by Karen Bell
Standing there in the dark, Mila peered into the street below. She recognized the cars of her neighbours. All were familiar save for one car with an interior light on, parked a few houses down. From her position above, she couldn’t see much of the person inside. But she turned to look at her bedside clock now reading 12.45 a.m. Late to be sitting in a parked car on a weeknight, she thought. Whoever it was may have been waiting to pick up a daughter from a babysitting job or was maybe just checking a street directory. Mila shivered and ran back to bed dragging the covers up to her chin.
Five minutes later, she willed herself to stop fidgeting. Robert had hated her fidgeting when he was trying to sleep. Worse still, letting on that she was still awake was excuse enough for him to force himself upon her. Many times Mila had ignored the desire to scratch, cough, roll over, or re-adjust her pillow, quietly praying that he’d leave her alone. Just one night, that didn’t begin and end with his erection forced inside her.
Strangely, lying still usually did help her to fall asleep. She likened it to swaddling a newborn to help them settle.
Only sex helped Robert with insomnia.
Now Mila lay still and nearly dropped off, when she was roused by the unfamiliar barking of a dog. What the hell, she thought, sitting up with frustration and looking at the clock. So close to sleep. Forty minutes had passed so maybe she had dozed after all.
Getting up to look out the window again and to find the source of the commotion, she saw no sign of a dog, but that car, was still in the street with the light on. Now Mila was nervous. What if someone was watching her house? What if they were looking for another opportunity to break in! Her imagination ran wild with hypotheses. Maybe one of those deranged men that Robert had brought home had found out he was dead. Maybe that was the voice on the answering machine. What if one of them thought they thought they could come in and take over where Robert had left off. Mila felt the chill of iced water freezing in her veins.
Grabbing the card that was on her bedside table, she began hammering out a text message. She had only owned a mobile for six weeks. It was something that Robert had never permitted her to have, so she was not practiced at messaging, and progress was slow. Rushing to find each tiny key in the dark only caused her to fumble more and she didn’t dare turn on another light.
‘Sorry- to-wake- u- but I think someone’s-outside-watching my-place. I-don’t-feel-safe. Should-I-call 000?’
Within seconds the reply came back, startling her with the buzz. ‘No don’t do that. It’s me outside. Can I call you to explain?’
What? ‘Yes please do.’ Where was the damned exclamation mark when you needed it? The phone rang, startling Mila yet again.
‘Hi it’s me. I’m sorry, you must think I’m some kind of stalker. Jack and I had to get out of our house. Chemicals from a pesticide treatment. They don’t agree with him.’
Mila was mystified and then a little disappointed. Sergeant Ryan Blake was gay? His lover was sitting in a car with him outside her place? Who would have thought.
‘Jack is your …partner?’ She asked searching for the politically correct term.
‘Yes. Well no… well not any more. He was, but we retired him a couple of years ago.’
Just as she tried to make head or tail of that piece of information, a loud bark in her ear made her leap a foot off the bed.
‘Ah, so Jack is your dog,’ she exclaimed, as it began to fall into place.
‘Yes.’
‘And he used to be your partner.’
‘Yes.’ His relief was audible.
‘And you couldn’t stay at home because the pesticide smell upset him?’
‘Yes – he was trained as a sniffer dog and he has heightened olfactory awareness.’
‘And you are outside my place because ….’ Mila paused, waiting for an answer.
‘Because I can’t very well take Jack to a hotel or leave him all night alone in the car and well…I was concerned for your safety,’ he finished.
‘Not half as concerned as I was, with a stalker outside my window.’ replied Mila with some humour and more than a little relief too. Secretly, she was delighted that he was parked outside her home. ‘Well now that we’re all awake, can I bring you a cup of tea?’ she asked hopefully. Then remembering she hadn’t made it to the shops added, ‘But I haven’t had the chance to buy milk yet.’
‘Oh no, you should be asleep. Jack and I will be just fine. This isn’t our first stake-out together.’
‘Well I’m sure I heard Jack asking for a cup of black tea about fifteen minutes ago. In fact I’m sure that’s what woke me up.’
