“Hi, Elijah,” Michaela responded. “What are you up to?”
“Trying to keep busy,” he admitted.
“Well, I just heard from Jason.”
“And?” he demanded.
“He’s taking Maggie to Boston, but he said they won’t be gone long.”
He blew out through his teeth. “Shit.” He knew what Boston meant for Maggie. She’d need him.
“Jason said it was something they needed to do, just the two of them.” It was like Michaela was reading his mind.
“Fine.” At least he knew where she was. He’d call his mom in the morning to see if she thought he should come.
“Come to the bar.” Michaela was an expert at changing the subject. “Chris and I are about to head over.”
“You know what?” Elijah said. “I think I will.”
Michaela let out an excited squeal. “See you soon.”
They hung up, and Elijah turned his car around. Traffic was light, so it didn’t take him long to get there.
He parked a few blocks away and then walked into the bar. It was a popular place. Aaron, Jason’s manager, saw him coming towards the bar and had a beer ready for him. He took it and then found Michaela and Chris sitting at a table in the corner.
Brother and sister both smiled at him as he took a seat. They were easy people to be around, and Elijah appreciated the lack of tension.
“‘Bout time you got here, lover boy,” Chris chirped. “Figured you’d be all broody since the love of your life, your reason for living, is out of town.”
Elijah leveled him with a stare, but it didn’t bother Chris. Michaela was laughing beside him and Elijah couldn’t help the slight upturn of his lips. They had obviously already had a few drinks.
Both of them had backed off drinking a lot lately, but they still liked to have a good time. They were a bit younger than Elijah, especially Michaela, but he couldn’t remember being as carefree and fun at that age.
Michaela pushed her long auburn curls over her shoulder and looked at the two boys. “Okay,” she started, “We haven’t told anyone with all the stuff that’s been going on with Maggie, but I’m assuming Jason is telling her while they’re in Boston.”
“Michaela, slow down,” Chris said, putting a hand on his sister’s shoulder. “What haven’t you told anyone?”
“Um... JasonandIareengaged.” It came out as one word and took a moment to register in Elijah’s ears.
A grin brightened his face as Chris yelped in excitement and threw his arms around Michaela.
“When?” Chris asked, once he had stopped cheering. “How?”
Michaela sipped her drink and looked over the rim of the glass. She put it down, deliberately drawing out her actions to annoy her brother. Elijah was more patient.
“Michaela,” Chris huffed.
She laughed lightly before starting the story. “Well, he didn’t really mean to propose yet. He said he was going to wait until we were in Connecticut so he could do it at the beach. It was the day he read Maggie’s letter, but hours before. We were in bed,” the color rose in her cheeks.
Chris waggled his eyebrows, and Elijah’s smile widened.
“We weren’t doing that!” she exclaimed when she saw their expressions. “We’d just woken up and were wrestling, you know, just playing around. I pinned him to the bed with my knee to his chest and leaned down to kiss him. He was laughing as he flipped me. Then he just kind of blurted out, ‘marry me’.”
She looked down, a smile twitching on her lips.
“He tried to take it back. It was so cute. He started blushing furiously, so embarrassed that he said it. He said he wanted it to be so perfect, but I told him it was. It was spontaneous and genuine. I didn’t let him take it back.”
“Well,” Chris said, clapping Michaela on the back. “This calls for champagne!” He left to go get it, and Elijah looked back at Michaela.
“Congrats,” he said. “You guys are perfect.”
“I know,” she said quietly.
Elijah envied them, about to stand up in front of everyone they knew to proclaim how much they loved each other. Even if they never had that, he’d take Maggie however he could have her.
He glanced at his phone, hoping for a message from her. Nothing. Worry gnawed at his stomach.
Chris returned a minute later, holding a bottle of champagne and three glasses. “Time to celebrate!”
Elijah ran a hand over his forehead in anticipation of the headache he’d have in the morning if he tried to keep up with these two.
