“Ms. Walsh, Mr. Sterling is ready to see you now, please follow me.”
I grabbed my purse and trailed her to a surprisingly nondescript set of doors. The paint was grey and there was nothing indicating that it might belong to a powerful executive. But once the doors swung open … I saw that the plain exterior was just a ruse.
The office inside was three times the size of my entire apartment. There were gadgets everywhere, plus an entire wall devoted to cabinets, the niches filled with knickknacks and multitudes of awards. But before I could get a closer look, Jake strode forward, his giant form intimidating, his blue eyes sweeping over me, not missing a detail.
“Thank you, Mary Beth, please bring some coffee for our guest,” he rumbled.
“No coffee, just water, thanks,” I interjected quickly. My quick response surprised the man.
“Can we offer you something else? Soda? Tea?” he asked, one eyebrow quirked.
“No thanks,” I replied faintly. Pregnant women can’t drink caffeine and I guess this was the perfect opening but somehow I couldn’t say anything. Instead, I waited until the receptionist left to turn back to the massive man, his big form now leaning casually against his desk.
“So Tina,” he said smoothly. “Here we are again.”
“Um yeah,” I mumbled, looking at the ground. Girl, this isn’t going to work, I reprimanded myself. Forcing my head back up, I met his eyes mischievously. “So were you able to handle those women coming into the bathroom at the restaurant?”
Something indescribable flashed through his eyes. “Was that your idea of a joke?” he rumbled. “Leaving me half-naked, not to mention in a compromising position, in the ladies’ room?”
“I knew you could take care of yourself,” I said breezily. “A guy like you knows women inside out, I’m sure you could handle yourself around a bunch of dowagers.” The women I’d passed coming out of the bathroom had been at least seventy, exactly the type to faint at the sight of a naked man.
“In fact, those dowagers, as you call them, are most appreciative of the nude male form,” Jake replied with a lascivious grin. “They’ve seen a lot and you’d be surprised at how difficult it is to startle the elderly.”
Hmm, I guess he had a point. I hadn’t heard a kerfuffle of screams upon my departure, and Jake had shown up intact minutes later, perfectly dressed, with no sign that he’d been naked doing the dirty just minutes ago. But then again, he was a master with women, right? I’d forgotten my opponent and mentally shook myself.
“So what was it you were here to talk about?” he said silkily, not moving from his desk. His long legs were crossed, seemingly relaxed, but something about his tone put me on alert. He had a brain like a steel trap, and I had to remind myself that this man was danger … someone whose savvy and intellect had launched him to the forefront of the business world.
“Umm, well, I just wanted to see how things were …” I trailed off. “And to get a look at your company,” I fibbed. “I haven’t had time to research Sterling, and I thought I’d take a look for myself at the mighty pharma outfit that’s ruling the markets.”
I could tell he didn’t believe me at all, but instead of probing, Jake went along with it. With a wry smile he said, “Well, let me show you some of the awards we’ve received,” he murmured again, long strides taking him over to the wall unit. The thing was massive, reaching all the way up to the fifteen foot ceiling, running the entire length of the room, divided into multiple niches and cabinets.
“Here, we have our award for best new HIV drug of the decade,” he said smoothly, picking up a small, clear plastic toy with Sterling’s logo embedded inside. “And here’s an award from JAMA for a breakthrough in diabetes treatment,” he continued. “I believe your grandmother uses it. Funny you haven’t heard of us before.”
But before I could get off a retort, the door opened and Mary Beth came in again.
“Your water,” she said, placing the glass on a coffee table. “And Mr. Sterling, there’s a package for you outside.”
“Can’t you sign for it?” he asked with an exasperated frown.
“Normally, yes,” said Mary Beth. “But you know how that new delivery service is. If it’s your name on the label, they won’t let me sign even though they’ve been here fifteen times in the past.”
“Dammit,” Jake shook his head in disgust. “These new start-ups … still fine-tuning their customer service. I’ll be back,” he said with a glance at me, and strode out of the office.
