“Um, I think I just did something.” Fabian said, suddenly. “It was an accident.”
“You moron.” Abel stalked over to investigate the damage. “What did you do? If you lost our chance to find the Quintessence, I swear…”
“No.” Fabian interrupted. “At least, I don’t think I did. But, I touched the computer and it went dead.” He made a cringing “oops” sort of face. “Sorry. I wasn’t thinking.”
Abel squeezed his eyes shut. Fucking Magnet Phases and their fucking energy. “You erased the computer?” He ground out. Not that Abel had any idea how to use the thing anyway, but in principle he could’ve. It may have been vital to the mission. Why was everyone else so fucking stupid? “What if Nia left some clue as to where they were going next on there? What if it was the next step to finding the Quintessence?”
“Why would Nia do something like that?” Lansing demanded. “She’s not a moron.”
Abel shot him a glare. Once he became God, both of these idiots were on his hit list. Banished from the garden of his universe. “Just keep looking.” He ground out. He headed for the office in the back of the lab, wanting to escape their death spiral of ignorance.
The minute he passed the threshold of the office, he felt something. The echoes of power. A lot of power. Had Job been here? Had he discovered Nia’s plan and come to drag her back home?
Abel noticed that Job paid a lot of special attention to Nia. Really, Abel had always sort of wondered if Job wasn’t planning to secure himself another kingdom by trying to Phaze with her. Ty may have been the queen, but everyone knew that Nia was the real boss of the Water House. This whole Quintessence scavenger hunt had Nia’s brazen fingerprints all over it. Maybe Job thought he could convince Nia to give him a shot in the sack and see if they were a Match.
Or, maybe, Job was just a condescending, meddling old fart. Because, honestly, every time Abel tried to picture their Phazing attempt, his mind came up with a bed, some porn style lighting and two Phases staring at each other in awkward silence. Nia seemed like she’d be an incredible lay, all those red curls and that soft flesh. That audacious spark of challenge that begged for a man to bend her over and show her her place. But, Job? Nope. It was like imagining an android having sex.
Still, someone had used a huge amount of energy in the office. Abel leaned back into the main office and called for Lansing. Dust Phases could sometimes read all the invisible little specks floating in a space and tell you about things that happened there. It was a handy talent to have. Abel much preferred his own abilities as a Stone Phase, though. The power to solidify anything just rocked sometimes.
No pun intended.
“What happened in here?” Abel demanded as Lansing stepped into the office. “Can you tell?”
“Someone used a shit load of power.” Lansing summarized, instantly. “Gion? I mean that would make sense if the Air House was here. He or Job would be my first guess. Then, maybe Teja or Yuan.”
Abel held his temper with such a supreme effort of will that he might as well have already been God. “I don’t care about your guessing I want to know what you see.”
Lansing rolled his eyes and took another look around the office, his power fanning out in a smooth blanket of energy. “Darkness. Blood. A Woman.” He tilted his head. “Nia.”
“Nia and blood? She’s dead?” Well, damn. Abel hadn’t realized how much his little Nia porno imagery entertained him until now. If she’d only waited to die until after he was God that curvy little body would have been at his beck and call. God could take any woman he wanted, after all. And everyone knew that the Water House bred some of choicest, plumpest ass in the Elemental realm. Abel’s own Match had been a stick figure. Plus, Nia was his best lead on the Quintessence. Her death was a setback no matter how you looked at it.
His disappointment didn’t last long, as Lansing shook his head. “She’s alive. The Air Phases are dead, though.”
“Good.” Fabian muttered. “How’d the Water House beat them? Did Uriel…?”
“Shadows.” Lansing cut in. “That’s the power we’re feeling. I haven’t felt it in so long that…”
Abel was the one to interrupt this time. “Shadows? You mean Cross? He’s insane. The weight of the House drove him nuts. Everyone knows that.”
“He was here and he’s with Nia.” Lansing inhaled deeply as if he was smelling the room. “Holy Gaia.” His tone went from surprise to shock. “Do you feel that?”
