by Sonja Bair
The next few seconds happened in slow motion. As the rock descended, the werewolf that was Jerry looked up at me. The eyes, which were surrounded by the head of a wolf, had turned human. And with those eyes, Jerry told me that he understood my actions and that he was very sorry for what he had become. Closing his eyes, a look of peace flashed over his canine features. And at that very second, the rock caved in his head.
I will never forget the sound of the skull shattering, or the sight of blood and brain matter splattering over everything in a three-foot radius. The smell will stay with me forever as well, a coppery smell, sort of like the smell of old pennies. I threw up.
Wiping my face, I looked up. Viktor lay motionless in a growing puddle of blood. I needed to get him help. Stumbling back to the conference center, I pulled open the door and yelled out to anyone and everyone to call 911. Call them now; Viktor’s dying.
As soon as I passed responsibility to others, my legs collapsed under me and I folded down onto the ground in a heap. I had killed someone. With a rock. My stomach threatened to revolt again, but I held it down. The conference room was emptying rapidly as people ran by me to get outside. In fact, the first ones out were already back, calling for first aid supplies and reporting that the ambulance was on its way. Others were hurriedly discussing what to do with Jerry’s body, still in wolf form. I heard someone say they were going to make it look like a wolf had attacked and then run away. I thought of telling them that most wolves wouldn’t run away after they had their brains splattered everywhere, but the words weren’t coming out.
Out of the corner of my eye, I saw David sit down next to me. He didn’t say anything, just put his arm around my shoulder. We sat like that for a few minutes. I heard the ambulance sirens scream into the parking lot and then scream away. After silence once more descended, I felt like I could talk.
“I told him a bad joke an hour ago.”
“Viktor or Jerry?”
“Jerry. He didn’t laugh, but he seemed to appreciate it.”
“I should have killed him last night when he attacked you. And Carole and Henry should have killed him days ago when it was clear he was out of control. I’m sorry that the task fell to you.”
“You know what? One of the strangest things about killing Jerry is the lack of guilt. I actually feel guilty about not feeling guilty about killing him.”
David nodded. “In a perfect world, we wouldn’t have to kill anyone. But this was about as justified as you can get. He was an out-of-control killing machine in the act of attacking someone innocent. Any court of law would excuse your actions.”
“After they got over the shock of werewolves existing.”
“Yes, after that,” David said, lightening his tone.
“So what about Jerry’s body? Will there be some sort of investigation?”
“It’s being taken care of. If there is an investigation, they won’t find anything.” I looked at him incredulously. How could the authorities not look into something like this?
David saw my doubt and smiled slightly. “Ever see Pulp Fiction?” he asked and I nodded. “Do you remember the character Mr. Wolfe?”
I paused, searching my memory, and then laughed when I came up with the connection. “No… really? You guys, the werewolves, have a Mr. Wolfe fixer?”
David nodded. “She came with the Idaho pack. It’s good to have someone who knows how to clean a crime scene when there are werewolves around—not that we have had any reason to use one recently. As a group, we’ve been very well-behaved over the last few years.”
“Did you see how Viktor was doing?”
“He lost a lot of blood—I’d say it’s touch and go. Alrik rode in the ambulance to the hospital. I’m sure he’ll keep us up to date.”
Gina wandered back into the room and sat on my other side. “The Alphas should have done what you did weeks ago.”
“What—bashed his head in with a rock?”
“Maybe not that exact method, but you know what I’m talking about. Before Jerry caused harm, they should have taken care of their problem. I know it’s tough and all to kill a pack member, but it’s their job as Alpha.”
“It’s easy to be the one sitting in judgment, much easier than the one wielding the death sentence,” David said.
“You guys are Alphas. Wouldn’t you have stopped his madness before he hurt someone?”
“I don’t know, Gina,” I said, raising my head. “But in the last second before I killed him, I believe Jerry absolved me and that, along with the attack on Viktor, made it a clear decision at the time. However, I do think that we need to figure out what is causing this werewolf plague before it happens again.”
