He nodded, glad to see she was at least realizing it was a dumb move, even if she didn’t sound one hundred percent remorseful for going at all. “Why did you meet him?”
She fidgeted. “He said he had information for me.”
“And you believed him?”
Her gaze cut to his. “Yes, and he did have information.”
“What was it?”
“I can’t tell you.”
“Jade—”
She held up a hand. “Jeremy, I’m serious. What he told me, he told me in absolute confidence. The only reason anyone even knew I was with him was because I screwed up. No one was ever supposed to know I spoke to him. It could put people in danger.” She truly wanted to protect Nathan, and somehow doing so made her feel more protected, but that might not make any sense to anyone else.
Tension knotted his shoulders as his molars locked. Taking a deep breath, he turned and mumbled, “I can’t do this.”
“Do what?”
“This,” he snapped, facing her. “I can’t sit here and act like everything’s normal when yesterday… I don’t want a relationship built around lies, Jade.”
Her body staggered back as fear cinched tight around her heart. “I’m not lying to you. I told you I was with him. We met at a café in New Castle. We talked and he told me some things I needed to know, but it changes nothing. He told me for my own peace of mind and I can’t take that information anywhere, so there’s really no point in talking about it. I just want to—”
“Have a normal holiday,” he finished. “Jade, you can’t have normal unless you’re honest with me.”
Her mouth tightened. “Is that what this is, then? An ultimatum? Either I tell you what he said or we break up?”
That was the complete opposite of his original intentions, but now he was tempted to see which side she’d choose. “No, but what if it was?”
Her resolve hardened before his eyes, her shoulders drawing up and her chin lifting. The vulnerability she’d battled so hard to cover over the past few months was gone, vanished as though it never even existed. This was the strong woman he fell for and part of him celebrated her return. But a bigger part feared she might actually walk away because of whatever secrets she shared with Nathan fucking Lithe.
“One day you’ll appreciate how strong my word is, Jeremy. I made Nathan a promise and I’m not going to break my word. I’m sorry if you can’t accept that. I wish you could because I don’t want this to change our relationship. It has nothing to do with us. It has to do with Nathan. It’s his secret to tell and he told me, not you, not Kat. Me.”
Letting out a slow breath, he accepted she wasn’t going to budge, not where Nathan’s personal business came into play. “Was yesterday the first time you met with him?”
“Yes.”
“How did he contact you?”
“Email. He looked up my professional profile online.”
Meeting her gaze with a harder one, he let her see how seriously he took her safety. “This is the last time you pull a stunt like this behind my back, Jade. I know how determined you can be, but if you ever sneak off and knowingly put yourself at risk again, we are going to have a problem.”
“Okay.”
“Okay?”
“Yes. I told you it wasn’t my smartest decision. I won’t do it again. I’m sorry I scared everyone. That was never my plan.”
He exhaled, supposing that was a better apology than her first attempt.
She stood and wrapped her arms around his neck. “Believe it or not, it means something that you worry about me.”
He leaned back and tipped her face up so he was looking into her eyes. “Woman, you owe me. That was more than worry. You scared the shit out of me.”
Her brow pinched and she lowered her stare. “I’m sorry.”
And he believed her. “I know. It’s over. Let’s put it behind us.”
Chapter Thirty-Four
After Jeremy left, Jade finished wrapping the last of her friends’ gifts. Though she didn’t celebrate Christmas, a sense of loss crept in as she stared at the towering pile of gifts for Mia.
Sliding open the drawer of the hutch, she tucked the tape and scissors away, pausing to brush her fingers lovingly over the silver menorah still sealed in its original packaging. It was the first investment she’d made in her future and it hurt knowing next Chanukah she wouldn’t be sharing her family traditions with a little one. Sighing, she closed the drawer.
She wasn’t allowed to dwell on the could-have-beens. She needed to live in the present and presently, she had a mess to clean up.
