Flying was a lot of fun. Whenever Requiem wasn’t micromanaging me I sped around quickly doing didoes and aerial maneuvers. The only time that he ever left me alone is when I was ordered to gather herbs. My [Blink] practice was sorely lacking.
“Come on. You’re falling behind.” There was a giant hole that went into the ground. It had wound down for three loops or more. I didn’t have a map. Part of me felt kind of sickened being trapped in this tunnel.
“No Iamnot.” I protested.
“Really? Remember where we got jumped last time?”
“Yeah. Youalmost wet yourself.” I had no clue where we got jumped last time. Requiem so far had shown no awareness of a difference between me and the autopilot, though.
Maybe Requiem was an even better actor than I was. That was a scary thought. Dwelling on anything along those lines would be bad for my stability.
“Anyway.” Requiem didn’t refute my claims so maybe there was something to it. “We’re taking the right fork. That should get us up to the first boss.”
I tried not to roll my eyes.
We made our fourth spin down and found the fork Requiem had mentioned. I was hoping he wouldn’t ask me anything else crazy about our autopilot time. Pulling an all day shift and sleeping didn’t help keep me in the loop with everything happening.
The first monster we faced shot out of the wall and took up the entire width of our tunnel. Only the [Red Imp]’s natural survival instincts kept me from getting smacked in the face. Once I righted myself there was a very clear and rotting root in our way. Floating up revealed a small hole that I might be able to [Blink] through.
“It’s the traps. They keep screwing us.” Requiem started hacking away with his sword. “Though these are new.”
“Stupid,” I muttered.
“Really? I don’t see you detecting them any better.”
“Notthat.” I said.
“Then what?” Requiem turned and glared at me. “If you’re so smart.”
“Whywould theyput a wall?” I tried to ask a leading question. There was no way I could just hand him an easy conclusion when the [Red Imp] would give me points for implying he was stupid.
“To slow us down.”
“Untilsomething shows up.” I may have stuck my head in the sand for years, but that didn’t mean games were new to me. Plus weeks with Shazam had rather firmly taught me a lot of basics.
Requiem looked at me and then down the tunnel. I personally opted for staring at the walls. It was more likely something would crawl out of them, giant worms or termites. Hopefully, Requiem would throw a lot of fireballs at any bugs to show up.
Nope. Moles. Undead, ugly squirmy moles. Voices above what sort of macabre horror show was I trapped in?
“Imp! Drive it back!”
“Ahh!” I drove the top of my weapon towards the enemy. The [Echo of Morrigu’s Gift] landed square on its nose. There was no point in trying to identify it. I only had one trick and that was stabbing things when possible.
“Eeeee!” The medium sized undead mole grabbed its nose and cried out. Two more crawled out of the wall around us. Bits of root and dirt stuck to their faces. “Eeeee!”
“Too many!” I did my best to play poke-a-mole with the [Echo of Morrigu’s Gift]. One went down, two more showed up, and finally there were six of them appearing from the walls each throwing clumps of dirt.
“Eee!” They kept making the same noise every time. “Eee! Eeeee!”
“We’re through,” Requiem said.
“What aboutthese?!” I squeaked while stabbing another two moles in the nose.
“We need more space before we can fight them.” Requiem was somehow staying calm under pressure. “This way. There should be room up here.” He turned and threw a giant ball of fire down the hallway. It passed over me while scaring all the undead moles back into their holes.
Requiem moved swiftly down the hallway. He had one sword out trailing ash behind us. The mole creatures coughed and sputtered while slushing grossly. I tried to flap my wings, but these narrow tunnels turned my few attempts into bad hopping with mild panic.
“Another one. Help quickly.”
“Fine.” I shifted my weapon and slashed with an edge. It helped shave the second wall down before any more mole creatures caught up with us. Requiem didn’t even spare a glance for the shape-shifting item. I was lucky it was [Bound] or he might try to sell it also.
“Go. The clearing is up ahead.” Requiem turned and threw another ball of flame down the hallway. He rushed by my hopping form and dove into the cavernous opening.
