’t mean we couldn’t see each other. It might even be a good idea! We could work close together and no one would think anything about it. Hell, there must be a lot of men who would kill to marry you, just to get their hands on Kirkland money.”
“Like you did?” She stiffened and wiped at her tears. Nothing else had made her cry—not her mother’s neglect, or the fact that she felt neither one of her parents loved her, not even getting rid of her and Chad’s baby. But to have to let go of Chad…
“Maybe I did,” he was saying, “but that didn’t keep me from other women’s beds. And you getting married doesn’t have to keep us from being together.”
She turned and walked to his desk, studying a gold paper weight. Then she looked at him, holding her chin haughtily. “Maybe I will get married. If I do, it will be someone who will give Mother a heart attack, someone she hates. She has denied me happiness all these years, always loved Irene more than me. It’s time I paid her back.”
“How do you think you’re going to do that?”
“I don’t know yet. I’ll think of something.” She grinned. “The first thing I’ll do is make Mother very nervous by having a lot of suitors, letting her wonder what I’ll do next. I’ll pick young men who work for competing companies. That should ruffle her feathers some.”
Chad felt the little stab of jealousy, not because he loved and wanted her, but only because of the deep-seated fear that she might find someone who pleased her more.
She came closer, touching his face. “At least I had you for a while, didn’t I? You were mine, Chad, for a lot longer than anyone knows, and in more ways than you ever belonged to Irene. In some ways you’ll always be mine, won’t you?”
He was relieved to see she was not going to throw a fit or make trouble. Surely she realized that she was as trapped as he was. Their knowledge of each other’s stained pasts left them locked in this together. If Elly Kirkland tried to destroy him now, she would go down with him, and she damn well knew it. “You know I will,” he told her. “And I’ll always be the best, won’t I?”
She arched her eyebrows, wanting to torture him the way it would be torture for her to let him go. “Maybe. I haven’t gone man hunting since I came home.”
“Stop it, Elly.”
She smiled wickedly. “We can at least meet just once while Irene is laid up, can’t we? Don’t you have a meeting to go to, something where you can bow out early and meet me someplace?”
“Maybe. But we can’t do anything until John goes back to Colorado Springs.”
She breathed deeply, studying his gray eyes. “I’ll never forget how it was there, Chad. We’ll never again have that much freedom, being together nearly every night for almost a year. The last five months without you have been terrible.”
“They have been for me, too. Now you’d better get up to see the baby before John and Irene both get suspicious.”
She moved to the door to be sure no one was coming, then hurried back over to plant a warm, suggestive kiss on his mouth.
She then cast him a seductive smile before turning and running out. Chad watched after her, aching all over.
Irene disembarked the carriage, wearing a sealskin jacket over her deep blue velvet dress. A late April snowstorm had hit the mountains and had swept into Denver in the form of a cold rain. “Wait for me. I’ll only be a few minutes, Jim. I promise not to make you sit in the rain forever,” she told the driver. The elderly man, who had been driving her family’s carriage for years now, nodded and smiled, thinking how Irene was the nicest member of the Kirkland family, and surely the prettiest.
Irene took a package from the carriage and ducked her head, following a bricked walkway to the double doors of Ramon’s lovely, Spanish-style home. It sat on a rise with a view of the mountains, but today that view was shrouded by gray clouds. It was not the best day to be out visiting, but she wanted to do this while Chad was working, and Ramon, according to the gossip column of the News, had “recently returned to Fort Collins most reluctantly, to continue work on Colorado’s proudest project, the new university. We say reluctantly because Mr. Vallejo left his new bride behind.”
Irene’s heart beat a little faster as she knocked on the heavy oak doors, on which were intricately carved scenes of trees and flowers. She studied the carvings lovingly while she waited, standing under the protection of a wide veranda. Moments later a very beautiful young girl opened the door, and Irene felt a rush of painful jealousy at the sight of her. She wanted to hate this woman, just because she had the privilege of enjoying the exquisite pleasure of sharing Ramon Vallejo’s bed. She thought she was prepared for this moment, but it still hurt, in spite of the fact that she could not help being glad for Ramon’s happiness.
“You must be Anna,” she spoke up.
“Sí. May I help you?”
“I am Irene Jacobs. My father is David Kirkland. Maybe Ramon has spoken of me?”
She watched a strange sadness come into the woman’s eyes, mixed with a hint of jealousy and even fear, as though she had suddenly been threatened. “Si, he has spoken of you.” The young woman seemed suddenly very nervous as she stood aside. “Please come in.”
“Gracias,” Irene answered, stepping inside. She instantly thought how being inside this house must be like stepping into Mexico. She looked around in wonder and admiration. There was not one thing American about the house. It was filled with plants, Mexican-designed rugs not only on the floors but also on the walls. Everything was immaculate, and everything spoke of Ramon. She could almost feel his arms around her just by being in this room.
She turned to Anna. “Your house is very beautiful.”
“Thank you.” Anna watched her expectantly, looking a little defensive, and Irene realized how awkward she must feel.
“I
’ll only be a minute. I…wanted to bring this gift for you and Ramon. I know Ramon is in Fort Collins, but I wasn’t sure when I’d get another chance.”
Anna looked at the gift curiously. “Sí,” she answered. “He took several days off after we were married, but then he had to go back. He will come home weekends. I am just glad there is the train now. It does not take him long to go back and forth.”
She took the gift from Irene, and Irene struggled with the terrible torture of envisioning Ramon and this pretty girl enjoying their honeymoon. She could see in an instant that Anna Vallejo was a sweet, quiet young woman who would probably make Ramon very happy. “It was not necessary to buy us a gift,” she was saying.
“Yes, it was necessary. Ramon is a very good friend.”
Their eyes met. “He has told me so,” Anna said. “If you are wondering, he told me everything, Mrs. Jacobs. He said that he kept it from his first wife, and ended up hurting her. He did not want to do the same with me.”
Irene reddened a little, smiling sadly. “I see. Well, Anna, I didn’t come here to upset you. I only came because I wanted to tell you I think…I think you’re married to the most wonderful man in Denver. You’re a very lucky young woman, and I hope you will make Ramon very happy. He deserves love and happiness more than anyone I can think of.”
“Except for you,” Anna answered.
Irene’s eyes teared. “Thank you, Anna. I just…I wanted to bring the gift to congratulate you, and as an expression of how much I hope you will have good, long lives together. I truly mean that.”
“Gracias.” Anna looked down at the gift, thinking how heavy it seemed. She carefully opened it, tearing off the paper and opening a flat box. She gasped at its contents. “Oh, Señora Jacobs, it is too much!”
“Nothing is too much for the two of you.”
“Oh, my!” Anna’s eyes teared as she lifted out a golden crucifix.
“It’s real gold, Anna. I’m told that…well, one old Catholic woman told me once that if you hang a crucifix over your bed, you’ll be blessed with many children.” Oh, what torture those words were!
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