Selecting a small gift from the top of Mia’s pile, she grabbed her coat and went to fix a few wrongs. Ty opened the front door as soon as she knocked, but for the first time ever, he didn’t step aside and invite her in.
“Jade.”
She hated how awkward she’d made everything. “Hey, Ty. Can I come in? It’s cold out.”
“Kiki!” Mia’s voice rung from the rafters, as she bounded down the stairs and shoved Tyson’s towering body aside. “Who’s that present for?”
“Well, I have so many to carry over for Christmas, I figured I might as well bring one now.” She held the small wrapped box out for Mia and she snatched it right up, giving it a firm shake.
“Can I open it, Daddy?”
Tyson pretended there was a debate, but everyone knew he could deny her nothing. “Go ahead. What do you say?”
“Thank you, Kiki!”
Jade smiled. “You’re welcome, munchkin.”
Mia took off, gift in hand. “Momma! Kiki brought me a present!”
Kat appeared at the end of the hall, wearing an apron with gingerbread men dancing on the front and a distrustful expression.
Jade raised a hand. “Hey.”
“Hey.”
She looked at Tyson and back to Kat. “Can you give us a minute, Ty?”
He hesitated, then turned and went in the direction Mia had gone, kissing the top of his wife’s head on the way and whispering something in her ear that Jade couldn’t say.
Jade shifted her feet as she stood in front of the door. “He’s mad at me.”
“He doesn’t like seeing me upset.”
“Neither do I. I’m so sorry about the other day, Kat. Everything got so messed up and it was my fault. I shouldn’t have made you worry like that.”
“You shouldn’t have put yourself in a dangerous situation. Any one of us would have gone with you.”
“Tyson would never let you go with me to meet Nathan.”
“No, but if it was that important that you see him, he would have gone himself. Or Jeremy. Jade … you have to be careful.”
“I was. That’s why we met in a public place and I left a note. I never meant to upset everyone. Please don’t be mad at me anymore. I can’t take it. I love you, Kat.”
She sighed. “I love you, too. If anything were to ever happen to you…”
“I promise I won’t do anything stupid like that again.” She waited for Kat to meet her gaze. “Hugs?”
“Hugs.” They crossed the distance and squeezed each other tight. “Am I ever going to know what you two talked about?”
Jade rested her head on her friend’s shoulder, not quite ready to let go. “I think you can figure the gist out. I wish I could say, but I can’t. It’s private and sad and I don’t want any more ugliness touching the holidays. Just know, I went there prepared to call the cops on him and left ninety-three percent sure he wasn’t my guy. He was trying to help me, Kat.”
She made a disbelieving sound in the back of her throat and pulled back. “I don’t think people like Nathan Lithe know how to help anyone but themselves.”
“That’s why I said trying. Everything he told me… It changes nothing and doesn’t get me any closer to finding justice.”
Letting it go for now, Kat gave her a remorseful smile. “How about some cookies? I have fresh ones coming out of the oven in about a minute.”
“This i
s why I need you in my life. Lead the way.”
Christmas was a wonderful distraction and she planned on losing herself in the excitement with her friends, rather than focusing on what she’d lost. Jeremy returned to load the gifts to take to her parents while she finished getting dressed, her mind trying very hard to push her unsettling thoughts aside for a few days.
She and Jeremy were still on shaky ground since his hypothetical ultimatum, and deep down she knew she would have told him everything to keep him in her life, but principles were involved and she was trying very hard to keep her word to Nathan. The man, after all, gave her a little more clarity on the situation if nothing else.
When they arrived at her parents’ it was typical pandemonium. Just an average day at the Shultz home. The house was lined with blue twinkle lights, and a menorah sat in the front window of the house. The hall smelled of her mother’s cooking and Elvis crooned from the stereo.
“There’s my angel!” Her father greeted as he pulled her into his arms. He turned to Jeremy and stuck out a hand. “Jake, nice to see you again.”
“Jeremy, Daddy,” Jade corrected.
