“Let the girl eat,” said Leslie. “She’s had a busy day.”
9
King Prayard no longer showed any surprise when Wad appeared in Bexoi’s heavily guarded chamber. Whether he guessed at Wad’s connection to the Queen—as her lover or as her enemy—was not a particularly interesting question to Wad. The baby in her womb right now was Prayard’s. So whether Prayard resented past betrayals was not a matter of concern to Wad. He had no grounds for feeling betrayed now.
Of course, Wad also knew that people judged whether something was right or wrong by their own standards, and those standards were rarely rational. Wad’s own standards were as mad as could be. Yet they felt viscerally right and true to him, so that if he did not live by them he felt a deep unease until he made things right. That was why he couldn’t simply kill Bexoi and have done with her—because if killing his baby had been wrong, then killing her baby must be just as wrong. Because the crime in killing his boy Trick had not been the offense to and betrayal of Wad, it was in depriving that wonderful, clever, beautiful boy of his life. So taking vengeance on Bexoi by killing a child that was just as innocent would not be vengeance at all, but a new crime, a new injustice. Wad knew this was the law he had to live by, but he did not know why he felt this way, or where his moral code came from. He only knew that he could not bear the idea of doing something as vile as the crime Bexoi had committed.
Yet Prayard might have a completely different moral code, one in which cuckolding a man was not such a bad thing, but cuckolding a king was treason. Or in which a wife’s womb, once it had borne bastard fruit, could never bear a truly legitimate heir. Prayard himself probably did not know how he would feel about Bexoi’s adultery, particularly since it happened at a time when Prayard himself was not acting in such a way as to conceive a child. Not that such a distinction would necessarily matter to Prayard.
There were times when Wad was curious about how Prayard would decide to act if he knew the whole truth about the past. He toyed with the idea of telling him. And then he had to recognize that one not-unlikely response Prayard might have would be to kill Bexoi forthwith. And since by that act, Wad would be indirectly causing the death of the baby, he could not take the chance. Could never take the chance. This baby would be Prayard’s true child. Prayard should not be given any reason to doubt it. So Wad kept his peace.
Yet he also made it a point to come to Bexoi’s sleeping body only when Prayard himself was there. If he came to her when Prayard was away, the King might suspect that Wad was hiding something from him. That would provoke suspicion and Wad did not want to provoke suspicion.
“There’s been no change in her,” said Prayard softly.
“Except the baby is growing,” said Wad.
“Nearly to term now,” said Prayard. “And how can a baby be delivered when the mother is asleep?”
“Maybe the coming of the baby will waken her,” said Wad, though he did not believe it.
“And maybe not,” said Prayard. “Maybe the baby will be ready for birth, but her body won’t know it, won’t work to squeeze it out. Maybe it will stay within her, growing and growing, until it bursts her belly and she dies, and the baby dies.”
“I won’t let that happen,” said Wad.
“And how will you stop it? Is midwifery among your talents?”
“You can have a surgeon cut the baby out.”
“I know of that procedure,” said Prayard. “The mother always dies, and the baby often dies, or it was already dead.”
“If I’m here,” said Wad, “then the Queen will not die, and the baby will not die, and I can promise you that as of this moment, the baby is healthy and alive. Why do you think I come so often? It’s to make sure that this remains true up to the moment when the baby is born—or is taken.”
“Do you really think I’ll let anyone cut into my lady’s belly? Do you think I’ll allow a knife anywhere near her?”
“Yes, I do,” said Wad. “If your choice is between the knife and her certain death, you’ll choose the knife, with me watching to keep her safe.”
“You can heal her from the knife, but not from this … this sleep that is on her.”
“She is not asleep,” said Wad. “I believe she hears all, knows what is happening, listens to this conversation. She’s helpless to respond, because her body is not under her control.”
“So is she under the control of a manmage?” asked Prayard.
