by CJ Morrow
He stopped speaking, his eyes flicking left and right as he replayed the past.
‘Would you like a drink?’ Lily asked, getting up, feeling embarrassed for his evident pain.
‘If you’re having one,’ he said.
She made them both coffee and reached for her emergency stash of chocolate biscuits, the ones she kept in a tin on the highest shelf. But try as she might she couldn’t reach, she’d have to get a chair – climbing on the chair was part of the emergency procedure, if she couldn’t reach them, she wouldn’t eat them unless absolutely necessary.
‘Let me help,’ Jackson said from behind her, reaching up with ease and pulling the tin down. He was too close, far too close. ‘Only to be opened in emergencies,’ he read from the tin lid. ‘Is this an emergency?’
Lily nodded. ‘I think so.’ She moved away from him, moved away from the heat and scent of his body.
‘I left London after the divorce,’ he continued once they were back in the sitting room sipping coffee. ‘Gave up my job and spent my share of the house sale on the cottage in Devon. We’d done well; property prices had risen much faster in London than anywhere else in the country, so I could buy the cottage outright. I spent what cash I had left doing it up. Oh, and I bought the café where my aunts work – it was going to close down otherwise.’
‘And the beach hut?’ Lily asked, allowing herself to enjoy the memory.
‘I already owned that. Well, strictly speaking my sister, Beth, and I co-owned it; it was left to us by our grandparents. Now it’s just mine.’ He stopped speaking for a moment, then shook himself, and grabbed his second emergency chocolate biscuit. ‘I surfed most days and when winter came I followed the surf around the world. My father kept telling me that if I really didn’t want to go back to The City, I should go work in the family business. I didn’t want to; I really had had enough of all it.’
‘Until you came to Bensons,’ Lily added, wistfully.
‘Yeah. I felt obliged. It should have been Beth who came to Bensons. Beth was my father’s number two. She’d been in the business almost since childhood. Worked there every school holiday, every college holiday, during university. She loved it. Always had. She loved working with our dad.’ He stopped speaking, the silence in the room seemed to go on for minutes.
‘So where is she now?’ Lily prompted.
‘She died.’ His voice was flat, as though he’d practised this line a thousand times.
‘I’m sorry.’
‘It was stupid. How she died, I mean. There was a storm; she went out and rode fierce waves on her own when I was on the other side of the world. I should have been there. It was a Bank Holiday weekend, we always spent those together surfing. Mireille never liked the beach or the sea, so it was always just me and Beth.
Beth went out on her own early one morning.’ He stopped again and Lily could see him swallowing hard. ‘I came back immediately, but it was pointless. Losing Beth, I don’t think I’ll ever recover. Then I went off surfing again,’ he added flippantly.
‘I’m so sorry about your sister.’ Lily didn’t know what else to say. She felt so desperately sad on his behalf and it explained why he had been obsessive about safety in the water.
‘Yes. So I came to Bensons in her place, to sort of make it up to my dad. As if. I can’t say it’s been the happiest time of my life. Though,’ he smiled at her, his eyes meeting hers. ‘There have been compensations.’
Lily felt herself blush.
‘What was your wife doing at Bensons that day she put the fear of God into the workforce?’
‘Ex-wife,’ he corrected. ‘She was trying her luck. She’d heard I was back in, what she calls, a proper job. She was between lovers and bored.’
‘Oh. Does she do that often?’
He laughed, a hollow laugh. ‘No. First and last time. I’ve made sure of that. Your turn.’ He lay back in his seat and looked relieved that his story was over.
Lily took a deep breath. Where should she start? Her tale couldn’t match the drama or sadness of his. She told him how she’d met Will at university. Told him how she’d worked her way up in Bensons, how much she used to enjoy her job, until the redundancies started, until…
‘Until I came and spoiled it,’ Jackson added, reading her mind.
‘Not your fault, I see that now.’
‘My father sent me in to troubleshoot, that’s what I’ve done.’ He shrugged. ‘You were telling me about your fiancé.’
