by Andrea Thome
Laina was incredulous. “You saved my life! He was going to rape me. And who knows what after that? I’m not sure how to thank you.” Laina studied Logan’s mother, who’d clearly been crying herself. “Logan looks so much like you. He has your eyes. Your coloring.” Laina’s voice quaked. “How is he going to feel about me after this?”
Janice huffed. “Don’t you think like that. This wasn’t your fault. Damn that animal. If you start to let what he tried to do to you—and failed to do—change you, then he wins. You won’t let him win, will you?”
Laina shook her head, closing her eyes.
“Good. Then it’s settled. You fought back the best you could. It’s not a fair fight when it’s man versus woman. The rotten ones know that. It’s why they do these things when they have no other way to feel powerful against us. It’s really just a sign of their own weakness.”
Laina wondered if Logan’s mother was speaking from personal experience, but she sensed it wasn’t the right time to ask. Instead, she had another question. “Why were you at my house?” Laina studied Jan’s face as she considered her answer.
“Honestly? I’m not sure. I wanted to know more about you, since Buck says my son is hopelessly in love with you. I don’t know what I thought to gain by my visit. I doubt I would have been able to muster up the courage to knock on your door if I hadn’t seen what was happening.”
Laina sighed. “Thank God you were there. It doesn’t matter why. You were my angel tonight. I’ll never be able to repay you.”
Janice smiled. “Are they taking good care of you here?” She poured Laina a glass of water from the pink plastic pitcher on her tray, handing it to her so she could take a sip.
“Yes. They want to keep me for the night for observation until my blood work comes back from the lab in the morning. Standard procedure, I guess, since I suffered a concussion.” Laina took another sip of her water. “Would you mind staying with me? Just until Logan arrives. I don’t want to be alone right now.”
Janice stepped into the hall to send word with the nurse to Buck that she’d be waiting with Laina, and by the time she got back, the girl was curled up in the fetal position, sleeping peacefully. Janice dragged the padded chair over next to Laina’s hospital bed and reclined herself, but not before taking the girl’s hand in her own.
That’s exactly how Logan found them when he arrived a short time later.
Buck had already explained everything after Logan and Van had arrived at the hospital to find him fast asleep in the waiting room. The drive had been intense, as their imaginations ran fast and loose with the few details they’d been given. Buck had tried to call them back after he’d talked to Janice, but both of their phones had died, dumping him directly into voice mail.
Van agreed to wait in the lobby with Buck, allowing Logan to see Laina privately first.
Logan stood in the doorway of Laina’s hospital room, watching the two women sleep, listening to the faint beep of the machine monitoring Laina’s vital signs. He’d never felt so relieved in all his life, and in that moment, he felt his heart crack wide open. There was still love there for the woman who’d raised him. She’d done her best, and yes—she’d failed. Often. But what she’d done for him that night would make up for a thousand disasters. His future lay in that hospital bed, holding hands with his past. It was a beautiful, powerfully complex moment, one Logan would never forget.
Janice opened her eyes as if she’d sensed his presence. Her voice cracked when she spoke. “Son. I’m so sorry.” She didn’t move, not sure what he was thinking.
Logan walked over to where she sat, reaching for her hand and pulling her up into his embrace. They stood that way for a long time, not speaking. Logan could feel his mother’s sobs as he fought back tears of his own. Life was too precious. Too short not to move forward. Nothing would be gained by looking back.
“Logan.”
They stepped apart at the sound of Laina’s voice. She’d been watching them, her own cheeks wet. Logan rushed to sit next to her, brushing the hair off her forehead to place a kiss there where the skin had been split open from the force of Jeremy’s blow.
“My God, Laina. I’m so sorry I wasn’t there to protect you from that animal. I promise you he will never hurt you again.”
Laina shook her head. “He won’t hurt anyone again, thanks to your mom. She’s got incredible aim. She showed up just in time. Another minute and . . .”
She couldn’t finish, the lump in her throat getting in the way of verbalizing what could have been.
