by Dawn Martens
I snuggle into his side, and he wraps his arms around me. I feel his lips touch the top of my head. “Are you sure you’re okay, babe?”
I lean my head back and smile up to him. “Yeah, I’m okay.”
He shakes his head. “I shouldn’t have lost my shit like that. It won’t happen again.”
I crawl onto his lap and sit facing him. I place my hands onto his face and lower my lips towards him. I whisper into his mouth. “Yes, you will, you will always take care of me. You’re the only person that ever has.”
I kiss him softly, but he deepens it. I feel him grow hard beneath me and grind into him. He moans and pull away from my lips. He looks right into my eyes, and what I see in his eyes takes my breath away. There is desire, but mostly it’s another emotion. It’s something I have never seen before. I’m pretty sure its love. “Thank God your mine, Rylie.”
Chapter 25
Rylie
“Mummy, can I have some milk?” I ask, sitting up at the table in the kitchen.
Mumma doesn’t say anything just goes to the fridge and pours me a glass. Wow, mummy gave me a big people glass. She never does. I always have to have the princess ones so I don’t break them.
She places the glass in front of me, without a word, and goes back to her spot at the stove.
I pick up the glass to take a big drink, when the glass slips out of my hands and crashes onto the floor.
Mum my turns around from the stove and she looks so mad at me. “I’m sorry mummy, I’ll clean it up.”
“You fucking brat.” Mummy calls me that all the time. I don’t know why, I try to be a good girl for her.
I get off my chair to start to clean up the mess when she slaps me hard. I start crying. “Shut up!” she screams at me. “Go to your room. Now!”
I run to my room crying. I’ve never seen mummy so mad before. And she hit me. Mummy never hits me. I’m in my room for a few minutes when mummy comes in with a belt. She doesn’t say anything as I look up at her.
She comes over to the bed and starts hitting me with it. I cry out.
“Rylie, baby, wake up!”
After mummy see’s that I’m bleeding she stops and walks out of my room. She comes back in with a cloth and cleans me up. “You shouldn’t have done that Rylie. Look what you made me do.” She says as I cry.
“Rylie, fucking wake up!”
I bolt straight up in bed, breathing hard.
“Rylie.” Derek says.
“I’m ok. Bad dream.”
Derek pulls me close to him, wrapping his arms around my middle. “Tell me about it babe.”
I shake my head no. He doesn’t need the poison that is me. “Derek, I think you should go.”
“I’m not leaving you.” He says firmly.
“Derek please.” I whimper.
“Rylie, I’m not going to hurt you.” Derek says tightening his hold on me. “Please talk to me.”
I let my head drop down to my chest. “I dreamt about the first time my mother abused me. I was only four. She gave me a glass of milk, and I dropped it and broke the glass, she lost it.” I say quietly as tears fall from my eyes.
“How would you feel about talking to someone?” Derek says quietly.
“You mean like a shrink?” I ask him.
“Yes, since you’ve been with me, I’ve seen you wake up from dreams of either Caleb, or now your mother. You’re not totally over this, you need to see someone.”
~***~
I am sitting in waiting room of Dr. Sharp’s office, fidgeting in my seat. I am so nervous that I just cannot sit still. Why in the hell did I let Derek talk me into doing this shit? I don’t see how talking about my life is going to help. If anything, it will just bring back all my fucked up shit. Fuck this! I am out of here. I am just walking out the door, when I hear my name being called.
Damn! Fine, I will do this once. Maybe then, Derek will leave me alone about it. I follow the receptionist back to the office and sit down to wait some more. A few minutes later, the doctor walks into the room.
“Hello, Rylie.” She says, as she shakes my hand. Then, she sits in the chair across from me. “Okay, let’s get started.”
~***~
Derek
Connor and I are eating lunch, when my phone rings. I smile, when I see Rylie’s name flash across my screen. I raise my finger to let Connor know that I will be just a second. “Hey, babe.”
“Derek.” She whimpers out.
“What happened?” I ask, as I stand up and reach into my pocket for my keys. Something is wrong and I have to get to her.
“I talked to Dr. Sharp.” She says, between sobs.
“What the fuck did she say?” I say, as I walk towards the door. Shit! I should not have made her go to that fucking doctor.
“She said that none of what happened was my fault. She says that I am one of the bravest women that she has ever met.”
I stop dead in my tracks. “Then, why are you crying babe?”
“Because, mum always said that I made my Dad do it. She said that I tried to get his attention. That, I wanted him to touch me.”
“Fuck, babe. Your mother is just a bitch! She’s also a fucking liar.”
Rylie whimpers again. “Caleb said that it was my fault that he had to beat me. He always said that if I could only learn to act like a woman should, he wouldn’t have to hurt me.”
Goddamn! I wish I could dig that motherfucker up and kill his ass again. “He was a sick bastard. Everything he did to you was wrong.”
“That is what Dr. Sharp said.” I can hear the sadness leaving her voice.
“It sounds like she is smart as hell.” I say with a chuckle.
“She may be smart, but I am lucky.” She whispers into the phone.
