He laughs, throwing his head back. His scalp gleams in the overhead lights. “You are, aren’t you? I wouldn’t blame you. She’s sexy in a bossy kind of way.”
“I’m not sleeping with her,” I say through my teeth. “I wouldn’t cheat on Bailey. I’m not like you.”
He quits laughing, but that smile is still on his face. “Yeah, you’re right—you’re too much of a Boy Scout. But be honest: you hit that, right?”
My mouth sets into a straight line.
“That’s what I thought.” He smacks his knee. “Hey, I got a question for you, Walsh. Does Bailey know you go out of your way to request shifts with a woman you used to sleep with?”
Shit, how does he know about that? I can think of several people who know I request to work with Claire, and any one of them might have blabbed. But it isn’t a big secret. I request Claire because she’s an incredible nurse. It has nothing to do with our past, which is irrelevant.
“There’s nothing between me and Claire,” I say as calmly as I can. “Absolutely nothing.”
“You must be blind then,” he says, “if you don’t see the way she looks at you. And she’s always touching your arm. She doesn’t act that way around any of the other doctors. You think nobody notices the way she flirts with you?”
“You have no idea what you’re talking about.”
He snorts. “Don’t worry—I won’t tell Bailey. I owe you one, after all. And we’re practically family.”
I grab my wheel to spin back to the computer. I need to get him out of this ER. If he doesn’t, I’m going to have to switch jobs.
“Anyway.” Theo stretches his arms over his head and yawns. “I guess I’ll be seeing you at Lily’s recital, huh?”
That gets my attention. “You’re going to Lily’s recital?”
“Of course I’m going—Lily is my daughter.” The right side of his mouth curves upward. “Bailey didn’t tell you she got me a ticket?”
A vein throbs in my temple. I know he’s baiting me. I’m not going to show him he got to me.
Be strong, Walsh. He’s just a douchebag.
“Lily told me it was important to her that her father be there for the recital,” he goes on. “So I said, ‘Lily, you want your dad there? I’m there.’ So I’m going to be there, front row and center.”
I respect that he’s showing up for something so important to Lily. But at the same time, I wish he weren’t coming. It was supposed to be just me and Bailey in the audience. Now we have to deal with her ex-husband?
But what can I do? Theo is Lily’s real father, and she wants him there. And as much as I care about Lily, I’m not her father and I never will be.
Chapter 29: Bailey
I was worried the drive to Lily’s dance recital might be tense. After all, Noah was less than thrilled to discover Theo would be coming. But he’s in good spirits as we travel uptown to the high school where the recital is being held. He’s even humming along to the radio.
Lily chatters excitedly the whole while, intermittently patting the tight bun on the back of her head. We had a bit of an argument this morning because she wanted to wear makeup, but I think she’s far too young, even if the makeup is just for a recital. We finally compromised on lipstick only, and Noah made a big deal out of how pretty she looked.
Noah looks pretty good himself today. He told Lily we were all dressing up for her big day, and then he put on a nice blue dress shirt that made the blue in his eyes look even more intense. Every time I look at him, I get a little flutter in my chest. It’s totally worth it to have to put on a dress myself, rather than the jeans and sweater I wore to her recital last year.
When we get to the high school, Noah immediately pulls into the handicapped spot without hesitation, even though he’s got his prosthetics on. He doesn’t even consider parking anywhere else anymore. He has his new sockets now, which is part of the reason for his good mood, but he’s still limping more than he used to a year ago. When we get out of the car, he grabs his cane from the trunk.
Lily races ahead of us, eager to get to the recital. “Hey,” I say to Noah when she’s out of earshot.
He smiles at me. “Hey yourself.”
“I just wanted to say thanks for being so cool about the whole Theo thing.”
“Of course,” he says. “He’s Lily dad. What kind of jerk would I be if I said he shouldn’t come?”
You’d be like Theo. I don’t say that though. I try not to badmouth my ex-husband—it’s tacky.
