Liam goes around pretending everything is just dandy when it’s anything but. And you—sometimes I think you’ve simply given up.
Fiona’s words were still rattling around in his head and though Conall tried to tell himself they were simply a mother expressing dissatisfaction with her sons, he had to admit she was, at least, partially right. He couldn’t speak for Liam, but as for himself, he supposed he had given up on some aspects of his life.
Didn’t his mother realize it was easier for him to focus on his work instead of the mess he’d made of his personal life? The mess he would make if he tried to marry again?
You should be doing all of that for a family of your own. Not us.
Close on the heels of his mother’s words, Vanessa traipsed through his mind, reminding him just how much she and the twins had changed his life, had reopened the old dreams and wishes that he’d started out with as a young man.
Although he’d talked with Vanessa on the phone about hiring the nanny, he’d not seen her since the night Rick had burped all over him. Every night since then, he’d wanted to go back to her house. He’d wanted to sit across from her at the little table, eat warm tortillas, talk about mundane things and simply watch her beautiful face. Over and over he’d thought about the way she’d felt in his arms when he’d kissed her and the way she’d looked afterward. For the first time in a long time he’d wanted to make love to a woman. And though he’d told himself he’d been too busy to make the trip over to Tinnie to see her, a part of him knew he’d been hiding these past few days, afraid to admit to himself or to her that she and the babies were the family he’d wanted for so long.
Three days later, Vanessa was relieved that Friday had finally arrived. If she didn’t get out of the office and away from Conall soon, she was either going to break into pieces or throw herself into his arms and beg the man to make love to her. Neither option was suitable for a secretary who’d always considered herself a professional. And she was beginning to wonder if the job she’d once loved was now going to have to come to an end.
Drawing in a bracing breath, she rapped her knuckles on the door separating their offices. The moment she heard him calling for her to enter, she stepped into his domain and shut the door behind her.
“I have the contract for the trucking company ready for you to sign,” she said as she approached his desk. “I’ve also alerted Red Bluff that a new trucking company will be in place at the mine by the middle of next month.”
“Good. I’m glad to get that settled.” He glanced up as she leaned forward to place the papers in front of him. “Did Red Bluff seem to have any problem with the idea of new haulers?”
It was after five in the evening and though he’d started out the day in a crisply starched shirt and matching tie, the tie was now loosened and the top two buttons of his shirt were undone while the sleeves were rolled back on his forearms. His nearly black hair was rumpled and she knew if she were to rub her cheek against his, she’d feel the faint rasp of his beard.
“Not at all,” she said as she straightened to her full height and tried to bring her thoughts to the business at hand.
“Good. I only wish raising racehorses was as easy as digging gold from a mountainside.” He picked up a pen and scratched his name on the appropriate lines. Once he was finished, he handed the document back to her and smiled. “But my grandfather used to say that nothing was worthwhile, unless it was earned. Gold mines eventually peter out. Horses will always be.”
“Yes, well, I’ll get this in the outgoing mail before I leave this evening,” she told him, then quickly turned to start out of the room.
She’d taken two steps when his hand closed around her upper arm and with a mental groan, she turned to face him.
“Was there something else?” she asked.
Grimacing at her businesslike tone, he muttered, “Hell, yes, there’s plenty more! I want to know why you’ve been acting as though I have a contagious disease. Ever since you’ve started back to work, you’ve been tiptoeing around me like I’m some sort of hulking monster.”
Shaking her head, she looked away from him and swallowed hard. “I’m sorry if it appears that way, Conall. But I’m just trying to keep things in order.”
“What does that mean?”
“It means—” Her gaze slipped to her arm, where his fingers were pressed like dark brown bands around her flesh. “I’m trying to keep our relationship professional here in the office.”
He stepped closer and her heart began to knock against her ribs. “What if I don’t want it to be professional?” he asked softly.
She cleared her throat, but it didn’t clear away the huskiness in her voice when she spoke. “Like I told you before, Conall, we can’t—”
Before she could get the rest of her words out, he jerked her forward and into his arms. The instant his lips covered hers, Vanessa understood why she’d been fighting so hard to keep this very thing from happening.
Tasting his kiss again, having his arms holding her close against his hard body, felt incredibly delicious and impossible to resist. She couldn’t hide or ignore the desire rushing through her, urging her to open her mouth to his and slip her arms up and around his neck.
All at once the kiss heated, deepened and surrounded her senses in a hot fog. The room receded to a dim whirl around her head. She heard his groan and then his hands were sliding down her back, splaying against her buttocks and dragging her hips toward his.
Crushed in the intimate embrace, Vanessa forgot they were in his office and that anyone could walk in on them. She forgot, that is, until the phone in her office began to ring and stop, then ring again.
Summoning on all the strength she could find, she jerked her mouth from his. “Conall—the phone, I—”
“Forget the phone,” he ordered huskily as his mouth descended toward hers for a second time. “The caller can leave a message.”
Panicked by just how much she wanted to do his bidding, she burst out, “No!”
Twisting away from his embrace she started to hurry out of the room, but halfway to the door, she realized at some point during their kiss she’d dropped the contract.
