by Marni Mann
“Your hands have only gotten better,” she said.
“They’re yours. Whenever you want them.”
She said nothing for several seconds, and then she reached for the door handle. “I have to go.”
“Samantha,” I said before she shut the door behind her, “I’m going to make this right.”
She didn’t respond. She just closed the door and went inside her building.
14
Samantha
I shut the door to Jack’s sports car and rushed into the lobby of my building, waiting for the elevator to open before I hurried inside and pushed the button to my floor. Once the door slid shut, I leaned my back against the wall and tried to find my breath.
Inhaling through my nose and exhaling out of my mouth wasn’t easy.
My chest hurt. My throat tingled.
My heart was pounding out of control.
And it was all because the last few hours wouldn’t stop running through my head.
My brain was trying to reconcile it—the dinner, the conversation.
“I want you back.”
Jack’s touch.
It wasn’t just a simple swish of his fingers, a gentle clenching of my muscles and skin.
Nothing about Jack’s hands was simple.
Because his touch wasn’t just physical. It triggered emotions; it induced memories. Ones that made me smile, ones that made me want to cry.
Having him back created a whole new set of challenges that was almost as scary as not having him here at all.
As I’d sat in his car, silence building between us, my hand on the seat belt and the other on the door, I’d wanted so badly to tell him what was on my mind. To say the words, so they’d stop eating at me.
But something stronger had consumed me, and that was the need to have his fingers on me again, to have his lips on mine without pushing them away.
And, now, I was hit with the aftermath, a whole new set of feelings.
Ones that were filling my eyes.
Ones that I wasn’t even close to processing yet.
But I couldn’t stay in here to do that, not with the elevator door sliding open to my floor.
So, I walked to my condo and put my key in the lock. Once I got inside, I immediately saw Anna in the living room, cuddled on the couch with a blanket over her.
The TV was on.
The scent of chocolate chip cookies was in the air, which I knew she’d made from scratch. They were Lucy’s favorite, and Anna would do anything for her.
“How’d it go?” she asked.
I kicked off my heels and left them by the door.
“What’s the face for?” She lifted the blanket, signaling me to come over and join her. “Are you crying?”
I hurried to the couch and snuggled into her side.
“Samantha, talk to me; you’re starting to freak me out.”
I used the blanket to wipe my cheeks. “I’m just having a minute.”
She turned off the TV. “You’re allowed to have as many as you want, but you can’t keep them a secret. Tell me what’s going on in that little head of yours.”
“Jack…obviously.”
“Did something happen?”
I exhaled, the heaviness still very present in my chest. “He told me he wants me, and he apologized for the way he ended things. Then, we sorta hooked up in his car.”
“You say that like it’s a bad thing.”
I sat up a little straighter, so I could look at her while I said, “Isn’t it? I don’t know. I’ve never been this confused in my life.” I touched my chest, trying to ease it. “No, I take that back. I was this confused when Jack cut me off eight years ago.” I leaned across the couch to the end table where I grabbed a tissue out of the box. “It’s like he has a rope around me, and whenever he pulls, I turn into this crazy lunatic.”
“I wouldn’t call you crazy or a lunatic. I would say Jack’s the man you’re supposed to be with. He’s your person, Samantha. And you’re feeling this way because you care about him so much.”
I gave her a side-eye.
“What? He is.”
“I don’t know.”
“Are you really going to tell me you don’t have feelings for him?”
I could still feel his hands on my body. My heart still hammered away at the thought of him, at the way his lips had pressed against mine. At the sound of him telling me he wanted me.
“No, I can’t say that.”
“I didn’t think so.”
“Even when I dated other men, I think Jack was always in the back of my mind.”
“Girl, you’re not telling me anything I don’t already know.” She adjusted the blanket, so it covered more of me. “Where do things stand now?”
I balled the tissue in my hand and wiped the last drips from my eyes. “He wants to have dinner when he gets home from Nashville.”
“Ah, what the hell is he doing there?”
“He’s meeting with Shawn about work stuff, but he’s also going to talk to Shawn about dating me.”
“You’re fucking kidding me.”
I shook my head.
Anna got up from the couch and walked into the kitchen, grabbing a plate of cookies and setting them on the ottoman in front of us. She took two, handing me one and keeping the other for herself. “This is huge. You realize that, don’t you?”
My stomach couldn’t handle the idea of more food, so I put it back. “It brings things to a different level.”
“And you’re scared to death.”
I wrapped my arms over the blanket. “I don’t love the idea of Shawn and Jack talking about me, so that’s one part of it. The other part is that I don’t even know if I can trust Jack. What if I give him everything, and he leaves me again? I don’t think I can handle going through that a second time.” I tried to still the quivering that was happening inside my chest. “I want things to move slowly, and it feels like we’re in fast-forward.”
“Listen to me.” As she shoved the rest of the cookie in her mouth, she pulled my hand into her lap and eventually surrounded it with both of hers. “This isn’t something you can control. You just have to follow your gut and keep an open mind, and everything will fall into place.”
