by Jenny Frame
Bridge focused her gaze forward again and said nothing for a few minutes. “You know I can’t be this person when we go back to Axedale.”
Finn’s heart sank. “This is who you are, Bridge. You must face the fact you are a woman of God, who enjoys a normal, healthy sex life. The Church are the ones who are wrong, and you’ve told me that you have colleagues who have managed to live a normal life. Please, Bridge, I—”
“Don’t, Finn. I need time, time to think. Let’s go home.”
Finn was terrified that when they returned to Axedale, and Bridge was surrounded by the church and everything she thought she might lose, Bridge would retreat from her. Perhaps for good.
Chapter Nineteen
For the next few days, Bridge spent her time praying and trying to come to terms with her feelings for Finn. She felt in her heart that God did not want her to turn her back on a loving and fulfilling relationship, but the Church was way behind where she was sure God wanted them to be. After evening services, Bridge walked up to the stables at Axedale. Her mind was going at a million miles an hour, and she thought feeding the horses might help her clear her thoughts. She had seen much less of Finn since their excursion, and yet she thought about her even more. Deep inside she knew that when she went to London with Finn, she had opened a Pandora’s box. Not only were there the concerns about her vocation and her job, there was also a deep-seated fear that she would have to choose between her love of the Church, and her growing love for Finn. And even if she could take a chance and pursue this, Finn would leave sometime. Finn had demands and commitments that would force her to leave, and she would be heartbroken.
Bridge took out her phone and dialled Harry’s number, but it just went to her voicemail. “Hi, Harry, um…it’s nothing important. I just wanted a chat. Bye.”
She felt tears start to fall from her eyes, but heard the slamming of a car door outside, so she quickly wiped them away.
Quade came walking into the stable. “Bridge, you are a hard woman to get hold of. I called you a few times, but it just went to voicemail.”
Bridge forced a small smile on her face. “Sorry, Quade. I’ve needed some time to myself.”
Quade leaned against the stall and sighed. “Is this to do with our magician friend?”
She thought about saying no, but she couldn’t lie to Quade. “Yes, mostly. How did you know?”
“Finn’s been working with me today. Said she needed to take her mind off things with some hard work. Hasn’t seemed to help much—she’s had face like a a wet weekend all day.”
She knew Finn was hurting too, but Finn just didn’t see the risks she was taking. Bridge stroked the horse’s soft nose. “Yes, it’s about Finn. I’m falling in love with her.”
“Jesus Christ,” Quade said.
Bridge’s head snapped around. “Everyone has such bad language around me. I think you all forget I’m a vicar.”
“I’m sorry. What are you going to do? It’s clear Finn feels the same. She’s like a lovesick puppy.”
“I have no idea.”
Bridge heard another car door slam shut. “Who’s that?”
“Finn, she was following me in another truck,” Quade said.
“Oh, hell’s bells,” Bridge said in a panic. “I can’t face her right now.”
But it was too late. Finn walked in before she had the chance to leave. “Hi, sorry to interrupt,” Finn said.
“Don’t worry.” Quade clapped her on the back. “You helped me out a lot today, Finn. Could you do me one last favour and drive Bridge home?”
Bridget tensed immediately. She was being set up and she didn’t like it. “It’s okay, I’ll walk home.”
“No, I can take you,” Finn said. “I’m going that way anyway.”
“Great,” Quade said. “Thanks again, Finn, and I’ll see you later, Bridge.”
Then they were alone and there was an awkwardness in the air.
Finn finally broke the silence. “Do you come up here a lot, Bridge?”
Bridge gave Willow one last carrot and brushed down her skirt from the stray bits of straw and dust. “I try to come up every night. I promised Riley I’d feed her horse its nightly treat of carrots and make sure she isn’t lonely.”
Finn stepped beside her and put her hands on the stall door, so their fingers were inches apart. Bridge couldn’t take her eyes off them, and ached to touch her.
“Riley? That’s your Harry and Annie’s daughter, yes?”
Bridge nodded. “Yes, that’s right.”