Lily wondered if she really wanted to divulge the years of wanting Will and his inability to commit to her. Disclosing her obsession was humiliating. But, she supposed, not as humiliating as his disclosure about his wife’s affairs.
‘Will and I,’ she began, feeling sorry for herself and fighting back tears. How stupid. Stop it. She sniffed and took a deep breath. ‘Will and I had been together…’ her voice trailed away.
‘You don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to. It’s none of my business.’ He stood up.
Was he leaving?
Lily gestured frantically for him to sit back down and waved her hands in front of her face, fanning back the tears. She realised that she did want to tell him. She actually wanted him to know. She just couldn’t get the words out.
He came over and sat next to her, put his arm around her shoulders and pulled her close, then stroked her messy hair away from her face.
‘I’m sorry about your eye,’ she sniffed.
He smiled. ‘These things happen. Don’t worry.’
‘It’s just that I thought you said run, not don’t run.’
He laughed. Kissed her on the forehead.
She wished he wouldn’t do that. She liked it too much.
‘Will and I,’ she began again. ‘Had been together on and off for ten years, although according to Will it’s only about two years really. Anyway, we finished when he decided to go to America on a motorbike holiday with his mates for a month. That’s when I went on holiday to Devon with Tess and Gemma.’
‘I see.’
‘We’re not together any longer.’
‘I know.’
Lily pulled away from him. ‘How do you know?’ Had Damon been spilling the beans?
‘Well, I guessed. That would be more accurate – I guessed. You’re not wearing your engagement ring.’
‘It might have been at the jewellers being resized.’ Lily felt indignant, irrationally annoyed.
‘And you drew my name inside a heart.’ He was smirking.
Lily pulled herself from his embrace and stood up, hands on her hips again.
‘You’re very sure of yourself. You’re being arrogant.’
‘I am. It’s one of my many failings. I’m sorry.’ He looked contrite, Lily thought, although a little smile was playing at the corners of his mouth.
‘Well, that’s it,’ she said.
‘What do you mean?’ The smile vanished.
‘That’s it, my story. Not as exciting or dramatic as yours, but that’s it.’ She realised how dismissive that sounded, she was horrified to belittle his sister’s death. ‘I’m sorry. I didn’t mean…’
‘It’s okay.’ A glimmer of a smile returned to his face.
‘So here we are,’ Lily said, immediately wishing she hadn’t spoken.
‘Yes. Here we are. Fate has brought us together – just as you said it could.’ He stood up and took her hands in his. ‘Are you coming back to Bensons?’
She shrugged. ‘I don’t know. Are you?’
He shook his head. ‘No, well yes. But only to clear up the mess and set things in order for my replacement.’ He pulled her left hand up to his mouth and kissed it.
‘Right.’
‘That could be you.’ He looked into her eyes, his expression earnest. ‘If you want it. I would support your application wholeheartedly.’
‘I’ve been there, done that. I wasn’t very successful the first time.’
‘You were, actually. If it hadn’t been for all the irregularities you would
have got it.’
‘Really? You’re not just saying that.’
‘Truly. You were by far the best candidate. And they had enough applicants; I know, I saw all the CVs.’
‘You’re not just sucking up to me, are you? Trying to make me feel better.’ Lily couldn’t quite believe it. Until now she’d had no feedback from her application or interview.
‘Why would I?’ He kissed her other hand.
‘And where will you be?’
‘I’m going back to Devon. My father and I have both agreed that this isn’t my calling. He thinks I’ve done a great job, but he also sees how unhappy this corporate life makes me.’
‘He sounds very understanding.’
‘He is. And with the money I’ve earned here I’ll be able to buy Davey out of his surf-school. He’s been looking to sell it for ages.’
‘Oh. I see. That sounds great for you.’ Lily pulled her hands from his and stepped away from him. ‘So I have two options, I can go for the job again, or, if I don’t get it, I can take my chances with your replacement and possibly end up out of a job?’.
