by M. D. Massey
“Lita, I have a question. Since Fallyn and I are mates, can I start calling you ‘mom,’ now?”
“No, druid.” The goddess casually examined her fingernails as they transformed into rather long and very sharp claws. “Not unless you wish to die a rather abrupt and very messy death.”
10
“The longer I’m here, the greater the danger to the Pack. So, let’s get all the bullshit out of the way,” I said as I leaned on the breakfast bar with both elbows. “Lita’s pissed because I abducted Fallyn and returned her memories to her. That’s why she’s here. But she can’t very well take her back to her werewolf prep school after she’s just supplanted her father as alpha to the Pack.”
“Please, don’t call it that,” Fallyn’s mother said. “And yes, I am very upset that you enlisted the help of a god or goddess to breach the wards I’d placed around our facility. Moreover, I suppressed Fallyn’s memories of you for good reason, and it wasn’t your place to undo that very delicate bit of work.”
“You mean brainwashing,” Fallyn interjected as she gave her mother a hard look. “Don’t you think I should’ve had some say in it? It was bad enough to go through—well, the incident with Dermot. But to have my own mother rob me of a year’s worth of memories?” Fallyn’s expression turned from distaste to disgust. “Ugh. I feel like I was victimized twice.”
“You were unconscious when I arrived, exhausted and in shock after fighting the demigod’s influence for days on end,” the goddess said. “Your father and I felt it was best to remove any memory of that experience, at least until your mind had time to heal.”
Fallyn crossed her arms over her chest. “Mother, a few months would’ve been plenty of time to recover. You could’ve returned my memories ages ago, but the fact is, you were both trying to keep me away from Colin.”
“Hey, don’t drag me into this,” Samson said. “My only concern was to keep you out of danger. Once I turned you over to Lita for safekeeping, she was in the driver’s seat.”
“Then why’d you refuse to tell me where Fallyn was for all that time?” I asked.
Samson cracked his neck, rubbing it out as he answered. “Orders from the boss, kid. We don’t do it often, but when an alpha exerts the full weight of their influence, there’s not a lot a subordinate can do about it.”
“I call bullshit on that,” I replied. “You’re dominant enough to resist. I saw that earlier today.”
Fallyn cut us both off with a chop of her hand, addressing both her parents as she spoke. “Enough with the bickering. You both were complicit in this little scheme to break Colin and me up, and hell if I’m going to stand for your crap any longer.”
“Oh? And what were we to do?” her mother said in an icy tone. “Were we to simply allow this—what did you call him, Samson?”
“A shit magnet.”
Lita gave a single, emphatic nod. “Yes, this shit magnet to continue to endanger our only daughter?”
Fallyn clenched her fists at her sides, leaning forward as she growled her response. “I’m an adult, Mother, and you have no fucking right to intervene in my personal affairs like this. It’s my right to choose my mate—me, not you. Well, I chose him. Believe me, I did not make that choice lightly.”
“Oh, do tell,” her mother replied skeptically. “Tell us what makes this reckless young man such an ideal mate for my daughter, who could very well be the future Alpha Prime? Tell me why I should allow you to couple with someone who has earned the ire of half the Celtic pantheon? Why should I allow my offspring—and my people—to be dragged into a war with the gods?”
Fallyn replied through clenched teeth, her jaw working overtime as she seethed. “I thought that’s what we did, Mother—fight wars. Isn’t that what you’ve been training me to do for the last seven months?”
“Yes, dear, but for profit and power, not personal vendettas. And we choose our contracts carefully, so as not to be drawn into their political schemes and machinations.”
I pushed off the bar, waving my hands back and forth. “Whoa, hold up—I rescued you from mercenary school?”
Lita fixed me with an impatient, heavy-lidded glare. “Yes, one that has existed for centuries, in fact. In Europe, our kind nearly died out during the Inquisition. After facing near-extinction, I set up an organization to protect therianthropes from persecution. But such pursuits require money and resources—thus was our organization born.”
