Jenn ducked her head. Yes, those teachers protected the lives of many, but they missed some. She watched parents pull their children closer and noticed some of the teachers in the crowd who were surrounded by loved ones.
Yes, they were heroes. Even though her son hadn’t been protected, her daughter was still alive. She had to remember that. She needed to remember that.
“Principal Stone, it was due to your bravery and dedication to protecting our children that more lives were not lost. This town can’t thank you, or the wonder team of teachers and staff at Stillwater Public, enough. Same with our mayor. The way you took charge afterward, how you handled the press and stepped in to ensure this town survived through those first few days and then weeks . . . well, I know you won’t come up so we can thank you properly”—Charlie frowned at them—“but I hope that this little piece set at the bottom of this amazing tribute tells you how we feel about you.”
Charlie knelt down and pulled off the cloth covering the black marble base. There was an etching on there that couldn’t be seen, so Charlie read it out.
“For the bravery, dedication, and love you have provided, Stillwater Bay will never forget those who stepped forward to protect our own. Even in death.”
Jenn couldn’t stop the tears from falling then. Even in death. She knew that was meant to honor the two teachers who’d been shot to death as they stood in front of their students.
Charlie was right. The way Jordan and Charlotte had stepped up . . . it was not only heroic but . . . life changing. Jenn felt guilty for lambasting her friend for not caring and placing the needs of the town ahead of everything else.
It was Jordan who’d caught Gabriel Berry’s attention and stopped the spree of bullets from killing more lives.
It was Charlotte who had taken charge when everyone else couldn’t.
And it was Jenn who’d pushed her friend away, not realizing just how wrong she’d been.
“I need to find Charlotte,” she said to Robert.
“Why?”
“I just do.” Jenn pushed her husband’s arms away and made her way through the crowd. She found Charlotte, standing next to Lacie.
Jenn stood in front of her friend and placed her arms around her, giving her a tight hug. She squeezed, not wanting to let go, and was relieved when Charlotte’s arms encircled her.
“I’m so sorry,” Jenn whispered into her friend’s ear.
Charlotte strengthened her embrace. “You have nothing to apologize for. Nothing.”
“Thank you,” she said. She turned and reached for Jordan’s hand and squeezed it. “Thank you,” she repeated.
Jordan’s face was pasty white, and his pupils were dilated. She wasn’t even sure he’d heard her; it looked like he was struggling to contain a panic attack.
“Jordan?”
He moistened his lips and blinked a few times before he was able to respond.
“Please don’t. Don’t thank me. Please,” he croaked. His jaw tensed, and he wouldn’t look her in the eye. Charlotte mouthed don’t to Jenn, asking her to leave whatever was happening alone.
But she couldn’t. It didn’t feel right. Except . . . somehow she knew if she pushed Jordan, he’d fall apart. She could see it in his eyes. His hands were fisted together, and his skin was clammy. Why? What was wrong with him?
“You need to get it together; people are coming.” Charlotte laid her hand on her husband’s shoulder, and from the way her fingers went white, Jenn knew the grip was tight.
It took a few seconds, but the look on Jordan’s face changed. Gone was the panic-stricken man somehow affected by the ceremony, and the principal this town knew and loved returned. His body became erect, his shoulders pushed back, and a slight smile appeared. He still didn’t look at Jenn but instead focused on Charlie, who had stepped down to talk with him.
“Is everything okay?” Jenn asked Charlotte.
Charlotte watched her husband, concern evident from the way she studied him. “I don’t know. I just . . . I don’t know.”
Lacie stepped up and linked her arms through both Jenn’s and Charlotte’s.
“I don’t know about you girls, but I could use some girlfriend time. Obviously not today, but how about this weekend? Does Sunday work? We can grab Shelley and maybe head to that inn just down the coast and go for brunch?”
“On a Sunday?” Jenn asked.
“Yes. On a Sunday. I don’t want to be here when Scott leaves for the church. Please?” She glanced over her shoulder at her family. “Run away with me, even if it’s only for a few hours?” she pleaded.
The pleading did it for Jenn. Something was happening to Lacie, something that went beyond just the regular issues of a pastor’s wife. Over the past month, Jenn had been so lost in her own grief, she’d forgotten that there were others around her experiencing the same loss. She’d been so angry with Robert for making her wear a mask that she’d forgotten she wasn’t the only one in the public eye who had to pretend they were okay.
“It’s a date.” Jenn didn’t wait to see what Charlotte would say.
Relief swept over Lacie’s features. “Thank you,” she said. “Thank you.” She turned back to her husband, who had called her name.
Robert stood a few feet away from Jenn and waved. She waved back. She saw a brief glimpse of what their future could be as long as they stayed united, as a team. But could they?
She sure hoped so.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
CHARLOTTE
Jordan paced the length of Charlotte’s office multiple times before he managed to calm down. Charlotte waited at the little table she had in her office and watched him.
Truth be told, she was actually a little nervous.
He’d bolted from the crowd after the unveiling of the amazing statue up to her office once people started to come their way. He’d managed to shake a few hands and make small talk with a few individuals, but that had been it. He’d left her standing there, with no explanation or excuses, until the crowd had thinned enough that she felt she could check up on him.