Turning back, she groaned when she spotted it lying to one side of his boots. As she walked toward him to retrieve it, he said softly, “That was a quick change of mind.”
“I haven’t changed my mind.” She bent down to retrieve the typed pages that were held together with a heavy paper clip. “I’m retrieving the contract. That’s all.”
Gripping the document with both hands, she straightened back to her full height and before she could step away his hand came out to catch her by one elbow.
“All right, Vanessa, you can pretend you’re indifferent, but I won’t believe it,” he murmured.
She swallowed as her heartbeat reacted to his nearness. “Conall, I’m not going to deny that I like kissing you. But—”
“Good,” he interrupted before she could go on. “Because I plan on us doing a lot more of it.”
“No,” she repeated. “It won’t take us anywhere. Except to bed!”
A corner of his mouth curled upward. “For once we agree on something.”
She stared at him as her mind spun with questions and images that left her face burning with red heat. “Well, you might as well go over to your desk and write this down on your calendar, Conall—it ain’t gonna happen!”
He laughed in a totally confident way, but instead of the sound irking her, it sent a scare all the way down to her feet. To make love to Conall would be the end of her. He’d have her eating out of his hand, waiting and begging for any crumbs of affection he might throw her way.
“You look very pretty when you use bad grammar. Did you know that?”
She muttered a helpless curse and then the phone began to ring again. “The one thing I do know is that I have to get back to work and—”
“No. You don’t. It’s quitting time,” he said, his voice quickly slipping back to boss mode. “And rig
ht now I want to speak with you about tomorrow night.”
She arched her brows at him. “Tomorrow night? Are you having a special meeting or something and I need to attend to take notes?”
He shook his head. “Not even close. Sunday is Grandmother Kate’s birthday and the family is throwing her a party. Not anything as huge as we did for her eightieth. But since this is her eighty-fifth we thought she deserved more than just a cake and a few gifts from her family.”
“What does this have to do with me? You’d like for me to pick up a gift or flowers for you to give to her?”
He frowned. “Not hardly. I know how to buy gifts for women. Even one as hard to please as Kate.” His hand departed her elbow and began a hot glide up her bare arm and onto her shoulder. “I’d like for you to attend the party with me. Will Hannah be available to watch after the twins?”
He was inviting her to his family home? As his companion? She couldn’t believe it. Sure, as a young teenager she’d been inside the small mansion many times. But that had been totally different. She’d been there as Maura’s friend, not as a so-called date for the eldest Donovan son.
“So far I can’t get Hannah to take any time off, so she will be available. But I’m not keen on the idea of being away from the babies for that long. I know that probably sounds silly to you, but just being apart from them while I’m here at the office has been hard for me to deal with these past three days.”
He smiled with understanding. “It’s not silly. You’re a new mother. But it’s not a problem, either. You can bring the twins to the party with you.”
Her jaw dropped. “To the party? Conall, they’re only a few weeks old.”
“I’m well aware of how old they are. Everyone will love seeing them. In fact, the whole family has been asking about them.”
How could she turn down the invitation now, she wondered, without appearing to be indifferent to his family? She couldn’t. “If you think no one will mind,” she said hesitantly.
“Grandmother will love seeing the babies. Bring Hannah, the nanny, too,” he added. “That way you won’t be babysitting the whole time. And Hannah is acquainted with Maura and Bridget, so I’m sure she’ll enjoy the outing, too.”
Another reason why she couldn’t refuse, Vanessa thought wryly. Hannah, the nanny that Conall had hired for the twins, was a lovely widow and worked tirelessly to keep the babies healthy and happy. So far she’d not taken a night off for any reason and Vanessa knew the woman needed a break of some sort.
“All right. We’ll be there. But I don’t understand any of this, Conall. Why invite me? Now? Since I’ve come to work for you, your family has held several parties for one reason or another. You didn’t ask me to attend any of those,” she couldn’t help pointing out.
“Look, Vanessa, whatever you might think or want, the two of us aren’t going back to the impersonal relationship we had before the twins arrived. Things have changed with you and with me. Surely I don’t have to spell that out to you.”
Things have changed. That was certainly an understatement, she thought. If she wasn’t with the man, she was thinking about him. And when she was with him all she could think about was being in his arms. She was in a predicament that was very unhealthy to her state of mind and try as she might, she couldn’t seem to do a thing about it.
“I think—” She broke off abruptly as the phone began to ring again.
“You think what?” he prompted.
She shook her head. Now wasn’t the time or place to say the things she needed to say to him. Tomorrow night would be soon enough to let him know he was sniffing around the wrong tree. “Nothing. I’ll be at the party, Conall. With Rose and Rick. Right now I’m going to get this contract in the mail, then go home.”
He looked like he wanted to say more, or maybe it was more kissing he had on his mind. Whatever it was she read on his face, she didn’t hang around to let him put his wants into action. She hurried out of the room and purposely shut the door between them.
Apparently Mother Nature didn’t want to disappoint the Donovans. With Kate’s party being held in the backyard beneath the pines and the cottonwood trees, the early August weather couldn’t have been more perfect. Even the mosquitoes seemed to forget to come out after night had fallen and the colorful party lanterns were glowing festively over the tables of food that had been served more than an hour ago.