As if I hadn’t spent enough money on dance classes, costumes, and three overpriced tickets (Theo still hasn’t paid me back for his), the lobby of the school is littered with more people asking for money. I can buy a T-shirt for Lily, advertising the dance school for only thirty bucks (forty for the sweatshirt), roses for five bucks a pop, and various leotards and shoes and other dance-related products. The class itself is not that expensive, which is how I got sucked in two years ago. It’s the hidden costs that get you.
“Can I have a rose?” Lily asks hopefully.
Noah raises his eyebrows at me. He’d buy her one, but I don’t like her to think she just has to ask for something and she’ll get it. Before Noah came along, she would have assumed I didn’t have the money to shell out for something like that, but my finances have been in better shape lately, so I can’t blame her for trying.
“Sorry, Lily,” I say.
“But all my friends have roses!”
“Maybe after,” I say vaguely. She’ll surely have forgotten about it by the end of the show.
I’m worried Lily is revving up for a tantrum. But before that can happen, her eyes grow wide at something she spies across the room. She jumps about a foot up in the air and shouts: “DADDY!!!!!!!”
She races across the room as fast as she can go in her little pink sneakers and hurls herself at Theo, who is standing near the entrance to the auditorium. He hands Lily a rose he apparently purchased while he was waiting here. Her face flushes at the site of the rose.
“Daddy!” she says happily. “I need you to meet my dance teacher! And Arianna. And Leah. And Priya. And Crystal. And Jaclyn. And…”
Theo gamely goes along with Lily as she pulls him around the room, showing him off. This is exciting for her, because Theo never shows up to stuff. I’m fairly sure most people at her new school think Noah is her dad, and I haven’t bothered correcting them. It’s sweet, but at the same time, I’m worried Noah must feel hurt. He helped me get Lily ready for the class. He brought her to at least fifty percent of the lessons. He drove us here. But now she’s acting like he doesn’t exist.
“I guess we’re off the hook,” he says with a crooked smile.
“You sure you’re not upset?”
“Nah. I’m happy for her that he came.”
He’s got to be lying. But he’s not acting upset, so I’m not going to push it.
After a few minutes, a giggling Lily returns to us with Theo. He looks like he’s about to shake Noah’s hand, but at the last minute, holds back. “Lily introduced me to everyone,” Theo says. “I feel like a celebrity or something!”
Noah’s jaw tightens so imperceptibly, I’m certainly the only person who notices.
The show is going to start shortly, and there’s an area downstairs where I’m supposed to deliver Lily and her second costume and her change of clothes/shoes. That said, I’m hesitant to leave these two men alone. Not that I think they’ll get into a fistfight if I leave, but… well, it’s not out of the realm of possibility.
“Noah,” I say, “why don’t you find us some seats?”
He gives me a thumbs-up. “Sounds good.” He winks at Lily. “Can’t wait to see your performance.”
Lily rolls her eyes. “I just did it last night in the living room!”
“Yeah, but this is onstage. With your friends. Completely different.”
Lily giggles and rolls her eyes again. I take her by the hand and lead her downstairs, filled with regret about Theo and Noah being left al
one together. Okay, a fistfight is unlikely. But I’m fairly sure nothing good can come of this.
Then again, they work together. I’m sure they can behave themselves.
Pretty sure.
When I get downstairs, we find the large room full of antsy girls, ranging in age from three to preteen. Before I even step into the room, three kids in succession nearly collide with me. This place is a mob. Lily’s table is all the way in the back, naturally, so I have to pick my way through a room full of costumed little girls and nearly trip over five backpacks before I get to her table.
Elise is already there with Arianna. The two girls embrace like they haven’t seen each other in ages, instead of just yesterday at the bus stop. Elise, who was messing with Arianna’s hair, lets out an annoyed grunt when her daughter pulls away.
“I’m trying to get her hair right, but I give up,” she sighs. “I don’t know how to make a French braid. I’m sorry, Arianna.”
Except Arianna is too excited about Lily showing up to care. Good thing, because I’ll be of absolutely no help with the French braid.