Van appeared in the doorway, with Buck behind him. Laina smiled meekly, motioning for them to come in. Buck stood by Janice, taking her hand in his, while Van bent over Laina, kissing her cheek before standing up to study her.
“That daft prick should have known better than to mess with you ladies. Now he’ll spend the rest of his days as a nutless wonder in prison. Serves him right.” He turned to Janice. “Donovan Laird, ma’am. But please call me Van. All my friends do. After what you did for our lass tonight, I’d say you fall in that category.”
Janice smiled, glancing nervously at Logan before dropping her eyes to the floor. “Thank you, Van. My son is a lucky man to have such loyal friends.”
Logan looked around the room at each of them, overcome by emotion, relief, and exhaustion all at the same time. “I’d say we’re all lucky. To have each other.”
EPILOGUE
April
The call came in the middle of the night. It had been snowing heavily when they’d gone to bed, and a quick peek out the bedroom window told Logan that the spring storm hadn’t let up. It was a real-life snow globe, with the absence of wind having allowed the huge white flakes to accumulate with impressive fluffiness.
Laina groaned and rubbed her swollen belly, wondering how she was going to make herself get up. It was getting harder to sleep each night, what with the foot or elbow or whatever other body part was jutting up into her ribs. She didn’t have to struggle long because Logan had heard her from their bathroom and came rushing out to help. His face was still dotted with shaving cream, his hips wrapped in a white towel.
“Here, love, let me help you.” He sat beside Laina, wrapping one arm behind her back and using his hand to help her sit up. “If you want to stay here, I can go to the hospital by myself. It’s pretty snowy out there. I don’t want you out on the roads if you don’t have to be.”
Laina swung her legs over the side of the bed, letting her swollen feet gratefully touch the cool floor. She’d been about to speak when she’d gotten confirmation of what she’d suspected all night long. “Logan, you know I wouldn’t miss the birth of your first child for anything. Anything that is, except for the birth of our first child.”
Laina grimaced, disappointed by the poor timing. They’d gotten the call just fifteen minutes before from Sienna, telling them that Viv had been admitted to the hospital, and that she was already pretty deep into her labor. Sienna suggested that if Logan still wanted to be there, he’d better head to the hospital to join them before dawn.
Logan studied Laina with a concerned look on his face. “Are you OK, Carina?” He got off the bed and squatted down in front of her, looking worriedly into her eyes. “Is it the baby?”
Laina exhaled slowly, smiling at Logan while she reached to wipe the remaining bits of shaving cream off his cheeks with her fingertips. “Oh, it’s most definitely the baby. Either your children are coming into this world already very in tune with each other, or they are racing to see who can be the first to be born.” She winced, taking another slow breath before continuing. “Vivian may have a slight lead, but the way these pains are starting to intensify now that I’m sitting up, I’d say I’ll be catching up pretty quickly. For a guy who wasn’t sure he wanted to be a dad a year ago, you’re about to have your hands full.”
Logan’s heart raced, and he stood up, looking around the bedroom in a panic. “I’ll get dressed right now. Oh my God. I can’t believe this is happening.” He le
aned in to kiss Laina before rushing to throw on a pair of jeans and an old sweater he’d just unpacked that afternoon.
Logan rushed down the stairs to make Laina a cup of hot tea for the ride while she finished getting dressed.
Glancing outside the kitchen window at the swirling snow, Logan was relieved once more that he’d been able to persuade Laina to move into town instead of continuing to live at the ranch. He knew that, in this weather, the roads beyond Walland House were likely impassable by now. They’d found out about her pregnancy the morning after her attack, when the blood work results came back, but Logan and Laina had initially kept the news to themselves until they’d had time to get over the shock. Laina hadn’t been able to go back to her old place after what had happened with Jeremy, so they’d sold it almost immediately. She’d been staying with Logan at the ranch house until the week before when they’d finally closed on this home they’d bought together in the West End.