“Will they come here?” I asked. There were no walls for the moles to attack from or hide in. Instead, they would be limited to the ground or way up high on the ceiling.
“No. The monster in here should scare them off.” He said.
“That’s good. Waitwhat?” I turned and looked up towards where Requiem was staring. The ceiling was extremely dark, but I had the racial [Dark Vision] backing me up. Requiem must have something similar.
I didn’t have time to think about it. The [Dark Vision] only reached so far. Requiem was scanning the top and squinting.
“There it is.” Requiem pointed up. “It chased us off last time. This time we’ll use it in our favor.”
“Is that?” One hand came up to cover my mouth.
“A giant eyeball. I’m calling him Squints.” The Traveler sounded excited.
I ran the identification skill as the creature got closer. It looked like a monster from some old fantasy game. Instead of tons of squirming eyes being attached it had veins and roots waving around. There were no wings on its back. No sign of eyelids. It was bloodshot and intensely gross.
Well. On top of that, it was staring at us. This was one gross eyeball that kept rapidly switching its gaze between the doorway, me, and Requiem. This must be how microscopic beings felt under a magnifying glass.
I wanted to retch. It squirmed even more than the icy cockroach and was way too big.
A giant ball of flame came down from above and smacked me in the face.
“Joy. Fireunder a tree. Makesperfect sense. Floating eyeball thing.” My own eyes were rolling. At least the [Maze of Midnight] had a theme. I wasn’t sure exactly what this dungeon followed, but there had to be more than earthen tones to the place. I flicked away the pop-up box and stared at Requiem. He was looking up still.
“Loot. Precious loot.” Requiem said happily. He spun one sword in his hand and waved the other back and forth.
Down came [Detached Vitreous].
Session Thirty Five – Dodging the Issue
“Go left!” Requiem yelled. I went to my left, which ended up being straight ahead. One of the little undead mole creatures popped up and I flew by stabbing at it.
Requiem tested [Detached Vitreous] with a fireball. Liquid flame splashed off but didn’t do much damage. At least the giant eye with its gross dirt didn’t regenerate.
“These things!” I dodged around clumps of dirt being fired at us. A giant eyeball was enough on its own. Adding in the undead moles and their dirt throwing was unfair.
“Stay near them.” Requiem spun with his blade and slashed at the eyeball’s feelers. “We’ll use the boss.”
“Okay!” That was not easy to do at all. Flying was still weird in many ways. Requiem’s idea of friendly fire was good, though. Being a [Red Imp] meant I would survive the fireballs but these undead moles would probably get lit up.
An unexpected burst of blue ice swirled into being. It leaped from the eyeball’s backside towards me.
“What?! Ice!” I yelled and scrambled to get out of the way. “Notjustfire!”
“Really? I didn’t notice.” The Traveler’s hair stood up as he yelled out a battle cry. Requiem charged for the eyeball creature. He was certainly doing more damage than I but the [Detached Vitreous] didn’t care.
I watched the squiggles on the eyeball’s back twist together. They convulsed and knotted then straightened at once to point i
n my direction. Green light swam up from the eyeball’s depths and shot down the root-like veins towards me.
“Its back! Theycome from there!” I said while jabbing with my pitchfork.
“I know.” His words were fairly clear despite the madness about us. The undead moles and their stupid ‘eeeeees’ were killing my ears. “I’m watching them.”
“So aimthe firemaking ones overhere!” I shouted while somersaulting over another blast of the blues.
“I’ve got to do everything around here,” Requiem grumbled while swinging the ash trailing blade creating a cloud on one side of [Detached Vitreous]. He dodged the other way and the giant eyeball tracked him. Another series of veins was facing in my direction. They did their twisty knotting thing and a ball of flame swirled into being.
“Fire! Fireisgood.” I tried to hug one of the dirt crawled undead moles. Part of me was annoyed that Requiem’s constant use of me as a grappling imp was paying off.
“Eeeehhhg..” The mole’s annoying squeal of noise died off as it was burned to a crisp.
“Fourmore!” I shouted happily. No, there were seven more. The undead moles kept popping up around us. Each new one made the same stupid noise.