Abel’s brows rose and Fabian’s gaze cut around the perimeter of the room. “Feel what?” They chorused.
“The energy. Fuck. He’s Nia’s Match. He started Phazing with her.” Lansing’s eyes drifted over to the desk. “Right there.”
Abel frowned, slightly. He could visualize Nia spread out on that desk, but with a lunatic like Cross? That was even worse than Job. Cross was feral. Little more than an animal or even a human. At this rate, she’d be grateful to personally worship Abel when he became God.
Fabian’s breathing got deeper. He stared at the desk as if he was picturing Nia perched on it, too, and liked what he saw. “That crazy bastard gets a Match like her? When so many Phases have nothing, why should he have a woman? Especially a woman like that?” His arousal quickly switched to anger. “I have no Match. I’ll probably never have a Match, since there are so few of us left. And Cross gets to Phaze with Nia?”
“She’s from the Water House.” Lansing shrugged. “Odds are, she’ll renounce him, anyway.”
A beeping noise sounded from the corner of the room.
Abel shoved past the other two and went to investigate. A small, human, radio-ish devise was sitting on a desk. He picked it up, trying to figure out what the hell it was and why it was chirping like that.
“It’s a fancy walkie-talkie.” Lansing explained, coming up behind him and seeing his confusion. “You think Nia and the others left it here? Maybe we can use it to track them.”
“Maybe.” Abel agreed, softly. Then, because the ends really did justify the means, he lowered himself to ask, “What does it do?”
Chapter Seven
Water, then, is the most beautiful element. It is rich in usefulness, and
purifies from all filth. Not only from the filth of the body but from
that of the soul.
John of Damascus- “An Exact Exposition of the Orthodox Faith”
Instead of fine tuning the jail break plan for her poor incarcerated family, Nia focused most of her attention on a far bigger problem: How to get her Match to hold her hand. It was incredibly irresponsible of her, since Ty, Uriel and Tharsis could be in real trouble, but Nia just couldn’t help it. Cross was keeping his distance from her and Nia didn’t like it.
It wasn’t that he was angry at her about their brief argument. Nia could’ve handled him pouting. In fact, the idea of a pouty Cross struck her as sort of cute. Unfortunately, she could tell by the way Cross was acting that it was deeper than that.
This was about the Shadows.
Cross held so much power that it scared him. He could do things that Nia had never heard of another Phase even attempting. Cross was trying to put distance between them because he thought that he was dangerous.
It was ridiculous and completely unacceptable. Nia hadn’t waited over two hundred and fifty years to find her Match just to have him pretend that she wasn’t there.
She shot Cross a sideways look, frowning at the two feet of air he’d place between them. There was exactly enough space for him to reach her easily if someone attacked, but too much for any part of her body to accidently brush his. He kept her shielded as they walked down the street, every massive inch of him standing between her and the rest of the world. His mercury gaze continually swept their surroundings, searching for danger. He was protective and solid… and he hadn’t said anything in twenty minutes.
The walk to the police station had been almost entirely silent. Cross had stopped playing the speed dating game. He looked like he was lost in his own dark thoughts
.
Nia sighed and glanced around the collection of Caribbean colored buildings that passed for Mayport Beach’s downtown. She wanted to be mad at Cross for staying so remote. She had a right to feel a little miffed. He’d apparently known she’d existed for the past two years and he’d completely ignored her.
That wasn’t particularly flattering.
Still, Nia just couldn’t find it in her to hold a grudge against him. There didn’t seem much of a point. Whatever accusations Nia might’ve thrown at him, she could just look at Cross and see that he was already thinking far worse things about himself.
He didn’t like meeting her eyes, even when she knew she had his full attention. He bled for no reason and dismissed the pain like it was an embarrassment. He held so much energy that it charged the air around him, but he wasn’t sharing it with her like he supposed to.
Her Match wasn’t broken.
Her Match wasn’t wrong.