They’d had some work done to the new house, and managed to integrate their styles in a way that made the new place feel like it belonged to both of them. The kitchen was Logan’s favorite, anchored by antique hardwood floors and the beautiful mint-green vintage appliances they’d ordered to offset the wood beams on the ceiling and the hand-scraped white brick walls.
As he slid his boots and coat on, Logan paused to smile at their wedding picture, which sat framed on the bookcase next to the front door. He’d surprised her with the trip to Nepal in August, and he’d both proposed to and married her in the city where her parents had first found her. Logan had called her father to ask for her hand, surprised when Bo and Serena offered to fly over and attend the ceremony. The framed photograph was of the four of them, standing outside of the airport in Kathmandu, a tiny bouquet of flowers in Laina’s hand. It wasn’t the most romantic setting, but it had been special to them, as evidenced by the smiles on their faces. They’d thrown a huge party at Walland House and renewed their vows in front of family and friends a week after they’d returned. They shared the news that they were expecting that same evening, much to everyone’s delight. Thinking back now, Logan couldn’t imagine a time when he’d questioned his desire to be a father. But as he rushed outside to start the truck, he was acutely aware that the fear that Rex had warned him about had slowly crept in. The fear of loving something so deeply, he was terrified to lose it. That’s how he felt about his life now. He had a wife he adored, and within the next few hours, he’d have two babies to worry about. He knew his life was about to change forever.
Logan had just come back inside from shoveling the walk when he heard Laina call to him from the top of the stairs.
“OK, look out below. Here I come . . .”
Logan laughed, admiring his gorgeous wife as she descended the stairs toward him. She was exaggerating her physical presence, as usual. Logan thought he’d never seen her look more beautiful than she did that morning, with no makeup and a nervous look of expectancy on her face, one hand resting on her tummy as she walked. She stood on the landing and held Logan’s face in her hands before giving him a tender kiss. “Well, Daddy. We’d better get moving if you don’t want to have to build a roadside igloo to deliver your baby. Also, did you text our parents?”
Logan helped her down the final step and held the front door open for her as she stepped outside onto the porch. “Yep. Mine and yours. Your dad said they’d catch the first flight here and asked me to keep them posted. Mom and Buck will probably beat us to the hospital. And yes, your bag is already in the back seat.” He turned the key to lock the front door, taking Laina’s hand in his. “The next time we walk into this house together, we’re going to be someone’s mom and dad. Then it’s really going to start to feel like home.”
Laina turned to kiss him one more time before letting him help her into the passenger seat of the Bronco, snowflakes catching on her eyelashes as she looked at him. “My home is wherever you are. And it always will be.”
“Buck, be careful. We want to make sure we get there in one piece to meet those grandbabies.”
Janice still wasn’t used to the epic snowfall in the mountains, and she was very glad she hadn’t had to drive in it. She and Buck had been inseparable, especially since they’d moved in together in the fall. Janice still woke up most days feeling the need to pinch herself to make sure it wasn’t all one big dream. Logan had made huge strides in trusting her, and they’d worked hard at healing their fractured relationship. It helped that Janice was also determined to repair any damage she’d done with Willow. Janice worked with Buck parttime, helping him run the office out at the ranch, so she was around Walland House often enough that she’d been able to put forth an honest effort to get to know Logan’s sister, whom he adored. Janice was happy that their children would likely grow up together too; Willow and Garrett had just announced at Christmas that they, too, were expecting their first child together that summer.
Buck winked at her as he steered the truck through the unplowed streets, turning into the hospital parking lot. “I promised I’d get you here in one piece, honey, and here we are.” He pulled underneath the overhang to let her out at the front doors before parking his truck nearby to join Janice in the lobby where she stood waiting. Van rushed in just as they’d gotten directions to the family waiting area from a passing doctor, so they rode the elevator upstairs together.
“Hell of a night for a party. I guess these babies are going to have minds of their own, just like their parents.” Van raked a hand through his hair, squinting in an effort to wake up. “Let’s find a coffee maker and see if we can’t get some news out of one of these nurses.”