Finn shook her head angrily. “Why are you being so cold, Bridge? You can’t keep hiding from me.”
“I’m not hiding from you. I’m trying to sort out things in my mind.”
“Things?” Finn was getting so frustrated. “You want to sort out things? What, like how much we feel for each other?”
Bridge moved to walk to the door, but Finn caught her waist and pushed her back against the side of the stables and said, “How we can’t keep our hands off each other?”
When Finn moved in for a kiss, Bridge pulled her head back by her fringe, and said firmly, “We don’t take without asking. I thought I had made that perfectly clear.”
Oh God. Finn groaned internally. That voice, the way Bridge talked to her, made Finn’s sex throb instantly. She would do anything for this woman if she commanded it, but she had to want her too.
“I’m sorry. I—the past few days have been so hard. I just wanted to see you. I can’t stop thinking about you.”
Bridge cupped Finn’s cheeks and whispered, “I know. I just need time to talk to God and make sure I’m doing the right thing. Please, darling. Just give me a little more time.”
Finn nodded, and sighed audibly. “If that’s what you want.”
“I do. Drive me back to the vicarage, would you?”
“My pleasure,” Finn said.
Finn helped Bridge up into the Land Rover and started to drive her home. Although she had pledged to give Bridge time, her frustration was still there, and it was eating away at her. They should be cherishing every moment of their relationship, not worrying about what God thought, what the bishop thought. This was their life. Yet again God was dictating Finn’s happiness, and she didn’t like it.
She pulled into the vicarage driveway and saw a car she didn’t recognize.
“Bloody hell,” Bridge exclaimed. “It’s Bishop Sprat.”
“Your bishop?” Finn said.
Bridge nodded, and was clearly panicking. “Why is he here? We don’t have an appointment. He’s going to think something is going on.”
“There is something going on,” Finn noted.
“Please, Finn. This is my life.”
“Fine, I’ll help you out, then leave.” Finn slammed out of her door and walked around to the other side of the truck, just as Bishop Sprat’s chauffeur was opening his door and he got out.
Finn helped Bridge out and saw Bishop Sprat staring at them accusingly.
“I’ll see you later, Finn,” Bridge whispered.
“Claremont?” Bishop Sprat said sharply. “Is that her? Is that the atheist, Finnian Kane?”
Finn was furious at his question and his tone. “Yeah, I’m Finnian Kane, the ungodly atheist who’s been sent to spiritually corrupt your vicar.”
There was silence after that comment, and when she turned to look at Bridge, she looked shocked and hurt.
The reality of what Finn had said came crashing down on her. Oh, shit.
Bridge walked away from her towards the front door and didn’t look back once.
What have I done?
* * *
Bridge stood in front of her own desk in her study, while Bishop Sprat sat behind her desk in her chair. She felt like she had been called to the headmistress’s office at boarding school, only this was much more serious.
“I came to see you this evening because I’ve had complaints about your behaviour from your parishioners,” Bishop Sprat said.
“Parishioners o
r parishioner? Winchester, by any chance?” Bridge said.
Bishop Sprat sat back in the chair, and said smugly, “I’m not at liberty to discuss that, but after what I saw out there, thank goodness I came to see you.”
“She was only joking. Finn gave me a lift home, that’s all.”
“I told you the last time we spoke that your family connections can’t protect you forever, and it’s getting close to that time. Have you any idea what the press would do with this story? Besides the fact that you’re breaking every covenant you’ve made with God, and the Church.”
Bridge started to feel the panic of her church and her life slipping away from her. “I have not broken any covenant, with God or the Church.”
Bishop Sprat was silent for a moment. “Have you remained celibate, Miss Claremont?”
The question that she’d dreaded him asking, and he just came out with it.
“I think that the unwritten rule is that you don’t ask that question, My Lord. Do you ask your straight clergy that question?”
“I don’t have to. They are not engaging in immoral acts that the Bible condemns. I ask again, have you remained celibate, and are you engaged in an illicit affair with Finnian Kane?”
