by Marie Force
“Yes, Hannah,” Becky said gently, “it is. You needed permission to act on what you feel for Nolan. I’m glad I was the one you confided in and that I was the one who gave you the push you needed to make that call. It’s high time, isn’t it?”
“I suppose. It’s just that I still feel . . . I don’t know. It’s ridiculous, but it feels disloyal to Caleb.”
“Aw, honey, Caleb loved you so much. He’d want you be happy. You know that.”
“Of course I do, but it’s hard to think about moving on with someone else. I never wanted to move on without him.”
“You don’t have any choice. You’re a young, beautiful, vibrant woman with so much life left to live and so much love left to give. I can’t even begin to understand what you’ve been through, and you’ve handled it all so gracefully and with such dignity.”
“Not always,” Hannah said with a laugh, looking to lighten things up a bit. She didn’t allow herself many trips to the maudlin side of town where nothing good ever happened, but once in a while . . .
“I’m sure you’ve had a lot of rough moments, and you may continue to have them for the rest of your life. But that doesn’t mean you can’t also have other things, too, such as a wonderful, sexy guy who looks at you like you’re the cat’s meow.”
“He does not.”
“Um, yes, he does. Ask anyone.”
Every time someone said that to her, Hannah felt twitchy and off balance. She’d known Nolan forever—even longer than she’d known Caleb. He had been one of her husband’s closest friends and had served as a groomsman at their wedding. “Do you ever think that maybe Nolan is too close?”
“How do you mean?”
“He and Caleb were the best of friends. I’ve known him my whole life. He’s always been there, you know? How does that suddenly turn romantic?”
“The same way it did for you and Caleb, remember?”
As if she’d ever forget the night Caleb kissed her at the quarry and changed everything between them forever. She had to admit Becky made a good point.
“I want you to do something for me,” Becky said.
“What’s that?”
“I want you to have dinner with Nolan and not blow it up into a big freaking deal in your mind before it actually is. It’s dinner. Nothing more, nothing less.”
“If I’m to believe what you and everyone else says, it’s already way more than that to him.”
“So what? That’s his deal, not yours. Don’t take it on. Go to dinner. Eat a meal. Enjoy his company and relax. Can you do that?”
“I guess so. I can probably relax easier with him than I would with someone I just met.”
“I know you can do it. Go have a wonderful time. You’ve so earned the right to some fun and happiness, Hannah.”
Hannah hugged her longtime friend. “Thanks for the pep talk and for letting me off the hook on the sleepover.”
“Once you told me about Nolan asking you out, I was prepared to kick you out of here if I had to.”
Hannah smiled at Becky’s emphatic words. Sometimes she felt like the people in her life needed her to move on more than she needed it for herself. Up until the last couple of months, she’d been perfectly fine to rattle around in her big old house alone and to spend more time living in the past than she did in the present.
At some point over the recent winter though, she’d begun to feel anxious and lonely and perhaps ready to step foot out of her self-imposed cocoon to take a peek at what had been going on in the world while she was holed up with her grief.
After two hours of laughter and pedicures she was on the road home, her mind spinning with thoughts about the evening she’d agreed to spend with Nolan. Would it be awkward or easy? Would he try to kiss her again or would he keep his distance? Which did she prefer? She couldn’t say for certain.
By the time she pulled into the driveway twenty minutes before Nolan was due to arrive, her nerves were stretched thin. An accident on the main road into town had added half an hour to the ride. Inside the house, she used the phone in the hallway to leave a message for Hunter on his office voicemail to let him know she’d decided to come home and he was off Homer duty.
“Hey, Home Boy,” she said, using the nickname Caleb had given his dog as a puppy after the multicolored mutt had decided he belonged with Caleb. No one was really certain of his breed, but speculation ran the gamut from German shepherd to Lab to beagle. “Where are you, buddy?” Hannah checked the sitting room, where she and Homer spent most of their time, as well as the studio, where she worked and he kept a bed on the floor, but saw no sign of Homer.
At sixteen, he didn’t do the stairs on his own anymore, so he had to be somewhere on the first floor. She went into the kitchen and stopped short when she found him sprawled on the floor, his eyes open and trained on her, his distress apparent.
Hannah dropped to the floor next to him. “Hey, buddy. What’re you doing in here?” She stroked his face and back and noted the choppy cadence of his breathing and his seeming inability to raise his head off the floor. He tried to stretch his paw out to her the way he always did, but couldn’t muster the strength. Tears filled her eyes. “No, Homie. Not yet. Please not yet.” She lay down on the floor next to him, petting him as she wept.
Hannah knew she should get up and call Myles Johansen, the local vet. He’d been making house calls to check on Homer for quite some time now and had told her to call any time she needed him. Somehow she knew if she got up, if she made the call, that this time would be different.
“Oh, Homie, I’m sorry I left you today. I know you haven’t been feeling good for a long time, but you’ve stuck around because you don’t want to leave me alone. I promise I’ll be okay. Before I call anyone though . . . While it’s just you and me . . . When you see Dad, make sure you tell him I love him, and I miss him, okay? You’ll take good care of him, won’t you? He’ll be so happy to see you.”
One more minute, she told herself, sobbing as she clung to Homer. One more minute and then she’d get up to call Myles.