“So.” Elise raises an eyebrow. “That hottie Lily was introducing to everyone… that’s her father?”
I nod.
“Whoa,” she breathes. “That guy is sexy.”
“Uh…”
She laughs. “Well, he’s not as hot as Noah. I mean, Noah… damn. But he’s got that grungy look. You know how to pick ‘em, Bailey.”
“Theo might be hot,” I concede, “but he’s not a great guy.”
“Well, he seems to have a good relationship with Lily.”
That’s true. Even though Theo has disappointed Lily many times, she still adores him. But that’s only because she doesn’t know better.
“So his name is Theo, huh?” Elise muses. “Is he… single?”
“Elise!”
“Sorry, sorry. I just don’t meet many men, okay?”
I could be pissed off but I’m not. Before Noah came along, the idea of meeting any guy, much less a nice guy, seemed impossible. So I understand Elise’s eagerness. But at the same time, she doesn’t want Theo. Not really. Even if I didn’t end up with Noah, I wouldn’t have regretted leaving Theo. He wasn’t a good husband or father. And no matter what he says, that will never change.
Chapter 30: Noah
“So where should we sit?”
I shoot a look at Theo. He’s got his hands shoved into the pockets of his jeans and his eyes are darting around the room. Parents were not required to dress up, but I wore a dress shirt and khaki slacks because I felt like it would be disrespectful to show up in jeans and a T-shirt. Bailey absolutely agreed.
“We?” I repeat.
He grins crookedly and rubs at his bald scalp. “Sure, why not? We’re all friends, aren’t we?”
Is that what we’re pretending? Fine.
Theo picks out some seats all the way in the last row of the auditorium, even though there are plenty of seats near the front. “This way we can duck out if we need to,” he says.
“I’m not ducking out.”
He snorts. “Yeah? You know this is going to be three hours of little girls bumping into each other to music, right? You don’t think you’re going to be desperate to leave after an hour?”
He’s got a point. It will be awful. But I can sit through it for Lily. I’m not going to sit all the way in the back.
We finally compromise on seats in the middle of the auditorium. He leaves a seat between us, where I assume Bailey will sit. I don’t want to sit right next to Theo. I wish he’d sit somewhere entirely different, but I won’t push it.
“Hey, Walsh.” Theo leans across the empty seat to talk to me. “I was thinking maybe I could take Lily out to dinner after this. To celebrate.”
Lily is supposed to be with us tonight, but it’s okay by me if he wants to take her to dinner. That way Bailey and I could go somewhere ourselves. “Fine with me, but you have to ask Bailey.”
“You guys could come,” he says.
I stare straight ahead. “Thanks for the offer, but I don’t think so.”
“I took Lily and Bailey to this great restaurant last week,” he says. “Burgers and Cupcakes. Lily loved it, and Bailey thought it was okay.”
I jerk my head around to look at him. “You went to dinner with Bailey?”
“Well, Bailey and Lily. Like, as a family.” He arches an eyebrow. “Bailey didn’t tell you?”
There’s a smile playing on his lips. That asshole is doing this on purpose—he knows telling me he took Bailey and Lily to dinner would drive me nuts. But I don’t think he’s making it up. It would be easy enough to prove him wrong if he were.
That means Bailey really went out to dinner with him. And she never told me about it.
Damn it.
I don’t know what I would have said to the guy next, but Bailey comes over at that moment. Even though I’m pissed off about what she did, she looks really sexy in that green dress she’s wearing. I still don’t forgive her, but I’m slightly less angry. And it helps that when she sees us sitting one seat apart, she sits in the seat next to me that isn’t next to Theo. Theo looks disappointed but doesn’t say anything.
“There are about five dance numbers before Lily comes on,” she murmurs to me. “Plenty of time for her to mess up her hair.”
I shouldn’t say anything about the dinner. I shouldn’t. We’re at Lily’s recital and this is her day. I should be more mature than that. This day is about Lily—not me.
“Did you go out to dinner with Theo and Lily last week?” I hiss at her.
