“Make no mistake about what I’m saying,” Alex said. “I’m not a little in love with you, Renee. This is real, full blown stuff I’m feeling. It’s stronger than I thought possible, especially for someone I’ve known for such a short amount of time. But I can’t deny it.”
She wasn’t sure she would be able to speak when she opened her mouth, but Renee didn’t have the words to say, anyway. She was afraid to admit she felt the same way, yet she knew in her heart that her feelings for Alex ran just as deep.
Could she allow herself to be so vulnerable?
“Renee, I didn’t say the words so you would feel obligated to say them in return,” Alex said. “It’s okay if it takes you a little longer to fall in love with me.” He put his knuckle under her chin and lifted her face so he could stare into her eyes. “But know that making you fall in love with me is exactly what I intend to do.”
“Alex, I—”
“No, don’t worry about it,” he said. “Let’s just enjoy the rest of our day together.”
“I want you to know I don’t take what you’ve told me lightly, Alex. Thank you for being so honest.”
“I’ll always be honest with you.” He kissed her softly on the lips. “Thank you for coming here, Renee.”
A smile broke across her lips. “Thank you for inviting me, Alex.”
Renee clutched Alex’s hand and swung it back and forth between them. They both held their shoes in their other hand. The wet sand felt good between her toes. Even with all the years she’d lived in Florida, she never took the time to enjoy the beach.
“This island is gorgeous,” she said. “It’s the perfect place for a wedding.”
“It is,” Alex agreed. “I’m still surprised Eli didn’t go for the big wedding with all the family.” He paused, and then chuckled, shaking his head.
“What?” Renee asked.
“Nothing.”
“Come on, Alex. What’s so funny?”
He shrugged. “I had a big wedding,” he said. “Can’t really blame E for not wanting to follow in my footsteps, huh?”
Pain tugged at her heart for him, but it was quickly replaced by… was that relief? Renee was ashamed to admit it, even to herself, but she would be lying if she could not confess that a small part of her wasn’t appreciative that Chantal had been such a bad wife. Renee was certain it had helped to mold Alex into the man he was today.
“That woman did not deserve you, Alex.”
“No, she didn’t,” he said. He bent to pick up a shell, rubbed sand from it, and sent it skipping along the water. “I made every excuse for her,” he continued. “I even convinced myself that she had a right to mess around on me because I didn’t pay enough attention to her. But that’s bull,” Alex said. “I gave Chantal everything she could ever want. I’m still paying off the debt she left me in with all her designer clothes and shoes, and that damn Benz she cracked up against that tree. And how did she pay me back?”
Renee squeezed his hand tighter.
“At least she gave me Jazzy,” he said. “She put me through so much, Renee, but I’d go through it all again for my little girl. She’s the reason I breathe.”
If there was any such thing as the perfect man, Alex was the closest Renee had ever encountered. His capacity for love held no bounds when it came to his family, especially his daughter. Renee had never known love like this existed.
The thought gave her pause. Was she really ready for Alex to love her? How could she be sure the kind of love he felt for Jasmine would be the same for her? Love had a way of turning brutal; she’d witnessed that enough times to write a book on it.
Don’t be stupid, Renee told herself. She could not picture Alex turning violent. He didn’t have it in him to raise his hand to a woman.
“Your parents did an excellent job raising you,” Renee said. “You do realize how lucky you are, don’t you?” She stopped walking and turned to face him. “You’ve gone through some awful times, Alex, but you’ve been blessed, too.”
“I know,” he said. He brought his hand up to her hair and pushed a few flyaway strands behind her ear. “I was blessed again when I found you.”
She felt the same way. After everything she’d been through as a child and the deadbeats she’d dated as an adult, finding Alex had been a blessing. She trusted him unlike any man that had come before him. She wanted to open up to him. He’d bared his soul about his wife’s duplicity, and how much Chantal had hurt him. Renee didn’t want there to be any doubt that she was willing to reciprocate that trust.