‘Actually he was asking for a piece of black cat that ran across the road and up a tree.’
‘Well I don’t need any more bad luck after today, so better you than me.’ Mila was gratified to hear easy laughter by way of reply. ‘Goodnight then Sergeant Blake, I feel much safer now that I know you and Jack are protecting the neighbourhood.’
‘Please, call me Ryan when I’m off duty at least. Sweet dreams Mila.’
‘Good night… Ryan,’ she whispered with a smile.
Mila was still smiling twenty minutes later when she gave up on sleep altogether and pulled on a dressing gown and slippers before padding down to her front door and out into the street. She stood patiently outside his car window as he lowered it sheepishly. ‘Will you and Jack please just come inside and spend the night on my couch? It’s not like any of us are going to get any sleep anyway. You might as well be comfortable and I will certainly feel safer.’ As she said it, Mila marvelled at the fact that although he was virtually unknown to her, she did feel safe in the company of this man.
‘Really it wouldn’t be appropriate for me to come in on my own.’
‘Well you’re not really on your own are you? You’re with your partner and anyway you’re off duty. I insist. How could I sleep in my two storey home while you spend the night cramped in this car before starting another eight hour shift.’
‘Twelve hours,’ he corrected. ‘Police shifts are generally twelve hours long.’
‘Well that decides it then. Stop arguing will you so that I can come in from the cold.’ Mila was impressed by her own show of muscle.
The car door opened, and Sergeant Blake resignedly climbed out, unfolding himself, to his full height, which was head and shoulders above hers. Jack, a shorthaired German shepherd clambered across from the passenger seat and climbed out after him before yawning and stretching in the streetlight.
The three of them walked silently back to the house, pausing so Jack could relieve himself on a hedge. It was an awkward moment that had them both laughing when the flow stopped and started for about thirty seconds.
‘Sorry, he’s got prostate issues and he’s not used to peeing in front of women.’
Finally inside, Mila insisted on making them a hot drink and getting a bowl of water for the dog. The policeman went to follow her into the kitchen with Jack at his heels like a shadow. ‘Stay,’ he commanded with the gentlest of authority and the dog dropped dutifully to his haunches.
‘How do you take you tea? Other than without milk,’ she asked.
‘Two sugars,’ he answered. I drink my tea and coffee black anyway but a man has to have some small vices. Mila nodded. It made a nice change from control freak Robert who had counted every calorie that went into his body and hers.
She turned to fill the kettle at the sink and as she did so, was aware of his presence behind her. She felt her skin bristle momentarily and turned to see him helping himself to two mugs from the cupboard as though he’d lived there forever.
‘How did you know where to find them?’ she queried.
‘Above the kettle,’ he answered. ‘Ninety percent of people keep their coffee mugs with their tea and coffee above the kettle. Another fascinating piece of trivia brought to you by the NSW Police Department.’
‘So where’s the sugar kept Smarty Pants?’ she challenged.
‘Well that would be with the te
a and the mugs if there’s room,’ he answered while opening the next cupboard along and taking out the tea and the pot. ‘Or, if the occupants don’t take sugar themselves, it’ll be in the pantry if they’re casual, but in your case I’d suggest it will be with the good tea set in the living room.’
‘Full marks,’ she laughed retrieving the sugar bowl from the living room sideboard. ‘My husband only drank tea from a pot, English parents, and you’re right, we don’t take sugar. Well didn’t,’ she corrected herself awkwardly.
‘Mmm. It says a lot about a man.’
‘What’s that supposed to mean?’ she replied with mock indignation.
‘Just saying,’ he grinned back cryptically.
The kettle whistled loudly. ‘Saved by the bell,’ commented Mila. ‘I don’t think I liked the direction that questioning was heading.’
Mila caught herself enjoying this middle-of-the-night banter. She felt a little intoxicated, which was possibly the result of being in the company of such an attractive man, but more likely the result of extreme over-exhaustion coupled with a lot of unspent adrenalin that had been racing around her body since returning home.