“Good luck with that,” Gina said, looking across the room. “Tasha is looking a bit skittish right now.”
As one group, we all pivoted to look at the other werewolf who had displayed out-of-control behavior. Tasha was standing by herself in the corner of the room, white as a sheet and shaking like a leaf. I wondered how many times she had lost it recently and if there had been talks of her Alphas “dealing with the problem.” The force of our stares caught her attention and she turned, catching my gaze. Her chin rose slightly and she narrowed her eyes, but she didn’t appear angry, only defiant. I gave her a half smile, one in which I tried to express a regret for her loss, but I couldn’t scrounge up an apology.
“Viktor’s attack has set back the Alva’s relationship with the werewolves to a very bad spot,” I said, refocusing on the people around me.
“Maybe, maybe not.” A voice came from behind. Turning, I saw Tilde, the newest and—according to my mother—most hawkish Elder, approaching. I had previously seen her at large family reunions, but that was about all the interaction we had. She was tall and thin, age causing her skin to hang loosely, but wrinkles had not yet formed. The look in her eye and face was hard, but I knew from the few previous encounters I had had with her that it was her normal face—she never deigned to share her emotions with the world. I could respect that, but couldn’t imagine living life that closed off.
She sat down beside the three of us, which felt odd, like the statue of a great general cracking its stiff marble pose and taking a seat among the rowdy masses. She continued, “As Viktor said last night, many of the Alva are seeing the benefit of aligning interests with other supernaturals.”
Questions sparked in my brain, but before I spoke, I steadied myself with a breath. Impulsiveness would not gain me anything here. “Tilde, congratulations on your new role as Elder.” She accepted my greeting with a slight nod. “I have heard this is a moment of change within the Alva and I’m sure your leadership will guide the Flock well.”
She looked me over with a cocked eyebrow. “I am surprised you know anything about the Alva, as you live thousands of miles from your Flock.”
“True, but in this day and age, technology makes distance an irritation but not an impediment. For example, I have heard that this moment of change within the Flock is causing some friction, which pains me to hear. Is there some way I can help the Alva?”
“Your pain is duly noted, but you should leave the matter to the Elders. We know what is right for our people.”
“While your attempt to prevent worry and trouble for the rest of us is admirable, the power of the Flock is that there are many of us to carry burdens. I believe that if you open up the conversation, many Alva will have good ideas and helpful thoughts.”
“And how much time would we waste on useless ideas and thoughts? The system of Elders is there to cut through the babble of too many voices. We must act quickly and decisively, in all matters, even this werewolf fiasco. Your concept of this weekend convention with delegates from everywhere is a bloated mess. Therefore, in the last twenty-four hours, I have set up talks between key Elders and Alphas to which you have not been invited. Viktor’s attack has been an unfortunate event but demonstrates the necessity of addressing the situation rapidly and definitively. I believe he would conclude the same.”
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br /> I was speechless at her words, but David took the revelations in stride. “I appreciate your help and the assurance your support provides to some of the Alphas. But perhaps you can inform us of what was discussed in these meetings?”
“All this talk isn’t getting us anywhere,” Gina interrupted, frustration bleeding into her voice, turning it almost to a whine. “We are meeting and talking but doing nothing.”
“Young lady,” Tilde turned her formidable glare to Gina, “watch yourself. Although some may think you have earned a place in this meeting by right of your visions and background, your actions have not convinced me of the value you are adding.”
“But isn’t Gina right in that we haven’t addressed the root cause of the problem?” I asked, feeling the need to defend my packmate.
“Premature action can often cause more problems than it solves. Really, Freya, did your time at the USN not teach you this?”
I stifled the huffy response that welled up in me. “Maybe not. So you mentioned talks which have gone on that I don’t know about. What happened?”
“I shall share those details when they are necessary.”
This time, my irritation at her unyielding condescension boiled over. “Forgive my impertinence, but I believe that I do have a place at the table. I am the only one here who is both part of the Alva and part of the werewolves. I don’t understand why you find it necessary to have this air of mystery around your discussions. We need to be united—David and I, and even Gina, need to be part of the solution.”