“Alex?” Renee hesitated for a moment. “I need to tell you something.”
Alex stopped their forward progress in the sand. The look in his eyes said he sensed whatever she was about to say would not be good.
“I’ve told you about my childhood,” she started. “And how my father was abusive to both me and my mother. And then how my mother chose to stay with him when I decided to leave.”
“Yes,” he said, kissing her fingers again.
She kicked at a rock in the sand, then looked up at him. “The abuse was a lot worse than I made it out to be.”
“Any amount of abuse is more than you should have to endure.”
Renee’s throat closed up, but she swallowed the lump of emotion and surged forward. “This wasn’t just a few slaps across the face, Alex. My dad tortured me and my mom.
“One day, back when I was a senior in high school, my father came home drunk.” She laughed to herself. “Actually, he came home drunk nearly every day from the time I was twelve, but that day, he seemed different, more hostile than usual. He started in on my mom first, threw her head against the wall, kicked her a few times. Then he looked over at me.”
Renee shuddered.
“There was just so much evil in him,” she said. The image of her father’s face sent tremors down her spine despite the years that had passed since she’d last seen it. “I locked myself in my room, but I knew that would only stall him for a few minutes,” she said. She focused on a sailboat bobbing in the distance, the gentle waves swaying the vessel to and fro. “He burst through the lock on my door and came after me. I tried to fight him off, but he was so much stronger than I was, even drunk.” Her hand went up to her face. “He broke my jaw, my wrist, and cracked two ribs before he was done.”
“God.” Alex captured her by the back of her neck and pulled her close. He breathed into her hair, and whispered, “Please tell me he served time for what he did to you.”
Renee shook her head. “I’m still not sure how he explained his way out of it, but I’m sure my mom corroborated whatever story he told the police. She was so afraid of him, Alex. She tried to leave a few times over the years, but she was convinced he would find her.
“Not too long after the day he put me in the hospital, he was hurt in a car accident, and ended up paralyzed from the chest down. It was as if a door had been opened.” She took a deep breath. “But my mom just wouldn’t walk through it. After everything he’d put her through, she wouldn’t leave him. I hated to leave her there, but I couldn’t take it anymore, Alex. I don’t think I’ve ever cried as much as I did the day I walked out of that house for the last time.”
“Your mother made her own choice,” Alex said. “Never regret what you did that day.”
“I left her with that man,” she said.
“And I’ll bet that’s something you deal with every day, isn’t it?”
She swallowed. “The same way you blame yourself for Chantal’s infidelity,” she volleyed.
Alex accepted that with a nod of his head. “We both have some things to work through, don’t we?”
“Do you think we can get past it?”
“I hope so,” he replied.
The compulsion to bare it all overcame her. Renee fought the feeling to stifle the words, admitting in an awed voice, “Alex, I think I’m falling in love with you.”
Renee immediately wanted to take the words back. Even if what she was feeling was love, she was
n’t sure she wanted Alex to know the depth of her emotions for him just yet.
“I love you, too, Renee. So much so that it scares me,” he said. “When I’m not around you, you’re all I can think about. Even if you’re right in the next room. I want to be with you every second of every day. And you love my little girl. Sometimes, I question whether her own mother loved her, yet you treat her as if she were your own.”
“I do love her,” Renee said, choking back a sob. “Alex, how did I let this happen?”
“What?”
“Falling in love with the both of you?”
“It’s not a bad thing, Renee.”
“I know,” she said. But a part of her believed it was a very bad thing. Love was a horrifying emotion. Love made you do things no sane person would ever do, like remain in a marriage that could hurt you. She’d vowed to never find herself in the same situation her mother was in. She could not love to the point of losing herself.
“We don’t have to act on it any time soon,” Alex said. “I’m enjoying what we have here. We still have a few days in St. Martin, and even when we’re back in New Orleans, there’s no rule that states we have to make drastic changes. We can take things slow.” He captured her chin in his hand and lifted her head until she was looking at him again. “I would love nothing more than to spend time getting to know you better. Both in and out of bed,” he said.