The only information that they were able to get was that there was no word yet about either couple. Their labors were progressing, but the nurses couldn’t say much more than that until either Sienna or Logan came out to share more. The first hour crept by, then the second. Morning dawned, but it was difficult to tell since the snow continued to fall, covering the world in white. Willow and Garrett arrived around seven, bringing with them a bag full of homemade breakfast sandwiches. Garrett walked up behind Van but stopped short when he saw that he was talking on the phone.
Van held up a finger as he finished his conversation before hanging up his cell phone in frustration. “Sorry. It’s this hotshot director who is going to be using our property in Oregon for a movie shoot this summer. I’m starting to wonder why I let my brothers talk me into this. We should have just started in on the renovations right away, but the price the studio offered us was too damned irresistible. And they wanted the place as is.” Van sighed. “They’re there scouting the location this weekend, and I’m getting calls every couple of hours with loads of questions.” He glanced at his watch. “I guess starting time is six a.m., West Coast. I keep saying I’ll be back on Monday, but you know these Hollywood types. They want their needs met yesterday.”
Garrett chuckled. “Are you regretting leaving already? Maybe you should keep your place here. Just in case.”
Van shook his head. “Nah. I’m not attached to it. I’m not sure I’m coming back here to live anytime soon. I moved here in the first place to support Laina, and I suppose that worked out just fine. But now that she’s settled, it’s time for me to figure out what the hell I want to do when I grow up. Maybe this project in Oregon is just the thing that will get me pointed in the right direction. If not, I can always come back when the renovations are finished.” He clasped Garrett by the arm, gesturing toward the man’s pregnant wife. “Besides, I’ve got to get out of Aspen. There seems to be something in the water.”
In the end, it was almost nine before the friends got the news. The snow had stopped falling, and, as was not uncommon after a Colorado storm, the sun prevailed in the bluebird sky, her warm rays slanting in through the windows of the waiting room, bathing them all in welcomed light.
The double doors leading from the birthing wing finally opened with a loud click, getting everyone’s attention.
Logan and Sienna walked towa
rd their friends and family together, holding hands. Each of them wore huge smiles but looked exhausted. Sienna spoke first.
“Our girls were amazing. I have a whole new respect for Vivian, for Laina, and for women everywhere. I just experienced an absolute miracle. Viv and I are the proud mommies of a beautiful baby girl, gifted to us by this incredible man standing here.” She paused to squeeze Logan’s hand and brush away her own tears. “Shanti Matthews Livingston joined our family this morning at eight forty-five. Seven pounds, four ounces of absolute perfection. She barely even cried.”
Logan grinned, bursting with news of his own. “And in true big-brother form, Oliver Ming Matthews beat his little sister to the finish line by exactly one minute and almost two pounds, weighing in at a svelte nine pounds two ounces. God bless my wife. She did it without any drugs. I’m not worthy.”
As everyone cheered and congratulated them, Logan couldn’t help feeling that, somehow, he really was worthy of it all. He knew in that moment, surrounded by the people that he loved the most, that he’d work every day to make sure he earned the privilege.
The privilege of belonging to the family he’d been born into, and to the family that he’d managed to create for himself, all at the same time.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
“Each friend represents a world in us, a world possibly not born until they arrive, and it is only by this meeting that a new world is born.”
—Anaïs Nin
Truer words were never spoken. Midway through this third and final book in the Hesse Creek Series, it finally clicked. The overarching theme of Walland, Seeds of Intention, and House of Belonging is about distinguishing the difference between the family we’re born into and the tribe we cobble together for ourselves over the course of a lifetime. I’ve moved a lot since I was a child, but I’ve managed to weave together a beautiful tapestry of people whom I hold so dear. Many of them don’t live near me but that doesn’t mean that if push came to shove, we wouldn’t be there for each other in a heartbeat. I’ve made my share of mistakes in life, but one thing I’ve done well is choose amazing friends. Some have been around for a season; a few have been here for a reason, but a precious few will last for a lifetime. I’m grateful for all of them, and for the lessons they’ve taught me—and continue to teach—about life and about myself.