“Don’t imagine manmages to be all that powerful,” said Wad. “This is a weak age of the world, with no Great Gates to enhance the power of mages. No manmage could steal this woman’s body from her.”
But Anonoei had been through a Great Gate. And Enopp and Eluik had some weird power over each other that had left Eluik as silent as Bexoi, though not quite so inert. Wad had no idea if what he was saying to Prayard was the truth. He almost hoped that it was not, because that might mean that Anonoei was somehow still alive, trapped—at least her ba—inside Bexoi. So when it came time to kill Bexoi—after the baby was safely born—then killing her might also liberate the remnant of Anonoei, setting her ba free to return to Duat, the way Danny North had set the captive gates free by giving them to themselves.
As if he had been called by Wad’s thought of him, Danny North suddenly stood behind King Prayard, his hands in his pockets, slouching like a boy who isn’t sure whether he’s going to be in trouble or not.
How could Danny North be here on Westil? If he had made another Great Gate, Wad would know it, not just because he could sense any gate that was made on either world, but also because all of Danny’s gates were under Wad’s control, and could not be used without Wad’s knowledge.
Only Wad now realized that Danny had appeared here without the use of any gate at all, or at least none that Wad could see. And Wad could see all gates. How had Danny come?
Prayard must have noticed Wad’s surprise, because he turned to look where Wad was looking.
Danny North wasn’t there.
But he wasn’t dodging Prayard’s notice. Danny North was now kneeling at the head of Bexoi’s bed, and he reached out a hand and touched her forehead.
“Who are you?” asked Prayard quietly. “You came as this one comes. Are you a gatemage?”
“He is,” said Wad. “But he has no business here.”
“Then send him away,” said Prayard.
Wad tried. He made a gate and passed it over Danny North—but Danny did not move. It was unthinkable—nobody could resist the power of a gate. And yet that’s what he had done.
“I just tried to do that,” said Wad, “and it didn’t work.”
“You can’t gate me away,” said Danny. “And you don’t want to, either. Because I’m here to bring this woman out of her coma.”
“That’s not within your power,” said Wad.
“You don’t know my power,” said Danny. “I say that I can bring her back. But I think you don’t want me to.”
Wad had no answer for that, because if he told the truth to Danny, Prayard would hear.
So they looked at each other in silence.
“I understand,” said Prayard. “You have secrets of gatemagery to discuss, but can’t speak freely in front of me.”
“It would be helpful if you weren’t here,” Danny said.
“He’s the King,” said Wad, “and this is his wife.”
“If he loves her,” said Danny, “then he’ll do whatever it takes to bring her back. Even if it means trusting me, a stranger, enough to leave this place while I do what I have learned how to do.”
“Is that Other still inside you?” asked Wad.
Danny North knelt there silently, looking at Prayard.
“I’ll go,” said Prayard.
“There’s no need for you to leave,” said Wad, “because whatever this foolish boy thinks he’s going to do, I forbid it.”
“You can’t stop me,” said Danny, “and King Prayard doesn’t want me to be stopped.”
Prayard rose up fro
m the stool on which he had been keeping vigil. “As long as Wad is here to keep you from harming her, I’ll trust you.”
“This boy isn’t even from our world,” said Wad. “You can’t trust him.”
“I know he isn’t from Westil,” said Prayard. “Look at him, listen to his accent. He’s obviously from Mittlegard. Yet he came here in spite of the Gate Thief. And you didn’t have the power to send him away. So of all the mages in this room, I think that he’s the most powerful.”
“I am,” said Danny North, “but I won’t harm anyone.”
“You’ll harm everyone,” said Wad.
“No,” said Danny. “I know what’s keeping her silent and still, and I know how to remedy that, and you don’t know, and you don’t want to know.”
“I don’t want to know,” said Prayard, though he obviously knew Danny’s words had been aimed at Wad. “But I want my wife back.”
“And the baby safely born,” said Danny.
“When the time comes,” said Prayard.
“The time is now,” said Danny. “And Wad knows it.”