“Screw it,” he said, taking his glass. He’d celebrate with Michaela now, and deal with the repercussions later.
Waking up in a place from your past that’s so very familiar to you is strange. Mama Lugo hadn’t changed her fabric softener since Maggie was a kid, and the floral scent clung to the sheets as she lay in bed. A bed that she’d spent many nights in. That was another lifetime.
The dresser that once held Maggie’s worn assortment of Goodwill clothes had been refinished. Mr. Lugo was always doing little projects like that around the house.
Maggie threw back the sheets and set her bare feet on the cold, wooden floor. She stood in front of the window that looked down into the backyard. It was just as she remembered it. A tall wooden fence ran along the perimeter of the small space, keeping in the dog they once had. A small deck jutted out from the back of the house, its base lined by beautiful gardens. These, Maggie remembered, were Mama’s pets. It’s where Maggie had developed a love for gardening. She’d even designed the gardens at Elijah’s new house.
Thoughts of Elijah filled her with a desire to be down in that yard. A yard they’d spent so much time in as kids, talking and sometimes just sitting in silence. Whatever she needed.
She was still in her pajamas, and she didn’t want to take the time to shower and dress just yet. Stepping out into the hall, she went next door and knocked on the door. Jason answered, already showered and ready for the day.
“You just getting up?” he asked, surprised.
“Yes.” She pushed past him into the room and went straight to the dresser, knowing some of Elijah’s old things were still in there. She opened the drawer and found what she was looking for. A pair of drawstring basketball shorts.
Jason arched an eyebrow, but let her leave. She changed into the shorts and a tank top, throwing her hair into a ponytail. Not bothering with shoes, she went down the stairs and straight out the back door.
The scents of summer hit her full force. The flowers were in full bloom, and their smells drifted on the soft breeze. She shielded her eyes from the sun, its rays breaking through the thick rain clouds as she stood on the deck taking in her surroundings. It was going to be a hot, wet one, she could feel that already, as a line of sweat started to form in beads along her upper lip.
She didn’t bother with the steps as she hopped to the ground from the deck. In the fall, she and Elijah used to jump from the deck into piles of leaves. There were no leaves on the ground yet.
Her steps were slow and deliberate as she walked the familiar path across the small yard. The willow tree, their tree, stood taller than she remembered. It took up an entire corner of the yard, shielding everything beneath its drooping branches from the harsher realities of summer. It was missing something though. Their bench. The bench where she’d first kissed Elijah. Where he’d made the only promise to her he’d ever broken.
Can you promise you’re only going to kiss me once? Because, Elijah, you are my best friend and if I lose you, I’ll have nothing.
She closed her eyes as the memory grew stronger. Even then, she knew it would change everything. She hugged her arms in front of her, wishing he was there with her. She needed him. There had never been a time in her life where she had to face something big without him by her side. He was her strength, and without him she didn’t know what she had left.
The weight of that realization forced itself on her, and her shoulders sagged. She walked forward and sunk
to the ground with her back against the trunk of the tree.
“Why am I here?” she asked no one, looking up towards the sky. The truth was, she didn’t know. There was the closure factor, saying goodbye to her father. But she also wanted to prove that he was wrong. She would’ve come if he told her he was sick. This was her showing up for him when he never did the same for her. Proof she was different.
She had also needed to get out of New York to think. But being here just made that harder.
“You’ll hurt yourself if you think that hard,” Mama Lugo said, walking across the lawn towards her, two cups of coffee in hand.
To Maggie’s surprise, Mama didn’t wait for her to get up. Instead, she sat next to her in the dirt.
“You two and this tree.” She laughed, holding out one of the mugs towards Maggie. “I assume you still take it the same way.”
“Yes, thank you.” She took the coffee gratefully and sipped it. “Mama, can I ask you a question?”
“Of course.”
“Why didn’t you tell me my dad was sick? Or sober, for that matter?”