“And stay guarded.”
She squeezed my fingers. “And don’t be guarded. If you face him with a shield, how do you expect him to find your heart?”
“You’re too much right now, you hopeless romantic.”
“Samantha”—her voice softened—“you’re getting everything you ever wanted. Jack doesn’t seem like the same man he once was. He sounds like he’s grown into someone really amazing. Just take things one day at a time. If you do that, you’ll be fine.”
“God, this is so messy.”
“It’s really not.” She rolled her eyes as though I were being the dramatic one. “It’s just been two years since you’ve been with a man, so you’re a little out of the game. I won’t judge you for it.”
“Anna, we both know my situation isn’t typical.” I tried to take a breath; the tightness was strangling me again. “That means nothing about a relationship with Jack will be typical.”
“Ah, you mean the Lucy section of the equation. Do you think—”
I shook my head and cut her off with, “We’re not talking about it.”
“Samantha—”
“I can’t go there yet.”
I stood from the couch, dropping my tissue on the ottoman, and I moved toward the hallway.
“Where are you going?”
“To kiss Lucy good night. I’ll be back in a minute.”
I needed a break.
I needed silence.
I needed to keep that door closed for as long as I could.
Discussing it with Anna would only get me more worked up, and that was the last thing I needed right now.
I quietly tiptoed into Lucy’s room and climbed onto her bed, lying in the small space next to her. With her back to me, I pressed my nose into her
hair and inhaled the scent that was so unique to her.
My baby girl.
Every decision I made affected her, including whatever happened with Jack.
I closed my eyes and took a breath, trying to fight through these feelings. When I opened them again, I put my lips against Lucy’s head. I felt the tears well up. I felt the tightening, the confusion, the worry, and the fear.
And then I whispered, “Oh God, baby. What have I done?”
Jack: I can still smell you.
Me: I thought you licked it all off.
Jack: I mean, your perfume. I can smell it on my suit. But I like where your head is, and yes, I did lick it all off.
Me: Naughty man.
Jack: Good night, gorgeous.
15
Jack
Me: I’m headed to Nashville to meet with Shawn. I’m finally going to tell him the truth about Samantha.
Brett: Damn.
Me: I’m done hiding it. I like her, and her brother needs to fucking know.
Brett: That’s my boy. Lay it all out there.
Me: I don’t want him to think I’m choosing between the two of them. I can handle both as long as he can.
Brett: He won the Super Bowl. I don’t think he has anything to complain about right now.
Me: Am I nuts to do this?
Brett: Any one of us would do the same. That’s why we’re best friends and business partners. We go after what we want. We don’t fuck around.
Me: Let’s hope he doesn’t tackle me.
Brett: He’s a tight end. What does he know about tackling?
Me: Good point.
“Jack Hunt,” Shawn said as he got closer to the table at a restaurant he’d told me to meet him at during my flight. He made his way around the booth, reaching down to clasp my hand and slap me on the shoulder. “It’s good to see you, my man.”
I could smell last night’s booze on his breath. Not that I was surprised. I’d talked to him after I got back from having dinner with Samantha, and he was out drinking with his teammates. Hell, if I’d just won the Super Bowl, I’d have been doing the same. He’d worked hard for that championship, and he deserved to party his ass off.
“It’s good to see you, too. You’re doing all right?”
He sat down across from me. “Never better.”
The waitress immediately came to our table, dropping off two coffees and two waters, both which I’d ordered before Shawn arrived. “I’m going to give you guys a minute to look at the menu,” she said. “Can I get you anything in the meantime?”
I shook my head. Shawn did the same.
“Congrats on the win,” she said before she walked away, wearing the biggest goddamn smile on her face.
“Are you getting a lot of attention?” I asked him once we were alone.
“You have no idea.”
I didn’t, and I was thankful for that. There were days when I wondered how Brett did it, constantly getting his picture taken whenever he was with James in LA. That was a life I didn’t want.
He nodded toward the folder that I’d placed next to me on the table. “You’ve got some good numbers for me?”
My assistant had printed out every offer that had come in over the last few days, and I’d reviewed each one along with the terms of the contract, so I could explain them in detail.
He had some serious decisions to make.
Ones that would financially set him up for the rest of his life.
But, before we talked money, I had to get this thing with Samantha off my chest. This conversation had been weighing on me the whole fight here, and I didn’t want to wait any longer.
“There’s something I need to talk to you about first,” I said.
I wasn’t a nervous person. I went into business meetings confident as hell because I knew the industry backward and forward, and I dared anyone to challenge me. I had a law degree, and I considered myself an expert negotiator.
But, as I looked into the face of one of my very first clients, I wasn’t feeling so sure of myself.
This was personal.
This was his fucking sister.
He lifted his coffee and took a sip. “Your walking papers had better not be in that folder because there’s no way I’m letting you quit.”
I wondered if he’d still say that once I told him what was on my mind.
“I’m not going anywhere.”
