by Betsy Poole
I knew that Ila was right and I knew that she was talking sense. But, this didn’t mean that I wasn’t angry. I felt like a fool and I felt terrible about the whole thing.
“I still want to go to the mansion and I want to talk to Sheila about the whole thing. I know this may be a really bad idea. I am sure that this will lead to bad consequences but darling, I can’t be at ease until I know what actually happened.”
It’s been three days since we had come back from the mansion, and I had closely followed the news. When there was no mention of any kind of surveillance footage and the police were still on the lookout for Ila, I had realized that Sheila hadn’t handed over the footage to the police.
Also, we had changed our location because I knew that Rick would have conveyed our coordinates to the police. If he really wanted the police to track us down, he could do it in a heartbeat. Of course, I couldn't guess what he wanted and I didn’t know what he was planning to do. That being said, I couldn’t take such a huge risk.
So, we had shifted to another home quite far from where he had been staying. I asked Ila to take care of herself and not to open the doors no matter what. I promised to be back soon as all I needed to do was to talk to Sheila and find out what the matter was!
I knew that there was a part of Ila that didn’t want me to go the Vecchio mansion because she was skeptical that I would have sex with Sheila. She had seen how persistent Sheila could be and she didn't want that to happen.
I turned around, kissed her and whispered in her ears, “I am only yours, darling. Don’t worry about me cheating on you, that is never going to happen. I belong to you.”
In the last few days, I had been with Ila, I had fallen even more in love with her. We made a little life for ourselves and everything we did was together. It helped us know a lot more about each other. Although, we did spend a lot of time together before, but somehow there was so much that we needed to know. So, we had spent the last few days simply talking to each other and exploring each other’s lives.
In my opinion, love truly is that feeling when you can talk of some of the most boring things about a person, like how they suck at mathematics or the way you always want to hear their voice no matter how tired you are and how your obsession with green eyes makes you a dork.
I love when even when you are having these little and meaningless conversation, the other person still listens to all of it and doesn’t minds being with you. Love for me is that little thing that happens in your heart when you know that regardless of what the future holds for the two of you, you want to keep what you have because it is that which makes your today beautiful.
I learned from Ila that love was when despite all the differences, the problems, the communication gap, the past and the uncertain future, you battle it out for your present. It was not easy for Ila to accept love. She had always been used for her body and had not once been loved. When you are with someone who has never been loved, they can be really hard to love. This is because they feel everything with a lot of depth.
I knew that loving Ila was a dangerous thing. She would experience every emotion with double the depth and leaving her would break her completely. This is because such people do not know what it feels to let go, they do not know the color of a broken heart, but when love happens, you are not worried about these facts. All you care is for the person and you are willing to do ever damn thing, good or bad.
I knew I was knee deep in love with Ila and there was no changing the fact. Yes, we had both screwed a lot of people and we had done our fair share of mistakes. I had a long line of regrets and so did she and we had even called each other names, but, despite everything, when I thought of who I wanted to be with, it was Ila who I always dreamt of.
She had made a home in my heart and despite feeling that I had been one of those wanderer souls with no place to call my own, I wanted to be with her. I had hurt her a lot of times and even judged her for things she did and even the ones she didn’t, but she was not angry with me for any of those because despite everything and the odds, Ila too loved me.
Ila Stills had fallen for me and it was one of the most majestic and beautiful things to have happened to me. I had to fight for her because losing her would break me. When I had come so close to losing her as Rick had drugged her and had sex with her, I had been shit scared. When you lose something or someone you heart dearly, you realize that you are prepared to give up everything, change who you are as a person and do whatever it take just to have the person back.
It was my moment of realization and I had decided right then that I would do anything to have Ila. She was my whole damn world and nothing mattered more to me.
I thought all these things on my way to the Vecchio mansion. I had so many things to do. I wondered at what possible options I had if this one didn’t work out. I was furious at Sheila because I knew that she must have done a mistake.
When I hadn't found any news about the footage, my first thought was that Rick may have killed Sheila. This wouldn’t have surprised me in the least because Rick was a monster and he could kill anyone.
But, the police reports hadn’t mentioned any new murder and I realized that Sheila was alive and this meant that she never handed over the footage. I suspected her and I needed answers and she was the only one who could solve this mystery.
I had been at the Vecchio mansion for a long time and I had known Sheila all the while. Yes, she was sex obsessed and she always wanted a lot of money, but she wasn’t evil. When she had promised me that she would deliver the footage and she was aware of the details, I figured she would have done it unless she was paid a hefty amount.
I remembered one of the PI cases I had wherein I had collected ample evidence against the guy I was investigating. I had caught him red-handed having weird sex with a younger girl. However, when he had come to my room and had offered me a lot more than his wife who was spying on him and even given me share from his company, I had double-crossed his wife. I had made a clean report on the guy and gave all evidence to him and piled money from both of them.