He stepped towards her, closing the gap she had just created. ‘There is a third option.’ He put his hands on her hair, smoothed it away from her face, used his thumbs to wipe away her panda eyes. ‘Come with me.’
‘To Devon?’
‘Yes.’
‘But…’
‘Come here, mermaid hair,’ he said, taking her face in his hands and kissing her.
She felt her knees buckle. She felt her head swim. She wrapped her arms around him and pulled him closer.
‘You’re cheating,’ she said, when they finally let go of each other. ‘You’re trying to influence my decision.’
‘You bet I am,’ he said and kissed her again.
Later, much later, as Lily sat brushing her hair in front of her dressing table he said, ‘Seriously, I don’t want to force you into a hasty decision. You take your time. I’m not leaving until everything is sorted out at Bensons anyway.’
‘You’ve changed your mind now?’ she laughed.
‘No. No. Of course not. I want you to come with me, more than anything.’
‘Good.’
‘Not that it should influence your decision, but I fell in love with you weeks ago.’
‘Me too,’ Lily said, feeling shy.
‘Yeah, I think it was when I saw your arse hanging out of that skanky wetsuit.’
Lily turned towards him, her eyes narrowing. She attempted to swipe him with the hairbrush but he was too quick and dodged out of the way. She shrieked as she chased him around the bedroom and he laughed when she caught him.
Epilogue
Lily basked in the sun in front of the surf-shack, wriggling her toes in the warm, soft sand. It was late September and few people were to be seen on the beach; the children were back in school and the holidaymakers had gone back to work.
The sea however, fierce and frothy, was full of surfers. She envied them their freedom to ride the waves and feel the spray on their faces.
Her phone pinged as a message arrived from Damon: How you doing? Any news hun? xx
Lily couldn’t help smiling. Her reply was immediate and short: Still waiting, lol xx
Damon: Loving my new PA, so glad Scare-a-von decided to retire, lol xxx
Lily replied with a smiley face, she really didn’t want to get into a conversation about Veronica. If she was totally honest she was no longer interested in the day-to-day activities of Bensons, she had more important things to focus on.
When Jackson had asked her to come with him to Devon she’d never imagined it would take so long to tie up all the loose ends at Bensons, sell her house and move lock, stock and barrel to the coast. They’d now lived in Devon for six glorious months, but it had been a year since they’d made their decision.
At least the delay had given her the opportunity to help with Tess’s wedding, which, just as Tess had predicted, took place a mere three months after Gareth had proposed. They had tied the knot in the local Registry Office, then taken all twenty-two of their guests on a vintage bus tour to a chic and tiny boutique hotel in Somerset. Tess had worn a vintage frock which her mother had had stashed in the attic for just such an occasion. ‘How lucky was that?’ had been Tess’s laughing comment when she’d told Lily about it. The reception had been reminiscent of a children’s party; balloons and trifle, music played on a 70s turntable and guests able to choose the songs themselves from the hotel’s vast collection of vinyl records.
Lily and Jackson had danced the night away and in the morning – before Lily had even got out of bed and was wondering how bad her hangover would be – Jackson had got down on one knee by her side of the bed and asked her to marry him.
‘Don’t get carried away by the romance of this wedding,’ she laughed, thinking he was joking. ‘You really don’t have to do this.’ Shy and embarrassed, she pulled the covers over her head.
‘I don’t have to. I want to.’ He pulled the duvet back and grabbed her left hand, pulled it to his mouth and kissed her fingers. ‘What’s your answer?’
Lily didn’t hesitate, didn’t think about anything other than how much she wanted to be with Jackson. Forever. Afterwards, whenever she thought about his proposal a warm glow enveloped her. How different it had felt to her reaction to Will’s proposal.
‘Yes please,’ she said, looking into his earnest eyes; so blue, so beautiful.
‘Thank you,’ he whispered, slipping the diamond solitaire easily onto her finger.
Lily sat up in bed and stared at the ring. ‘It’s beautiful, but…’
‘You don’t like it?’