Renee smiled despite the stupid tears that continued to well in her eyes. “I would really like that, too, Alex.”
“Good.” He placed one of his soft kisses on her lips. “Let’s see what kind of seashells we can find.”
“Grandma, is this one pretty?” Jasmine held up a beautiful mother of pearl brooch, though it must have been a fake in order for the shop keeper to have it just lying around where customers could touch it.
“What do you think?” Margo asked.
“I don’t know if it’s pretty or not,” Jasmine answered. “That’s why I asked you.”
“Beauty is a matter of opinion, sweetheart. What’s beautiful to one person may not be beautiful to another.”
Her cell phone vibrated in her pocket. Margo fished out the tiny phone and looked at the screen. A flutter of excitement flitted through her as she recognized the number.
“Enjoying the tropics?” Gerald’s deep voice came through the line.
“I am,” Margo answered. “But I’ve missed you.”
“I know exactly what you mean.”
“How are things back home?” she asked.
“Oh, I suppose everything is okay.”
“That case must have you pretty busy.”
“Grandma,” Jasmine said. She tugged her toward the back wall that held what must have numbered a hundred doll dresses. “I love these,” she said.
“They’re wonderful, honey,” Margo answered. “I took Jasmine shopping this morning. We’re just taking a stroll through some of the local shops,” she explained to Gerald. “It’s hard not to buy everything in the store, but I’ve been doing a good job holding back.”
“You sure about that? Your granddaughter seems to like that pink doll dress she’s holding.”
“Yeah, but she’s not—” Margo’s heart stopped when she realized what he’d said. Her eyes darted around the store. She heard Gerald’s deep laughter coming through the phone.
“Look to your right,” he said. She swung her head around, and there he was, his shoulder propped against a white wooden column just outside the shop’s entryway, his sleek cell phone to his ear.
“Gerald,” Margo whispered breathlessly into the phone. “What are you doing here?”
She saw him shrug one shoulder. “I had some vacation time.”
“No, you didn’t. You had an important case.”
“Which I left in the care of my very capable partner.”
Margo brought her hand up to the bridge of her nose and started to knead. She was torn between wanting to throw the phone at his stubborn head and wanting to run outside and throw her arms around him.
“Are you saying you’re not happy to see me?” he asked.
Jasmine tugged on the hem of her shirt. “Grandma, can I please get one doll? I promise not to ask for anything ever again.”
“Jasmine, go and pick out a doll,” Margo told her, knowing Alex would kill her. They all had strict orders not to buy Jasmine gifts unless she did something to earn them, but she had to get her granddaughter out of her hair for a minute so she could murder Gerald Mitchell.
“Stay where I can see you,” Margo called to Jasmine as her granddaughter dashed to the doll display.
Gerald was already walking her way. He was so tall he had to dip under the shop’s arched stone entryway.
Margo waited for him, her arms crossed over her chest.
“Why are you giving me that face?” Gerald asked. He bent down and kissed her cheek.
“Because you are not supposed to be here,” Margo answered.
“I told you I couldn’t stay away.”
“Gerald.” She shook her head. “Do you honestly think we’ll get to spend any time together?”
“Where there is a will there is a way, my darling. You’ve become pretty savvy at avoiding those sons of yours,” he said.
She had, and she wasn’t particularly proud of it. In fact, she was downright tired of it. Alex had surprised everyone by bringing Renee here for the wedding; why couldn’t she do the same with Gerald?
A weight seemed to lift from her shoulders at just the thought of all the subterfuge finally coming to an end. She could enjoy Gerald out in the open, without the fear of being caught.
“Honey?”
“Where are you staying?” she asked him.
“La Samanna on Baie Longue. It’s on the St. Marteen side of the island. It was the closest place available. Damn tax lawyers have a convention in St. Martin.” He smiled.