“Nice to see you again, sir. Happy holidays.” Jeremy shook her father’s hand.
“Is that them?” her mother called, as she bustled out of the kitchen. “There’s my beautiful girl!”
Releasing Jade from a smothering hug, she turned and embraced Jeremy, her small body dragging him down to her stout height so she could squeeze his cheeks. “Jeremy, so glad you could join us. Larry, take their coats.” She brushed some flour off her apron. “I’ve been cooking for two days straight. Dinner should be ready in about an hour. Jeremy, why don’t you make yourself at home while Jade helps me set the table?”
“Is there anything I can do?”
“Aw, bubeleh, what manners you have. No, you sit here and relax while we get everything finished. I’ll have Jade bring you something to drink.” She bustled Jade into the kitchen. “What a nice boy. I hope you appreciate those manners. Your father has none.”
Pots bubbled over and mismatched casserole dishes lined the counters. “I appreciate him.”
“He’s a nice man.” Her mother poured a glass of iced tea from a pea green pitcher that dated back to the seventies. “Handsome too. You think he’ll marry you?”
Dear God. “Mom, don’t start. We’ve only been dating for a few months.”
She clucked her tongue. “But imagine the babies you two would make. They’d have his height and your striking features. I get verklempt just thinking about it. Don’t you want me to be alive to see my grandchildren?”
She rolled her eyes and took the glass of tea out to Jeremy, struggling not to let her mind splinter at the mention of children—or marriage, for that matter.
Jeremy sat on the couch next to her father discussing various types of—batteries?
“You know, the generic ones hold up just as well as the pricey ones, Jake. What makes no sense is the packaging. They’re batteries. Yet a light bulb comes wrapped in tissue and loose cardboard. I need to carry a Swiss army knife to open things nowadays. You own a Swiss army knife, Jake? A few weeks ago, I purchased scissors and do you know what I needed to open them? Scissors! How am I supposed to open scissors when I clearly purchased scissors because I don’t own any? Makes no sense!”
“No, sir, it doesn’t.” Jeremy winked and took the glass from her.
“That’s some dress you have on there, Jadinka. You better ask your mother for an apron so you don’t spill anything on it.”
Ah, the loony bin, we have arrived. “I will, Daddy.”
Turning back to Jeremy, her father said, “Hey Jake, did you ever wonder why we drive on parkways and park on driveways? Makes no sense!”
After dinner, the four of them shared cocktails in the living room and were entertained by her father’s explanation of the Lights and an in-depth account of ancient practices. Jeremy was wonderful. He laughed at all her father’s corny jokes, complimented her mother on her cooking, and even helped do the dishes, which nearly gave her mother a coronary.
They left around nine o’clock and Jeremy called Mia on the way home to tell her good night. It was nice the way he, Kat, and Tyson could all work together to give Mia a nice Christmas. Not many split families were so lucky.
She and Jeremy planned on exchanging gifts that night so as not to interfere with Mia’s morning. He helped her carry her bags into the house and they made some coffee—well, Jade did.
As she settled on the floor by the tree, decorated in pink Disney Princesses ornaments, she slipped off her heels and waited as he found Christmas carols on the radio. When he finally joined her on the carpet she handed him a small wrapped box.
They took turns opening one present at a time. He seemed to like all the gifts she purchased for him. He, however, had some things to learn about shopping for a girl.
“Do you like it?” he asked, grinning expectantly.
“It’s a … jar opener.”
He nodded. “Because you’re always asking me to open things for you.”
“I love it,” she pushed the words through a forced smile. Where’s the receipt? Next year he’d be going out with a list.
Next year. The thought sobered her. Would they be together next year? She hoped so.
Glancing down at her jar opener, new shoehorn, and various other odd presents, she genuinely smirked and chuckled.
“What’s so funny?”
“You. I love them. I’ll never forget our first holiday together.”
He brushed a kiss on her cheek. “There’ll be many more.”