As far as I am concerned, Rylie is the most unlucky person in the whole fucking world. “How are lucky babe? “
“I’ve got you.”
Chapter 26
Rylie
I wake up early. Derek is still sleeping, so I just lay in the bed and think about my visit with Dr. Sharp. Talking to her has lifted this huge weight off my shoulders, one I didn’t realize I was still even carrying around. I just feel so free. I’ve even opened up more with Derek, telling him everything. The worse beatings, the first time my father raped me. He’s been so amazing with everything, with talking to me, with just being there.
When I first talked to Elizabeth and William about what my father did, they were livid. William more so, so much so actually, that he was able to have them arrested for possession. On further investigation it was also proven they made their own stuff, and sold it. However, they couldn’t arrest my father. He had overdosed just weeks after they left my home. I say good riddance. My egg donor is in prison for a long, long time. However, it hasn’t stopped her from trying to call me and from writing to me about how all this was my fault.
Once Derek found out about the phone calls and letters, his father made sure she wasn’t allowed to have any more phone privileges, and any letters written, never came to me.
Being part of Derek’s family is amazing. In fact, being with Derek is the best thing that ever happened to me. I wasn’t lying when I told him that I was lucky to have him. I look over to where he is sleeping and notice that the covers are off. It use to freak me out, but now I love that he sleeps naked. His cock is hard and ready. Maybe, I should show him how lucky he is to have me.
I sit up and pull my nightgown over my head. Then, I shimmy out of my panties. I scoot down the bed, until my face is at his dick. I reach out and wrap my hand around it. Then, I suck it into my mouth. I hear Derek moan and then he places his hand on my head.
His hips start to thrust up, sending him deeper into my throat. “Fuck, baby. Suck that cock.” He moans out.
I start to move my head faster, taking him as deep as I can. All of a sudden, he lets go of my head. He grabs my arms and pulls me up his body.
I swing my leg over him. He grabs his cock and lines it up with my pussy,
and I slide down onto him. Having him inside my mouth got me so excited, that it only take a few strokes to send me over the edge. I am still convulsing, when he flips me onto my back.
He pounds into me, prolonging my orgasm. Just as I am coming down, he reaches down and rubs my clit. I feel it start to build again.
“Derek.” I moan out.
He thrusts faster, harder. “Yeah babe, let it go.” He says through clenched teeth.
I arch up and let my release go.
“Fuck.” Derek moans as he finds his own release.
He collapses on top of me and puts his forehead to mine, both breathing heavily.
“Good morning.” I whisper out, smiling.
He grins. “Morning.”
As he slides off me, I feel him freeze. “Shit!”
“What?” I ask, sitting up, frowning.
“We didn’t use protection.” He says as he rubs his hands over his face. “Please tell me you’re on birth control.”
I bite my lip, I’ve never told him I couldn’t have children. I shake my head when he looks at me.
“Don’t think I don’t want children with you babe, I do, but we just started out. I want more us time.” He says cupping my face in his hands.
“You want children?” I ask quietly.
“Yes, I do. I want a few of them. Don’t you?”
Shit, I have to tell him. “I can’t have children Derek.” I whisper out.
He freezes. “What?”
“Caleb, he. Those scars on my stomach...” I can’t finish, it’s still hard to talk about. I haven’t even talked to my therapist about that yet.
“Fucking asshole!” he yells out.
I freeze and put my arms up to my face. “Baby, Stop that shit, you know I won’t fucking hurt you.”
I just nod and slowly bring my arms down.
“We have to break up.” I say, staring down at my hands on top of the covers.
“Why the fuck would we do that?”
“I can’t give you children.” I whisper.
“So, we’ll adopt. I was adopted, my parents loved me as if I was their own blood.”
“Derek.” I wheeze out.
“In time baby, we’re still just new. I want more time with you before we add children to this.” He stops talking, then looks at me with a huge grin. “I’m just now relieved I don’t have to waste my time putting on those fucking condoms anymore.”
I laugh and give him a shove.
~***~
Derek
Am I upset to know Rylie will never be able to have my children? I would be stupid to say I’m not, but there is just no way I’m willing to live without her. So I suggested the next best thing. Adoption. Why not? I was adopted, I love my parents. They gave me a good home, brought me up with morals, although I blew those to shit when I fucked anything that moved.
I know it was a serious moment for us, but I saw how upset she became when I mentioned having kids, so I needed to defuse the situation. I’m fucking relieved it worked quickly.
Fuck, I love this woman.
Chapter 27
Derek
Lying in bed, watching Rylie sleep. I feel like a creeper, but I can’t help it, she’s so fucking beautiful. I glide my hand over her body. Tracing the tattoos as I go. I still can’t get over how she told me she loves me tonight. Seeing the tears roll down her face as she said it. Chase and Kade, I knew they were lucky fucks. I finally have something special, the way they do. My hand makes its way down to her panty line. I remember how she woke me up the other day, going down on me, time to return the favor.
~***~
Rylie
I bolt up in bed and I hear my door crashing open. “Dad?” I ask when I see a dark figure coming in.