“Hannah?” Nolan’s voice echoed through the first floor. “Are you home?”
How long had she been lying there with Homer? She wiped her eyes with her sleeve, trying to fix the unfixable. “Back here.”
“You didn’t answer the door, so I hope it’s okay I came in—” Nolan halted in the doorway to the kitchen when he saw her on the floor with Homer. “Oh God, Hannah, what is it? What’s wrong?”
She shifted slightly to the right so he could see Homer stretched out on the floor, his breathing shallow and labored.
“Oh no. What can I do?”
“Would you mind calling Myles for me?”
“Of course. Anyone else?”
“Hunter. He’ll tell my parents. And the Guthries. They should be here.”
“Yes, yes, I’ll call them. You stay with Homer.”
Hannah breathed a sigh of relief at knowing she didn’t have to be the one to make the calls, to say the words . . . “It’s okay, buddy,” she whispered to Homer. “Everything is okay. You can go if you’re ready. I understand that you’re tired and you’ve had to live a long time without your best friend. That’s been so hard on you, but you took good care of me. Dad would’ve been so proud of you for taking such good care of me.”
She tried to quiet her sobs so as not to upset Homer. This wasn’t about her. It was about him, and she wanted to give him everything he needed.
Nolan returned to the kitchen and squatted next to Hannah. “Myles is on his way, and I left a message for Hunter. I also called your mom when I couldn’t reach Hunter. Hope that’s okay.”
Hannah nodded, grateful to him for taking charge.
“What can I do for you?” he asked, resting a hand on her shoulder. His voice, she noticed, was thick with emotion. He’d loved Caleb, too, and that mattered right now.
“This helps. Thank you.” Hannah leaned into him, resting her head on his chest as she continued to stroke Homer’s silky ears
and coat. The dog’s eyes were closed now, his breathing even more shallow, if that was possible.
Nolan sat next to her, keeping his arm around her as she leaned against him, grateful for his presence and his strength.
Preorder I Want to Hold Your Hand NOW and get it on the June 3 release day! If you haven’t yet started the Green Mountain Series, get Book 1, All You Need Is Love, available now.
Contemporary Romances Available from Marie Force
The Treading Water Series
Book 1: Treading Water
Book 2: Marking Time
Book 3: Starting Over
Book 4: Coming Home
The McCarthys of Gansett Island Series
McCarthys of Gansett Island Boxed Set
Book 1: Maid for Love
Book 2: Fool for Love
Book 3: Ready for Love
Book 4: Falling for Love
Book 5: Hoping for Love
Book 6: Season for Love
Book 7: Longing for Love
Book 8: Waiting for Love
Book 9: Time for Love
Book 10: Meant for Love
Book 10.5 Chance for Love, A Gansett Island Novella
Book 11: Gansett After Dark
The Green Mountain Series
Book 1: All You Need Is Love
Book 2: I Want to Hold Your Hand
Book 3: I Saw Her Standing There (November 2014)
Single Titles
The Singles Titles Boxed Set
Georgia on My Mind
True North
The Fall
Everyone Loves a Hero
Love at First Flight
Line of Scrimmage
Romantic Suspense Novels Available from Marie Force
The Fatal Series
Book 1: Fatal Affair
Book 2: Fatal Justice
Book 3: Fatal Consequences
Book 3.5: Fatal Destiny, the Wedding Novella
Book 4: Fatal Flaw
Book 5: Fatal Deception
Book 6: Fatal Mistake
Book 7: Fatal Jeopardy
Book 8: Fatal Scandal (January 2015)
Single Title
The Wreck
About the Author
With more than 2.5 million books sold, Marie Force is the New York Times, USA Today and Wall Street Journal bestselling, award-winning author of more than 30 contemporary romances. Her New York Times bestselling self-published McCarthys of Gansett Island Series has sold more than 1.3 million e-books since Maid for Love was released in 2011. She is also the author of the New York Times bestselling Fatal Series from Harlequin’s Carina Press, as well as the Treading Water Series and numerous stand-alone books. All You Need is Love, book 1 in her new Green Mountain Series from Berkley Sensation, was a New York Times and USA Today bestseller in February. The second book, I Want to Hold Your Hand, will be out in June, and the third book, I Saw Her Standing There, is coming in November. In 2014, Marie will have eight mass-market print releases—the first five Fatal Series books from Harlequin and the first three Green Mountain Series books from Berkley.
While her husband was in the Navy, Marie lived in Spain, Maryland and Florida, and she is now settled in her home state of Rhode Island. She is the mother of two teenagers and two feisty dogs, Brandy and Louie.
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Upcoming Appearances
Video Chat on Booktalk Nation featuring I Want to Hold Your Hand, June 5 at 7 p.m. EDT/4 p.m. PCT.
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Green Mountain Series Launch Party, June 28, 2014, Weston, VT
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Romance Writers of America 34th Annual Conference, July 23-26, 2014, San Antonio, TX.
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Romance Writers of Australia Conference, August 8-10, 2014, Sydney, Australia.
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Romance Writers of New Zealand Conference, August 15-17, 2014, Auckland, New Zealand.
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Book Signing with Nora Roberts at Turn the Page Bookstore, Nov. 1, 2014, Boonsboro, MD.
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