“I know… I wanted to… I’m sorry Cait, I really am. I just… I just wanted to make sure he was safe. I didn’t want you to hate me,” Venom responded.
There was silence in the room for a moment as Caitlyn obvious fought for some kind of response. Xander felt his own nerves at the situation. If this ended up going south, he was going to be left in a horrible position and possibly lose one of the most important people in his life. Even though Taz and Venom were in a weird place, it hadn’t affected the group hanging out together, but if Caitlyn and Venom were at odds, he knew it would have a huge impact. He had to do something
“Cait…,” he started, only to have his wife look at him with a glare and a finger on her lips. With a soft sigh, he shook his head slightly and stepped back.
“Riley. You and me have been friends for how long? Five years? I have had your back in every fight, been there every time a relationship went awry, and was generally there when you needed me,” Cait said, getting closer to Venom with each sentence she spoke.
“I know you have…,” Venom started
“Don’t interrupt me, Riley,” Caitlyn snapped. Xander could feel the hairs on the back of his neck rising. He hoped he didn’t need to get involved. His wife was adept at killing and had done it more times that he cared to remember. “We were unstoppable together. Since the team broke, we’ve all drifted apart. The fact that you had to hide this from me hurts.”
“Cait, it wasn’t that I had to... I just didn’t want you to be mad at me. I couldn’t deal with you hating me, too,” Venom quickly interjected as Caitlyn stood right in front of her.
“That’s the problem; you shouldn’t be afraid to tell me anything. You’re my best friend,” Caitlyn said, her arms wrapping around Venom’s tense body. In that moment, Xander felt all the worry fall from him.
*****
As she felt her friend's arms wrap around her, it took a moment for Venom to realize what was happening. With tears threatening her eyes, she hugged Caitlyn back, burying her face in her shoulder. It had been so long since she had been this close to Caitlyn that she found herself not wanting to let go.
“You are like the only girl that can actually stand me,” Caitlyn said with a chuckle that was muffled against Venom’s hair.
Well, if you weren’t such an evil bitch...,” Venom teased back as she hugged her friend a little tighter.
“Next time something like this happens, you have to tell me, alright? I could have helped or at least… I don’t know,” Caitlyn said as she pulled back and rubbed her eyes. The emotionally strong combat monster was getting a little tearful, and that was something that didn’t happen often.
“I’ll remember that,” Venom replied. With a deep sigh, she summoned the courage to ask the one question she needed an answer to. “Do you forgive me?”
“As long as you promise to get yourself clean and talk to me about things like this in the future,” Caitlyn responded with a stern expression and a finger pressed against Venom’s chest.
“I promise,” Venom replied with a solemn nod.
“Now I love you, but I really need to spend some time with my husband,” Caitlyn said, a smirk growing on her face. Venom gave them both hugs before leaving the apartment.
The feeling of the gentle misty rain on her face was refreshing as Venom stepped out of Xander and Caitlyn’s place. The interaction had been as terrifying as expected, but she was thankful when her friends forgave her. All she wanted now was to curl up in her bed and sleep for a week or until the DTs stopped, but there was one more thing she had to do. Xander and Caitlyn hadn’t been the only people she had hurt in this. She had to make things right with Jacques. Even if he didn’t come home with her, or if he refused to forgive her, she had to try.
Xander had told her where he was staying, and a message to his teammate, Lucy, had provided her the address. After a quick jaunt across town, she found herself standing at the strange door. It took her longer than she liked to bring herself to knock. It was answered by Lucy, the effervescent blonde who was a part of Jacques’ team.
“You alright? You don’t look great,” Lucy said as her eyes surveyed Venom. It was frustrating that Venom was growing used to that comment. She knew she looked like shit, and the tremor was becoming impossible to conceal.
“Tough couple of days, nothing to really worry about,” Venom replied as she drew down her sleeves to cover her hands. “Is he here?”