“That’s badass,” I mused, snapping my fingers. “Question time. Do you have secret handshakes and stuff? Do you get a callsign when you join? Do you wear ninja suits on night missions? Can I join and get-learn-do any or all of the above?”
“Perhaps your questions would best be left for another time,” Lita said as she looked at her daughter. “Obviously, your father and I acted in your best interests, but in so doing we violated your trust. I for one don’t want to lose the ground I’ve gained with you over the past months, so please tell us what we can do to make amends.”
“I second that, Pipsqueak,” Samson added. “You can’t blame your old man for trying to keep his daughter safe. So, throw us a bone, eh?”
Fallyn addressed each of them in turn as she rattled off her demands. “First, you will not fuck with my memories, ever again. Are we clear?”
“Crystal,” Samson replied.
“Noted,” her mother said. “What else?”
“From now on, you two are going to butt out of my love life,” Fallyn added through clenched teeth.
“Oh, I suppose,” Lita conceded with an indignant wave.
“Agreed, unless the knucklehead screws up,” Samson said.
“Dad!”
“Alright, alright. I’ll back off,” the old werewolf replied.
Fallyn’s eyes narrowed as she looked back and forth between her mother and father. “And finally, you’re going to watch from the sidelines while I get some good old-fashioned revenge on those Celtic fuckers.”
I raised my hand sheepishly. “Um, I may have already killed all the guilty parties involved in your abduction.”
Fallyn gritted her teeth. “Fine, then I’ll just have to settle for helping you get revenge on whoever’s left.”
Considering what she’d been through, she’d probably never forgive me if I said no. So, I’d have to agree, for now. Later, I’d figure out a way to keep her away from Badb and Fuamnach. Doing it without her knowing? Well, that was another matter.
“Fine by me,” I said. “But if the shit really starts to hit the fan and I think you’re in danger, your safety is going to be my number one priority.”
“It had best be, druid,” Lita said. “Because if anything else happens to my daughter, I’ll hold you personally accountable.”
“I’d expect no less,” I said, meaning it. “And just so you know—if I ever get a callsign, I call dibs on Maverick.”
Lita’s eyes narrowed, and I couldn’t tell if she was amused or annoyed. Honestly, I didn’t care. It wasn’t every day you got to tweak the nose of a goddess.
Fallyn grabbed my hand in a somewhat awkward manner, but the contact was welcome just the same. “Mom, Dad, I need one last favor.”
Samson stepped toward her and gently placed his hands on either side of her face. “I know, you two have some catching up to do. Don’t worry, your mother and I will hold the fort down while you’re gone.” He kissed her on the forehead, and then he took a step back. “Take care of my little girl, druid.”
“I will. And when we get back, I’m going to need some answers about what else you, Luther, Maeve, and Finnegas have been hiding from me all these years.”
The old alpha frowned. “Eh, go see Luther. He’s the guy to give you the answers you’re looking for.”
“Why do I feel like you’re giving me the run around?” I asked. Samson smirked like he was in on a joke I missed. “Alright, be a dick then.”
With that, I took us to the Grove.
The first thing I heard when we arrived in the Grove was my mother bellowing at the sky.
“You bring my son here right now or send me back to Earth. Or I swear by Balor’s good eye that I’ll burn this place to ash. You hear me, you overgrown drus?”
Fallyn and I shared a look that spoke volumes about our tangled parental relationships. Chances were, she felt more comfortable knowing she wasn’t the only one with an overbearing, disapproving mother. Still, I’d prefer to avoid airing out my family’s grievances in front of my only recently recovered girlfriend.
“Give me a minute,” I said softly. “I’d like to calm her down before you two meet.”
“It sounds like she’s super-pissed,” Fallyn said with a teasing grin. “Good luck with that.”
I left my mate to her own designs and tromped off across the Grove to find my mother. Unlike my reunion with Fallyn, which I welcomed despite the strange circumstances, this rekindling of my relationship with Mom was the last thing I needed right now. Having her around—and remembering who she truly was—had dredged up all sorts of buried emotional baggage that I didn’t even know I had.