Elders are not talked to in such a combative and resistive manner. I have seen many of my peers swallow their pride and anger and dutifully concede to decisions which infuriated them. These same people, however, grew up under the protective wings of the Elders in Sweden. I grew up in Chicago, hearing about the Elders but not experiencing the day-to-day control they exerted. And now I was thoroughly riled and not about to back down from protesting what I considered to be poor judgment. I geared up for telling Tilde a little more of what I thought of her presumptuous behavior, but David beat me to the punch.
“I agree with Freya,” he began, but his voice didn’t hold the emotion that would have clouded mine. Instead, his was as smooth as butter. “We need to work as a team on this problem, and information should be shared. But maybe we could better understand your stance if you told us the reason why we were not invited to the meetings.”
Tilde tilted her head slightly to the side and took a moment to consider his words. Hope bloomed in me that maybe she would change her mind and invite us to these secret gatherings, or at least explain herself, but I had forgotten how stiff and unrelenting the Elders can be. Tilde turned and met David’s glance full on, then crushed my blooming hope.
“You say that Freya is an Alpha. I personally do not believe this to be the case. Elders in the Alva have gained their post from decades of proven experience and wisdom. Perhaps Freya could gain these skills over the years, but she doesn’t have them now. Her mother could have been an Elder if she didn’t choose to be an Ambassador at the USN, and Freya may follow in her footsteps eventually. Now, however, Freya is a young, naïve schoolteacher who got mixed up with some other supernaturals. The Alpha of these supernaturals fell in love with her and needed some way to hook her into his life. One of Freya’s many shortcomings is her overly trusting and giving nature. So, David, you convinced her that she is an Alpha of this group of werewolves you have gathered and somehow, you convinced the others of the same. This is why Freya is here and involved. I apologize for being so brusque, but I do not trust your motives, your leadership, or intentions. These reasons, along with Freya not being mature enough, are why neither of you have been invited to the higher level talks. Forgive me for what I assume will be hard truths to hear.”
The wind was knocked out of me, just as much as if I had been punched in the gut. I opened my mouth to say something, some retort that would demonstrate how wrong she was, but nothing came out. Face blushing red, I stared straight in front of me until I saw Tilde studying me from the corner of my eye. I turned to her, but she spoke first.
“I suppose my words shocked you, Freya, but it is the truth as I see it. If I were you, I would tread very carefully with this Alpha role. I fear David’s surreptitious manipulation may come out and you will be harmed by the very pack that you are supposed to be leading. And I speak for many of the Alva when I say that you have overstepped your bounds.” Standing up, she gracefully brushed any bits of dirt from her hands and walked away without a goodbye or backward glance.
I watched her retreat with a fair bit of anger. How could she be so dismissive of non-Elder opinions? And many scenarios had run through my head since David told me that I was Alpha of this werewolf pack, but it never occurred to me that he was deceiving me about my role. I considered her words again—no, they didn’t ring true. Like it or not, I was the Alpha of this pack. Tilde was wrong about that, at least.
I turned to David. He sat with his long, denim-clad legs stretched out in front of him, crossed at the ankle. Leaning back on arms stretched behind him, he watched me with one eyebrow cocked up in a questioning expression. It appeared he wasn’t pressing me to say anything, nor was he vehemently denying the charges that Tilde leveled against him. It looked as though he was merely waiting for my reaction.
“She’s full of it,” I said.
“Full of it in what particular way?” he said, his eyes crinkled at the edges as he smiled.
“In many different ways, but pertinent to right now, the one regarding me not being an Alpha. I would jump at the chance not to be an Alpha, but I sense it too deeply for it not to be true. Besides, the other werewolves have never balked at me claiming to be an Alpha, only balked at me being an Alpha.”
“Agreed. And they have pushed back so hard on your role that...”
Gina interrupted David. “But, Freya, she said some horrible crap about you. You aren’t going to defend yourself?”