“Yeah, he is, come in,” Lucy said stepping out of the way of the door. Venom slipped past, glad to be out of the cold. “So what even happened between you two? I didn’t realize there was trouble in paradise”.
“I fucked up… I said some things that I didn’t really mean. Like I said, it’s been a tough couple of days,” Venom explained. She really didn’t fancy getting into the details of what happened. It appeared that Jacques hadn’t told his team, and that was something she was thankful for.
“It’s cool if you don’t want to talk about it. We all have secrets… you and I need to get a drink some time, though. It’s been awhile since we partied properly,” Lucy responded with a friendly smile. Venom was glad Lucy read the social cues and dropped the subject.
“Yeah, give me a week or so to sort my shit out, and we’ll hit neon,” Venom responded, knowing she wasn’t going to be good company if she was still detoxing. Right now, lazing on the couch seemed like too much effort.
“I’ll hold you to that,” Lucy said before pointing up the stairs. “First door straight ahead from the stairs. Thunder-face hasn't left in a few days, moody fucker.”
Venom nodded with a small smile before taking the stairs slowly. This wasn’t a conversation she really wanted to be having. As she stopped at the next door, she wanted to be just about anywhere else but here. With a deep sigh, she knocked. Hearing his voice call from within, she stepped inside. The back of the sofa was to the door, but she could just make out the shape of a body beneath a blanket.
“Hey… can we talk?” Venom said quietly from the open doorway. Jacque suddenly jolted into a sitting position. He looked a little dazed and confused as he started to rearrange the blanket over him.
“V! What are you doing here?” he asked, his eyes narrowing slightly.
“I wanted to talk… can I come in?” she asked nervously as she started slowly into the room. Never since she met him had she felt this awkward and uncomfortable around him.
“Uh… Okay. You can’t kick me out of here, so I guess that’s alright,” he said coldly, the tone of his voice cutting through her like a knife. As his eyes ran the length of her, his face seemed to soften, before he indicated to the chair opposite him. “Maybe you should sit down.”
Venom’s head dropped forward as the warmth grew in her cheeks. She felt immense shame and guilt from kicking him out. He hadn’t deserved it. Slowly, she moved to the chair; her body was still feeling weak, and she didn’t want to fall. Lowering herself into the chair, she clutched her hands together between her knees. She wasn’t entirely sure whether the tremors and sweating were caused by detoxing or nerves.
“I… umm… I wanted to apologize about what happened… I… uh… fucked up,” Venom stuttered as she felt the last of her confidence drift away. She pulled back her hood with shaking hands and wiped the cold sweat from her forehead.
“What am I seeing here? Are you still using, or is this… ?” he said, indicating to her, his gaze narrowing with speculation.
“This?” Venom asked looking down at her hands in her lap. “This is a serious case of detoxing… I feel like I might die.”
“Well, you’re not hyperventilating in a hospital bed, so I’m sure you’ll be fine,” he said coldly as he leaned forward and grabbed an open beer. He took a swig and settled back on the couch. “Your business is your own, but tell me, was it worth it?”
“I know it’ll seem like I’m making excuses, and I know I can’t take back what happened, but I was being threatened…,” Venom whispered, dipping her head again, no matter wha
t, she couldn’t look at him, “...I was scared and things… they just got worse”.
“And… so… no request for help? No call for assistance to anyone? Happy to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders because you’re the only one who could fix it?” Jacques snapped as he stood up, secured the bedsheet around his waist, and began pacing the room. Venom watched him as her mind tried desperately to construct some sentence to get her out of trouble. He stopped behind the couch and placed both his hands on it. “You changed into a totally different person in just a handful of days.”
“I’m sorry. I was scared to involve anyone in case it incriminated them, also. I thought they were going kill me,” she spoke with candor and shame as she clutched her hands tightly together to try and stop the tremors, but it just made it worse.
“Has the issue been resolved?” he inquired as he moved around the room, collecting some clothes. His disinterested tone made her feel like he was just going to walk out on her mid-conversation.