I was the same guy who I wished that Sheila wasn’t and this made me sound like a hypocrite. I had never hated karma more than this before. I could feel how we all needed to pay for our sins.
I knew that I should have lived a better life. The only thing that I was thankful for was the fact that I still hadn’t taken a life. Somehow I had never wanted to be a killer. Perhaps, this was one reason as to whey I didn’t end up being in the police. I still remembered the time when my hands had shivered when I had to pull the trigger on Rick’s mom. I was scared of killing people and I didn’t want to be the killer.
As I headed to the mansion, I stood outside the place. I have come back here so many times and each time, I had got some information. It had always been eventful. I wondered what was in store for me now.
Once again, when I entered the secret wing and found Sheila, I saw that she was a little ashamed.
“Care to explain Sheila why you didn’t hand the footage?” I asked and there was no humor in my voice.
She didn’t bother to answer but started to leave.
I held her hand and turned her back and I wondered what she was up to.
“Mr. Larry McGee, I am not answerable to you. Leave me alone.”
“Wow, that is an awesome reply. After all, I did for you and all the time I had known you, all you tell me is that you don’t really owe me an explanation. I trusted you, Sheila, for goddamn sake. My girlfriend’s life is at stake here. If you weren’t willing to help me, you should have told me about it.”
I thought she would refute or she would come up with an excuse or she would throw her body at me and ask for sex, but Sheila shocked me by bursting in a pool of inconsolable tears. She was inconsolable and as she kept crying, I had no idea what to do or what to say.
I tried to console her and I had to wait for her to feel better. I knew that something was definitely wrong and I wanted nothing more but to know what exactly had hap
pened.
“Hey you okay? What happened, Sheila?” I asked and I hated everything about it. I was tired of the somersaulting emotions I was going through. I mean, couldn’t life be simpler? I already had enough shit to deal with and to add to it, the problems of Sheila was surely a disaster.
I wondered what would have happened and she sobbed and said something which I couldn’t understand.
“Sheila, I can’t understand what you are telling, please tell me what happened.”
“I am so sorry. I don’t know what happened after you went. Rick came here. I didn’t want to be with him. I was sure I would push him out, but he gave me something and I don’t know I woke up a lot later and I don’t know anything that happened. It is like no matter how hard I try, I just can’t understand what has happened. I had never been like this. I woke upon naked and I had a lot of love marks on my body which meant that I had sex, but I don’t even know with whom I had sex.
I know I have an addiction to sex and I like sleeping with people, but I felt like I was raped because I had sex and I don’t even know. When I woke up, there was no one and all the footage was gone. There was nothing I could do. I wanted to call you, but I didn’t know what to say, I feel really miserable. I am tired of all this. I felt like I am a terrible person.”
I didn’t have to think a lot to guess who did it.
“Sheila, don’t beat yourself up. I know exactly what happened. Rick is a drug maker, Sheila. I suppose you already know green ruins was made by him. Green ruins ended up giving people an enhanced sex drive. All those who ended up having green ruins found an uncanny need to fuck each other and this is what may have made you such a sex addict.
Not only this, Rick went ahead and started making silver salt. This is a new drug he has recently made and not many know about it. He killed Anthony because he came to know of this new drug. The silver salt is even more potent than the green ruins. Not only does it make you crave for sex, but your whole body would go into a trance and at the same time, it makes you forget.
When you recover from the impact of the drug, you will have absolutely no memory of the whole event and no matter how hard you try, you are not going to recall any of it. This is exactly what he did to you, Sheila. I am sorry I shouted at you. You were just caught unaware and I am sorry that I didn’t warn you before.
Knowing Rick, I knew that he could go to any length and it was my responsibility to have told you the whole thing. I am so sorry babe. I am really sorry. Stop beating yourself, we will figure something out.”
Sheila sobbed and she was sorry for all that had happened. I could feel how much she regretted the whole thing. Although I knew that it was not Sheila’s fault, this didn’t change the fact that I had lost the evidence.
How would I save Ila, I wondered and I wanted to check the footage one more time. Maybe, Rick had been a little careless and I wished that he had left some kind of evidence behind. I knew that the probability of finding any footage was going to be very slim but I didn’t want to give up on the chance.
I wanted to make sure that I tried my chances and so I started checking the videos that were there. Sheila wanted to help me desperately and this is why she excavated all possible videos and started looking at them.
I appreciated the gesture and I wanted nothing more to have some piece of evidence.
“I feel so bad for Ila. I am so sorry Larry. I am sorry that I am the reason you can’t save her now. I should have been more careful.”
I had nothing to add to it. I knew that she was at fault but she didn’t do any of it purposely. I wanted to console her, but I had to focus on the evidence.
“Did you hear anything from Rick? Do you remember him telling you anything? Can you try to recollect any of the things he told you?” I asked out of sheer desperation when I knew that there were no odds of her remembering anything.
I had seen Ila and how she had no remembrance of anything that had happened to her. So, there was no chance of Sheila remembering a word of what Rick said. Still, the desperation of knowing the details made me ask her. I didn’t want to give up so easily.