Around midnight they headed to bed. Halfway up the stairs, he turned to her. “Can you check if I turned the coffee pot off?”
“I shut it off.”
“Can you just check?”
“Sure.”
She was right. The coffee pot was off. But while she was down there she set the timer and filter for morning so they wouldn’t have to wait or chance Jeremy getting up first and brewing a batch of sludge. On her way back up the steps, she paused. A piano solo of Silent Night played from inside the bedroom. She slowly pushed open the door and gasped.
Golden flickers danced up the wall as candles covered every surface. Smiling widely, her gaze fell on Jeremy who slowly lowered on bended knee.
Jade staggered back, her heart falling into a wild and unsteady beat. “What is this?”
A white satin box filled his hand, glimmering in the golden glow of candlelight. Her arms prickled with goose bumps as the gentle tinkling of Silent Night filled the air. “It’s for you.”
Her vision blurred, her voice shrinking behind the pressure in her throat. “You did this for me?”
“I love you, Jade. I never knew I could love someone the way I love you. No one’s ever made me feel the things you do. When I’m with you, I’m alive. And when we’re apart, I feel like every breath is my last. I want to be with you, not just now, but forever. Will you be my wife?”
He opened the box and there sat the most beautiful ring she had ever seen. It didn’t matter what the cut was or how clear the stone. She couldn’t see it through her tears anyway. All that mattered was that this man loved her enough to want her forever.
She wanted forever with him, too. Taking a shaky breath, she laughed and rasped, “Yes.”
Jeremy stood on shaky legs and pulled Jade into his arms, kissing her. “I love you,” he whispered against her lips, clumsily taking her hand and sliding the ring onto her petite finger.
Lacing her fingers with his, she pulled him close, held his face and pressed her lips to his. “I can’t believe this. You really want to marry me?”
Was she insane? “Of course I want to marry you. You mean everything to me, Jade.”
She sniffled and laughed. “I thought you seriously gave me a jar opener.”
He laughed then frowned. “Wait. You don’t like the jar opener?”
Shaking her head, she smiled. “I think I’m the luckiest girl in
the world.”
He pressed his mouth to hers, gently coaxing her lips apart. Soft piano notes swathed them in a timeless moment. His fingers gently pulled the tie of her dress until the fabric fell away.
He unwrapped her like a present, her velvety skin glimmering in the candlelight. Stepping back, he slid her dress down her arms as it puddled on the floor. A vision of exquisite beauty, the woman he loved, his future wife, the mother of his children to come.
He placed his hand over her soft belly. “Here,” he whispered, looking into her eyes. “Is where our love will grow, Jade. I want to give you everything.”
She rested her hand over his as a tear trickled past her lashes, her chin trembling as she met his stare.
Moving slowly, he pulled the thin strap of her bra down her shoulder, pausing to kiss the scar at her shoulder. His tongue gently traced the curve of her shoulder to the tip of her ear and she shivered. As he nibbled on her neck, his fingers reached between her shoulder blades and unclasped her bra, releasing her breasts.
She stood before him in nothing but a wisp of white, lace panties as his fingers unknotted his tie. She slowly unbuttoned his shirt, her eyes full of love and promise.
She pressed her lips to the center of his chest and whispered, “I love you. I might not always say or do the right things, but I know you’re right for me, Jeremy.”
Caressing the flare of her hips, he bent to kiss the side of her breast. He leisurely pulled her panties to her ankles, exposing her sex. She lifted first one foot then the other as she stepped out of the garment.
Running his fingertips up her inner thighs, a spattering of goose bumps appeared in the wake of his caress. He nudged her legs apart and gently swept his tongue over her clit as she trembled. Her head rolled back as she held his shoulders. Her long, blonde hair fell like a silk cape as he slid a finger deep into her pussy and softly stroked.
The first taste of her arousal was a promise for more. He stood, scooping her into his arms, and carried her to the bed. Her hair fanned over the middle of the mattress, an exquisite sight that stole his breath.
If I Fall Page 24