‘I love it. Oh, I love it.’ She pulled him in and kissed him hard. ‘But where did it come from?’
He frowned. ‘I brought it with me.’
‘But when did you buy it? I mean…’ What did she mean? She wasn’t sure herself.
Now he laughed and appeared to consider his answer. ‘I actually bought it the day after we went skydiving.’
‘What? For me? After I’d blacked your eye?’
‘Of course for you. Who else? I told you, I fell in love with you on a Devon beach when you were not looking your best.’
She punched him playfully on the arm and pushed him away. ‘You were very sure of yourself, you arrogant…’
She never finished the sentence because he wrapped her in his arms and smothered her with kisses as he whispered, ‘I’ve already admitted it’s one of my many failings.’
Their wedding followed very quickly. Less vintage than Tess’s, it was a winter wedding, held between Christmas and New Year, in a charming little castle near Lily’s parents. Her dad had given her away and her mum had sung Jackson’s praises after he had charmed his way into her heart. Jackson’s parents had flown in by helicopter, landing in the castle grounds.
Tess had been a bridesmaid and, after a lot of hints and lobbying from Gemma, so had Pixie-Bella. Everyone had agreed that she had stolen the show. Gemma had played a pivotal part in the wedding; it was thanks to her that they found such a stunning venue at such short notice. It was Gemma who had located the castle and used her powers of persuasion on the owners to allow it to be used over the Christmas holiday period. It was also Gemma who convinced them that a helicopter landing in their grounds would do no damage to their award winning landscaped grounds, just as it was Gemma who gave the owners a year’s free PR advice as compensation for the damage it did do. Fortunately Gemma was in a position to offer such advice for free, because despite only working part-time and barely being there five minutes, she now ran the entire PR and advertising company.
‘Sure beats having another baby. Who knew work could be such fun?’ She had shared this nugget with Lily and Tess the week before the wedding when they met for a combined Christmas drink and hen party. She also had a trendy new hairstyle, but Lily didn’t have to courage to ask if her own hair had regrown or if it was a wig.
It had snowed just after the ceremo
ny and Lily and Jackson had toasted their marriage with champagne, while watching giant snowflakes fall past leaded light windows. It had been the happiest day of Lily’s life.
So far.
Lily watched Jackson stride up the beach carrying his surfboard. His hair had grown longer again and was already bleached by the sun and the sea. He dropped the board on the sand and unzipped his wetsuit, letting it fall to his waist. Just the sight of him made her heart flip.
‘And how are my girls?’ he asked, bending down to Lily and kissing her.
‘Well, this girl,’ she said, pointing at herself. ‘Is tired and rapidly losing patience. And this girl,’ she patted her very pregnant bump. ‘Is looping the loop and showing no signs of making an appearance.’
Jackson laughed. ‘She’s only two days overdue. Come on.’ He grabbed her hands to pull her up. ‘Let’s get you home.’
‘Oh, and look what I found in the discarded shoe crate.’ Lily pushed her feet into her flip-flops.
Jackson looked down. ‘Cool,’ he said.
‘No. They’re the ones I lost that day I met you. Remember? I had to borrow those disgusting trainers from Davey.’
‘I remember.’ Jackson laughed. ‘He never said he found yours. What else is back there?’
‘Not much. I’ve thrown a lot of rubbish away.’
Jackson peeled off his wetsuit and hung it up.
‘Damon messaged me,’ Lily said as they packed up their belongings and closed up the surf-shack.
‘He should be well settled into the job now. I think we made the right decision there.’
‘So does he.’ Lily laughed. Damon, who always professed to not being at all ambitious, had slid into the role of finance director as smoothly as if he had been born to it. ‘He says he’s loving his new PA.’
‘I bet. I’m glad he managed to let Veronica leave in a pleasant way. Though I’m still not convinced she wasn’t, if not part of the fraud, certainly aware of it.’
‘We’ll never know. Anyway, Damon thinks that she left because of him.’