After spending an hour at the mansion, I realized that there was nothing here. Sheila did give me a few tapes and I decided that I would take them home and see it again. Even a minor trace of some information may help me out.
***
As soon as I reached our place, Ila was waiting for me anxiously. I knew she had been hoping against hope that I would get something out of the whole mess. Oh, I had wanted too and I knew that if Sheila had been hiding evidence, I would have got it from her anyhow. But, then what could I do if that bastard Rick played that kind of a trick.
I was left shattered and when I saw her honey brown eyes, my heart broke at the pain I felt. She had so much hope in me. I remembered how I had once saved Ila in Arizona.
She used to joke and call me ‘my savior’ but then would I fail at saving Ila one more time. I had taken a lot of pride when she used to call me a savior and it was way better than being called an investigator.
I looked at her and I knew that I was no longer her savior. I had come so close to saving her and in the end, Rick snatched all evidence right under my nose and flew away.
“It’s okay Larry. You don’t need to be sorry about it. You tried your best. I am not depressed,” Ila said and kissed me.
I didn’t even have to tell her that I had lost. She could read it from my expression and this was something that had hurt me even more. I was sad and I knew deep within, she was sad too.
Losing the evidence meant that we could never live in peace. There would always be a little something hanging at the back of our mind and no matter where we went, it would always lead to some kind of confusion and fear in my mind.
“I am so sorry Ila for failing you. I am tired of being the wrong person. I used to be so good at my job. I had got the evidence. I was selfish not to have gone to the police because I thought that this might expose me. I feel like a complete asshole.”
Ila probably sensed that I was really venerable and weak and she knew what I needed wasn’t comforting words. We had sex a few time before, but this time, Ila didn’t want to have sex with me. Ila wanted to make love to me because she knew that it was love and love alone that could drive the numbness and the pain that we both were feeling.
“Tonight, I am going to make love to all parts of you and you would be healed. This would drive out all your pain and it will help you feel better again. We have had sex too many times but tonight it will be different. Tonight, I will kiss you like I taste a forever in you and we will forge a bond so strong that regardless of what destiny has in store for me or us, we would never be apart. I am going to write my name in your heart today with all the love I have for you and this will never fade away.”
I had never felt or heard anything which was even remotely as beautiful as this and I wanted nothing more but to live in the moment. I wanted to be with her and I wanted to forget every other worry for the time being.
I looked into her eyes and kissed her red lips. She immediately parted and I pushed my tongue in. We kept on exploring the depth of each other’s mouth and we were in a state of trance, but it wasn’t induced by any drugs, it was because of the love we two had for each other.
She met me stroke for stroke and we kept on kissing like the world had stopped and it could only be revived by the passion of our kiss. I let my hands in her long and beautiful hair and she did the same thing with me except my hair was short and chopped.
After kissing each other hungrily and sharing the same passion and spark, Ila knew that she had to get rid of the pain I felt and the way I took the blame on me.
She gestured me to follow her and she seductively started moving towards the bed. Once she spread on the bed, she crossed her legs and gave me the right peek-a-boo which made me wish I could kiss the shit out of her.
I jumped on the bed and got her out of her clothes. She willingly let everything down and in less than a minute, she was
naked – completely naked and mine.
“You are beautiful, Ila Stills,” I whispered in her ears and gently licked her earlobes. I could feel the way her body shivered and I knew that she loved it.
She put her hands on my shirt and started to unbutton it slowly, one by one. As she kept on unbuttoning my shirt, I kissed her neck and she was turned on. We were not in a rush as we were not looking for hot and hungry sex. We simply stayed in that moment and wanted to take our own sweet time registering this moment and eternalizing it for the life which we were about to live.
She threw away my shirt and then proceeded to wrestle me out of my trouser. As she unzipped my trouser, she felt my boner and giggled like a little child. Every time Ila giggled, she looked really young and innocent. She would have been one of those carefree girls if she hadn’t fallen prey to the green ruins.
Ila had the childlike innocence but she had a hard life because of some wrong choices and a few mistakes. However, tonight it wasn’t about brooding over the past. Tonight, it was all about thinking of the present and to live in that moment.
“How badly do you want me, Larry?” Ila asked and my boner had the answer for her.
“Look at that erection down there. It shows how much I need you,” I said in what I thought was my sexiest voice.
Ila took my dick in her hands and she held it firmly yet gently. I knew that Ila was looking to help me out of my mood and I appreciated all she did. I knew that this was perhaps the first time, she was being so gentle during sex and she may have been the woman to have fucked too many men, but she too hardly knew what making love felt like.
In a way, we were both rediscovering each other and finding a lot of new ways to love. She massaged my balls and then slowly climbed to the top of the dick and flicked the sensitive skin there.
“Oh God Ila! You will kill me! Goodness you are such a sex kitten, I need you so badly,” I said and I knew that I was incoherent.