by Wendy Vella
Emily blushed. “He was just being friendly.”
“Oh no, dear, it was more than friendship I saw in his eyes.”
“I don’t think I like the idea of a man looking at my sister in such a way,” James said, winking at Emily.
She in turn reacted predictably and went into herself, as she always did when he addressed her. It was damned annoying, Cam thought—now that he could think, that was.
“Jackson is a fair enough man, but I don’t believe he is a man I want showing interest in my sister.”
“Who is standing right here,” Emily said, surprising Cam with her forthright words.
“I will marry Emily one day, so now that is settled could we go inside.”
Warwick’s words made everyone laugh, and Emily hurried over to hug the boy. He allowed it because she was one of his people, and he also understood that she was vulnerable in many ways. Warwick had always been aware of such things.
“I have tickets. Children must remain attached to an adult—”
“Must we have this lecture every time, Dev?”
“Yes, Somer, because if you will remember, last time we went to something like this you pulled that lever and stopped the entire platform from rotating, thus causing that woman to topple onto me. A rather large woman.”
The little girl offered her big brother a contrite smile.
“Please continue, Dev.”
When the lecture was finished they began to file inside Mr. Roland’s Circus of Strange and Ridiculous Curiosities. This was an annual event for the family, because the first time they had attended the twins had been abducted right there in the street. What followed had been terrifying for all concerned. To eradicate that image, they had come back every year since.
It was softly lit inside, the stage illuminated from beneath. It had not changed, even slightly, since they had first attended several years ago.
“Oh, you’re back?”
Mr. Roland, the proprietor of the show, saw them coming and his smiled dimmed. He still wore a battered top hat and bright red jacket. His mustache was waxed to curl up on the ends and covered the upper half of his mouth.
He had yet to forgive them for the lever-pulling incident, or the incessant questioning from the children. James had thrown some money at him, and only this had stopped them from being barred. There was also the small matter of a fire that they had had nothing to do with, but he blamed them for. This had also cost them money for repairs.
“No bowing and currying favor today then, Duke,” Dev drawled as they moved to take their places. “You’ve lost your power.”
“I’ll always be several rungs higher on the ladder than you, Sinclair.”
The teasing continued as they took up their positions. Children in the front, adults at the rear, close at hand if need be, and then the lights were lowered.
“Excuse me, Cam, I am unable to see clearly,” Essie said. “And you are standing between me and my husband.”
“You saw him two minutes ago!”
“I may get scared and require him.”
An elbow was applied to Cam’s ribs. Winded, he did as he was asked, and found himself beside Emily.
Bloody, bothering hell.
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Emily kept her eyes on the stage as the music started. Today’s show was to be a production on the mythical centaur, half man, half horse. She had been lectured about the creature by Samantha this morning.
“So, Mr. Jackson thinks you’re beautiful?”
The whispered words came from Cam as the first centaur rose onto the stage.
“Sssh.”
“And do you think he’s handsome?”
“I’m not sure I would ever think a half man half horse handsome, but there is a certain something about his look. Samantha told me that there are many myths surrounding centaurs. That they, the offspring of King Ixion, mated with the cloud nymph, Nephele, whom a jealous Zeus created in the likeness of Hera.”
Cam snorted softly. “You have been spending too much time with people under the age of twelve. It’s my belief that this particular centaur is named Joseph from Peckham, and he has a wife and four children.”
“Surely not?”
“You did not answer the question, Emily. Do you find Mr. Jackson handsome?”
“That is none of your business.”
His breath brushed her cheek, and she fought the responding shiver.
“I am curious, nothing more. The man did not strike me as someone worthy of your interest.”
“How can you know that when you barely conversed with him?”
“Emily.” Dorrie turned to shush her. “Please temper your excitement, we shall miss something otherwise.”
“Forgive me, Dorrie.” She sent a glare at Cam through the dark, to find his face very close to hers.
“I know men, and I have met him a few times at Max’s warehouse. He seems untrustworthy.”
“You cannot know that either,” she whispered furiously.
“You are not used to male adoration, therefore I feel I must caution you—”
“That is not your place to do so.” Emily cut him off.
“I disagree. I know men, and you don’t.”
“Shut up,” Emily hissed. “I have no wish to discuss this further.”
“You say that a lot to me.”
Pressing her lips together, Emily vowed not to speak with him again.
“One question?”
She stilled at his words.
“Yes.”
“Your turn.”
“Why do you hide behind humor? Why are you rarely serious?” Emily looked at Cam, wondering if he would answer something so personal.
He was silent, his eyes on the stage where a kaleidoscope of images was rotating, and yet she doubted he saw anything as he thought about her words.
“Because they deserved more from me when they needed me most, and I did not deliver, so I am redeeming myself now.”
“I don’t understand, what could you possibly have done?”
“That’s two questions.”
Frustrated, she stood in silence contemplating what she had learned. There had been a time in Cam’s life when he had not been a good person, and his family had suffered because of his actions? The thought shocked her.
