“Where else did you expect a pack of werewolves to meet?”
“So, the whole pack will be there?”
“You are bringing a challenger, right? They’ll be there as both witnesses and to take sides.”
I decided that asking him what I was worrying about was better than not knowing.
“If Eramus wins, will we be allowed to leave or is it a trap?”
“Maxwell is a bastard, but the beta wolf, second in command, is a man of his word.”
“Who is the beta wolf?”
“Me.”
Somehow, that didn’t surprise me as much as it would have a few weeks ago.
“Wolf, can I ask you something?”
“Sure.”
“Since lycanthropy heals any physical problems, why didn’t you just offer to turn your mom? I know that’s a terrible thing to say, but wouldn’t she rather be a werewolf than die of cancer?”
“No,” he answered softly, hanging his head.
That one word said so much. His whole body seemed to sag with the weight of my question. How horrible it must be to know someone would rather die than become what you are. Cancer is an awful way to go. It’s hard to watch someone you love suffer like that. I know from personal experience, two of my uncles went that way.
Even though he had mixed my tattoo ink with werewolf blood, it broke my heart to see Crazy Wolf in such pain. His heartbreak was almost tangible. I took a step forward onto the porch and wrapped my arms around his waist. If there was one thing I had learned since having my blood mixed, it was that werewolves craved physical contact. I had always been a hugging sort of person. But now…I needed to be touched. If Wolf was the same way, then having me keep distance between us must have been the hardest thing about answering my question.
“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have asked.”
He hugged me so tightly that I couldn’t fight back the tears. There was desperation in his embrace. When I heard him crying it was as if my heart was broken too. I could almost literally feel his pain. Guess that’s what comes from knowing someone for so long.
“I’m so sorry for hurting you,” he said. “Please forgive me. When my mother turned me down…this was the only choice I had to help her. She’d rather die than be like me.”
I couldn’t imagine the pain he must have been going through for the past three years. I was so caught up in my relationship with James and then our breakup, I had failed to notice. I felt like an ass. Wolf had become like family to me years ago. And just like family, I had taken him for granted and avoided him except for holidays. As angry as I had been before, it was a choice between potentially hurting me or his dying mother. How could I hold that against him? I was still alive. Changed yes, but alive.
“You did what you had to do,” I said softly.
“No.” He pulled back and wiped his eyes. “I betrayed a trust. There’s always another option.”
I smiled. “That’s noble of you, Wolf, but I’d have done it to you in the same situation.”
He looked surprised. “Really?”
“Given a choice between helping one of my parents to fight a fatal disease or take a chance on linking you to an alpha werewolf? Yeah, I’d do it. I’d hate myself but it’s the only option. Even if you’d let him kill you, that would still leave your mom with no one to help her.”
“What are you saying?”
I took his hand and pulled him close again. “I’m saying I forgive you.”
When he pulled back from me this time, something had changed in his dark eyes. Wolf looked down at me again and his long hair spilled forward, framing his face. The effect was striking.
“Don’t be afraid of Maxwell. If for some reason Eramus doesn’t win…” His words trailed off. We both knew he meant if Eramus was killed. “I will challenge Maxwell myself. I won’t let him touch you.”
“Wolf, you don’t have to—”
“Yes, I do. You said it yourself, this is my fault. If things go badly tomorrow, you can depend on me.”
“Thank you.” He started to leave and I grabbed his hand again. “I do have one more question. I’ve been learning about all this stuff from Eramus. Anyway, I thought that you had to be the beta wolf to challenge the alpha. Or that an alpha from another pack could issue a challenge. How does that work, because Eramus doesn’t have his own pack?”
“In this case Maxwell is putting everything on the line. He’s a cocky son of a bitch. That’s one reason the mark hasn’t been used in ages. It opens the pack up to outsiders who haven’t worked their way through the ranks, so to speak. Everyone advised him against it, but he doesn’t exactly take our opinions to heart.”
I didn’t want to let him go because I didn’t want to be alone, but I did. Besides, Eramus would be back soon.
*
Eramus spent the rest of the day in preparation. I knew that whatever he was doing was necessary, but this left me alone with my thoughts and at the moment that wasn’t a good thing. If someone had told me a few months ago that I’d be dating a werewolf, I’d have said they were nuts. If they’d told me that I would be involved in a battle for leadership of the local werewolf pack, I’d have looked up the number to the crazy house. If they’d said that the fight would also determine who gets to be my mate, I’d have just driven them there instead of calling the men in white coats.
To say that I was under stress was like saying that the ocean is wet. I tried everything to distract myself. Reading didn’t work because I kept staring out the window. Same for watching television, it just couldn’t keep my attention. To make matters worse, there was a monster movie marathon on. Great. As if I wanted to watch werewolf movies right now.
I had no idea what Eramus was doing to prepare for the fight, but I was certain he didn’t need any distractions. I did everything I could to keep from walking over to his house. However, by nightfall, my good intentions had evaporated completely. I needed to be with him, even if I just sat there and watched whatever it was he was doing.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Into the night
When I opened the door, I didn’t expect to find anything there. Least of all a large box. I looked around, but no one was there. At least, not that I could see. The box was light, too light to have a bomb inside. Wow. My thoughts had really changed in the last month. Just a short while ago I would have assumed that a box like this contained roses or something. Now I was guessing it wasn’t heavy enough to be a bomb.