The door closed, leaving me in the cavernous space. I sipped the water and decided to take a closer look at some of these awards. There were so many, like little plastic tombstones five inches high. Most were clear with the company logo and some words etched inside, an announcement of Sterling’s latest achievement.
One tombstone caught my eye in particular. I scrutinized it and saw that it was for Sterling’s savvy marketing of the drug Pernacular. Hmm, my forehead furrowed. Where had I heard that name before? I’d been so busy with my own personal turmoil that I hadn’t been following the news recently.
All of a sudden, it dawned on me where I’d heard the name. In my legal ethics class. A company had purchased the rights to a drug which patent had expired long ago. Their business strategy was to act as a monopolist and jack up the price overnight. As a result, Pernacular had risen in price by 5,500% -- from approximately $13.50 per pill to almost $700.
The effects had been devastating. The drug was intended for pregnant women suffering from a parasitic infection. A rare occurrence, yes, but the drug was the only treatment which could guarantee the safety of the mother and her unborn child. And no one else would produce a competing drug because the market was just too limited, only five hundred women were affected each year, a number too small to incentivize competitors to action.
So Sterling had ruthlessly exploited the opportunity. As a single-source generic, Pernacular had patients in its grip with no alternatives, few resources, and only inferior, second-tier fallbacks. Worst of all, Sterling’s actions were perfectly legal. There was nothing that we could do as aspiring lawyers to combat this cold-blooded business decision.
I stood back, aghast. The father of my child was a tyrant? A man so hardened, so ruthless that he was indifferent to the plight of pregnant women? And not just that. Sterling had a bevy of successful drugs. Surely they could have carried off a successful IPO without making women and children suffer.
But a rush of understanding came over me. I’d been dumb again. I’d had my head in the sand like an ostrich pretending enemies didn’t exist, and Jake was a grade A predator, ruthlessly exploiting the weak, pressing every advantage that came his way. The signs had always been there, the question was why hadn’t I realized it earlier? Jake was a CEO, and people in top positions often have a merciless side to them, willing to stab their own mother if needed.
Bile rose in my throat, the bitter flavor choking me, the burning in my heart impossible to ignore. I couldn’t go forward with my plan to reveal the pregnancy. I couldn’t bring up a child with the “Bad Boy of Wall Street,” given the choices he’d made with respect to Pernacular. Yes, I appreciate what money can do, but the collateral damage was just too high. Women and children need to be helped, not harmed through the grinding of the capitalist machine.
I jerked as the door banged open and Jake strode in, jolting me from my thoughts. My emotions were swirling, confusion and distress clouding my mind, making me feel faint. But his long legs covered the space between us in mere seconds.
“God,” he muttered. “The incompetence of some of these new companies,” he said before sweeping me into his arms.
But I shrank away from him. The heat radiating from his body was intense and I was so tempted to throw my arms around him, to bury myself against his chest and forget what I’d seen, savoring the feel of his arms. But I resisted. There could be no peace, not with this man who had chosen to hurt nameless others. Instead, I held myself as stiff as a board and dodged his
lips, that hot flesh branding me on every inch of skin it touched.
“No, Jake, I can’t,” I cried, craning my neck backwards. His arms were like steel bands around me and I was pinned in place, unable to move an inch, my breasts pressed against his massive chest. An unmistakable hardness had begun to rise against my thigh, his hips grinding in small circles against my softness.
“No Jake,” I said more forcefully, struggling against his muscular body, trying to free myself. “I can’t, I can’t,” I pleaded.
“Why?” he growled into my throat. “It’s not like I haven’t seen this show before,” he muttered, finally capturing my lips with his.
The kiss was searing. It was so good that I almost gave in right there, throwing caution to the wind, letting my inhibitions go. His tongue tracing the seam of my lips, covering mine in sweet, hot release, was so compelling that it reminded me why this man was CEO – because he was used to getting his way. And that included business dealings, where difficult, ruthless decisions were made every day.
