by Leo, Rosanna
He grunted and balled up his hands into fists. "Ah, I wish I knew, Winn. I love her, I really do, just like I loved you. And Heather, and Terri…"
"Oh, for God's sake, if you tell me there was a fourth…"
"No, no. Just the three fiancées. And each time, I was so happy, so excited, but then the wedding plans began and it all got a little too bridezilla for me."
"I was never a bridezilla."
He offered her a sad grin. "I know. You're right. You weren't. I think I'm just allergic to the idea of settling down. I enjoy dating and even living with these women, but once we start talking ceremonies and tuxedos, my heart stops pumping. I swear I can feel myself die a bit, Winn, every time I think about marrying someone."
"So why the hell did you propose three times?" Patrick asked.
"I don't know," he confessed. "It just seemed like the right thing to do at the time. But then the day of the ceremony arrives and I can't breathe. Winn, I just couldn't breathe. Can you understand what that feels like?"
She nodded, her gaze pensive. "Do womankind a favor. Just stay single, Mike. And if you start a relationship, just tell the woman you don't plan on getting married. Be honest. No one will fault you for it."
He cocked a brow. "I can do that?"
"Of course, you idiot," she replied. "What do you take us for?"
"For what it's worth, I am sorry. I just couldn't face you after I hurt you. I know I'm a coward of the highest order."
"Yes, you are, but that's no longer an excuse for you." She stood. "You are coming with us and you're going to apologize to Stacy and explain yourself."
He shook his head. "I can't. She'll hate me…"
"Oh, yes, she will. And for a long time, believe me. But at least she'll understand you, which is more than you ever gave to me. Now, on your feet, or I'll have Patrick drag you to his car."
As much as Patrick would have enjoyed the latter scenario, he watched Mike haul his sorry ass out of the booth and out of the bar. Winn grabbed his hand again and he grinned at her, so damn proud, he might have burst.
* * * *
After dropping Mike off with Stacy, and after ensuring Mr. Blair wouldn't remove Mike's head, Winn and Patrick left the church. She was glad to go. She'd seen enough places of worship to last her a lifetime and didn't ever want to be part of another wedding until Enid married one of her smitten boyfriends. Or two.
They sat in Patrick's car and she fiddled with her sequined clutch. She got the sense neither of them quite knew how to begin. So, seeing as she was now officially a badass, she grabbed the bull by the proverbial horns. "Patrick. I'm sorry I doubted you.”
He turned to her and pulled her hand onto his lap. "Oh, no. I won't listen to any apologies from you. Look, Winn. I might want to blame Jake for all of this, but I was foolish. I trusted him when I shouldn’t have." He looked at his bruised hand. "I only hope I knocked some sense into him."
“You hit him? For me?" Why did the idea give her such pleasure?
“Yeah. I think I might have broken his nose, too." He grinned. "I won't lie. Jake's pretty vain about his appearance so I really hope I broke his nose."
She ran her fingers over his reddish knuckles. "Wow. It's a good thing I didn't ask you to rough Mike up. I don't think your poor hand could take any more action."
"I'd rough up a million losers for you."
His voice, so deep and raspy, settled deep inside her, making her want. Who was she kidding? After their whirlwind relationship, after losing her heart so quickly, it had almost killed her not to be able to snuggle up to him the previous evening. Hearing how he went after the Player boss, how he defended her honor, made her wonder if they could salvage whatever they had.
He'd said he loved her. She knew she loved him.
But there was still the matter of a certain defamatory article. Was she just supposed to fall into his arms and pretend her name hadn't been tarnished for the foreseeable future?
Then again, hadn't her name already been tarnished the day Mike left her at the altar? It had certainly felt that way. After having been thrust into an uncomfortable spotlight before friends and family, she couldn't pretend it hadn't changed her life for the worse. Some people had stopped calling, unsure of how to console her. Others made ridiculous remarks, thinking they might be consoling her. And she'd stumbled through life, feeling as if a loved one had died. As if a part of her had died.
Yet she'd risen above it, in her awkward, roundabout manner.