“You handle them. I’ll keep the eye facing this way.” Requiem was surprisingly calm during combat.
“Okay!” I was not. It was either me as a [Red Imp] or me as an easily excited player, but everything was racing. My heartbeat pounded loudly, the [Echo of Morrigu’s Gift] stabbed into anything that moved, and undead moles were aggravating.
Two crackling roots shot out of the ground and reached for the cavern’s ceiling. A bolt of green hit one nearby and slapped into my side.
“Ahfuckme reallywhat. Thisis nonsense!” I shouted while looking around. There was a timer on the poison, but it was minutes away.
Wings over my shoulder kept distracting any attempt at situational awareness. I jabbed one end of the [Echo of Morrigu’s Gift] into a root wall and pushed off. The added momentum sent me headlong into a ball of flame to regenerate health.
Requiem hacked at the eyeball as it spun around to take in our battle scene. The Traveler took a moment to slash at the roots in the back. “Got the poison ones.”
“Leave thefiremaking ones!” I desperately shouted while dodging around few clumps of dirt. This was a mad situation and being a [Red Imp] did not provide enough health.
“I know how to play, thanks,” Requiem said while swinging at the giant eye. His attacks were on point, but the giant thing had an overabundance of health.
“Stupidhead doesn’t know eyeballs come intwos.” I muttered. Two eyeballs might be enough to do Requiem in. I did a quick calculation of all the flying objects and our little extra undead attackers. That black hole move would probably still kill everything.
“Don’t jinx us.” He said while waving another trail of ash.
I glanced up anyway. There was nothing visible but the few seconds available between projectiles was not enough to get a solid look. Hopefully, any other giant ugly eyeball was hanging around elsewhere. I hadn’t figured out exactly how boss spawns in dungeons worked. This was only my second one.
“Almost there,” Requiem muttered. The eyeball turned to stare at me while shooting streams of ice and fire at Requiem. “Just a few more.”
“More until what?” I asked. This time, it wasn’t an attempt at confounding the Traveler. I was honestly perplexed.
“Shut up. Fly upwards! As high as you can!” Requiem shouted.
“Why?”
“Not now, you stupid imp! Just follow orders!” Now Requiem was worked up. Seeing him agitated made me smile.
“Eeeeee!” The moles kept screaming their constant noises. Part of me longed for the days of video games on a computer screen. Something where their annoying sounds could be turned off.
I started flying up towards the ceiling. Requiem bravely, or foolishly, stayed where he was swinging at the [Detached Vitreous]. Most of the small mole things were dead and another two roots had popped up in the cavern. The young player was using the obstacles to hide behind which caused them to take damage. I could see health bars as I turned to look down below.
That also made me realize exactly how high up I had flown. I gulped for a moment and the world spun with vertigo. Below me, the giant eyeball grew closer. The veins on its back wiggled and spurted blood. Requiem could be seen smiling. He seemed to be lobbing small blades into the creature’s back.
One giant tear crossed the eyeball’s front. It seemed to be swaying in the air as it climbed up towards my much smaller frame. I turned back towards the ceiling and put more distance between us.
“To your left!” Requiem shouted up at me. The eyeball turned abruptly midair and gazed at the Traveler. Fireballs spun out of the creature’s back in my direction which I happily caught. Free health was always nice.
The Traveler below threw up another wall of ash and vanished. [Detached Vitreous] swiveled back around to me. My tail was twisting back and forth with nearly the same ferocity as the giant eyeball’s veins.
“Comeonstupid stupidno brain!” I shouted. Requiem’s order had steered me close to the ceiling’s surface a few hundred feet above the floor.
The eyeball hesitated as the ceiling grew closer. It seemed to be blinded by the giant gash that Requiem inflicted. I kept up my stream of insults to give the monster something to focus on.
From below a long stream of fireballs came up. The heat of them was far beyond Requiem’s normal intensity. Portions of the monster’s health bar chipped away, but it still had a lot left. Smoke billowed out from behind the eyeball and filled the cavern’s roof.