“Yes... well, at least I hope so. I just have to hope there are no more repercussions,” she said. After what had happened, she hoped the SUN were happy and she didn’t lose another friend to them.
“Um… ok. Can I ask what this is about?” he asked as he stopped searching and focused his full attention on her. She really didn’t want to recite the tale again, she just wanted to put the whole incident behind her, but he deserved some sort of answer. If she brushed him off, this was likely the last time she was going to see him. There may be no repairing the void in the friendship if she didn’t show him how severe things had been.
“Ok. A couple of weeks ago, I went out to a hack bar. I ended up in this competition and stole something I shouldn’t have. Things got out of control, and they took Xander as ‘insurance’... I fucked up big,” Venom admitted. Thinking of what happened just made the shame stronger.
“Xander… Blue? Where is he? Is he okay?... Who are ‘they’?” he asked quickly, his face growing more concerned with each question.
“He’s alright now… a little shaken up, but he’s alright. It’s all my fault, though…,” she replied. In a way, she didn’t want to be absolved of her guilt. Maybe that way, it would keep the reminder fresh why she should ask for help. Jacques didn’t respond immediately; he appeared deep in thought.
“I’m sure whatever happened was accidental. You wouldn’t knowingly risk others… especially Blue. Sometimes people get in over their heads… it happens,” he said. Venom was surprised. This entire time she had been getting a real ‘fuck off’ vibe from him, but something had changed. His understanding demeanor was a world away from what she expected from him.
“Yeah. I really kinda fucked up… ,” she said as she struggled to think of any better response. In her detoxing state, she had windows of clarity, and this one was drawing to a close. She could feel the churn in her stomach and the ache behind her eyes returning. She hoped she could make this right before her body forced her to leave here. “I didn’t just fuck up with him… I fucked up with you, too.”
“I’m fine,” he said bluntly with a shrug.
“But you and me aren’t,” she replied with a sad smile.
“We’ll get over it,” he said simply with a weak smile that quickly faded. He went back to collecting his things. She had felt like they were getting somewhere, but now she wasn’t so sure. As he came close to her, she reached out and grabbed his hand, forcing him to stop and look at her.
“Please… how do I make this right?” she asked weakly. She was usually such a strong confident person, but losing another friend was something she couldn’t deal with. Even more so because it was through her own stupidity. His hands tightened around hers, and he pulled her to her feet, and as the window of clarity was closing, she could feel the weakness back in her legs. She found him looking directly into her eyes.
“One step at a time. First, I accept your apology. You mean a lot to me, and I just want to help,” Jacques said, leaning forward and placing a gentle kiss on her forehead. “Second, promise me you won’t get yourself into this state again, it’s bad juju,” he added as he snaked his arms around her waist, drawing her into a tight embrace. “And third… help me find my pants, they’re here somewhere.”
With his hold on the bedsheet gone, the fabric had slowly made the journey down to the floor, leaving all 5 feet 9 inches of his naked body pressed against her. Venom gave a small smile that quickly grew into a grin and then into half laughing and half crying.
“Trust me, I never intend to touch that shit anymore… and pants? When have you ever needed pants?” she said as she rested her head on his chest and wrapped her arms around him. It felt so good to be able to hug him, to be able to touch him. She cared little that he was naked, since neither of them had ever been shy around the other.
“I’ve needed them since I’ve been smooshing my perfect ass on other people’s stuff. Steve’s pillow being an exception,” he said arrogantly with a sly grin.
“Well… how would you feel about smooshing your ass back on my couch?” she asked, looking away, unable to meet his gaze. If he refused her, she wasn’t sure she wanted to see the look in his eyes.
“Only if you smoosh yours next to mine, or on my face, but whatever,” he said with a snort at his own comment. Venom felt all the tension in her shoulders ease as she cuddled into him a little tighter, and the tears and laughter came stronger. She was glad to have her friend back.
“I really don’t think you want to see me with no clothes on at the moment…,” she said with a smile as she pulled back and wiped the tears from her face. Considering how pale, shaky, and sweaty she was, it wouldn’t be an attractive sight.