“I can’t do this anymore,” Jordan muttered. He ran his fingers through his hair, messing it up even more than it already had been, and dropped into the seat opposite of her.
“Can’t do what?”
He wouldn’t look her in the eye; instead, he dropped his head into his hands and leaned over until he was bent over his knees.
“Jordan, talk to me. Please.” She scooted to the edge of her chair and placed her hand on his knee.
“I can’t do this. I can’t. It’s eating away at me, and I feel like I’m about to lose myself.” He raised his head and his bloodshot eyes alarmed her. Her hand squeezed his knee involuntarily.
“Jordan,” she said, her voice firm and full of authority, “I need you to focus. Tell me what is going on.”
He stared at her before he sat up straight and placed his hands in his lap.
“This isn’t something you can fix. It’s not.”
“Not if you won’t let me try.” She saw a tiny glimmer of hope in his eyes at her words.
He stood up and went to the window, pulling aside the curtains to look down at the street below.
“I’m not who they think I am.”
That didn’t make sense to her. “Who are you then?”
He was silent for a few minutes. She wasn’t sure he was going to respond, but then she heard the words she never thought she’d ever hear from him.
“I’m a coward.”
“No you’re not.” She couldn’t believe he’d even say that. If there was one thing Jordan was not, it was a coward.
“I am. I didn’t save anyone’s life, and in fact, I may have been more responsible for their deaths than I thought.”
This time Charlotte was the one to stand.
“What are you talking about? Of course you�
�re not responsible. Didn’t you hear them today? You saved lives. It was you, Jordan, who stopped Gabe Berry in the end. You.”
Jordan crossed his arms over his chest as if hugging himself.
“No.” He swallowed hard. “I lied to you. I lied to the police . . . to everyone. I wasn’t there.” A pained look crossed his face. “I wasn’t there to talk down Gabe. Not at first, anyway.”
“Then where were you?”
She couldn’t imagine what he had to say could be as horrible as he was making it out to be. Had he been in a classroom trying to calm the students? Had he been in the office protecting his staff? Where could he have been that was so horrible?
“I was hiding.”
Charlotte let out the breath she held in. Okay, that wasn’t so bad. She would have hid as well once she heard the first gunshot.
Jordan looked out the window, his palm touching the glass.
“I’m not a hero. I’m a coward. A coward who hid in his office closet the moment he heard the first gunshot.” His palm slid down the glass, leaving streak marks. Charlotte concentrated on the lines of those marks, knowing they would be forever marked in her memory. “I hid. I didn’t rush out and help any of the students find a safe place. I didn’t barricade a classroom door so no one would come out. I didn’t face down Gabe and attempt to calm him down.” His voice hitched, and in that moment, Charlotte saw him as a weak man.
“But . . . you did see Gabe? You told me you did. You were there when he killed himself. You told me . . .” Her voice trailed off, suddenly unsure if anything he’d told her had been the truth or not.
A movement to her left caught her eye, close to the door that was partially closed. It had been closed, right?
“Wait,” she said. She got up and went to close the door, but first, she opened it slightly and listened. A low murmur of voices echoed off the walls below as people gathered. Had someone come up to her office and heard Jordan’s confession? She hoped not. Oh God, she hoped not.
“I don’t want to hear any more,” she said once the door was closed. She breathed in deep, her thoughts overloaded as she thought of what to do next. Now was not the time for her husband to bare his soul. Not here and certainly not now. Not when they needed to leave and join those crowds.
“But . . .” Jordan slumped against the wall. “I need to tell you. I need to tell you the truth.”
“No.” She held up her hand to stop him. “What you need is to man up. If you need to have a nervous breakdown, fine. But not here. Go home, have a long shower, and try to relax. I’ll join you later, and we can talk.” She grabbed her purse and slung it over her shoulder. “Right now, to this town, you are a hero, and I refuse to let you change that.”
“But I need . . . I need to tell you about Gabe. About what he said.”
She shook her head. Hearing this was not what she needed. How dare he do this to her now with everyone below. Why couldn’t he have trusted her in the beginning? He should have told her the truth then, whatever the truth was, and they could have dealt with it together. But now . . . to unload on her now . . . in the middle of the town fair and after the ceremony? No. She couldn’t do this. Not now.
“What I need is for you to get your act together. When we walk out of this office, I need you to be the principal everyone believes you to be. That’s it. You need to smile and look calm and go home. I’ll see you later, and we can figure out what to do next.”
“But you don’t know—”
“Jordan, I swear, if you tell me now, I will lose it. Right now you will pull yourself together and act as if nothing is wrong. Tonight you can tell me, and we will figure out how to fix it. Whatever it is. But not now.” She stopped him from saying more. She wanted to know what had him so freaked out, but not here. After a moment, she held out her hand and waited for him to take it.
She knew that whatever he was about to tell her, it would change their lives forever. She knew it, deep in her heart. She wasn’t sure why today was the catalyst for Jordan’s change of heart, but it had obviously been too much for him.