I sat the box on the kitchen table and took a good look. It was white, but not plain. There were all sorts of designs on the surface and it was tied with a large red ribbon. Pretty. I considered leaving it there and going over to Eramus’ as I had planned. But, wasn’t I just looking for a distraction?
I pulled the red ribbon carefully and opened the box. No card, no flowers, just a beautiful red dress. I assumed it was for me to wear tomorrow night. I’m not sure how I knew that. Guess I just had a feeling. I also had a feeling that Maxwell had sent it. For that reason, I was determined to go in jeans and a t-shirt.
I put on my jacket once more and headed toward Eramus. My mind was in absolute turmoil and if I didn’t see him soon, I felt as if I might become physically ill. The odds were certainly against us. Eramus may have been a badass werewolf hunter, but this was different. This was a fight to the death with an alpha werewolf for leadership of a pack! Eramus may have been powerful, however that did not mean he could stand up to a pack of werewolves all on his own. I trusted Crazy Wolf when he said he was a man of his word. It was the rest of the pack that concerned me.
I was honest enough with myself to admit this might be the last night I got to spend with Eramus and I didn’t intend to waste it sitting at home. We stood a better chance together, and that’s what I planned to say when he opened the door. Only when I knocked, it was open.
“Eramus?”
I pushed the door further open. No sign of Eramus. After closing and locking the door behind me, I made my way into the living room. There he was, standing
in front of the large fireplace, wearing his long dark robe and black silk pajama pants.
“Sit down,” he said softly.
I did. However, I continued to watch him.
“I haven’t meant to ignore you today. I’ve been going over a lot of things, doing some research.”
“I need to talk to you.”
Eramus propped against the mantle, staring into the flames as he replied, “I’m listening.”
With the two of us alone like this, Maxwell and all his bullshit seemed a world away. The fire shined in the dim light, casting a soft glow over Eramus’ features. He was gorgeous, as always, but I was distracted. I shared my concerns with him, to which he listened quietly before saying, “I may have found something that can help us.”
“A way for us to win, you mean?”
He sighed heavily. “I would like to say that I can take Maxwell, no problem. But the truth is I have no idea what to expect. I haven’t been able to find anything on him. If it were only my life on the line that would be one thing, I’ve done that before under different circumstances. But it’s not just my life. Crazy Wolf stopped by here after he left your house. Maxwell is insisting on your presence—and it’s you I’m worried about.”
“You found something that might help us?”
“I’m not sure you’ll want to hear what I’ve found.”
I could hear the warning in his voice. But I was tired of worrying. I wanted this to be over with. And I wanted to survive. “What did you find?”
He stared into the fire, and I watched as the flames reflected in his honey colored eyes. I had finally decided he wasn’t going to answer me when Eramus said very softly, “You could take me as your mate.”
“What would that mean exactly?” I felt as if he was already a part of me. I wasn’t sure what “taking him as my mate” would mean exactly, but I was willing to hear him out.
“There are all different kinds of ways you can become someone’s mate. You could go the traditional route and get married.”
For a second there I couldn’t breathe. Did he just mention marriage? It’s not that I was opposed to the idea, I was just completely unprepared.
“Don’t get me wrong,” he said quickly. The look on my face must have alerted him to my surprise. “I’m just saying what I’ve read. To be truly mated, according to some, will actually lend you the strength of your mate.”
“What are you saying?”
“You would be able to draw from my strength. If everything goes to hell tomorrow it might give you a greater chance of survival.” He paused before adding, “In the event that I’m not able to help you.”
What he meant was that if he was killed he wanted to be sure I made it out alive. I wasn’t sure what to say. Was he doing this just to save me or did he really want to be my mate?
“And would this benefit you in any way?”
He smiled sadly. “You still don’t understand that I want to be with you. Of course I’d get something out of it—you. We’d also have a greater connection.”
“Like telepathy?”
“Not exactly. We won’t be able to hear each other’s thoughts or anything like that. But I can sense when you’re in danger.”
I smiled. “That’s sort of romantic.”
“Yeah, like a knight in fur-covered armor,” he joked.
Eramus had moved to sit on the rug in front of the stone hearth. I was quiet for several minutes while I joined him to stare into the fire. I searched the flames for answers I knew they didn’t have. The fabric of my jeans became hot against my skin and I stepped back, taking a seat beside Eramus on the rug. I watched him for several minutes, wondering how to say what I was feeling. I simply couldn’t face tonight alone.
Finally he said, “My grandfather always said that there is one true mate for every werewolf. Someone who will add to what they are.”
“Sort of as if there’s someone for everyone?”
“Yes.”
“And what do you think about that?”
“I believe you were meant for me.” He took my hand and pulled me closer. “And I was meant for you.”