Dad might have passed when I was young, but with him, it was always easy. He supported and encouraged me no matter what. But in Mom’s case, there was never a time when I felt like she approved of me. And the more I thought about it, the more I discovered how much I truly resented her for all the rejection and derision I received from her when I was young.
I had more than enough time to mull that over as I homed in on her voice. By the time I reached her, I was more than a little worked up, and not at all in the mood to hear her complain. As I stepped out of the trees and into the clearing where she paced, ranting and raving at my Grove and Oak, I couldn’t help but wonder what I’d done to deserve such a fucked up childhood.
“Mom, settle down. They aren’t going to listen to you, and you damned sure aren’t going to get anywhere by trying to set my Grove on fire. In fact, it’s probably a good way to get launched into the Void without an atmosphere.”
“So, you finally show up after trapping me here in your sanctuary? It’s been days since you left, you know. Didn’t you think I’d wonder where you were?”
Massaging my temples, I counted to ten before speaking. “Mom, there’s a major time differential here, so I was only gone a few hours in Earth time. Now, are you trying to say you were worried about me or something? Because if you were, just say it instead of doing the passive-aggressive mothering thing.”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” she said, crossing her arms and staring down her nose at me. “If you can’t look after yourself, you’re no son of mine.”
I threw my hands in the air in frustration—this interplay was so very reminiscent of my early childhood. “You see? That’s what I’m talking about. You can’t bring yourself to show even the slightest bit of concern for me. And when you’re threatened with revealing even an iota of emotional vulnerability, you lash out with ugly remarks. Seriously, I have no idea why Finnegas lifted that stupid geas. I’d be better off thinking I had a mother who actually cared.”
Mom opened her mouth as if to speak, then she stopped herself. I knew how these games worked, so hell if I was going to try to fill the silence just to appease her. I wasn’t ten years old anymore, after all. Instead, I stared and waited for her to speak first. After a minute had passed, I finally gave up and stormed off.
“Son,” she said as I exited the clearing, “if I didn’t care, I wouldn’t be here.”
At that I spun around, fixing her with a harsh look. “You know what? I did just fine for a decade without you, and hell if I need your bullshit now. When you’re ready to act like a mother instead of a drill sergeant, we can talk. But until then, leave me be.”
“Colin, wait—”
I snapped my fingers and sent her back to Earth, back to our house in Farmersville. Badb was probably long gone, so chances were good she’d be safe there. And if not, well—if she can’t look after herself, she’s no mother of mine.
I found Fallyn sitting in the grass near my Keebler cottage, soaking up the magical sunshine while she awaited my return. She opened her eyes on hearing my approach and chuckled at the set of my shoulders and the sour expression on my face.
“I take it that went well,” she said.
“Is it that obvious?”
“Mm-hmm. For one, I could hear you yelling all the way over here, even without werewolf hearing. And second, you look like you just took a slug of spoiled milk.” She patted the grass beside her. “Sit.”
Instead, I paced back and forth, gesticulating as I aired my grievances. “I just don’t understand why Finnegas lifted that geas. Wasn’t I better off believing I had a relatively normal mother? Heck, Maureen was more of a mom to me than Leanne ever was. Do you know that she never showed up for anything? Not baseball games, not school plays, no award ceremonies, nothing. It was always Finnegas and Maureen…”
My voice trailed off as my gaze fell on the old man’s maple tree.
“Colin, where is Finnegas?”
Like a dam breaking, all the emotions I’d suppressed over the last several days came crashing over me. Breaking down in tears, I fell to my knees, wracked by grief and sorrow. “He’s gone, Fallyn. I fucking failed him. After all I did, all that time, everything I’ve learned and done, I couldn’t save him.”
Despite the awkward distance between us, Fallyn wasted no time in coming to my side and wrapping me up in a warm werewolf embrace. “Oh, Colin, I’m so sorry,” she said, rubbing my back as I sobbed and sobbed on her shoulder.
