Connor turned his back to us.
"Skinny-dipping in the loch is a badge of honor," Sam whispered. "The men all do it. It can be a bit embarrassing when they come out. Shrinkage." She was still grinning. "Wait until Connor drops his kilt. And then look impressed and maybe a bit awed. It will look good for the camera. So many women want to be in our shoes right now. Connor has an impressive physique. It's not hard to drool over it."
I wasn't so sure this was funny after all…
"Hypothermia can set in very quickly in water that cold," I said, popping into physician mode. "Water steals body heat twenty to twenty-five times quicker than air. Adding to the danger, you can't tell if a person is shivering in the water. Hypothermia causes confusion and memory loss. Shallow breathing. A person could drown before they even realize they're in trouble."
"No one will let that happen, Blair. The men won't be in the water that long. Once their packages start to shrink, they generally pop out pretty quickly." Her amused expression was just too comical.
Just at that moment, Connor unfastened his kilt. It dropped around his feet.
"Damn," I said. "He really does have fine glutes."
"Yeah, they're even better viewed right side up like this, aren't they?" Sam said. "Want to wager on whether Austin will join him?"
I didn't have time to place my bet. Austin dropped his kilt, revealing an equally beautiful butt. The two men took off at a run to the lake, yelling like Scottish warriors in the heat of battle.
They were beautiful creatures, moving sleekly and sinuously as they splashed bravely into the water.
"Fuck, this water is cold," Austin yelled as he charged in.
"You have that right, mate." Connor continued the charge. "It's good for the constitution."
From a purely anatomical view, watching the way their muscles flexed was poetry to a student of the body. They each had fine muscle definition. I wouldn't have minded studying subjects like these in anatomy classes. From the point of view of a hetero woman, my toes curled. Tonight, the sex was going to be very good.
I turned to Sam. "Should they be straining their voices like that?"
Sam rolled her eyes. "Men will be men. Come on. Now's the time." She parted the bushes. "Well done, men! Well done indeed!"
I followed close behind her.
She took the beach, clapping and whistling. She was the kind of whistler who put her fingers in her mouth and made a sound that would carry all the way back to Inverness. Very startling coming from someone with her aura of class and breeding.
Austin looked over his shoulder at us. His eyes went wide.
I waved cheerily at him and catcalled. Unfortunately, my whistling wasn't as loud or dramatic as Sam's.
Connor looked over his shoulder at us too, and waved happily to us before returning his focus to the loch. When he was almost hip-deep, he pointed his arms in front of him and dove in. He reappeared about ten feet out, popping above water with his red curls plastered to his head. He shook his head, sending water droplets flying in the sunlight. "The ledge drops off just a few feet in front of you, Austin. Dive in or fall in, mate."
Austin hesitated.
Sam cupped her hands around her mouth. "Is that the Loch Ness Monster I see?" She gestured to the cameraman and pointed to the guys. "Get that on camera."
Austin looked around, looking for the monster. I couldn't tell whether he was ready to swim for shore or not.
But Connor laughed and pointed to Austin. "Ach. I think Nessie's a wee bit bigger than six inches and shrinking, lass. You need yer eyes checked?"
Austin realized he'd been had and dove in. "Only six inches? You need your eyes checked, buddy." He resurfaced next to Connor. "Wow!" He shook the water out of his hair. "Brisk."
"There's a wee understatement." Connor trod water easily. "Keep moving."
"Nessie must be a cold-blooded beast to live in this loch," Austin said.
"And a sly, shy one, that one," Connor said loud enough for us to hear.
Sam and I hurried to the edge of the water, holding our skirts up to keep them dry.
Sam paused in front of the pile that was their kilts and spoke in an intentionally loud voice. "Should we take their kilts and hold them hostage?"
Connor laughed. "Not unless you want to be traumatized by what a wee bit of cold water will do to a well-hung man's family jewels, Sam, my darling. It's not a sight fit for a lady."
"Who says I'm a lady?" She shook the kilt like she was flagging a bull.