She let out a long sigh. “To be honest, I didn’t believe he’d stay sober. He’d tried before. I didn’t want to pull you back in to his mess, only to have you get hurt again.”
“But then he was dying.”
“Something I didn’t know about until the very end. And at that point, it was a dying man’s wish. I didn’t trust your father to go without causing more trouble.” She stopped and looked away. “I was wrong, though. You deserved to know. I’m sorry for that.”
Maggie wrapped a reassuring arm around Mama’s shoulders, and neither spoke for a few long moments.
“I talked to Elijah this morning,” Mama said.
Maggie made a sound in the back of her throat, but didn’t speak.
“He’s worried about you,” she continued. “Jason’s fiancée told him you were here. He was about to jump in his car and come, but I convinced him to let you come to him.”
“Thank you,” Maggie whispered and then looked up suddenly. “Did you say Jason’s fiancée?”
“Yes, he mentioned her this morning.”
Maggie jumped to her feet and wiped the dirt from her shorts. She held a hand down to help Mama up, and then both headed in to the house.
Jason was sitting at the kitchen table, an omelet in front of him.
“You were right,” he said when she walked in, grinning through a mouthful of egg. “She is an amazing cook.”
“You and Michaela are engaged, and you failed to tell me?” she asked.
He dropped his fork to his plate and swallowed the mouthful of food before nodding slowly and then wincing in anticipation of whatever she was going to yell at him.
But she didn’t want to yell. She sat next to him and looked him in the eye before speaking softly. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
“It was just that...” He paused, at a loss.
“Because of what I said to you before?” she finished for him. “About marriage being a mistake?”
“Kind of.” He shrugged. “I proposed right before I read the letter. Then we didn’t speak for a while and, by the time we did, I didn’t want to add anything more to your plate right now. Your head’s so full of other stuff.”
“Jason, it’s never too full for you.” She took his hand. “I’m happy for you. You know I love Michaela. I just wish you felt like you could tell me.”
“I’m sorry.”
“No, I am.” She reached forward and pulled him into a hug. “I love you, Cuzzy.”
“Love you too, Mags.”
An afternoon rain had started by the time Maggie got up the courage to do what she came to Boston to do. This was about closure.
She huddled closer to Jason under the umbrella, gravel shifting below her feet, as they continued down the path from the car. The place was quiet except for the sound of raindrops hitting stone and their boots crunching along.
They passed row after row of gravestones marking a family’s sadness before arriving at the right one. Mama Lugo had given them directions, but let them do this on their own. Maggie was just glad she had Jason to lend her strength. Not for the first time, she wished Elijah was here with her. He’d been there for everything else having to do with her father. It would’ve been fitting for him to be there when it all came to an end.
She needed him so fiercely that it hurt. But Jason was there, and she had to do it while she had the will.
Scanning the names carved into the simple flat stones, Maggie came to a stop. There it was.
Frank Henry Marks.
Jason’s arm tightened around her, but she barely took notice. Despite being next to her cousin, one of the people she loved most in this world, she felt alone in that moment. She stepped away from Jason, closer to the gravestone, barely registering the rain that was now soaking through her shirt. She held a hand up to ask Jason for a moment. He offered her the umbrella, but she just shook her head, her quickly dampening locks swinging from side to side.
Turning back to the grave, she finally spoke. “Coward.” The word came out choked, so she straightened her shoulders and cleared her throat. “Yeah, I’m talking about you, Dad. You were a coward. I deserved to know. I deserved the chance to say goodbye. See, Dad, you were wrong. I came for you. Didn’t you know anything about me? Didn’t you know that I would’ve been there?” Her shoulders shook as she held in a sob. “You didn’t. Because you didn’t care.”
She stopped speaking and looked towards the sky, letting the rain wash over her face. After a few long moments, she brought her gaze back to the stone. “Bastard,” she whispered. Her legs grew weak beneath her and, before she knew it, she found herself kneeling, her knees sinking into the soaking sod. “I hate you. You know that? I really hate you.”