Minutes passed, and instead of holding it all in like I’d been doing for so, so long, I let it out—all of it. I cried ugly, releasing all the heartache I carried with me for losing my dad, then Jesse and Uncle Ed, for Elmo’s death, for alienating Sabine and failing in my relationship with Bells, for nearly losing Fallyn, and for spending years of my childhood under the care of a harsh, disapproving mother.
It was painful, it was difficult, and it was something I’d needed to do for a long, long time. The truth was, I hadn’t felt safe enough with anyone to bare my weaknesses and vulnerabilities, not until Fallyn had returned. And I hadn’t realized just how much I needed her trust and support until this very moment.
“I missed you so much,” I said through the tears.
“Same,” she replied. “Although I didn’t know it. But I do now. The whole time I spent training with Mom and the other alphas, there was this hole inside me. I couldn’t put my finger on it, and I had no idea what was missing. And all that time, it was you.”
I wanted to kiss her, but my nose was running, so I turned and wiped it on my sleeve. “Sorry I’m such a mess.”
“Hey,” she whispered, taking my chin in her hand and turning my face toward hers. “You’re my mess, and I love you all the more for it.”
Despite how emo I felt, I couldn’t help but crack a crooked smile. “You said it.”
“You said it first, dork,” she said, tweaking my nose. “Aw, gross, I got your snot on my fingers.”
“Yeah, maybe I should go clean up before we continue this conversation.”
“Nope, no need. I’m a ’thrope, and gross is what we do. Hell, you’ve seen the Pack hunt and feed. After you’ve fought with a couple of your friends over a pile of deer guts, there’s not much that’ll turn your stomach.” She stood, pulling me to my feet. “C’mon, I know just the thing to fix you up.”
Fallyn ran off, pulling me behind her for a few steps before she released my hand. Then, she began peeling off items of clothing as she ran toward my favorite bathing spring. By the time she reached the pool she was buck naked, and the sight of her athletic body taking an unnaturally high swan dive into the water did wonders for my state of mind.
It wasn’t long before I’d joined her in the water. Soon, we floated together, face to face in an embrace. Considering the idyllic surroundings, the magically perfect weather—not to mention water temperature, as it was warm enough to prevent shrinkage—and the way we made goo-goo eyes at each
other, it could’ve and should’ve felt hokey. But it didn’t. Instead, it felt like my world, or at least this little corner of it, was right for the first time in a very, very long time.
We made love, obviously, during which time I was reminded of the advantages of dating a werewolf. Not gonna lie, I had to stealth-shift to keep up with her, but we were both dealing with seven months of pent-up sexual frustration and longing. Eventually, though, even our supernatural stamina gave out. We concluded our marathon love-making session lying next to each other next to the swimming hole, panting and basking in the afterglow.
I reached over to entwine my hand with hers. “No way I’m losing you again.”
“Feeling’s mutual, Golden Boy.”
Turning to face her, I propped myself up on an elbow. “Fallyn, why me? You could’ve had your pick of any male werewolf—hell, any alpha—from every pack across the continent. But you went for the most complicated, fucked up guy you knew. Why?”
She gave a contented sigh, covering her eyes from the Grove’s perpetual noonday glare as she replied. “You’re not as messed up as you think. And I chose you because you’re the absolute best person I know. I fell in love with you because no matter how bad things go for you, and despite the many truckloads of bullshit life continually seems to dump at your door, you always put other people first. And you are always trying to do the right thing, even when it’s not in your best interests.”
“I—okay, wow.” I chewed a blade of grass as I digested what she’d just said. “Thank you.”
“Plus, you’re not half-bad in the sack,” she added with a mischievous grin.
11
Fallyn and I spent what seemed like weeks in the Grove getting to know each other again, while taking time to work out our separate issues as well. Slowly but surely, the atmosphere between us went from slightly awkward to comfortably stable. As the days spun on, we learned to simply enjoy each other’s presence once again. The bond between us grew, but I knew we couldn’t hide out in the Grove forever.