So much for being mature.
All the color drains from Bailey’s face. So that’s the answer.
“Why would you do that?” I say in a low voice that I’m hoping Theo can’t hear over the thrum of activity in the theater. Although I have a bad feeling he can.
“It wasn’t a big deal. At all.” She bites her lip. “Look, could we please talk about this later?”
“Fine.”
I shouldn’t have brought it up though, because it’s frustrating we can’t talk about it now. Although I don’t know what she could say to make it all right that she let Theo take her to dinner. I’m a level-headed guy. If she would have told me, it would have been different, but the fact she chose to hide it means she felt there was something to hide. And it’s tense between us now. The last thing I want is to be fighting with Bailey right in front of her ex-husband.
As promised, this recital is intensely boring. There is nothing here that could take my mind off how pissed off I feel. The kids are just barely dancing—they’re mostly just turning around in circles. Worse, on the third number, something goes wrong with the music and it takes ten minutes to get it working again.
The only time I manage to crack a smile is when Lily (finally!) comes on the stage. She worked really hard on this dance number—she’s been practicing it every night in front of us. Maybe I’m biased, but she seems to be a better dancer than any of the other kids on the stage. Bailey is really enjoying it too. She takes my hand while the girls have joined hands to spin in a circle, and I give her a squeeze back.
And after that, it’s deathly boring again for the next forty minutes.
Intermission couldn’t come fast enough. The second the lights in the theater turn back up, Theo leans across us and says, “Hey, she wasn’t too bad!”
“Yeah,” I mutter.
He glances at his watch. “So what now? Can we see her?”
Bailey nods. “You can go downstairs and talk to her until the second act.” She glances at me, then back at him. “Why don’t you go on ahead, Theo? We’ll meet you down there.”
Theo flashes us a grin. He knows we’re about to have it out and he’s thrilled—asshole. “No problem.”
I hate him. I want to knock that stupid grin off his face. Why did I get him that goddamn job? Why did I put him on the path to getting his shit back together? What the hell was I thinking?
No. That’s selfish. It
’s been bad for me, but it’s been good for Lily. She deserves a father who isn’t a loser. That’s why I got Theo a job in the first place.
We’re both holding our breath until Theo disappears down the aisle and out of the auditorium. The second he’s out of earshot, she levels her brown eyes at me and says, “I’m really sorry. But I swear, it wasn’t a big deal.”
I take a deep breath. “I don’t like the idea of you having dinner with him.”
“But it was with Lily.”
“That’s even worse.” I shake my head. “Or… it’s just as bad. He’s your ex. And… I’m just going to say it… he’s a dick.”
“Sometimes he’s a dick,” she agrees. “But not all the time. I mean, he’s not that bad. I married him, after all.”
I stare at her. “What the fuck does that mean?”
Her cheeks turn bright pink. “That came out wrong,” she says quickly. “I’m just saying… Lily wanted to have dinner with her father, and I didn’t see any harm in it. He is her father.”
Right. Her father. That’s why she ran all over, proudly introducing him to everyone in the dance class. “He sure is.”
“It wasn’t a big deal at all. I promise you.”
“Maybe it wasn’t to you.”
“Noah…”
“If it wasn’t a big deal then why didn’t you tell me?”
She hesitates, because she doesn’t have a good answer to that question.
I grab my cane that’s leaning against the seat in front of me. “You know what, Bailey? I think I’m going to take off.”
She blinks at me. “Are you serious?”
“Yeah, I’m not in the mood for this. And Lily already danced.”
“But she still has the finale…”
“I’m sorry.” I get to my feet, grabbing onto the seat in front of me to keep my balance. “I’ve got to get out of here.”
Her eyebrows bunch together. “You’re not even going to go see Lily downstairs?”
From what I could tell, it’s at least two long flights of stairs to get down to see Lily. Stairs have always been hard for me, but now they’re near impossible. Intermission will be over by the time I make it down there. But I don’t want to point out my shortcomings to Bailey. Not now.
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