But, her Match was hurting.
Nia was the oldest member of her House. All her life, even before the Fall, she’d been a protector. She would never, ever, allow Cross to hurt without a damn good fight. And since the big, stubborn idiot clearly wasn’t going to be building any bridges, Nia guessed she’d just have to forge the two foot gap of silence between them herself.
She stopped walking.
Cross kept going for an extra step and then noticed that she’d fallen behind. He quickly backtracked. “What happened? Are you alright?”
And voilà! Just like that she’d gotten five whole words out of him. Nia gave herself a mental pat on the back. “I’m fine.” She deliberately reached out and took hold of his palm, which was twice the size of hers. Nia’s fingers slid between his, admiring the contrast between her iridescent blue nail polish and the calluses on his broad hand. He didn’t squeeze her palm back, but he didn’t yank away, either.
Nia took it as a good sign.
Cross stared down at their entwined fingers for a second and the absolute beauty of the man, made Nia sigh. His profile should have been on a coin or something. He glanced at her through the impossible length of his lashes. “That’s not a good idea.” His voice had that wonderful rumble of Shadows. “It’s just…not.”
“I understand.” Nia gave a solemn nod. “Holding hands can be deadly. I think I’m willing to risk it, though. Just this once.” A slow grin spread across her face as Cross continued watching their joined palms like he expected some kind of trap. “Look, just try not to take my clothes off again and we’ll be fine. Well, at least, don’t do it when we’re in public.” She winked.
Cross’s gaze snapped up to hers and actually held for a moment. He almost, almost, smiled. Nia could tell.
There was an electricity to his touch that Nia knew was part of Phazing. The zing of it in the air, the proof that this man was hers, combined with the unexpected sweetness of his almost smile had Nia moving closer to him and pressing for answers. “Cross.” He enjoyed the way she said his name for some reason. She could tell by the way his pupils dilated. Nia tried to do it a lot, since it was the only thing she’d found that he liked about her, so far. “You have to try.” Her free hand came up to touch his cheek. “Why can’t you just try?”
“I am.” He whispered, but she could see that he knew exactly what she meant.
“No, you’re fighting.” Nia insisted. “You don’t want to let me in, at all. How can we Phaze like this? Just tell me what’s bothering you and I can help.” If he didn’t open up to her, how would they get to know one another? How could they trust and connect? Matches had to accept each other for all their strength and weaknesses. Had to understand the Phase they were committing themselves to spend forever with.
Nia wanted more than just a Phase-Match. She wanted love and she wanted Cross to give it to her.
Cross’ eyes slid away from hers. “Let’s just go bail out your family and worry about our Match later.” He wasn’t going to budge. There was an inflexible set to his jaw that pretty much told her that Cross planned to keep that two feet of air between them forever.
Nia let her hand drop from his face. “You don’t want me for a Phase-Match.” His gaze slashed back to hers and she nodded. “You don’t. I can tell. But, that’s just too bad. I’m keeping you and if you try to renounce me, I’ll fight it. Understand? You’re stuck with me, so you’d better just deal with it.”
Cross actually laughed. It wasn’t a particularly happy laugh. In fact, it had a jagged edge of menace to it, but at least it was a genuine response. “You think I don’t fucking want you?” He challenged, harshly. “No, actually, you’re right. I don’t want you. You’re the only thing in the universe I give a shit about and just the idea of you has kept me alive for the past two years. So no.” He shook his head. “It’s not want, Nia. It’s fucking need. I need you so badly that there’ve been times I’ve wished that I never felt you at all, because then I could’ve just let go! I could’ve just ended it after the Fall!”
It was hard to say which of them looked more stunned by that outburst.
Nia stared up at him, speechless. Reading between the lines of that, she saw something terrible. Cross had wanted to die. Panic spread through Nia. She’d just found him. If he left her, she would be alone again.
Cross’ jaw sagged for a second as if he couldn’t believe what he’d said. Then, his mouth snapped shut again, so hard his teeth clinked together.