“What is your deepest fear?”
The words made her shiver. He’d asked the very question she had.
“I-I do not know how to answer that,” she said truthfully.
“Only you know what is inside your mind, Emily. Think, and you will find the answer.”
She stood there in the darkness as her mind whirled. No one had asked her such a thing before, and she rarely considered the matter herself.
“That all this will one day be gone and I will return to the life I once lived.”
She felt his hand in the middle of her back, and the warm presence chased away the cold that Emily had felt saying those words. The dark memories of a past she’d been forced to live.
“You know deep inside that will never happen, Em. Allow yourself to live today, as you will every day. Allow yourself to embrace it, and the darkness will fade. Let them, your family, see the real you.”
Could she?
“I know my family deserve more of me, Cam, your words have shown me that.” Emily decided on honesty.
“James certainly does.”
Emily searched for her brother. He stood with Eden leaning on him, and Samantha before him. One large hand was on her shoulder. She knew he was a good man; could she forgive herself for something she played no part in, and treat him as she did Max?
“Will you at least try?”
She managed a nod around the lump in her throat, but said nothing more. They stood there, she and Cam, his hand on her back, and watched the performance, and she’d never felt more aware of a person in her life before than she did the large disturbing man to her right.
She was aware of the breath he drew, the small movement of his body, and
it had to stop. He was Cam, her nemesis, the man she’d often wished to maim. Emily believed it now, believed that since he’d saved her that day everything had changed between them. She’d fought it, but could no longer deny the truth. Something stirred inside her when Cambridge Sinclair was near, and it must stop. There was no future in feeling this way.
“What?”
“What?”
“You made a noise,” Cam said.
“Clearing my throat.”
“Only you would clear your throat with a soft moan.”
“I beg your pardon, but I did not just moan... in public!”
“Emily.” Dorrie faced her again. “You are my friend, and my older siblings tell me I am not allowed to be rude to friends.”
“Forgive me, Dorrie, for raising my voice. I promise to refrain from further discussion.”
The little girl studied her, then her eyes went to Cam, whom Emily could feel shaking with laughter.
“I’m sure some of the blame could be laid at Cam’s door, as he could provoke a nun who has taken a vow of silence, to speak.”
The only suitable response to that, to Emily’s mind, was a solemn nod, which seemed to appease the girl as she turned away once more.
“I pity the poor men who end up with my twin sisters.”
She heard the pride in Cam’s voice, and found a smile, but this time refrained from saying anything. He did not remove his hand until the show ended, and fool that she was, Emily missed it.
“And now we have a surprise for you all.” James said the words as they reached the carriages, and suddenly all eyes were on him.
“I want mint!”
“We are not going for an ice, Warwick,” Dev said, and the boy’s face fell.
“It’s not educational, is it?”
“I thought you enjoyed learning.”
“Mostly, but I enjoy fun too.”
“I’m growing old here, and it’s cold, so stop tormenting us and speak, brother,” Cam said.
“We are going to the park to watch the balloon ascent,” James said.
“No!” Warwick cupped his face as color filled it. “Are we really?”
James nodded. Warwick, Emily remembered, had a fascination for ballooning and had been plaguing his family to take him to watch an ascent for some time.
“The conditions are perfect, as the day is cool and clear, with very little wind.”
“I want to fly in a balloon.”
“No, absolutely not,” Dev, Cam, Eden, and Essie all said as one in response to Warwick’s words.
“Why not? People do all the time, and I’m a person.”
“You are a young boy, and what’s more, our younger brother. We have no wish to watch you floating many feet above the earth, with the prospect that at any time you could plunge down into it at speed,” Dev said.
“I still want to,” Warwick grumbled. “Did you know that the first person to fly in a balloon was Vincenzo Lunardi in 1784?”
Dev look pained as he urged his little siblings toward the carriage, and Emily knew that those traveling with Warwick would be deluged with facts about ballooning.
The journey was not a long one and undertaken with Samantha giving them an overview of what they had all just seen, which Emily did not mind, as it gave her time to think.
Perhaps she should leave London for Raven Castle, and stay there until she no longer felt anything but annoyance for Cambridge Sinclair once more? Just a brief break would surely do it?
No it won’t.
Bloody bothering hell!
CHAPTER SEVENTEEN
The park was full of people and carriages. The day was brisk, but lovely, and everyone wore warm clothing to ward off the chill.
Cam had Somer by the hand and was inspecting the balloon with the rest of their party. His eyes constantly strayed to Emily, who had Samantha attached. The little girl was asking her questions, to which she responded patiently.
Sweet, he thought. Sweet and far too disturbing.
“Good day to you, Miss Tolly. How fortuitous it is to have chanced upon you once more this day!”
Cam was fast coming to the conclusion that Jackson had designs on Emily. He had appeared first at the bookstore, then the warehouse. Today there was the dressmaker’s, and now again here. Once was a coincidence, twice perhaps, but his appearance here was not, which suggested he was following them. Locating Max, he left Somer with Dev and went to speak with him.