Bridget’s whole future flashed before her eyes. What could she say? God knew the secrets that she kept hidden in her heart.
“Well?” Sprat repeated.
* * *
Finn downed a bottle of lager, and immediately took another from the fridge. She just couldn’t believe she had said what she had to Bridge’s bishop. If she hoped to get Bridge onside she’d probably blown it now.
“Fucking idiot.”
Finn heard loud thumps on her front door, and she just knew it was Bridge. She put down her bottle and went to the door. As soon as she opened it, Bridge pushed through the door full of anger.
“Bloody Sprat. He wanted to discipline me. If I didn’t have friends in high places, I would have been called to a disciplinary meeting in London.”
Finn followed Bridge into the living room. “Bridge, I’m sorry if I made things worse—”
Bridge balled her fists and let out an angry sigh. “It’s not your fault—it’s that pompous bastard Winchester’s fault. He’s been sneaking behind my back, making phone calls to Sprat. Says he has seen evidence of my impropriety with his own eyes. Bloody fool. It would be bad enough if I was getting into a relationship with another woman, but not Finnian Kane the world-renowned atheist.”
Bridge was so angry she looked near tears, and then they started to fall.
“Bridge, don’t cry, please.”
Finn tried to take Bridge’s hand but she pushed it away. “No, don’t touch me, don’t touch me right now.”
Bridge turned away from her and stood in front of the fire. Her hands were shaking with emotion. The anger she had stormed over here with started to morph to something else as soon as she saw Finn’s contrite and emotional face. She was angry at the bishop for making her think what she had with Finn was wrong, immoral, and angry at the Church for dragging their feet into the twenty-first century.
She turned around and her heart ached when she looked at Finn. How could anything be bad about falling for this woman?
“I’m so sorry, Bridge. You’ve been so good to me and helped me through my grief. I’m sorry what we have between us is bringing you unhappiness.”
Bridge stepped closer and reached out to caress Finn’s cheek. “You know I had to stand there and deny that I had any kind of sexual relationship with you?”
“I’m so sorry.”
Bridge couldn’t stop herself from touching Finn some more, and she ran her fingers through her hair. She searched Finn’s eyes and only saw mirrored the want she felt inside. Her breathing became shallow and she couldn’t take her eyes off Finn’s lips. “I had to deny what I felt for my beautiful boy.”
Finn turned her head and kissed her palm. “Then don’t, Mistress.”
Bridge broke and kissed Finn hard. When they broke apart, Finn breathed, “Please may I touch you, Mistress?”
“Yes, you may.” Bridget gasped when Finn took her hand and placed it on the fly of Finn’s jeans.
“I remembered what you told me,” Finn whispered. “That you would like me to be always ready for you. I wanted to please you.”
Their lips came crashing together with pure and utter passion. Bridget shrugged off her jacket and pulled Finn’s T-shirt off. It was such a turn on to have Finn ready for her, ready to give her pleasure.
She scratched her nails down Finn’s bare chest, knowing how much she’d enjoyed it the last time.
“I’m sorry,” Finn said.
“I’m not,” Bridge replied.
“Bridge, please…”
“Please what, beautiful boy?” Bridge loved to hear Finn ask for what she wanted.
Finn kissed her neck while she grasped Bridge’s thighs. “I want to be inside you, please.”
Bridge rubbed Finn’s strap-on through her jeans. “You want to be inside me with your cock? Would that make you feel good?”
Finn put her arms around Bridge’s waist and held her in a tight embrace while she nodded in the crook of Bridge’s neck.
Bridge’s sex clenched, and she shivered at the sweet request. Bridge realized in this one embrace that this was real. They were so sexually in tune with each other. Each gave the other something she needed. Finn needed a place in her arms where she could be vulnerable and let go, and Bridge needed to take care of Finn and give her what she needed.
“You ask so sweetly, how could I refuse? Go and sit on the couch.”
Bridge took off her black blouse and dog collar and threw them to the side. She resented them at this moment. She resented that they’d made her lie, made her deny someone she was falling in love with.