They moved to the living room and Sergeant Blake stood, waiting for Mila to sit down. Caught off guard, she dropped to her knees at the coffee table and went to pour the tea.
She didn’t notice the off duty police officer look down at her quizzically before sitting himself down. With a nod in Jack’s direction, the dog trotted over and dropped at his feet.
Without a second thought Mila too sat on the floor in front of the adjacent armchair. He looked over and his eyebrows furrowed ever so slightly. This time she didn’t miss it.
Mila jumped up and sat awkwardly on the edge of the seat and as accustomed, waited for him to speak.
‘So,’ he began, ‘like me, you don’t have family in Sydney?’
‘What made you think that?’ she enquired, with tilted head.
‘Well, you said you had no one to stay with tonight, but you mentioned you have a daughter who’s in Melbourne currently so I thought she might be staying with grandparents for a few days.’
‘Sounds like you’ve added two plus two and come up with five,’ she laughed. ‘Not very thorough investigative work considering you’ve had… oh… seven hours now. Actually, my parents in-law live down the road, but they’re elderly and I don’t like to disturb them; my daughter is grown up and studying in Melbourne and… my own parents passed away two years ago in a car accident,’ she added more quietly.
The poor guy looked for a moment like she’d hit him with a truck but he recovered quickly. ‘I’m really sorry Mila, I wouldn’t have brought up open wounds on top of what you’ve just gone through if I’d had any idea. It sounds like you’ve had a lot to deal with.’
‘Well I’m getting by, though I’d have to admit that I fell into a pretty deep black hole when my parents passed. It sounds odd, I know, but it’s so much harder when you don’t have a chance to say goodbye.’
‘It doesn’t sound odd to me at all. Actually I have a fair idea. My father passed away just six months ago from a massive heart attack. Fittest guy you’ve ever seen one minute, gone the next. We were pretty close but I moved away when I was seventeen and lost a lot of years finding myself before really reconnecting. Now it’s too late,’ he added with a shrug that belied the obvious depth of his emotions.
‘Was he very old?’ Mila asked.
‘He was eighty-four, but like I said, fit as a Mallee bull. I’m the youngest of six: four sisters and a brother so he was nearly fifty when I came along.’
‘Wow. That’s a big family.’
‘I think my folks were hoping for more sons to help run the land. And well there’s really not that much to do in the country of a night-time,’ he added with a twinkle. ‘As much as I loved the land, the dogs, the motorbikes and of course my family, I couldn’t wait to see what was out in the big smoke. When you’re young and single, being stuck in the middle of nowhere just feels so remote.’
‘That’s kind of how I felt when we first arrived in Australia from the Ukraine,’ Mila agreed thoughtfully. ‘Bendigo isn’t so remote but to me it felt a million miles from everything I knew. I guess that’s one reason I stayed so close to my parents, even when we moved to Sydney. That, and I suppose being an only child. My parents were older too, when I came along,’ she added by way of explanation.
‘So how is it that you’re old enough to have an adult daughter? You honestly don’t look older than about twenty-five yourself.’
‘It’s a long story but I did start very young. Holly wasn’t planned but she…’ Mila paused, ‘she’s been the light of my life.’
‘So why stop at one?’ he asked.
That question’s a bit impertinent don’t you think for someone who’s known me for about seven hours?’ Mila feigned indignation.
‘Sorry, I guess that was a little out of line. But it’s all part of my police investigator training. And correction, it’s seven days and seven point five hours,’ he countered, referring to the meeting in the police car park without saying as much. ‘To be honest, I’m just curious. Coming from a big family I’ve always had siblings there for me. You just seem like a really warm person who might have liked more kids.’
‘I would have loved more children,’ reflected Mila with just an edge of sadness, ‘but my husband Robert thought that one was enough. Unlike me, he was happy to be an only child.’
‘Well I guess it’s not too late for you,’ said Sergeant Ryan brightly, ‘most women your age are just starting their families.’
It was Mila’s turn to ask questions. ‘So Mr ‘big family lover’, how long are you planning to leave it before starting a family?’