“I can’t Jake,” I said, finally succeeding in freeing myself, his arms dropping to his sides, a bewildered look on his face. “I can’t,” I said with finality.
“Is it because of your sister?” he asked, giving me a sharp glance, his arms crossed over his muscular chest. “Because I’ve already decided to take care of that. Jenna isn’t worth anything, and I’m breaking it off tonight,” he said dismissively.
“Yes, yes, it’s Jenna,” I said hurriedly, my cheeks flushing, my tone rushed as I desperately clung to the most obvious excuse. “Even if you break up with my sister, I just can’t go through with this,” I said.
“Why not?” he asked forcefully. “Yeah, things have moved fast, but who cares? If I transition from Jenna to you, it doesn’t matter. No one would dare say a thing, and it’s not like we’d have to go public immediately. We could keep our little romance in the background until the time comes.”
That stopped me short. He was willing to break off an engagement for a “little romance”? What the fuck? Suddenly, I was so angry I could barely see straight, the ground physically tilting in front of me until I steadied myself on the back of a chair. Clearly, I had misjudged this man. I’d thought he was the answer for my prayers after years spent celibate, a man who was an emotional, physical and intellectual match for me, but I was wrong. He was a heartless bastard, one who prioritized money and success over everything, and his dalliances with women were clearly insignificant.
“I’m sorry Jake,” I said coldly. “I’ve just realized this isn’t right for me, and it’s not right for you either. Our “little romance,” as you call it, never got off the ground. I can’t tell you what to do with your engagement but I can’t be a part of this three-way twisted love triangle either. And for your information Jenna doesn’t suspect a thing, I haven’t breathed a word to her.”
The storm clouds on his brows were ominous and frightful, but I forced myself to ignore them. However much my heart and body yearned towards him, I couldn’t come clean to a man recently dubbed “Most-Hated Man in the U.S.” by Time Magazine. There was no amount of money, no amount of physical attraction, that could persuade me to cross that line.
“I’m so sorry for taking up your time,” I said stiffly. And turning on my heel, I made my way out of his office.
CHAPTER TEN
Jake
What the fuck had just happened? I’d figured Tina was coming to Sterling for a fresh start. The illicit, but one hundred percent satisfying tryst we’d had in the restroom had cemented my view that she was the perfect girl for me. The way her hips swayed, the way she sashayed off, leaving me to be discovered by a gaggle of old ladies … I loved it, loved her sassiness, her clear intelligence, her bold attitude.
So when Tina had called for an appointment, I told my secretary to clear my schedule for a few hours in anticipation of some serious conversation. Not that I expected it to be painful, just that major items needed to be addressed … namely my engagement to her sister.
Jenna. The name still made me shudder. I was so over her, so over the bony blonde that I could barely even bring myself to think about her. But getting rid of her was going to be a huge relief, and grimly I looked forward to breaking off our engagement.
Because that was the clear path forward. Sure, I’ve been known to engage in threesomes before, every rich playboy in the Valley does it, but Tina was worth way more than that. She was far more than a fling, and I was willing to break off a very public engagement in order to explore a relationship with the curvy brunette. Asking her to engage in a threesome? Not only would I be slapped to the ground, but it didn’t honor what I thought of this beautiful girl, the one with a mind as sharp as a blade complete with a playful, teasing personality.
But what the fuck had just happened? She’d shown up looking delicious enough to eat, her curvy form skimmed by a brown dress, her slim legs shown off to their best form in a pair of pumps. And she’d thrown me a dazzling smile upon her arrival, I was ready to jump her on a moment’s notice. We would have made good use of the couch in my office, or maybe the rug, who knows so long as we were horizontal.
But I disappeared for a few minutes on some stupid errand and she was completely different when I returned. Nervous, balky, recalcitrant … and utterly firm in rejecting my advances.
I’ve been rejected before but only by women who are lesbians. Even the married ones find me irresistible, doing the down and dirty as soon as I get my game on. But Tina? She was so adamant, her pretty face determined, her movements sure and firm as she pushed away from me. It wasn’t the “oh help me” struggle of a damsel in distress who actually wants to be ravished. It was the “let me go NOW” struggle of a woman determined to make an exit.