“Won’t actually see much if I’m wearing you like a mask,” he said, looking down at her with a cheeky grin. She knew if she gave him the chance, he would go through with it, “Was kinda hoping that we could have make-up sex in Steve’s bed, but it probably smells like boot polish and shame in there.”
“In all honesty, right now, I want to get home and get in the bath. My skin is so sensitive that my clothes feel like sandpaper,” she explained as a powerful tremor ran through her body. Any sex would have to wait until the detoxing had run its course.
“That’s fine. Let’s get you home for a bath, a hot meal, and some caffeine,” Jacques said with a friendly smile as his hands drifted down her arms, causing goosebumps to raise over her skin.
“Well, you can drive. With these tremors, it’s a terrifying experience right now,” she said, fishing around in her pockets for the keys.
“Sure, but I’ll have to dash to the car. It looks chilly out there,” he said as he looked down at his naked self before glancing around the room, “Unless….”
“They’re down the back of the couch,” she said with a smirk.
“You knew, and you let me stand here naked,” he said cheekily as he put his hands on his hips.
“What can I say, it’s a good view,” she responded with a laugh as she lowered herself into a chair. She was afraid of falling. He shook his head slightly before turning his attentions back to gathering his clothes together.
After what she could honestly say was one of the worst weeks of her life, things seemed to be finally falling into place. After making up with all those she had wronged, she had to be sure not to do it again. Once the detoxing was done, and she was back to work, then things would be entirely back to normal.
Epilogue
Venom woke up to the sound of her alarm going off. She groaned slightly. The warmth of a naked body pressed against her back felt so good, but now to face the cold. Untangling herself from Jacques’ arms, she slipped from the bed. Unlike him, she had a shift to get to. That was one thing she missed about being a standard operative. There had been a lot less scheduled work to do but the paycheck sucked compared to hers now.
“Where you going?” Jacques mumbled, mostly into the pillow.
“Work, and if you’re going to share the bed, wear boxers,” she playfu
lly teased as she started to dress. When the temperature dropped, he had moved from the sofa into the bed to save on heating costs. They weren’t a couple, she knew his heart belonged elsewhere, but for now he was a good fuck and a great radiator.
“No,” he replied defiantly before the sounds of his gentle snores punctuated the air. With a chuckle, she shook her head and headed out into the lounge. Grabbing her bag, she made her way down to the car and started the drive to the office. Today she felt good.
It had been four weeks since her incident with the NeuroPep and the SUN. The detoxing had lasted three days, but it felt like months. That was something that she was never letting happen again. It hadn’t stopped the occasional Sense or Xcite at the club, but she was staying strictly away from stimulants. A sound from her comms brought her attention to a new message.
::I have a hack going down tonight and need a decent exploit hacker. I’ll pay. You in? NexusReaper::
She smiled at the request and sent a voice message accepting the invitation. Since the hack together, he had invited her to work with him more and more. It seemed like she had thoroughly proven herself to him. The one off hacks were a nice boost to her bank balance. It meant she might be able to move soon. Hopefully, into a nice little apartment in Central that she’d wanted for so long.
As she parked in the structure at work, she put in her earbuds and turned on some music, some nice upbeat Twinkle Pop Grunge to start the day. Walking the short distance to the office, she brought up her gauntlet’s AR interface and started looking through the host of messages that she had received while she slept. Some of them made her chuckle to herself. Like one from Jacques in the middle of the afternoon telling her to ‘buy milk’. She had no idea why he’d woken in the middle of the day and remembered that before going back to sleep. A new message came in.
::You and me, club tomorrow? Xan is going to look after the kid. Cait::
It turned out everything had just had to get a little screwed up before she and her friends could get back to normal. She, Taz, Caitlyn, and Xander had even managed to go out for a night together. It had been good for the four of them to party again.
Caustic (The Seraphim Network - Everyday Series Book 1) Page 15