"Think of poor Blair if ye won't think of yourself, lass." Connor was clearly enjoying himself. And it was fun to see the rapport the two of them had.
"Blair's a doctor." Sam shrugged and began folding the kilt as if she was going to pack it away. "She's seen it all, and worse, before, I imagine. Haven't you, Blair?"
Laughing, I held my hands up. "True enough. I've worked the emergency room. I've seen plenty."
"Aye, then. It's no concern of mine." Connor flipped over and began backstroking.
"Thar she blows!" Sam cracked up and bent over laughing.
I made a show of covering my eyes.
Sam pried them away. "You have to look. For clinical purposes. To see what a ball-less man really looks like in the wild."
"Well, man," Connor said to Austin. "Are ye going to show that bride-to-be of yours what you'd look like as a eunuch or not? She'll appreciate your manliness all the more knowing she almost lost it."
With that, Austin flipped onto his back and floated lazily for a second. Then, before anyone could get any kind of a real look, or the camera could focus on him, he flipped onto his stomach and crawl-stroked farther out.
The two of them splashed around in the loch, showing us their bums.
"Is that the moon I see reflected in the water?" Sam called out to them.
Both guys stuck their butts out of the water.
"I think they're mooning us," I said.
Sam and I broke into laughter.
Angus quietly watched the fun, tolerating it as the rest of the crew joined us on the beach. Angus let them splash around for just a few minutes before he called them back in and pulled a pile of thick, lush towels out of a bag.
I took half the stack from him and waited for Austin with the towels and his kilt, though I wasn't sure how I was going to be much help with the kilt. Costume would have to help with that. It required a lot of careful hand-pleating and then lying down on and wrapping around. It was a tricky, and lengthy, process.
I carefully shielded Austin from camera view, keeping my eyes above waist level as he walked to me. Yes, I was the preserver of his modesty. And jealously so. I didn't particularly relish the thought of everyone seeing his full frontal, and certainly not like that. I wasn't embarrassed, or "miss-ish" as they might have said in days past. But I wasn't keen on seeing Austin without his balls and embarrassing him.
I wrapped Austin around the waist in one towel, tucking the ends in and giving him a nice towel skirt. I draped a second towel over his shoulders and handed him a third to towel off his hair. As I did, I studied Austin with a professional eye. His lips were blue. Very blue. But that wasn't completely unusual. He was fair and prone to blue lips when he got cold. He was shivering nicely. A good sign. As long as he shivered, he was in no danger of suffering from hypothermia. I shot a glance at Connor, who was also blue-lipped, though less so, and shivering too.
Connor winked at me. "Playing doctor, aye?"
I laughed at the double entendre. "Very perceptive! It is my job."
Austin took my chin and pulled my gaze around to him. "Eyes back on your imitation Jamie." His hand was cold.
"I wouldn't say there's anything imitation about you at all." I pulled him into my arms, wrapped them around him, and kissed his cold lips, running my tongue over them to warm them up. "Your lips are so cold I was almost afraid my tongue was going to stick to them," I whispered to him, pressing him against me to share my body heat.
"That water is damn cold. I can't sto
p shivering."
"Shivering's good," I said, shooting a quick glance at Connor. "That's what I was looking for. It means you'll live and keep your life and memory."
"Was I in any danger of losing my memory?" Austin said.
"Yes, as matter of fact. Memory loss is a side effect of hypothermia," I said, keeping my tone light.
Austin furrowed his brow comically. His eyes twinkled. "If I'd known that, I wouldn't have risked it. Memory loss is a devastating thing."
I laughed. "You're telling me."
After the men were dried and dressed, we returned to camp for lunch, which was served buffet-style at the outdoor tables. Flora greeted us and sat with us as we ate on a blanket on the ground in a sunny spot. Austin was still warming up after his swim, but at least his lips were less blue. That would teach him to swim in frigid water. On second thought, no, it wouldn't. I had no doubt he'd do it again, given a chance.