Perhaps she could rise above it once more.
He stroked her hands, his large fingers sliding between hers. "I do love you, Winn. I know it's early days but it doesn't change the fact I'm crazy about you."
"I love you, too."
His eyes widened and the hint of a grin teased his tired features. "For real?"
"For real. But before we act on it, I suggest we take things a little more slowly. Our only dates have basically been other people's weddings. I want to make sure we haven't been carried away by all the romance in the air. I want to do this right, and maybe experience some of the steps we might have missed."
He gave her the lazy smile that featured in her every X-rated dream. "Would you like me to court you, Ms. Busby?"
She couldn't help grinning as well. "Well, considering my courtship with Mike consisted of a few beers and some quick gropes in the back of his car, I think it might be nice."
"Mental note," he whispered, as if to the little devil on his shoulder. "It only takes a few beers."
She slugged him in the arm. "You're a pain in my ass, Lincoln."
His gaze darkened with sinister, sensual promise. "Don't tempt me, Busby. I might have to shift our courtship into overdrive."
"You're such a horny bastard."
"Don't you forget it." He leaned over and kissed her on her forehead, a soft premonition of things to come. "But I'll be good for now."
She gazed at him, her womb clenching. Great. Now if only she could be good.
* * * *
"Ohmigod. Hit me with the blue one again. It makes me all tingly inside."
"If you like the texture of the blue one, you should try the one rimmed in orange. It'll have you seeing stars."
Winn reached across the table for the platter of blue cheese and passed it to Elena. "Blue, it is. It's my favorite, too. And it pairs so nicely with the merlot."
"You heard the lady," shouted Elena to Sunshine. "Pass the red wine!"
"It's coming, it's coming," replied Sunshine, filling Elena's glass for her. She giggled. "Boy, you'd think none of us had ever been to a wine-and-cheese party before."
"I haven't," said Stacy. "I've officially popped my wine-and-cheese cherry…thanks to Winn."
"Here's to our gracious hostess," agreed Amber, her glass raised. "To Winn. For bringing new and old friends together. And for showing me it's always possible to forgive."
The ladies all saluted. "To Winn!"
Winn smiled at them in turn. "Oh, stop. You'll make me cry."
It wasn’t the first time her new group of pals had almost reduced her to tears. She’d been following her grandfather’s advice a lot lately, sharing her feelings. Wearing so many goddamned hearts on her sleeves, her arms had bulked up. And they’d reciprocated, expressing such happiness at having bosom buddies in their lives.
Winn couldn’t help wondering if Margie would ever understand that feeling. After Jake’s article had been printed, the woman had experienced a decline in her stand-in bookings. So many she’d been forced to shut down that segment of her agency. Winn didn’t wish her old boss any ill, but she had to admit she was relieved to see an end to the rent-a-bridesmaid business.
"This was an awesome idea," said Sunshine, as she dipped her cracker in the artichoke dip. "I can't remember how long it's been since I got together with real girlfriends. Working as an IT geek, most of the people I speak with are online. It's so nice to see faces and not avatars."
"Is that why you chose to have a stand-in bridesmaid?" Winn as
ked.
"Yeah. But now I have real friends…watch out, bitches!”
Amber snorted her wine. She was still getting used to Winn's more colorful pals.
"What about you?" Sunshine asked Elena. "Why did you have to hire a bridesmaid?"
Elena shrugged. "Because all the women in my life are intimidated by my sophisticated beauty."
They all burst into laughter. "Uh, Elena," Winn reminded her. "Didn't you put two bread sticks up your nose a second ago?"
"I'm not responsible for my actions while drinking cheap merlot."
"Hey," Stacy cried, pretending to take offense. "I'll have you know I paid a whole eight dollars for that merlot."
"Oh, honey. Who's kidding who? I'll drink anything anyway."
Patrick chose that moment to walk through the door to Winn's apartment, carrying a couple of suitcases.
Winn flew out of her seat. "Patrick! You're home early." She wrapped herself around him and he did the same.
"I was able to grab an earlier flight. I couldn't wait to see you."