Conall had told her the party was going to be small, but to Vanessa it was anything but. People, most of whom she didn’t know, filled the yard and the back porch where Kate was presently ensconced in a rattan chair surrounded by family and friends. Music was playing and down by the pool the more active guests were laughing and splashing and swimming in the crystal blue water.
Tilting the long-stemmed glass to her lips, Vanessa drained the last of her punch while wondering how soon she could leave without appearing unsociable. She’d already spoken to Kate and expressed her well wishes. She’d chatted at length with Maura and exchanged a few words with the rest of the Donovans. Except for Conall. So far she’d seen him for all of two minutes and that had been when his grandmother had blown out the candles on her cake. After that, he’d disappeared into the house and left her wondering for the umpteenth time why he’d invited her in the first place.
Moving from her spot beneath a giant pine, she started walking toward the far end of the porch where the twins were sleeping in their double stroller. A few steps away, Hannah and Bridget were engaged in a lively conversation, but both women looked around as she approached.
“Vanessa, come have a seat with us,” Bridget insisted. “Hannah was just telling me what it’s like at the twins’ bath time.”
Vanessa laughed. “I can tell you in one word. Chaos. And in a few weeks I’m sure it’s going to get a lot wilder and a whole lot wetter.”
She started toward an empty chair to the left of the two women, but before she reached the seat, a hand came down on the back of her shoulder. At the same time Bridget said, “Conall, it’s about time you showed your face around here. Where have you been anyway?”
“Business, as usual,” he answered. “A phone call I couldn’t ignore. But that’s finished and now I’m more than ready for a piece of cake. What about you, Vanessa?”
Turning toward him, she tried not to notice how sexy he looked in close-fitting jeans and a black T-shirt that clung to his hard torso and exposed his muscled arms. “I’ve already had more than my share,” she told him.
“Then you can come watch me have my share,” he said with a grin for her, “but first I want a look at Rose and Rick. Are they enjoying the party?”
“At least they’re not howling,” Hannah answered with a laugh.
He moved over to the stroller and squatted on his heels in front of the twins. Rick was asleep, his head tilted toward his sister’s. But Rose was awake, her blue eyes wide, her arms pumping through the air as though she could hear the music.
“Hey, little doll, your brother is missing the party. But you’d like to dance, wouldn’t you,” he said in a soft voice to the baby girl. Not bothering to ask permission, he eased Rose from her side of the stroller and cradled her in the crook of his arm. Then after letting her tiny fingers curl around his forefinger, he began to slowly two-step around the porch.
“Aww, look,” Bridget gushed, her gaze resting fondly on her brother and the baby in his arms. “She loves that, Conall.”
“So do I,” he replied with a broad grin. “I’ve never had a better dance partner. She’s not even complaining about me stepping on her toes.”
“We need him around when Rose is crying at two o’clock in the morning,” Hannah joked to Vanessa.
Her eyes taking in the precious sight of Conall dancing with her daughter, Vanessa felt her throat thicken with unexpected emotions. Years ago, she’d often dreamt of Conall waltzing her around a ballroom floor. Back then she could have never imagined him holding her baby, dancing her around as though she was a special princess.
&nbs
p; “He wouldn’t be any use to you then,” Bridget observed. “My brother sleeps like a rock.”
Dismissing his sister’s remark with a chuckle, Conall carried Rose back to the stroller. After he’d placed her back beside his brother, he pressed a kiss on her chubby cheek. “Thank you for the dance, little Rose.”
To Vanessa it seemed as though he remained bent over the babies for an exceptionally long time before he finally straightened and walked back over to her. After placing his hand around Vanessa’s arm, he nodded to the other two women. “Excuse us, ladies.”
He guided Vanessa off the porch and across the yard to where a table held a massive three-tiered cake and an assortment of beverages.
“Sorry I had to leave the party,” he said as he gathered a plate and fork. “Have you been bored?”
“No. But I should be leaving soon. By the time Hannah and I get home with the babies, it will be getting late.”
“You can’t leave yet.”
She watched him ladle a huge hunk of cake onto the plate. “Why? Is your family waiting to give your grandmother a surprise gift?”
“No. Kate doesn’t want gifts. Says she has everything she wants. Personally, I think she needs a man in her life, but then she’d be hell to put up with, if you know what I mean.”
Vanessa folded her arms against her breasts as he began to wolf down the cake. “No. I don’t know what you mean. Kate might be strict and opinionated, but she wouldn’t marry a man unless she loved him.”
His brows lifted faintly as he looked at her. “You’re probably right. She was crazy about Granddad, which always amazed me because he was a mean old cuss most of the time.”
“I doubt he was mean to her. Kate is too strong of a woman to put up with that.”
“Yes, but—”
“But what?”
His expression was nothing but cynical as he glanced at her. “Love makes people put up with behavior they wouldn’t ordinarily tolerate.”
Was he speaking from experience? Vanessa wasn’t about to ask. Even though things had changed between them these past few weeks, he wasn’t the type of man who poured out his personal life to anyone, including her.
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