Prayard looked at Wad. Apparently Wad’s ability to look innocent had left him, because Prayard immediately said, “When were you going to tell me, Wad?”
“It could be now, or it could be in a week, or two weeks,” said Wad. “I’m waiting to see if she goes into labor on her own.”
“He knows that the time is now, and that Bexoi must be awakened before the birth, and he hasn’t got the power to waken her, and I do.”
“So you say,” said Wad.
“I came here, didn’t I?” said Danny North. “And you couldn’t detect my coming, or send me away, or even understand how I came. I will do this, Loki. If you try to stop me, then I’ll take away from you the power to interfere.”
“Come with me, Wad,” said Prayard. “This is a mighty mage, young though he seems to be. Old men like us need to recognize when someone else has the mastery of us.”
“King Prayard speaks wisely,” said Danny, “and he’s leaving. Now, Loki—will you go or will you stay?”
“I’ll stay.”
“I’ll go,” said Prayard. And he did. Because he wore slippers to keep the cold of the stone from his feet, there was a hushing sound as his steps took him from the room. Then the door swung shut and Wad was alone with Danny.
“The last thing that Westil needs,” said Wad very softly, “is this bitch awake again, to do more killing.”
“I agree,” said Danny. “But that’s only half the story. You want the firemage to stay powerless. But what about the manmage?”
Wad felt a flood of relief. “So she died with her ba inside the Queen,” he said.
“No,” said Danny. “She is inside this body, ka and ba, and she and the Queen struggle equally for control.”
“Manmages can’t send their ka,” said Wad.
“Except for the ones who can,” said Danny. “Anonoei’s boys, Eluik and Enopp? I’ve seen what’s really happening there—it’s Enopp who is inside Eluik; that’s why Eluik is silent. Enopp’s ka is inside him, and all that remains in Enopp’s own body is his outself, as if his own body were his heartbeast.”
“Not possible,” said Wad.
“I agree. And yet my friend Pat has just drawn Enopp out of his brother, and now she and Eluik are trying to keep Enopp from dying.”
“And by ‘dying’ you mean—”
“I mean going back to Duat,” said Danny North.
“And is that what you plan to do here?” asked Wad.
“This case isn’t simple, because where Enopp and Eluik love each other, these two are at war. A constant bitter stalemate which neither of them can win.”
“Two kas in the same body,” said Wad.
“Of course the manmage has no right to be there. The body belongs to Bexoi, and Anonoei is a thief.”
“If that’s what you think—”
“That’s what is,” said Danny, “and you know it. But you also know that Bexoi murdered Anonoei. She burned up her body and Anonoei made this jump in that last moment of her death agony. So now there’s a serious question here. What does justice demand? That Anonoei get out of a body that she has no right to be in? Or that Bexoi make restitution to Anonoei for the body she burned up, by leaving this body so Anonoei can go on living? There’s something proportional in that, don’t you think? Even though the law would normally demand that we go the other way.”
“How do you know any of this? You can’t know it.”
“I not only know it,” said Danny, “but the whole time my lips have been talking to you, my own ka has been showing things to them. Hearing what they have to say for themselves.”
“I only care about one thing at this moment,” said Wad. “Is the dragon still inside you?”
“If he were, could I be here?” asked Danny.
“That’s an evasion, not an answer,” said Wad.
“Set has no more power over me,” said Danny North. “But yes, he’s still inside my body.”
“And you brought him here?” asked Wad, his fear and fury rising.
“I did not,” said Danny North.
“Which is it? He’s inside you or not? Which?”
“He’s inside me, but he isn’t here,” said Danny North. “Instead of getting angry, why not listen to what I’m saying and try to understand it?”
“He’s inside you, but you didn’t bring him here. That’s a contradiction.”
“And yet it isn’t a contradiction, because you’re making one false assumption.”
“And what is that?” said Wad.
“You’re assuming that I’m here,” said Danny North.
“I can see you,” said Wad.