I had basically forgotten that Gina was sitting next to me, I was so involved with the encounter with Tilde. Looking at Gina now, she was trembling in anger and I could tell that she was ready to jump up and break out a can of whoop-ass on the Elder. I was half-touched by her concern, half-alarmed at her willingness to jump to violence so quickly. I patted her knee softly. “No. It’s not worth it. Plus, I’ll be honest and admit that I can be unwise and immature at times.”
“That’s not true,” Gina practically shouted. “Just because you are young doesn’t mean you can’t lead. And old people don’t get a free pass to say whatever they want and be bossy just because they have been on this planet longer than we have.”
“No, they don’t,” replied David. “But no matter who says something, young or old, we shouldn’t react violently when someone shares their views. Everyone is allowed opinions, whether we agree with them or not.”
Gina made a sort of grumbling acknowledgment to his words, then bounced up and headed toward her brother, who had entered the room.
“So what do we do about not being part of the secret club?” I asked David.
“I’ll ask some Alphas I’m friendly with about it. I have a feeling these closed-door meetings may be with the Alphas that are particularly opposed to your role as leader. It may be a not-so-subtle dig at your Alpha status.”
I paused to consider his words. After a minute or so, I replied with the best response I could think of. “Ever notice that the word subtle has a silent b in the middle? Someone with a sense of humor invented that word.”
David laughed. “Remember how I said during the first meeting you contributed something different to the werewolf powers? I truly believe no werewolf who has ever walked on God’s green Earth would have responded to an insult with that observation. And I’m pretty sure that type of comment is part of your powers.”
I shrugged. If random observations and bad jokes could be a power, then maybe I could hold my own.
Chapter 21
After the meeting conclude
d in the early evening, David called up Pedro and Philip to arrange a pack meeting. Although most of Tilde’s words about the Alpha status had rolled off my back, I wanted to connect with the rest of the pack and reassure myself about at least one thing in the world. We ordered Chinese food to be delivered to David’s house, the current residence of both Pedro and Philip as well. Since the twins’ parents were not speaking to either child at this point, Rex joined us for dinner. I wondered if we would be gaining yet another new pack member soon.
Philip enveloped me in a big hug as soon as he saw me. “You are really getting it from all sides, aren’t you, sweetheart? Don’t worry; I think you’re fabulous, even if you aren’t as hairy as the usual Alpha.”
Smiling at his words, I replied that he should see my legs when I didn’t get around to shaving. Arm still around my neck, he pshawed my reply and tried to peer into the food bag I was holding. Pulling it away, I turned to the rest of the pack.
“I’ve had a tough day. Let’s go for some fresh air and exercise, mixed-up werewolf pack style.”
“Go out to the ranch and go for a run and/or flight?” David asked.
“Yup. Let’s have a picnic, then release our wild side.” Part of the reason I said this was because I really did need to stretch my wings and burn some energy, but the other reason was to feel the pack bonds again. I felt them the strongest when we were running as a pack. Perhaps things were simpler in our more animal form.
We ended up eating by the cars at the ranch, watching the sunset. Dusk approached early this time of year in SLO, and the clouds briefly lit up red and orange, then melted into the dark blue of fading light. The sunset plus the sweet and sour pork in my belly softened my mood and carved some rough edges off the day. As I had told David, I was surprisingly okay with killing a person, odd as that sounded. As far as killings went, it seemed to fit the justified category well. Alrik’s last report on Viktor’s condition was encouraging. Viktor’s bites had been stitched up and was receiving transfusions to replace the blood that he had lost. Although it was touch and go in the ambulance and the early moments at the hospital, he was pulling through. He had woken from his unconscious state briefly, but had only muttered nonsense and then promptly fallen asleep. Back at the conference center, the police and animal control had scouted around outside for a while right after Viktor had been taken in, but it appeared the werewolves’ fixer knew what she was doing. The authorities concluded that a feral dog must have attacked, warned us to be on the lookout, and started a broader search for the dog.