‘I’m sterile Mila,’ he answered, with a deadpan expression.
‘Oh I’m so sorry!’ she gasped, mortified to have put her foot in it so badly.
‘Gotcha,’ he laughed. ‘No actually I wouldn’t know if I’m sterile but I wouldn’t think so… although I’ve often wondered why not one of the hundreds I’ve slept have come back for alimony yet.’ Again with the poker face but this time Mila threw a slipper at him. Though it wouldn’t have surprised her if there was a half-truth to his joke; if he had slept with a hundred women. She’d seen him in uniform!
‘Actually even though I’ve only known you for seven days, seven hours and forty-two minutes,’ he said looking at his watch ‘I feel like I’ve known you for at least a fortnight and that I can share with you that I too, married young. My wife Caroline and I were planning to have a large family but then my partner – my police partner I mean – was shot and killed and my wife decided that maybe it wasn’t the safest environment in which to bring up kids.’
This time Mila knew he wasn’t joking. She said nothing, but the empathy etched in her expression was enough to draw him further.
‘So, we spent the next couple of years with her trying to convince me to leave the force and me saying no, until eventually we drifted apart and went our separate ways. I didn’t blame her. I was pretty messed up for years after the shooting. I had a lot of anger and a lot of guilt. Eventually she stopped wanting to be around so much negative energy and she wanted a family of her own.’
‘That must have been a really painful time in your life,’ Mila responded, eyes full of compassion.
‘It was, but we speak from time to time and she’s happily married with two beautiful kids and a third on the way. I still have a few good years left in me too and I won’t be in active duty forever. I’ve been offered desk jobs, detective jobs but I really like being out in the community and I get the chance to juggle it with more complex cases. Jack and I did ten years of drug squad and compared to that, what I do now is a picnic.’
At the mention of his name, Jack jumped up, wagging his tail, and then realizing he wasn’t leaving, sat back down and laid his chin on his master’s lap. Mila could well appreciate the look of adoration in his wise old doggy eyes. He stroked the dog’s
head and scratched behind his ears and Mila was mesmerized by the rhythm of the firm, but tender touch. Jack responded as Mila might have, by hooking one paw over his master’s wrist so he wouldn’t stop.
Sergeant Blake looked over and caught Mila’s eye. ‘Soooo, do you think you might be able to get a couple of hours shut-eye before daybreak?’
‘Actually I think I might finally be able to sleep,’ Mila stifled a yawn. ‘Will you two be okay snuggled under this quilt?’
‘That depends.’
‘On what?’
‘Were you snuggled under it earlier this evening?’
Mila nodded self-consciously.
‘Well in that case we’ll be more than happy.’
When Mila slipped into her own bed a few minutes later, she was asleep in a millisecond. Not since she was a child, had she slept so well, so peacefully. She woke to the sound of the kettle whistling in the kitchen below, feeling as though she’d slept for a month.
She had a five second shower, brushed her hair and cleaned her teeth before trying on three outfits in a matter of minutes. She settled on a pair of white tapered pants and a casual turquoise top, both of which Holly had insisted she buy for the cruise. As she came down the stairs, she caught the smell of something delicious frying on the stove. It was still only seven a.m. and he was showered and dressed in perfectly pressed uniform with her apron tied around his waist.
‘If you want me to take you seriously, you’re going to have to lose the apron,’ she started. ‘Did you actually sleep at all? My fridge was bare and you’ve miraculously produced… eggs, mushrooms, spinach, and toast,’ she said peering over his shoulder. ‘The corner store doesn’t even open until seven. Did you break in?’ she suggested.
‘Well my old friend J-a-c-k,’ (he spelt the letters out to avoid exciting the dog), ‘woke me up at 0600 for a pee because it had been a whole three hours since his last one, so I decided to grab my clothes from the car and take a shower – I hope you don’t mind I used the one in the laundry – then, I thought J-a-c-k would need a little w-a-l-k if he’s going to be cooped up all day at the office, and while we were out, we noticed the old Italian green grocer pulling up to the store, so we asked if he wouldn’t mind serving us.’