"You're not going to like this," Flora said casually, but there was a note of alarm in her voice. "You have another enemy. Or maybe detractor is a fairer way of stating things." Flora handed Austin her phone. "See? Here it is."
I read over Austin's shoulder. It was a post on one of Jamie's fan pages. From Tish, that female colleague of Austin's, the young, pretty one, complaining about what a horrible player Austin was. He'd led her on. Flirted with her at work. Made excuses to work late with her and forced her to work long hours with him. Let the air out of her tires, so he she'd be stranded with him alone at the office and be a hero by changing her flat.
This thing with Blair Edwards? This fairytale romance? A sham. A complete hoax for PR purposes only. Austin was a douche of epic proportions.
The rant went on and on. I couldn't read the rest. My blood was at the boiling point.
Austin scowled. "The damned little liar." A muscle in his jaw ticked, a sure sign of anger.
Flora shook her head. "We deleted it, of course. And banned her from the page."
"But this isn't the only place she's posted," Austin said.
"No," Flora said. "We're deleting them as fast as we find them. The company that handles our social media management is very good—thorough and fast. But there's nothing we can do about the posts to her own social media profiles." She paused. "She's a woman scorned. And not easy to shut down. She clearly has some techie expertise."
"That she does." Austin scowled. "She's twisted everything. Those flat tires? She called me out to fix them. At the time, I suspected she let the air our herself."
"Oh, I don't doubt it," Flora said. "It's the way of a person like her."
I leaned my head on Austin's shoulder as he handed the phone back to Flora. "The bitch."
Flora shook her head. "Don't let it worry you. You'll quickly find a lot of this in this business. As soon as you get a tiny bit of fame, everyone wants their piece of it. And will tell any story, sell any story, to get it."
Still, it lingered on my mind. Just then, a drone flew by and hovered over us. I jumped.
Flora looked up at it, put a hand over her eyes, and squinted . "Don't worry about that one. It's one of ours. They're a very convenient way to get some nice aerial shots. Even of the crew relaxing and having a picnic." She laughed.
I was still ill at ease.
Flora pointed to it. "See the logo of our film team? That's how you can tell. We make the logo very obvious for a reason. We've had problems with people trying to fly drones and film while we're shooting. Paparazzi and fans. And people who get a thrill out of sneaking into secure sites.
"It's verra dangerous, really. You're not supposed to fly drones without permits and notifying local airports. But people do, unfortunately. Especially out here in the woods, they think they can get away with it."
"Were you using them earlier?" I asked. "When the guys were doing yoga on the beach and Sam and I were in the bushes watching?"
Flora looked upward. "I don't know for certain. It's possible."
"You aren't going to release the nudie pictures of Austin, are you? We didn't sign a contract allowing that?" I nudged Austin.
Flora smiled. "Certainly not. That was all just fun. If you give us permission, of course, we'd take it. We'll edit out the naughty bits. Or use one of those blurry bars to protect your privacy."
I was mildly reassured. But I had heard something in the woods. "I'm sure the paparazzi would love to get shots of Connor naked on the beach."
"Oh, they would. No doubt," Flora said. "But we won't let them."
After lunch, we went back to work, watching the show film for part of the day, and learning some lines for another promo piece the rest. It was late when we were driven back to our hotel in Inverness. We were up again early the next morning for another day on site.
We spent another three days in the same way with roughly the same schedule. Except that on the second day, and all the others, Sam and I joined the morning yoga session. But I refused to swim naked in the loch. At the end of our days filming, I was exhausted.
Don't ever let anyone tell you actors don't work hard. The days were long and grueling in a different way from being a doctor. Taxing physically. In contrast to what I'd imagined, there were no happy, raucous evenings drinking whisky and sharing tall tales. This was work. But we did build a strong camaraderie with the cast and crew. So close that I wished we could have invited more of them to the wedding than just Sam and Connor, and, of course, Flora and those who would be working.
But I was also excited and comfortable with who would be filming our wedding. It really was going to be something memorable.