The ladies let up a collective, lusty whoop.
His face reddened. "Ladies. You're all looking spry."
"You don't know the half of it, dude," hollered Sunshine.
"I'm in trouble, aren't I?" he asked Winn, winking.
She grinned and shrugged. "You're on your own, big guy. How was the summit?"
“Great, but I’ll tell you all about it later.”
“Want some wine and cheese?”
“Nah. I ate on the plane. Besides, I don’t want to interrupt a ladies’ night.”
Elena jumped up and wiggled in her place. "The entertainment's finally arrived! Patrick, gorgeous. Do you remember Hot Chocolate's dance routine?"
"It's burned into my brain."
"Oh," said Winn. "He's much better at the Macarena. Trust me."
They all shouted. "Do it!"
Biting the inside of his cheek in clear terror, he made his excuses. "Right. This is the part where I escape to Winn's bedroom to wait out this party." He kissed Winn, avoided Elena's hands, and disappeared into the bedroom. She heard the click of the TV, and grinned, knowing tonight was the night she'd join him there.
For one, long month, they'd abstained from sex. Part of their chastity had been involuntary. As a new correspondent for the World, Patrick's first assignment had been covering a Washington summit about climate change. She'd been so excited to see him off for his new job, but had missed him like an amputee missed a lost limb. However, they'd spoken and Skype'd regularly, and she’d realized she couldn't live without him.
So, yeah, tonight was the night. He didn't know it yet, but she figured he had his own reunion plans.
She looked up, coming out of her sex-crazed reverie, and found the women staring at her.
"Winn has sex on the brain," said Sunshine. She stood. "So, this is where we all go home."
"No need to rush."
Amber cocked a brow. "Yeah, right. Did you see the look on Patrick's face when he first walked in here? That boy is hungry. And not for some moldy Stilton."
They all jumped out of their seats and grabbed their coats like one conspiratorial unit. Giggling and hooting, they took turns kissing Winn and thanking her for the evening. Sweeping out on a whirlwind of wine and loud conversation, they left.
Before she could even start cleaning up, the bedroom door opened and Patrick strode over to her, pulling her into his arms. He buried his face in the crook of her neck and she curled her hands in the front of his shirt.
"God, I missed you, Busby."
"I missed you, too. I wouldn't have scheduled the wine and cheese if I'd known you were coming home tonight."
"It's fine. I'm happy to see you having fun, even if it's with your crazy friends." He waggled his brows. "Although I freely admit Elena scares me."
"Ah, she's a pussycat, especially while on the sauce." She ran her hand over the curve of his firm shoulder. “So tell me about the summit. Was it everything you expected?”
“Yup. Politicians dragging their feet and blustery speeches.” His eyes shone. “I loved it. I already shot Joe a few columns and he’s happy with them.”
“I like Joe. He knows good work when he sees it.”
He kissed her on the nose as thanks. “Well, I might know how to write, but the best article I ever saw was Jake’s retraction in Player. Are the e-mails of support still coming in?”
“Yeah,” she said on a sigh. “At least ten a day. People really hated that piece.”
“Rightly so. Jake made a fool of himself. He was right to take a sabbatical. Readers won’t forget what he did for a long time.” He leaned over, nibbled on her neck and hummed. “How’s the book coming?”
She tipped her head, allowing him better access to her throat, and groaned. “Great. Are you ready to do some editing?”
He raised his head and smiled. “Madam, I’d like nothing better than to edit Bridesmaid. The excerpts you sent me are amazing. I had no idea you could write like that.”
“Neither did I,” she replied, her excitement producing a head rush. “But when three publishers demand your story, you do your best to give it to them.” When Jake’s retraction had been printed, including a full apology to Winn and to Patrick, she’d been inundated with requests to tell her side of the story. When a couple of publishers offered her a generous advance on royalties, effectively starting a bidding war, she’d had no choice but to think about it. When she’d begun putting her thoughts down on paper, she’d realized she enjoyed the exercise of writing, much more than she ever enjoyed the theater. And seeing as she’d resigned from Margie’s agency, she had plenty of time to craft her novel.
