He cleared his throat. “I do not know if you knew why I went off to London so abruptly.” He looked at her in inquiry and she simply looked back, not saying a word.
“All right, then. Well, I called upon your father to ask for your hand in marriage. We had a long talk.”
“I see.”
“He asked me to be sure about what I’m considering all the potential pitfalls a union such as ours would face.”
Louisa swallowed, feeling quite light headed.
Jeremy sighed. “After much introspection I came to the conclusion that I would rather risk a future which might not go as we hope to one where we don’t even try.”
“Mmm.” Louisa’s mouth was too dry for her to say any more than that.
“So, my question to you is, would you take my hand and go on this journey with me? Will you be my life’s companion? Will you be my first mate in the ship of marriage?”
Louisa surprised herself by laughing. “I did not know you had such flowery language in you.”
Jeremy smiled back, and his face lit up like sunshine. “I am capable of a little poetry now and then.”
“Clearly. I look forward to discovering these hidden facets of you.”
“Does that mean you will marry me?”
“I think it’s implied seeing as I sat through all that,” she teased.
He threw his head back and laughed out loud before letting out a howl that startled her. He grinned at her wide and happy. “Thank you for taking a chance on me.”
He took her hand, bringing it to his lips and she felt something in her belly tighten. Surprising even herself, she leaned in and pressed her lips to his. He froze, no doubt surprised by her brazenness, before pulling her close and devouring her mouth with passion. She clung helplessly to him before remembering herself and pulling back.
They stared at each other breathing rapidly.
Louisa cast about for words to say that would take them past the temptation she could see in his eyes. A temptation she shared wholeheartedly. After all, they were to be married, what did it matter if they anticipated the marriage bed. But she thought of her father and how he would feel if he knew, and stepped back. “These last few days have been rather miserable. I thought at first, that you went courting in London. My heart felt as if it had broken in two.”
He frowned. “Why would you think I went courting?”
She shrugged, embarrassed, her cheeks stained with color. “Uncle Gilbert had mentioned something about you being betrothed. I must have misunderstood his–” she cut herself off, narrowing her eyes at him, “What is it? What was that snort about?”
“What I didn’t–”
“No, no, no, if we are to be married, we must be honest with each other. When I said my uncle’s name just now, you grimaced and snorted under your breath. Why?”
Jeremy sighed. “The other reason that I went to London was to examine my books. Since I took over the Dukedom, I have not had a chance to do so and something about your uncle just...I felt that he might not be a very honest fellow.”
“And so? Did the books in London tell you anything?”
“I have found nothing...yet. At least not against your uncle. But you should know that I suspect him as well.”
Louisa sighed. “My uncle has always been a secretive sort. But he is not a bad man.”
“Yes, well, I must be sure. I owe that responsibility to my people. Especially if he is involved in what I suspect. It goes well beyond my own holdings.”
“I understand, but I feel sure you will find him to be innocent. If he was such a scoundrel, he would not have saved my father when he collapsed.”
“In any case, I will not debate it with you. I know he is your kin and so you feel obliged to take his side.”
“It is not a matter of sides, Jeremy. I am simply saying that I do not believe he is a scoundrel.”
“And I am saying that I do!” Jeremy found that he had unintentionally raised his voice and took a deep breath to calm himself down.
She turned away, face hot with color as she also took a deep breath. She did not want to fight with Jeremy either.
“I’m sorry. I know that if you are telling me about it, you must have some sort of evidence–”
Jeremy slid his eyes away.
Her own narrowed in response. “You do have some sort of evidence, don’t you?”
Jeremy heaved a deep breath. “It’s more of a conjecture at this point but it’s quite compelling.”
“What is it?”
“He seemed to be particular friends with Mr. Fairchild, my man of business.”
“And that is all?”
“It is not so much that they are friends…I have experience in observing people conspire, you know.”
Louisa huffed and turned away, refraining from rolling her eyes with difficulty. “I see. Well…I need to get back to my fath-”
Jeremy reached out and snatched her arm. “Not yet Louisa, please. Let us keep walking a little. We have not seen the roses yet.”
Louisa hesitated a bit before nodding. “All right then, let’s go.”
They walked in silence to the bottom of the garden, arms brushing against each other, throwing occasional smiles. They came to a stop by mutual agreement by the burst of color that was the Dowager Duchess’ rose bush.
“I used to love to come here as a child. It was always peaceful. But the quiet was not silent. It was loud. Every leafy rustle as a caterpillar walked across it, the birds chirping away in the trees, insects rustling in the grass…it was a silence alive with nature and every time my father had upset me, I would come here and let the peace leach away my pain.”