“Shh, Rylie dear, I’m here to make you sweet.” He says slurring. Oh no, Dad is drunk again. He used to just ignore me, but since he started drinking real heavy a few months ago, he’s been paying attention to me. And I do not like it. It weirds me out.
“Dad-” I start. Not feeling comfortable with him in my room.
“Shh, it will be ok. I’ll be gentle.” He slurs.
The hair on my neck stands up. Something isn’t right. He makes his way over to my bed and sits on in.
“Now Rylie, if you scream, or try to fight me, you’ll regret it.” He says menacingly.
He leans over me and tries to kiss me. “Daddy please don’t.” I say desperately.
“My sweet Rylie. Ten years old and already such a beauty.” He says as he slides his hand down my side. I tense at his touch. I start to cry and he tells me to shut up.
“Fuck Rylie, Wake up.”
His hands make it to my panties and he pulls them down. “Please Daddy stop.” I scream.
I sit up straight in bed. Sweating and crying.
“Rylie?” Derek whispers. “Baby talk to me.” He says pleading.
“Oh Derek. I’m so fucked up.” I say between sobbing.
“Shh, babe. It’s ok, I’m here.” He says into my hair, holding me close. “Can you tell me what it was about this time?”
I nod. “It was about my father. The first time he touched me.” I say shakingly.
His grip tightens around me. “That fuck will never touch you again. He’s dead baby.”
“I know, I thought all these trips to the therapist were helping, but it seems the more I talk about things with her, the more I dream. The dreams with Caleb finally end, but dreams about my parents are now taking over.” I say, my voice catching.
“Fuck!” Derek says, as he pushes his hand through his hair. “I’m sorry, baby. This was my fault. I shouldn’t have fucking touched you, while you were sleeping.”
I pull back and place my hands on his face. “This was not your fault. You touching me is the only thing that makes me feel whole.”
He searches my face. “Baby, I scared the hell out of you. “
I shake my head. “No, my father scared me. My dreams scared me. You have never scared me.”
He pulls me back into his body. “I promise to never give you a reason to be scared of me.”
~***~
Derek
I wait until I feel Rylie fall back asleep before getting out of bed. I make my way out and into the bathroom down the hall. I feel like shit for what just happened. God, Rylie having a nightmare about her father molesting her, and I was practically doing the same thing to her, in her sleep.
I turn the taps on the sink and take a few handfuls and throw it in my face. The more I think about it, the sicker I feel. How the hell do I move past this? How the fuck do I touch her without that shit happening again. I shake my head, because I don’t have a fucking clue. I turn away from the sink and reach for the door, but it opens before my hand touches it.
Rylie walks in, looking like I broke her damn heart. “I know what you are doing.”
“I was just using the bathroom.”
She shakes her head. “No, you weren’t, if you were just using the bathroom, you could have just used the one that’s connected to my room. You were in here trying to think of a way to let me down easy.”
I reach for her and pull her tight into my body. “What the fuck are you talking about?”
“You finally realized how fucked up, I am. So, you are going to leave. I knew it would happen. I don’t even blame you.” She says, as she chews on her bottom lip.
“I’m not going any fucking where.” I say, places a soft kiss on the top of her head.
“Prove it.” She whispers, into my chest.
I pull back and look into her eyes. “Prove what?”
She steps back and pulls her nightgown over her head then shimmies out of her panties. She crawls onto the sink and spreads her legs. She shoots me a sexy smile and runs her hands down her body. “Prove that you still want me.”
I push off from the wall, and step between her legs and pull my cock out of my boxers. I look into her eyes and thrust inside her. “I will always want you.”
Her hands
wrap around my shoulders, and I feel her fingers dig in. I slip outside of her and drag over to her full length mirror.
“Derek, wha-“ I cut her off with a kiss.
“Just watch us babe.” I tell her as I pull her back into me. “Spread your legs further.”
She does, and I bend my legs so I can get inside of her easily. “Look at us Rylie. Look at how fucking great we look.” I tell her in the mirror. I watch my dick slide in and out of her pussy. Fuck, that looks so fucking hot.
She moans and leans her head onto my shoulder. “You feel so good inside me. It’s like you were made to be there.”
I thrust harder. “I was baby. I was made to be part of you.”
I can feel her start to tighten around my cock, and I know that she is getting close. I start to thrust faster. “This is where I belong. This is where I plan to spend the rest of my life.”
As soon as the words leave my mouth, her pussy starts to convulse around me. I thrust twice more and spill myself deep inside her.
Chapter 28
Rylie
I love coming to see Dr. Sharp. Something about talking to her makes me feel better. It’s like I give her all shit that has been stored inside me forever. She just takes it and throws it all away. For the first time in my life, I don’t feel the weight of those memories.
“How did Derek feel, when you had the nightmare?” Dr. Sharp asks.
I shrug my shoulders. “I don’t know really. I think he thought it was his fault, but I told him it wasn’t. We laid there for a while. Then, I felt him leave the bed. He was gone for so long that I thought he was leaving me.”
She raises her brow. “What was he doing?”
“I think he was in the bathroom trying to figure out how to handle me.” I say.
“Handle you?” she says with a small laugh. “I am not sure that you are a person to be handled Rylie.”