“You once saw Bexoi die a bloody death on her bed, even as she stood beside you watching herself die,” said Danny North.
“It was her clant,” said Wad. “A brilliant clant, so real that it even bled. But you can’t be a clant, because gatemages don’t make clants.”
“Until now,” said Danny North.
“You really did die,” said Wad. “You died and went to Duat, and then came back, and now the things you’re doing…”
“I learned some things on Duat,” said Danny, “and other things I’ve figured out since then. I make gates now without my ba. Or, to speak truthfully, I transport myself and other things and people without making gates at all. I simply go.”
Wad had no choice but to believe him, because he got here somehow, and yet he did not make a gate.
“Every living person has that power, because when we die, our ka goes back to Duat, without a guide, without a ferryboat, without a spaceship, without a gate, we simply go. The power is in all of us. So my friend Pat no longer needs me or my amulet. She simply goes.”
“You were able to teach her? A windmage?”
“I taught her nothing,” said Danny North. “She died and went to Duat, and she saw all that I saw, and learned all that I learned.”
“So which will it be, Danny North? Will you waken the Queen, and drive out what’s left of poor Anonoei to return to Duat?”
“I can’t really do that,” said Danny.
“Meaning that you really can’t, or that you choose not to because it would be wrong?”
“Both,” said Danny. “When Bexoi killed Anonoei, she forfeited her right to have a body of her own.”
“So you’ll drive out Bexoi and leave her body for Anonoei?”
“I can’t do things that aren’t within my power,” said Danny.
“And here I thought you could do anything. Mage of mages.”
“I don’t have power to do things that can’t be done,” said Danny. “I can’t send Bexoi back to Duat—she has to want to go there, and given the kind of life she’s led, I don’t know how happy a reunion that will be for her.”
“I don’t care whether she’s happy there,” said Wad.
“But she cares,” said Danny North, “and if she doesn’t want to go, I can’t make her.”
“I can show Anonoei how to sink deeply and completely into the body. But that will only work if the body itself recognizes her as its rightful owner.”
“How can it?” asked Wad. “It’s Bexoi’s body.”
“It began as Bexoi’s body, and grew up as Bexoi’s body, but now its hands are covered with the blood of babies. The body doesn’t like to be dishonored like that. It may be done with her.”
“So if her own body rejects her…”
“It won’t happen that way,” said Danny North. “Her body won’t expel her. Instead it’ll accept someone else as its rightful owner. And I think that will happen only if the powers that be on Duat tell her body to do that.”
“So you might end up expelling Anonoei after all. Killing her.”
“It’s up to the body to decide.”
“The body’s just a—a puppet made of meat. It can’t decide.”
“So I thought, too, until I went to Duat, leaving my body behind. Set had it all to himself, but he couldn’t even begin to get control of it. It waited for me. It continued to be mine. But Bexoi’s body deserves better than a mistress who used that body to commit terrible murders. Don’t you think?”
“This is starting to sound like theology,” said Wad. “Justice and mercy. An eye for an eye. Not Christianity, with all its talk of forgiveness, but the older law, tit for tat, eye for eye, where the law always rules and can’t be tricked.”
“Why should I care what it sounds like? If it’s true, then it would be surprising if the idea didn’t crop up everywhere, in one form or another.”
He had a point, but Wad knew that there were rules, and somehow Danny North wasn’t following them. “How can you be a clant, when I have all your gates and you have none?”
“I’ve never made a clant, so I don’t know if that’s what I did. I asked a lot of particles to form themselves into a second body for me. And they did, so here I am.”
“Then you passed this clant through a Great Gate?”
“There is no Great Gate,” said Danny North, “and I didn’t pass the clant from Mittlegard to here, I made it here. I made it right here in this room. I made it out of the air in the room, plus the light and heat of the fire, plus my inner knowledge of how my body works, of what it truly is. And the prets in this place saw what I needed to make, and they helped me make it.”
Gatefather Page 15