Margo had to laugh. His own practice was filled with tax lawyers. “I’m going to call you this afternoon. Do you have plans?”
“Nothing that won’t change as soon as you say the word. I’m just going to hang around the hotel pool with my laptop until you call.”
“I still cannot believe you came all the way here,” she said.
“I’m not sure why you’re so surprised, Margo. Even if I couldn’t see you, I just feel better knowing you’re close.”
Her heart constricted in her chest. Good Lord, this man knew how to make her feel special with his sweet words.
“I’m going to see you to night,” she promised.
“I’ll be waiting for you,” he said. He gave her a swift kiss and was out the store.
“Grandma, the lady behind the counter said you have to pay for it before I can hold my new doll.”
“That’s how things work.” Margo took Jasmine by the hand and they headed for the counter.
“Grandma? Why did that man kiss you?”
Chapter Nineteen
Alex heard the crush of voices as soon as he stepped through the glass doors that led into the villa’s common area. Hearing a familiar voice call out “Isn’t there something to eat up in here?” confirmed that Toby had arrived.
“Yeah, where’s the food?”
Monica’s best friend and sister in law, Nia, had arrived as well.
Alex guided Renee into the living room. Toby, his fiancée, Sienna, Eli, and Monica were standing in the entryway, along with Nia, and Monica’s siblings, Phillip and Ashley.
“Hello, everybody,” Alex called.
“Yo, Alex. What’s up?” Toby pointed at him with the phone he was using to text. As soon as he was done, he pocketed his BlackBerry and started toward Alex. “What’s been going on, man?” Toby asked, patting Alex on the back. “You taking care of that shoulder?”
“It’s nearly healed up,” he answered. Alex could tell the exact moment Toby spotted Renee.
“Hi there,” Toby said. “You must be a friend of Monica’s.”
There was a pause.
“Act
ually—” Monica said.
“This is Renee,” Alex said, motioning for her to take the few steps that would bring her smack in the middle of the foyer. He would apologize later for putting her on display like the newest exhibit at a museum.
“Hi,” Renee waved.
Alex gestured to Toby. “Renee, this is my youngest brother, Toby, and his fiancée, Cee Cee. I mean Sienna.”
“From you, I’ll allow Cee Cee,” Sienna said, giving him a hug. “Great to meet you, Renee.”
Alex continued with the introductions to Nia and Phillip, and Monica introduced everyone to her seventeen year old sister, Ashley, who’d flown in from some fancy school for the arts in New York.
“Somebody point me to the bathroom,” Phillip said. “Then I’m falling onto the first bed I see.”
“He’s been up for thirty six hours straight,” Nia explained, shaking her head as her husband retreated down the hallway Monica had directed him.
Alex thought he and Renee could make a clean exit following Phillip’s departure, but Toby asked, “So, Renee, you came down from St. Louis?”
“I didn’t bring Renee here, Toby,” Monica offered, a sneaky smile on her lips.
“I’m here with Alex,” Renee said.
“Bullshit,” Toby laughed.
“Toby,” Alex said in a warning tone.
“Hold up, she’s serious?” Toby asked, looking to Eli for confirmation. Eli nodded, grinning.
“Somebody better check the temperature in hell,” Toby laughed.
“Why do you always have to be a jackass?” Alex asked.
“That’s just how he is,” Sienna said.
“Way to stick up for me, baby.” Toby grabbed his fiancée by the arm and brought her in for a quick kiss.
One by one, the women filed out of the foyer toward the kitchen.
Pointing in the direction the ladies had just strolled, Toby’s expression was a mixture of confusion and satisfaction. “Is this the woman who Eli said you had in your house?” he asked.
Alex nodded. “I’ve been seeing Renee for a while. Why don’t we leave it at that?”
“After all this time playing the monk routine, you finally get around to seeing somebody and I’m sitting here in the dark? Cough it up, man. I want a blow by blow of how this all went down.” Toby cut accusing eyes at Eli. “You were holding out me.”
Rescue Me Page 26