“Then, what’s going on?”
I left the coffee alone, but I filled my mouth with water, and then I cleared my throat. “We need to chat about Samantha.”
“Samantha?” His brows rose. “You mean, my sister? What about her? Is she in trouble or something?”
“We’ve been talking.”
He laughed, and that surprised the hell out of me. “If you’re thinking about making her into an athlete, you’re going after the wrong sister. Samantha didn’t play any sports in school. The girl has no aim and even less coordination. Stacey is the only other athlete in my family. She got a golfing scholarship, and she could have gone pro, had she wanted it badly enough.”
Jesus Christ.
“Shawn, I don’t want to represent your sister. I want to date her.”
As the seconds passed, it looked like my words were finally starting to sink in.
“Oh, shit.” He continued to stare at me. “You want to date my sister.”
“I’d like to, yeah.”
“Have you spent a lot of time with her?”
I couldn’t get a read on him. He wasn’t acting pissed, but he wasn’t acting pleased either.
“Yes,” I answered.
“How long have you guys been talking?”
“Not long.”
That wasn’t a lie since we hadn’t really done much talking eight years ago.
Not that I’d ever mention any of that shit to him.
“I respect you, Shawn. So, before things go any further between Samantha and me, I wanted to discuss it with you.”
It looked like he was still processing the news, still unsure of how he felt about it. “I like that you came to me, and I appreciate it.”
I wanted him to know that Samantha wasn’t just someone I’d talked to at the bar and decided I wanted to hang out with. I was coming to him because I wanted to take things to a deeper level.
“Shawn, your sister is a hell of a girl. She’s patient and sweet; she’s understanding and forgiving. She works as much as I do, and you know how important that is, given how often I travel.”
“I know.”
“What I’m trying to say is, I care about her. Enough that I’m coming to you, my client and my friend, and I’m putting our professional relationship on the line because your sister’s worth it.”
His lids narrowed, his stare intensifying. “All right, I can see it now.”
“You can?”
“Yeah, man. It took me a second, which is probably due to all the shit I drank last night, but yes, I can see the two of you together. She’s a great girl; you’re a nice guy. You both live in Miami. The fit makes sense.”
Motherfucker.
All that buildup for nothing.
“I want her to be happy,” he said. “So, I’ve got no problem with it.”
I shook my head, sighing, relieved that we’d made it through that conversation.
“But, Jack, I’m going to warn you about something right now.”
I’d thought I was in the clear.
Sounded like I’d thought wrong.
“If you hurt Samantha or Lucy, you’ll have to answer to me.”
Lucy?
I stared at him, waiting for an explanation to follow. When one didn’t come, I said, “Who’s Lucy?”
“Who’s Lucy?” He laughed much harder this time. “You’re serious?”
“Yeah, I’m serious. Who is she?”
“Lucy is Samantha’s daughter.”
Samantha’s daughter?
No way.
It wasn’t even fucking possible.
&nbs
p; I’d heard him wrong.
“What did you say?” I asked.
He leaned his elbows on the table. “Lucy’s her baby girl and my niece.” As he stared at me, his expression began to change. “Shit, she didn’t tell you.”
I couldn’t believe he was talking about the same fucking woman I had fingered in my car last night. About the woman I had texted before I went to bed. About the woman I hadn’t been able to get out of my mind since I saw her at his Super Bowl.
I shook my head.
“I didn’t mean to be the one to break the news,” he said. “I’m shocked she didn’t tell you. That little girl is her whole world.”
I tried to calm my voice, masking the anger that wanted to come through. “I’m sure she is. What about the dad? Is he still in the picture?”
Shawn shook his head. “Nah.”
I didn’t even know what the fuck to say.
I didn’t understand why Samantha hadn’t told me or why she was keeping her daughter a secret.
Or if this news was going to change the possibility of us having a future.
“My niece is a massive part of my life,” he said. “I’d do anything for either of those girls, and I’m extremely protective of them. So, you’d better be good to them, Jack.”
I looked at the mug of coffee and at the half-empty glass of water, wishing like hell they were full of something stronger.
And then I finally glanced at him. “I hear your message, Shawn. Loud and clear.”
Me: She has a fucking kid.
Brett: Who?
Me: Samantha.
Brett: She just told you that?
Me: No, her fucking brother told me. Samantha hasn’t said a goddamn word about it.
Brett: Jesus. There must be a reason she didn’t tell you.
Me: Whatever her reasoning is, it’s bullshit.
Brett: Go pour yourself a drink.
Me: And then what?
Brett: And then don’t call her because that’s a conversation you should have with her in person.
I left the hotel bar and stumbled up to my room. I’d spent the last few hours there, drinking scotch and watching the Rangers destroy the Bruins. I represented New York’s starting right wing, and during the second period, he had been taken in the locker room for a lower body injury. I’d already put a call in to the team doctor, both trainers, and the player’s wife. I didn’t expect to hear anything until after they got the results of the X-rays, which would be within the hour.