She thought about how he’d run earlier at the first mention of the ceremony and how she’d found him in Julia’s backyard with tears in his eyes. Something had happened in those few moments, something he hadn’t wanted her to know. Her teeth ground together as she struggled to focus. She pushed every other thought out of her head as Jordan clasped her hand and they walked out of her office.
A round of applause broke out as they made their way down the stairs, and Charlotte squeezed her husband’s hand while plastering a smile on her face. She wasn’t sure why people were down there, waiting for them, clapping for them. But when she saw little Ellie Thomlin standing at the bottom of the steps holding a bouquet of flowers in front of her, she knew.
She knew the moment Jordan noticed Ellie. His hand shook in her grip, and he almost tripped.
“Ellie, honey.” Charlotte bent down until she rested on her heels once they hit the bottom of the stairs. Jordan stood there, at her side, frozen. “These are beautiful,” she said to the little girl.
“For you and Principal Stone.” Ellie held out the bouquet, and Charlotte took them from her hands before offering them up to Jordan. Once he took them, Charlotte held out her arms and hugged the little girl tight.
“Thank you,” she said to Ellie.
Charlotte nudged Jordan with her elbow in his knee, and he bent down with a grunt.
“These are very pretty, Ellie. Did you pick them out yourself?” he asked her. His voice was wooden, but Ellie wouldn’t notice.
“Mommy helped.” Ellie glanced up at her mom. “I wanted to say thank you for saving me.” Her lips trembled at the words.
Charlotte blinked away tears that gathered in her eyes, and she knew Lauren, Ellie’s mom, did the same.
Jordan shook his head before he took Ellie’s hands in his own. He cleared his throat a few times before he could respond.
“Oh Ellie.” He bit his lip and glanced at Charlotte out of the corner of his eye. “I’m not a hero. You are. I know you didn’t think I noticed, but I saw how you were there for your friends, giving them hugs and telling them everything would be okay. I saw you, Ellie Thomlin. For what you did afterward, how you helped your friends and the way you help your mom every day, to me, you’re the real hero.”
Jordan leaned forward and placed a gentle kiss on Ellie’s forehead before he stood up and reached for Charlotte’s hand. Then, just before they went to walk out of the building, he handed the flowers to Charlotte and reached for Ellie’s hand.
“What do you say us heroes go get an ice cream cone?” he asked Ellie.
The smile on Ellie’s face, the way Lauren’s shoulders relaxed, and the forced ease in Jordan’s voice told Charlotte everything would be okay. For now.
Like Jenn, she held on to this moment and prayed it would last.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
JENNIFER
The crowd from the ceremony slowly dispersed, Jenn and Robert amongst them. They didn’t say much as they walked mindlessly down the sidewalk and across the street. Jenn felt a little overwhelmed and was attempting to let it all soak in.
Up ahead was Still Blooming, and Paige was outside handing flowers to people as they walked by.
“I’m sorry I haven’t bought you flowers in a while,” Robert said.
Jenn rolled her eyes. “It’s not like we haven’t had enough flowers in our house, Robert.”
“Yeah, I know.” He shrugged. “But none of them are from me.”
Every week Robert used to bring her home a bouquet of flowers she would place in an antique water jug they’d picked up years ago at a garage sale.
“Maybe you can start again,” she suggested. She’d never said it, but she’d gotten so used to him bringing flowers home that the meaning had been lost. One more thing she’d taken for granted in their marriage.
“I think I will.” He leaned down and placed a kiss on her lips.
“All right you two, that’s enough,” Paige teased. She held out a bright-orange gerbera to Jenn.
“These are beautiful.” Jenn loved the vibrancy of the flower.
“It’s my last orange, but your daughter asked me to specifically keep it for you.” Paige set the basket she’d held in the crook of her arm down on the stool beside her and gave Jenn a hug.
“She did?” Robert asked. “We just left her at the town hall.”
“I think she took off with Amanda,” Jenn said. She didn’t remember saying good-bye to Charity or seeing her leave, but no doubt the kids had their own plans for the day. She would have liked to spend more time with her today, especially after the ceremony.
“The girls just stepped inside there.” Paige pointed to the Treasure Chest, which Jenn hadn’t noticed earlier. Its door was held open by a sign letting customers know it was open again.
“She’s in there?”
Paige nodded.
Jenn stared through the open doorway to find her daughter, but she wasn’t able to see much past the crowds of people inside. Charity wasn’t supposed to be in there working; she thought that had all been cleared up.
“Do you want to wait out here for a minute?” she asked Robert. “I want to talk to Charity and find out what’s going on.” At his nod, she squeezed past two women who were coming out of the store, their arms loaded with bags full of items.
“I was so worried this shop wouldn’t be open; this is the highlight of my trip every year,” one of the women said as she passed Jenn.
The store was packed. Displays of homemade crafts created by Stillwater artisans and other local vendors filled the tables and walls, and she was amazed at the transformation.
“Hey.” Charity appeared in front of her. “I thought you’d still be at the town hall.” She dragged Jenn out of the store, with Amanda following after them, and bumped into Julia, who stood outside with Camille, Paige, and Robert.
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