Bridge needed to feel what she had with Finn, after denying it. She needed to revel in everything that made their blossoming relationship. Finn sat on the couch, muscles visibly taut, waiting for Bridge to give her what she needed.
Bridge stood in front of the couch and slowly took off her skirt and panties, leaving just her stockings, suspenders, and bra. She watched Finn’s eyes glued to every move her fingers made.
“Undo your belt, and pop open your jeans.”
She pointed to her stockings. “I think I’ll leave these and my stilettos on. You like them, don’t you, boy?”
“Yes.” Finn groaned.
Bridge raised an eyebrow. “Yes, what?”
Finn’s eyes went wide. “Yes, Mistress. I’m sorry.”
Bridget walked closer and said, “You’re lucky I don’t have my riding crop with me.”
Again, Finn groaned, and clenched her fists tight. She was clearly finding it difficult to remain still and not touch herself or Bridge.
Bridge decided to help her just a little bit. She eyed Finn’s crotch and said, “Take it out. Take out your cock and let me see what you’ve got for me.”
Finn fumbled opening her fly, so eager was she to follow Bridge’s instructions. She got her strap-on out and squeezed it in her hand.
“Good boy,” Bridge said.
She walked right up to the couch and straddled Finn’s lap. Finn’s hands were on her buttocks and thighs in a second. Bridge caught her hands and held them above her head.
“Tut, tut. Did I say you could touch me?”
“No, Mistress.”
“Keep them there and don’t move. I see you’re going to need some help remembering the rules.”
Bridge took off her bra and trailed it over Finn’s face before using it to tie Finn’s wrists above her head on the back of her couch. Finn shuddered when she pulled it tight. Bridge said, “Now my hands are free to keep you under control.”
Bridge grasped her hair and pulled her head back. When she looked into Finn’s eyes they looked totally lost in passion. She placed kisses all over Finn’s face and lips, and ended by biting her lip hard enough to make her jump.
“Just checking to see if
I had your attention. What would you like to do, boy?”
“I’d like to kiss your breasts and suck your nipples, Mistress.”
She leaned forward so Finn could pleasure her breasts with her mouth. Bridge groaned as Finn’s mouth sucked, and her tongue licked her nipples. She felt the electrical tug from her nipples right down to her sex, which was throbbing with anticipation of accepting Finn’s cock inside her.
Bridge needed this so badly, needed to revel in everything that she’d had to deny she wanted to her bishop. Without any more preamble, Bridge grasped Finn’s strap-on and positioned it so she could lower herself onto it. The feeling of it inching its way inside her, filling her up, was exquisite, and even more so that she was controlling it at all times.
When she let it fill her completely they both moaned out loud, and Bridge whispered in Finn’s ear, “Oh, you are my good boy. Don’t you dare thrust until I tell you to.”
“Yes, Mistress.” Finn struggled against her bonds, knowing she could get out at any time, but also knowing that she didn’t want to. Being under Bridge’s control was like nothing she could have ever imagined. Her heart hammered like a drum in her chest, her skin was covered in goosebumps, and everything—all her feelings of fear that she had messed everything up, frustration that they couldn’t just be together, and all her sexual energy—was centred in her groin, under her strap-on.
There was nothing she wanted more in the world than to thrust inside Bridge, but her mistress had said no.
Bridge grasped onto her hair as she raised herself up and down, riding Finn’s cock. Finn was starting to sweat, just with the effort of not moving her hips.
“Please, Mistress. Please can I thrust inside you?”
Bridge grasped her chin with thumb and forefinger, and said, “How much do you need to thrust?”
“More than anything, Mistress. Please, I’m going to explode. I need it.”
Bridge laughed softly and scratched her nails down Finn’s shoulders. “Did any of the little groupies you fucked make you feel like this? Hmm?”
Finn screwed up her eyes and began to gasp. Her urge to thrust was so bad. “No, never. I never felt anything till you touched me, Mistress.”