She dug her fingers into the ground at her sides, pulling up grass and mud alike. Her shoulders hunched forward and she let out a strangled cry. “I love you. You were a filthy drunk and a horrible father and I love you. If you’d let me come, you wouldn’t have been so alone. That’s why I came. I needed to tell you that I’m not like you. I show up for the ones I love.” She gestured around as if he could see her making her point.
“And Dad, I’m not alone.” She leaned forward as if to share a secret with him. “I never have been. Even when I lived in your wretched house, I was loved.”
As if suddenly realizing it was raining, she shivered and started to cry. “I’m not coming again,” she said. “This is it for us, Dad. Thank you for the letter.” It wasn’t until that moment that she realized what his letter had done for her. It brought her here. It brought her to a finale. It gave her a small glimpse into the father she could’ve had. Suddenly, it felt okay to love him. Okay to grieve.
And that’s what she did. She knelt there in the pouring rain, crying for a father she didn’t have to hate. A father she never knew, but a father who had never treated her poorly. Who’d never thrown beer bottles at her or saddled her with an abusive stepmother. A man she’d never had to blackmail or run from. A man who didn’t scare her. No, she could cry for the father who existed only in that letter. The one who gave her advice and told her he loved her.
Strong arms wrapped around her and she let herself cry onto a shoulder she knew all too well.
“What are you doing here?” Jason asked, walking up behind them, his tone not altogether friendly.
“Mama Lugo told me she was here,” Jake responded.
Maggie disengaged from his arms at the sound of his voice.
“Jake,” she whispered.
“I’m here, Mags,” he said, looking over her shoulder at Jason. “Let’s get you in out of the rain.”
She nodded, and he helped her to her feet. Jason was quick to step in and pull her under the umbrella with him.
“I’ll meet you guys back at the Lugo’s,” Jake said when they reached the cars.
Maggie didn’t speak the entire drive back. It was done. She’d come for him. But she wo
uldn’t feel better until she was back in New York. Back with Elijah. The more she was away from him, the less she felt like herself.
Mama was on her as soon as they walked in the door. “You’re soaked!”
“It’s raining.” Maggie tried to shrug off the concern. She just hoped her eyes weren’t puffy from crying.
“Get yourself upstairs and into some dry clothes,” Mama ordered. “I’ll make some tea.” She turned as the front door swung open again. “Jake!”
“Hi, Mama.” Jake gave her a kiss on the cheek, but she declined his wet hug.
“Elijah has some old clothes upstairs. Go get dry.”
“Yes, Ma’am.” He saluted with a grin and followed Maggie upstairs.
After she’d changed, Maggie passed the door to Elijah’s room and heard Jake still inside. Looking towards the stairs and then back to the door, she decided to knock.
Jake answered as he pulled a shirt down over his torso. With one of his patented Jake grins, he gestured for her to come in.
“Why are you here, Jake?” she asked as she took in the familiar room.
“I was at a church event with Mama Lugo when you called last night, so I knew you were coming.”
“Church? You?” She raised an eyebrow, and he laughed softly.
“I’ve changed.”
“Obviously, but why did you come today?”
“When Mama told me where you’d gone, I thought you’d need someone there.” He looked away. “Was I wrong?”
“No,” she said honestly, surprising herself. It was true. Jake was the only person beside Elijah who got it. He was there, by her side, her entire childhood with that man. She wanted to say thank you, but the words wouldn’t cross her lips. The look he gave her told her she didn’t need to speak them.
A picture on the dresser caught her eye, and she walked towards it.
It was of the three of them - Maggie, Elijah, and Jake - in Elijah’s backyard, under the willow tree. They were teenagers. She was in between them, with an arm flung over each of their shoulders. Wide smiles brightened all three faces.
“Seems like another lifetime, doesn’t it?”
Promises_A friends to lovers romance. Page 14