“I’m sorry.” Cross yanked his hand back from hers. “I’m… Shit.” He pressed a hand to his forehead and turned swiftly. “Hang on.” Blood was coming out of his nose this time. “God.” He curved in on himself as if battling some invisible demon.
“Cross!” Nia closed the distance between them and grabbed his face between her palms. “It’s okay. Calm down.” She felt the tension leave his body when she touched him, like a horrible pressure had been released. “You’re okay. It’s okay.” She was chanting that more for herself than for him as she petted his cheek.
The bleeding stopped and Cross wiped a wrist under his nose in an absent gesture that spoke of long habit. He started down at the red stain and his mouth tightened. “I’m always coming to you with blood on me.” He murmured, wearily. “Selfish bastard.”
“It’ll be okay.” Nia insisted. “Just so you’re not sick, you’ll be okay.” Phases hadn’t bled like that during the Fall, but Nia had lost so much that it left her traumatized. Even with his assurance that Freya had checked him out, Nia couldn’t get the image of some illness stealing Cross away out of her mind. “Please, don’t be sick.” Her voice caught at the idea.
To Nia’s surprise, Cross sighed and rested his head against her shoulder. “I’m not sick, baby. But, I’m not okay, either.” Cross was so much bigger than Nia that he had to bend almost in half to hold onto her, but he still didn’t let go. “I told you, I’m broken.” He swore, softly. “I never meant to yell at you. I’m sorry.”
Nia could’ve cried at the sadness in his tone. “We’re Matched, Cross. We’re allowed to yell at each other. But, we are never allowed to let go. Are you listening to me? Don’t you ever end anything and leave me behind.”
“If I ended everything, Nia, you’d come with me.” There was a dull note in his voice. “That’s always been the problem.”
“Yeah? Good.” She certainly wasn’t going to apologize if she’d screwed up his suicide plans. “Jackass.” She muttered and tilted her head so her face rested in his thick, dark hair. “Matches need each other, you know. It’s not just you in this. I need you, too. I need you here.”
He snorted as if that statement was a prime candidate for the “stupidest thing ever said” award.
“Cross, why do you have these headaches?” Nia demanded, when he didn’t seem to be offering anything else to the conversation. “Did Freya tell you why?”
A long pause then, “The Shadows are heavy.”
Nia couldn’t imagine the power it took to support an entire House. It had to be the worst pressure in the world, times
three. She should have known that it would hurt him. What kind of Match was she that she hadn’t guessed that he was suffering? “You’re in pain a lot?”
An even longer pause. “Sometimes.”
Nia hadn’t spent two years arguing with the rest of the Council to easily admit defeat. “When are you not in pain?”
No answer at all this time.
“Cross?” She prompted. “When are you not in pain?”
He straightened away from her and met her gaze dead on. “When I touch you, the headaches go away.”
“Ah-ha!” Nia beamed, despite the circumstances. “Well, my medical opinion on that is that we should do a lot of touching then, Match.” She arched a brow, trying to lighten his mood. “You’re cured. You so owe me.”
He didn’t seem amused. “I know that I do. If I were a better man, I’d pay you back by letting you go. You shouldn’t be with me.”
Nia’s smile faded. “Cross, are you going to try and renounce me?” She demanded.
“No.”
The simple finality of the word sent a shaft of pleasure into Nia. “Then, I think you need to adapt.” She made sure that she kept her hand on his arm. “You have to be my Match.”
His gaze stayed locked on hers. “It’s not that I don’t want to be your Match, Nia. It’s that I can’t. Not the way you need me to be. That’s the problem. I’m wrong.”
“No, you’re not wrong!” She insisted. “Stop saying that.” Nia suddenly and completely understood Ty’s refusal to Phaze with Parald. Her cousin had always said he’d felt “wrong” and now that made perfect sense to Nia. Matches could feel each other on so many levels. You’d be able to tell instantly if he was a monster. You’d know if he was wrong. “Cross, if you would just…”
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