Louisa turned to face him, her hand reaching out to cover his in commiseration.
“Were you a lonely child?”
Jeremy laughed. “That wasn’t really something one thought about. You just got on with it.”
“But you were?”
“Well…yes I suppose so.”
Louisa smiled sadly. “So was I. It was just my father and I growing up, and he was away a lot, traveling, painting noblemen from places as far away as the Spanish and French courts. Other times he would spend months in London at the house of one sponsor or another.”
“Where did you stay when he was away?”
“My friend Betty and her mother took me in. My father would send money from time to time,” she shrugged. “It wasn’t so bad.”
“And what about your mother?”
Louisa ducked her head. “I don’t know much about her. My father is strangely reticent about her. I can only assume that she broke his heart or died in some tragic way.”
“Wait. You don’t even know if she’s dead or alive?”
Louisa shook her head. “No. I do not.”
“And nobody in the village knows who she is? Where she might be?”
Louisa shook her head again.
“That is most strange.”
“Yes. It is. But I have had two-and-twenty years to reconcile myself to the fact that this will remain a mystery in my life.”
“I can…put out inquiries if you like.”
“Inquiries?”
“About who she might be, where she is…”
“And how would you go about getting that information?”
“Somebody must know something. It is simply a matter of retaining the right Bow Street Runner.”
“Or a former spy.”
“Yes, true.”
Louisa blinked up at him, sorely tempted to take him up on his offer. “No. My father loves me. If he has declined to tell me about this, I am sure he has a good reason.”
Jeremy shrugged. “All right. If you say so. But the offer stands.”
She reached up slowly and kissed him softly on the cheek. “Thank you.”
His face flooded with color. “You’re welcome.”
She stared at his lips, still swollen from their kisses. Her body was moving before she could really stop it and then she was in his arms and it
felt like coming home.
Now that Jeremy had brought it up, the question of her mother’s whereabouts haunted her. As she went about finishing his portrait, the atmosphere a lot lighter than it had been, she wondered if she should ask her father again. But she was keeping her own secrets. Like the fact that Jeremy was actively investigating her uncle.
They did not discuss his proposal. She knew her father was less than happy about it, letting his fears overwhelm him. They had been in agreement about one thing however. Announcing the engagement would be done closer to the wedding date. First, they needed to finish the portrait and move back to their abode. Simply for the sake of appearance because there would be talk, whatever happened, but if Louisa and her father were still at the manor house, that talk could turn nasty.
Nobody wants that.
One evening as she sat with her father in the dower cottage, slowly knitting a shawl for the winter – she had noticed that as the weather began to turn, her father got cold very fast – there was a knock at the door.
Americus had asked Jeremy to refrain from visiting her at the dower house to avoid the appearance of breached propriety. Louisa put down her knitting and went to answer, quite surprised to see her uncle on the other side. He leaped into the house and grabbed her by the arms.
“Please, you have to help me,” he groaned.
“Are you hurt?”
“N-no. I know you haven’t announced it yet, but the Duke has asked for your hand in marriage, has he not?”
“Y-yes.” Louisa did not know why she was blushing. “C-come in. Father is in the den.”
“No! I want to speak to you. You have to help me. I am your uncle.”
The uneven gait of her father’s footsteps as he walked into the hall with his walking stick had her turning to face him, with wide eyes and pale skin.
“What have you done, Gilbert?” Louisa had never heard her father’s voice sound so cold.
Gilbert just sneered, ignoring Americus to focus on Louisa. “Please speak to him.”
“Wh-what should I speak to him about?”
“Vouch for me. Tell him that I am a good man!”
“I-I-I-” Louisa’s heart fluttered anxiously, she scrambled for something to say.
“Unhand her Gilbert, this instant!” Americus roared.
Gilbert merely narrowed his eyes at his brother. “Are you sure you want to take that tone with me?”
Louisa didn’t know why but instinctively, she stepped between them. “Uncle Gilbert-”
“Louisa, go to your chamber,” Americus said, not taking his eyes off his brother.
“Father, no.” Louisa said.
Inexplicably, Gilbert snorted derisively and Americus flinched.
“Louisa, go.” Americus insisted.
She hesitated for one more moment before turning and going to her chambers. Even behind closed doors, she could hear the brothers arguing. Her father was accusing Gilbert of ‘using’ her while he said it was his birthright. It was very confusing.