Part of me wondered exactly how the thing was flying to begin with. At least I had wings. They clearly didn’t care one whit for the laws of physics.
“Drop it!” Requiem shouted, his sword tip was being used to point at something nearby. “Drop it quickly!”
I turned and tried to find what he was talking about. My vision wasn’t hampered by the smoke at all, which was strange to me. There was a small box floating off to one side talking about [Red Imp]s and [Dark Vision] alterations due to living in volcano filled plains. I didn’t have time to read much.
“Okay!” I bumped my head on the ceiling and did a swift lap around the giant stalagmite that Requiem had pointed to. There was a clear crack in one side.
I focused for a moment and shifted the [Echo of Morrigu’s Gift] into spear form and hoped it wouldn’t be damaged forever. My tiny arms and wings fluttered and yanked the weapon back and forth trying to dislodge the spike.
“Over here, you big fugly rotting eyeball!” Requiem shouted. I glanced down to see that most of the ash and smoke had cleared. The Traveler was trying to get [Detached Vitreous] to turn away from me.
I wiggled the weapon even harder and gasped in happiness when the cracking started. A few more yanks on the weapon’s hilt succeeded in releasing the giant stalactite from the ceiling. Part of me felt absolutely giddy as the giant eyeball spun around. The [Detached Vitreous] looked at me, then to the falling spike, and back to me. If there had been eyelids or a face the expression would have been one of shock.
Instead, there was a squish of noise as the spike entered one side and the orb popped. Bits of entrails flew everywhere. The [Detached Vitreous] seemed to be struggling to stay afloat despite clearly being dead. The effect was a body that lowered to the ground slowly.
There was one item amid the chaos of gooey eyeball guts that caught my attention. Time seemed to compress and with every fraction of a second the synchronization meter jumped up. Messages of [Greed], [Greed], [Greed] flashed wildly. I took it as a sign from the Voices and dove for the loot.
“Mine! Dibs dibsdibs.” I shouted and flew with all my speed to the falling body. A few weak fireballs and icy blasts splattered towards the ground, but none impeded me. Both chubby arms shot out and grabbed for the item. I got something in my hands and a message box popped up.
Whatever it was fit
into one palm. The [Echo of Morrigu’s Gift] had somehow transformed into a tiny pitchfork and was being held by my tail. I slapped both hands over my chest and held on while tumbling. The shift in weight from gravity taking over sent me falling even faster. Both wings were frantically beating while I, the remains of [Detached Vitreous], and a giant portion of the ceiling landed with thuds.
I was cackling happily. That one item grab had sent my completion percentage up by four percent. Being [Greedy] had paid off. At least it seemed to pay off until Requiem approached.
“What’s that?” He stabbed down one of his swords right next to my tiny body. I flinched and tried to roll away. A heavy foot stomped onto my tail and prevented escape. “I asked you a question, Imp.”
“It’s mine!” I shouted. “Not yours, giantstupiddummy.”
“Everything you own is mine unless I say otherwise.” Requiem cleaned off his other sword slowly. There was a gleam in his eyes that made my teeth chatter.
By rolling a little, it was obvious that everything down here was dead. Roots that had shot into the air now looked wilted or charred. Tiny undead moles were in shambles all over the floor. Pools of green, blue, and red could clearly be seen dotting the landscape.
“Oh, it’s safe. I’ve made sure it’s just you and me in this room.” Requiem said while leaning over me. The smile on his face was utterly false.
I nodded and tried to focus on jerking the tail away from him. The game made it twist and turn, but there was no escape. He looked especially cruel when it was apparent that half the dead monster’s guts were hanging all over his body. The second foot near my face must have landed in some mole’s head.
“So what did you get?” Requiem said.
“Noneya, twerp,” I muttered. He quickly slapped me across the face and I saw my percentage bar go up a bit more. Messages of both [Defiant] and [Self-Serving] popped up.
“Try again. The truth this time.” He seemed bored with this whole process of beating me. It certainly never got him results.
“I don’t want to tell you,” I answered. That was a completely true statement.
Another slap in the face rewarded me with pain.
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