I couldn’t count the times I’d dreamed of his handsome face since he moved in beside me. Not one of those dreams equaled up to this moment. After James and I didn’t work out, I never thought I’d be happy again. For the past year it felt as if I couldn’t breathe most of the time. Especially when I thought of James or trying to move on. As I sat there holding Eramus’ hand, I realized that for the first time in a while I could breathe deeply again. I had never wanted anything more than to be with him.
“How is it done? Other than marriage.”
He hesitated. “After all that’s happened I hate to even tell you this, but you’d have to take some of my blood.”
That probably should have upset me, but it really didn’t. I can’t say the thought was appealing, but after everything else it was nice to at least be given the choice.
“Will I, you know, turn?”
“No. There’s more. I’d need to take some of your blood too. Sort of like an exchange. It would bind us to each other. It’s normally done just between two werewolves. But I think there is enough of the wolf in you for it to work.”
“What would that mean for tomorrow night, besides me being stronger?”
“You would be mine,” he said softly.
“Would Maxwell be able to sense this?”
“If it works correctly, everyone would.”
I moved closer and brushed the hair back from his face. I remembered the way I felt when he touched me for the very first time, and knew that a part of me was already his. No matter how much I had loved James my feelings for him could never compare to what I felt just sitting beside Eramus. It wasn’t just lust or affection, it was real. And it was definitely love. I would have given my soul if he’d asked, but all he wanted was my blood.
“What do I need to do?”
He brushed the hair back from my face, imitating my gesture from before. The softness in his eyes made me weak.
“Make love to me,” he whispered. “I’ll explain the rest as we go. It’s not entirely unlike turning a vampire.”
I trembled slightly as he took my face in his hands. “You won’t grow fangs, I swear.”
“How is it like turning a vampire then? I don’t understand.”
“There must be an exchange of blood and of flesh.” He kissed me softly, and as he pulled back he asked, “Are you afraid of me?”
I smiled as I watched his eyes turn amber. “No.”
He closed his eyes and sighed. He seemed to be holding back so much. “You’ve seen what I am, and you’d still be willing to do this?”
“Yes.”
I knew the moment he held me that I should never have been afraid of him, even for a second. I had no doubt that he would die to protect me. No place in the world would ever be as safe as his arms.
He kissed me again and I felt a change within him. When he pulled back, nothing had visibly changed. I can’t explain it other than there was a certain…power in his kiss. I knew he would not hold back with me this time. The beast was going to come out, even if he didn’t change.
I remembered what Crazy Wolf had said about being afraid that if we’d had sex years ago he might have broken me. I was pretty sure that after the changes I’d undergone, Eramus wouldn’t break me. But it might still be more than I could take. He held me close, deepening the kiss.
The world around me ceased to exist. It was as if time stood still. Tomorrow night faded from my thoughts along with everything else. There was nothing but the feel of his lips against mine. His tongue probed my mouth gently and I moaned.
His hands caressed my body, relieving me of my coat and my shirt before I realized what was going on. His touch was soft and gentle, filled with desire. The look in his eyes said more than any flowery words ever could. He wanted me. That was easy to see. But he also loved me and the emotion clearly etched in his expression made my chest feel tight
.
Just like the beast he made reference to so often, Eramus was obviously powerful. He could just take me if he chose, but he didn’t. He surrendered to me when he could have conquered. Is there anything really sexier than that?
“Do it,” I whispered. “Take me.”
He smiled and for the first time I realized his fangs had grown. But this time I wasn’t afraid. He took my index finger and brought it slowly to his lips. I tensed, knowing that he intended to prick my finger, but there was no pain. My body began to arch and I shook with the pleasure his small bite produced.
“Isn’t it only supposed to feel good when a vampire bites you?” I gasped.
His eyes blazed just like the fire and I shivered again.
“Werewolves enjoy a little pain with their pleasure.”
He didn’t need to say more. Obviously, I had changed enough that this applied to me. Because I sure as hell liked the sensation when he bit me. Eramus put my fingertip into his mouth and sucked gently, bringing another moan from my lips. I could feel my eyes rolling back and my toes curling so hard I thought it might cause a cramp.
After a few minutes he withdrew my finger and his lips were stained red with my blood. I watched as Eramus pulled open his robe, revealing the body that occupied so many of my thoughts. I wrapped myself around him, rubbing my face against the soft hair on his stomach.
I watched as he brought his fingertip to his fangs before lowering his hand toward me.
“Your turn,” he said. His voice had grown deeper with desire and the change he was no doubt fighting back. He’d told me that sex and violence brought out the beast. Wasn’t this a little of both? He must have been in turmoil.
He placed his hand on the back of my head and brought my lips to the wound. “Yes,” he whispered as I wrapped my lips around his finger. I drank deeply, surprised at how much I was enjoying this. I ran my tongue up and down his finger, pulling it in and out of my mouth and he moaned.
Eramus pulled me back suddenly and kissed me again. Our blood mingled as we kissed and I felt a rush at the contact. I reached up and over his chest, sliding the robe off his shoulders and as my hand touched his skin I felt a shiver run through him as well. There was something so forbidden, so all consuming and yet gentle about his seduction. I had never felt this way before. I thought that only vampires could seduce someone this way, but I was wrong. It wouldn’t have surprised me if Eramus could hypnotize with his eyes just like Dracula.
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