Her eyes slid thoughtfully to the window and she grabbed her boots from under her bed and put them on. Then she opened the window and slipped out, taking off to the main house at a run. She could see the window of Jeremy’s study, a candle still flickering which meant he was still awake. Louisa increased her pace, entering the house through the verandah. She didn’t try to evade the myriad footmen that were located seemingly at every corner. She simply strode past them as if she had every right to be there.
Which she did.
She knocked tentatively at Jeremy’s door and waited for his voice bidding her to enter. Then she opened the door slightly and stuck her head in the door. “Good evening.”
Jeremy looked up in surprise. “Louisa! This is a pleasant surprise.”
Louisa’s shoulders relaxed as she walked further into the room. “You might not think so in a moment.”
“Why? Pray tell.”
“My Uncle Gilbert asked me to speak to you.”
Jeremy frowned. “Do not bother.”
“What…what did he do? He seems to think you are about to dismiss him.”
“Dismiss? After all he’s done? I shall do far more than dismiss him.”
“W-what has he done?”
“Nothing you need concern yourself with.”
“Bu-but why? Tell me what he has done that is so terrible.”
“Are you saying you have no idea what your uncle has been up to?” Jeremy turned to face her, his eyes narrowed with suspicion. “You defended his innocence so rigorously before. How could you not know what kind of man he is?”
“I-I-I-” Louisa simply felt attacked on all fronts. Her chest felt tight and her heart was going too fast. She couldn’t think.
Jeremy took a step toward her, watching her as if she was some dangerous creature. “Is it all a ruse? Were you supposed to distract me while he robs the entire town blind?”
“R-ro…what are you saying? I don’t understand.”
“Oh, you don’t? Then what are you doing here, Louisa?” he grabbed her around the waist, pulling her to him so that she could feel his hardness, “You come to me in the middle of the night, your hair uncovered, clad in nothing but thin muslin,” his eyes raked her décolletage hungrily, “You distract me with pleas for your uncle. What exactly is it that you’re trying to do?”
Louisa’s mouth fell open. She could not believe the accusations Jeremy was making. “This is what my father meant, when he said we are too different. If I was a lady, you would never have said such a thing to me. You would never grab me like this, whatever I was wearing.”
His hand dropped as if scalded and he took a step back, looking flustered. “I-,” he shook his head as if to clear confusion, “I…forgive me.”
Louisa whirled around and headed for the door. “I thought that we had developed a special closeness, a camaraderie that would allow us to talk like friends about issues that concern us both. Clearly I was deluding myself.” She reached for the doorknob.
“Wait! I’m sorry. You’re right. I am just…troubled.”
Louisa kept her hand on the doorknob, “Troubled about?”
Jeremy sighed. “It’s better if I show you. If you are away for a while will you be missed?”
Louisa shrugged, “I have no idea. My father and uncle are currently having some kind of disagreement and judging by the manner in which I was dismissed, my father doesn’t want to discuss it with me.”
“So he is likely to leave you alone for the rest of the night?”
“Likely yes. But that does not mean I am going to go anywhere with you. Not after what you just said, what you accused me of.”
Jeremy took a step toward her, his eyes remorseful. “Forgive me. If you want an explanation, you are going to have to trust me.”
Chapter 30
Criminal Enterprise
Jeremy could have kicked himself. He knew why he’d made that accusation. Partly, yes it was because he’d had a long difficult day in which he’d learned a few things that turned his blood to ice. But he was also a red-blooded male who was very much in love with a woman living in proximity with him. It was frustrating and very distracting. He spent his nights dreaming of her looking just the way she had when she stepped into his study.
A combination of exhaustion, mental anguish, and sexual frustration had prompted his outburst. And now he would probably pay for it with second thoughts. Jeremy didn’t think he would survive if Louisa changed her mind about marrying him.
So he had to get back in her good graces. Reaching up toward the hook on the door, he snagged his heavy winter coat and held it out to her. “It’s cold outside, you shouldn’t have run out without at least a shawl.” He said, studiously avoiding looking at her bosom.
Especially when your nipples are standing out in that way.
She narrowed her eyes suspiciously at him but stepped into the coat and fastened its buttons all the way to the top. He smirked, feeling amused and also relieved. Anything that helped
keep his libido in check was welcome.
“Now, follow me.”
Beneath his house, accessible from a wine cellar in the basement was a myriad of tunnels. His friendship with Lord Shearcaster had begun when, at eight years old, they had bumped into each other in the tunnels, both exploring from their ends. Jeremy still smiled to himself when he recalled Daniel’s scream, loud and piercing like a girl’s when he’d caught sight of Jeremy.
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