All through the days at the loch, I continued to have that feeling of being watched. And not by Nessie, whom we never got a glimpse of. Every time I heard a buzzing sound, even it if turned out to be a bee—we did stumble on an old tree with a honeybee nest in it one day—or the whirr of a boat motor on the loch, or piece of equipment, I looked around for a drone.
When I mentioned my feeling to Austin after the first day, he surprised me by not discounting my gut feeling. He didn't brush my concerns off like the others did. And he didn't fall back on platitudes, saying security was taking care of things.
He scowled. "Be careful, Blair. And let me know if you catch sight of anyone. Or anything suspicious. After that attack by Nigel in Glasgow, I don't trust anyone or anything."
"Nigel was never a serious threat. Not really. And he's been defused." I paused. "Anything? Are you worried about a drone, too?"
He nodded. "Or a hidden camera."
I frowned. "You're worried about someone, aren't you? Someone specific. Randy?" I studied Austin to see if his expression would give him away.
His serious look scared me. "I'm always worried. All that troll crap Tish posted? It's not exactly like her. If I had to guess, Randy was somehow behind it."
Austin pulled me into a hug and rested his chin on the top of my head. "I've been in Internet security long enough to know there are always threats. And always ways for a determined entity to get around security. If you feel like we're being watched, I believe you. Keep your guard up, Blair. And I'll keep mine. I'll protect you with my life. I promise you that."
Chapter 12
Blair
The day after we finished our promo shoot, Flora called us just as Austin and I were about to head out for our first carefree day of sightseeing. Except for the wedding, our commitments to the show were all fulfilled. She called Austin's phone rather than mine. He answered more regularly and reliably than I did when I wasn't on call. He put her on speakerphone.
"Are you both there? Excellent! Good news!" Flora said in a rush. "My friend in the registrar's office in Gretna Green just called. As I promised, I lit a fire under her and she put your application on the fast track. Top priority. Especially after I explained the reason for the rush. She's a big Jamie fan. Anything she can do to help." Flora took a quick breath. "Your application has been approved and finalized. You're free to marry anytime you like! Isn't that fabulous?"
My mouth must h
ave fallen open.
Austin laughed and immediately gave an exaggerated look of mock concern. "Having second thoughts now that marrying me is imminent?"
I kissed him quickly. "Never."
"Austin? Blair?" Flora said. "What's going on?"
"We're here," I said. "And overwhelmed and in awe of your connections. Thank you."
"Well, thanks aren't necessary. Just doing my job. We need you married so we can flash that wedding promo around before the season starts. And put all these nasty rumors that your relationship is a hoax to bed for good."
I looked at Austin. "Yes, but how are you going to spare the cast and crew?"
"Well…" There was a sly note in her voice. "That's the other reason I'm calling. Due to some logistical problems on our end, we have a gap in our filming schedule this weekend. Fancy a Saturday wedding? Saturday is traditional for weddings in the States, isn't it?"
"Uh." I was too stunned to speak, and glanced at my watch reflexively. Too bad it wasn't the kind of watch that showed the day and date. I had completely lost track of time.
Austin nudged me. "It's Tuesday."
"Four days?" My eyes went wide. "You want us to get a wedding together in four days, counting today?"
"You don't have to worry about a thing," Flora reassured us. "I have connections. I can pull this off. I'm used to pulling rabbits out of hats. It's my job."
"But Beth and Malcolm. My dress? And Lazer and Ashley flying over? And the guys and their whisky distillery tour plans? They're not even halfway through. Can they stand for them to be cut short?"
"I already put a call in to Malcolm," Flora said. "He grumbled a bit. But that's what he does. It's always his first reaction. He came around quickly. He pointed out that if he could outfit an entire Scottish army almost overnight, he could finish one damn wedding dress in four days. Those are almost his exact words.
"Though he complained that wedding dresses are a wee bit more trouble than soldiers' uniforms. So don't ye worry about that. Malcolm never makes a promise he can't deliver on. Soooo…what do you think?"
Simply Austin (The Jet City Kilt Series) (Volume 4) Page 12