“That man needs to be warned off.”
Max looked at Emily and Jackson.
“Why?”
“He is not right for Emily, you said so yourself. God’s blood, you only need to look at him to see he is not worthy of her. There is also the matter of his effusive behavior. It’s nauseating.”
“Jackson is harmless, Cam. Yes, I’ve had a time or two to question his business dealings, but for the most he is respected and tolerated. I must own that he would not be my choice for her, but Emily has her own mind, and should she be receptive to any approach from him—”
“What?” Cam actually shook his head. “You cannot be serious, that man is not good enough for her!”
Max studied Cam with a look that was not entirely comfortable.
“That is for her to establish, not you, and as it is likely she will not have many eligible men falling about themselves to marry her. If she chooses Jackson, there will be little I can do to stop the union.”
“She deserves more from you and James. That man is not the right one for her.”
Cam refused to be intimidated by the look Max gave him, or curl his toes inside his boots. He had said too much and alerted Max to the fact Emily unsettled him. So he retreated... for now. But Jackson would not be approaching Emily in any capacity if he had a say in the matter. Which granted he would likely not, but still, he could put a word or two in James’s ear.
“I am in awe of your beauty and knowledge, Miss Tolly.”
Snapping his teeth together as he heard Jackson’s effusive words, Cam moved to stand beside Emily. Too close, but it forced Jackson back a step.
“Good day, Mr. Sinclair.”
“Mr. Jackson.”
“I was just telling dear Miss Tolly that she is to be commended on her knowledge of ballooning.”
“You sound surprised that she is knowledgeable on such a matter, Mr. Jackson.”
The man’s condescending smile was enough to have Cam itching to wipe it off with his fist.
“Well now, we know that a woman need only certain skills to make a man happy, don’t we, Mr. Sinclair? A woman’s beauty and refinement are all that counts to the man she will one day marry. Her sole purpose can surely be in attaining those qualities, for what use is there for anything else?”
Emily made a choking sound, but a look at her face showed nothing. She was composed, as she always was, but those eyes told a different story. They were the icy gray of the skies on a stormy day.
Excellent. Jackson had put his foot firmly in his mouth; Cam just needed to make sure he choked on it now.
“So you believe a woman’s place is to devote her attentions entirely on the man she marries. She can have nothing else to occupy her but that single purpose?” He leaned in slightly, feigning interest. Jackson took the bait, delighted to be able to impart his knowledge to Cam, and of course Emily. The fool.
“Oh indeed, for what other purpose can they have?”
“I think that a very narrow viewpoint, Mr. Jackson.”
Of course it was Eden who arrived first to defend her kind. She’d heard every word, and her eyes were blazing. Jackson looked stunned at her words. Cam simply folded his arms and prepared to enjoy the next few minutes.
“Your Grace.” He bowed deeply, his nose nearly touching his knee. “Forgive me, I had not meant to offend you.”
Jackson looked panicky now, his eyes going from Emily to Eden, then lastly Cam for support. Cam gave him a pained look to suggest he supported the man, hoping his foot would become wedged so tight inside his
mouth, he’d choke. He knew enough about the women in his life to understand that Mr. Jackson would soon leave with his ears blistered.
“Do you believe a woman can offer nothing but excellent household management skills, and that her main focus is to ensure her husband’s every comfort is met?”
“Is that how it’s meant to be?” James asked Dev. Both had approached to enjoy the moment.
“Well, it’s news to me if it is. Perhaps I should have a word with Lilly,” Dev said, smiling as his wife joined the fray. “I wouldn’t mind my every need met,” he added.
“The wait will be a long one, my lord,” his wife said, but her eyes were focused on Jackson, who was now surrounded by women. The men, Cam included, were standing a few feet back with the children, enjoying the situation hugely.
“Oh, well, of course there are indeed different marital situations, but I have always found the man to be in charge.” Jackson battled on gamely, although now his face was parchment white.
“Jackson, run now while you have everything intact. It will not be pretty if you do not,” Max suggested.
“I did not mean to offend,” he said stiffly. Obviously he was used to men who enjoyed the power in their households, which was of course the norm in most marriages. Cam’s family, however, had always been slightly different. Strong women were a source of pride to their husbands... and brothers.
“Perhaps I could prevail upon dear Miss Tolly to walk with me awhile.”
“Thank you, but no, Mr. Jackson,” Emily said, much to Cam’s relief. He’d feared her kind heart may have her sympathizing with the man. “I am here with my family, and should not like to leave them.”
He bowed, and when he rose the expression on his face showed his frustration. Good riddance.
“We must retreat now, as the balloon is about to leave,” Cam said as he saw the preparations had begun. He was feeling quite happy with the Jackson outcome, and once again at peace with the world... well as peaceful as he could be with his tormenter standing a few feet away.
“Trouble,” Essie said softly. “Something is wrong.”
The Sinclair’s were suddenly alert. Sniffing the air, Cam sensed it too. Something was stirring, but he could not see the cause.