So I let her go, figuring I’d save myself some scratches and dings. But it was odd … even when I mentioned I was planning on breaking up with Jenna, she just shook her head, saying that “this was all too complicated” and “Jenna is my sister” and all that bullshit. Okay, maybe not total bullshit, but nothing that time wouldn’t cure. Fuck, it wasn’t like I was married to Jenna. It was just dating, and only a few months at that. Worse things had happened in the world.
Silently, I cursed at myself. What the fuck was going on? Had my inability to actively reject Jenna gotten me into this mess? Had I been too passive, allowing myself to be led along like a fucking mule? I cursed silently again. Normally a go-getter, I’d let myself be seduced by a pretty face and lithe body. Now it was too late, and I was fucking stuck with a witch … while the girl of my dreams disappeared into the horizon.
CHAPTER ELEVEN
Tina
Six months later …
My baby mewled in my arms. Janie was beautiful, just the tiniest thing, crying a bit as I rocked her. Normally crying is a good sign because it shows that a baby has strong, healthy lungs and isn’t afraid to communicate her distress, sending adults scurrying to do her bidding. But with my daughter, things are different. Janie was born prematurely and she’s tiny for her age. Her crying was weak, her mewls pitiful. She doesn’t eat much, nor does she have the “rooting” instinct of newborns, the one that causes them to seek their mother’s breast for nutritious, life-giving milk.
I’d been trying to tempt her with formula instead, mixing different types, even adding Baby Ensure to get her the calories needed to thrive. But something was wrong, I could feel it even though we were just back from the hospital. Janie was growing weaker by the minute and my best efforts to nurse weren’t enough. We needed to go back
I burst into the Emergency Room, Janie in my arms.
“Please,” I gasped. “I need to see a pediatrician immediately. My baby won’t eat and she’s listless and limp.”
“She looks alright to me,” said the nurse with the briefest glance at the bundle in my arms. “There’s movement and she’s breathing. Put your name on the list, we’ll call when the pediatrician’s available,” she said, turning away.
Hot tears st
reamed down my cheeks as I scribbled my name in shaky script. My panting and gasping was audible to everyone in the waiting room and not a few people looked at me with pity, a single woman with a tiny bundle in my arms, desperate for help. Janie’s blanket was literally damp from my tears, and I grew more panicked by the second as my baby grew weaker, draining of life.
Finally my name was called. “Tina Walsh,” harrumphed an old lady. I followed the pink scrubs to a waiting room where a pediatrician waited, exhaustion lining her face.
“And what have we here?” she said, reaching for Janie.
But the minute she looked at my child, her expression changed from one of tiredness to alert urgency.
“We need to get this baby hydrated now,” she said to the nurse. “NOW!”
“She won’t drink,” I sobbed quietly. “I’ve tried everything to get her to drink my breast milk, formula, anything, but she just won’t suckle.”
“Ma’am, we’re going to push an IV on your daughter so that she gets the fluids she needs,” said the doctor. “Drinking fluids orally isn’t enough, we need to administer it directly to her bloodstream.”
I sat down limply.
“But she’s just a baby,” I said woodenly. “What’s wrong with her? Why is this happening? We only left the hospital a few days ago, she’s a newborn,” I whispered hoarsely.
“Ma’am, we don’t know but we’re going to find out,” the doctor said firmly. “She’ll be in the NICU for observation. In the meantime, if you could please wait in the waiting room, we’ll call you as soon as we have a diagnosis.”
I walked like a zombie into the hallway, utterly miserable. The fluorescent lights were bright, making it seem like artificial daytime although it was night. The waiting room was hushed, filled with people hacking and bleeding, looking worse for the wear. I didn’t want to be there. Everyone here was sick or dying, and I didn’t want to acknowledge that I was a part of this desperate scene too, the mother of a seriously ill child.
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