“Does Elena know the character of Maria is based on her?”
“Oh, yeah. And she’s made several demands already. She wants Maria to have a lot of sex.”
“Naturally.”
“Oh! Did you remember to bring Marcus the souvenir he requested?”
“Sure did. Miniature White House. I’ll give it to him when I meet him next week.”
“I’m so glad Big Brother reconsidered.”
He nodded, his eyes lowered. “Yeah, me too. I didn’t want the kid to think I’d given up on him.”
“He knew the score. Everyone knows the score now.” She worried her lip. “Speaking of which, your dad’s left a few more messages. I talked to him a bit. He seemed impressed by your work at the summit. I think he wants to apologize for how he treated you.”
He looked at the window, his eyes glazed.
“You know you have to talk to him, right? Get things off your chest. Let him do the same. You’ll feel better.”
His warm gaze returned to her. “I know. I will. So,” he murmured, his eyes hooded and dark. "In case you hadn’t noticed, I'd like to resume our courtship."
"Patrick, I think I've been courted long enough." She touched her fingers to her blouse buttons and slid the pearly buttons through the first couple of holes. She breathed in deeply, feeling the ease of unrestricted breaths. "I need you so much."
His Adam's apple bobbed. Digging his hands into her hair, he kissed her long and hard, imparting the same, fierce hunger that had her heart pumping out of her chest. He gave her blouse a less than gentle tug and the rest of her buttons popped. He stopped kissing her long enough to gaze at her nearly nude chest and grunted out a curse.
Cupping a breast, running his thumb over her bra, teasing her distended nipple, he whispered, "My beautiful Winn."
She placed her hand over his. "For so long, Patrick, I forgot I had something special to offer. I felt like the village idiot. You made me feel like a princess again."
He held her gaze for a long moment and then enfolded her in the best hug in the world. "You're my princess."
"I don't know what I'd do without you."
"You without me?" He shook his head. "Not gonna happen."
He claimed her mouth once more in a slow, lazy kiss that revved all her engines. Reaching around her, he uncl
asped her bra, slid the straps over her shoulders and let it fall to the floor. Teasing her breasts, tweaking her nipples with loving savagery, he groaned into her mouth. He touched her as if it were his first and only time making love, as if he needed to make the most of it, and she delighted in the newness and familiarity.
As his hand danced a path over her ribs, toward her mound, she sucked in a breath of anticipation. He drew small circles on her stomach and eased them between her legs, caressing her over her jeans. As moisture seeped into her panties, she ground against his hand, already impatient to come. Since he’d been away, she’d dallied with vibrators. Hell, they’d even had one steamy phone call during which he’d asked her to touch herself and bring herself to completion for him, but nothing felt as good as Patrick, live and in the flesh.
Especially when his hushed voice declared over and over how much he adored her.
He unbuckled her belt. “Jeans. Off.”
She laughed as he cursed. Each barked word illustrated his hunger and only made her hotter. After whipping her belt through its loops, he yanked at her jeans zipper. As he peeled them off her, he managed to take her panties with them. Once she was nude, he stopped moving and gazed at her, an awed smile gracing his lips.
“You got prettier while I was gone.”
“Ha. I think I put on some weight, actually. My friends and I have been eating out a lot.”
He ran a reverent hand over her hips and cupped her ass. “I like it, and I love you.”
“I love you, too. Now bed.” She nodded toward the bedroom.
“Yeah.” He picked her up and placed her over his shoulder, answering her cries of surprise with a few taps on her bottom. He walked into the bedroom and deposited her on the comforter. As he stripped, as he revealed the body she’d missed so much, Winn gave thanks for his manly beauty. But at the same time, she was grateful for his character and humor, all the traits that pulled her out of the doldrums and made her smile. He’d saved her, and she loved the idea she might have saved him, in a way, too.
Within seconds, he’d stripped nude and joined her on the bed, his luscious weight settling between her thighs. He brushed his lips against hers, once, twice, three times, and then let his tongue sink into her mouth in a deep caress.