Though the women all wore the same shade of red, the style of each dress was different. Once all the bridesmaids were at the front, two young boys who looked a lot like Than came down the aisle wearing tuxes like the groomsmen. One carried a pillow and the other a Bible. Adrianne had to admit that they were absolutely adorable, as were the two flower girls who followed after them. Dressed in soft pink, they took their job of spreading rose petals very seriously. They also looked like Than, and she wondered if the four of them were his nieces and nephews.
The music changed again, and this time, when the doors opened, Lindsay appeared. Since her father had passed away several years ago, it was her brother, Lucas, who stood by her side. Given the devotion to a rather traditional and formal sort of wedding, Adrianne had been half expecting to see Lindsay standing in the doorway with a large ballroom style gown. However, it appeared that perhaps in this one area, she had gotten her own way since her dress was a more fitted, and yet still elegant, style. She looked absolutely beautiful as she waited to begin her walk down the aisle to meet the man she loved. Before Adrianne was able to notice much more about the dress, the congregation around her rose to their feet as the organist began to play the Bridal March.
It wasn’t until Lindsay arrived at the front of the sanctuary that Adrianne was able to take in more details of her gown. But her focus didn’t remain there for long though as the service got underway.
Things started off in a very traditional sense, but then the person presiding over the ceremony explained that they would be including a few things from the groom’s mother’s culture. Adrianne enjoyed the explanations for those cultural additions over the course of the ceremony. She would be the first to admit that she didn’t have a whole lot of experience with cultures other than her own. That was one of the reasons she hoped to travel and explore parts of the world.
Normally she braced herself if it appeared that the vows had been written by the bride and groom, but she’d let her guard down as she’d focused on the details of the wedding, and as Than began to speak to Lindsay, Adrianne could feel her throat tightening with emotion.
“When I first met you, Linds, I had no idea of the impact you’d come to have on my life. I knew you were different—and I wasn’t entirely sure it was in a good way—when you made me dress up and take you somewhere really nice for our first date, and then you refused to go out with me on a second one. I know you assumed that I was upset about that because my pride had been dinged, and while that may have been true at the start, it wasn’t the real reason. When I figured out you quite were serious about not giving me that second date, I felt a real sense of loss. It was as if my heart knew what my mind took a lot longer to figure out, and that was that you were someone who was going to be very important to me for the rest of my life.
“Taking that missions trip with you to the Philippines opened my eyes to a lot of things about myself. Quite a few of them were not very flattering. But being around you made me want to be a better man. And that caused me to reevaluate my life on several levels. That trip to the Philippines and meeting the people there, saved my soul, but you, my darling Lindsay, you saved my heart.
“Before I met you, the idea of standing in a spot like this would’ve caused me to run in the opposite direction. But this morning as I prepared for today, all I felt was a sense of anticipation and joy because our life together begins here today. And there’s no one else I would rather spend the rest of my days with than you.”
Adrianne swallowed hard and took a couple of shallow breaths hoping to ease the very real tension in her chest. Her heart literally ached with the longing to have someone feel that way about her. She blinked rapidly and willed the tears that had gathered in her eyes not to fall. And it wasn’t because she didn’t want to be seen crying at a wedding—everybody cried at weddings—but she was afraid that if she started, she wouldn’t be able to stop.
~*~
Connor stared around the room as the reception got underway. He was beginning to wish that he’d declined the opportunity to attend the wedding. It had been bad enough sitting beside Adrianne—who had looked exceptionally beautiful—in an emotionally charged ceremony. But after arriving at the reception, people had constantly been assuming that he and Adrianne were there as a couple. He had anticipated that possibility, but what he hadn’t anticipated was the dull ache that would grow from being friend-zoned over and over again.
Anytime someone—usually from BlackThorpe—had inquired about their status, he had left it up to Adrianne to respond. And she had without hesitation. He knew that it was nothing more than he deserved, but that didn’t make it hurt any less.
“It looks like we’re at this table with you guys.”
Connor glanced over to see Kelsey standing next to the two empty chairs at their table. She had a tall dark-haired man standing right behind her. He pulled out the chair next to Melanie then after Kelsey was seated, he took the chair between her and Marcus. Kelsey introduced her date, and though he initially appeared a bit tense, Jeff Stevens seemed to relax as people around the table spoke with him.
Though Connor had seen Jeff at Alex and Rebecca’s wedding, this was the first time he’d officially met him. Connor fell back onto old habits and spent a few minutes observing him as he interacted with Kelsey and the others at the table. Connor happened to glance from Kelsey’s date to Marcus’s sister just as they each turned to face Marcus. His brain immediately cataloged the side profiles of each of them, making note of the similarities between the two of them.
Just as it wasn’t unusual to have siblings who looked nothing alike, it was also not unusual to run across strangers who shared certain characteristics. Since he saw a bit of that with Meredith and Kelsey’s boyfriend, he added Marcus to the mix, not too surprised when there were fewer similarities beyond hair color and skin tone.
After having his boredom temporarily relieved by that exercise, Connor tried to focus on the conversation around the table, grateful that at least for the time being—since their table was full—there would be no more are you guys here together type of questions.
A few minutes later, someone called for their attention and then welcomed the newly married Mr. and Mrs. Nathaniel Miller into the large ballroom where the reception was being held.
Throughout the course of the evening, Connor allowed himself to be drawn into conversation with the others at the table as he ate a truly delicious meal. It certainly met his expectation of the type of meal it would be given the extravagance of the wedding.
He was glad to see that Kelsey had apparently put the events of the attack behind her since she appeared to be enjoying her evening with her date. The man had entered into the conversation without any hesitation, often sharing stories from his job as an ER nurse that even Connor had to admit were quite funny at times.
Adrianne also seemed to be enjoying herself but declined, as did Marcus’s sister, to join the other single women when they were called out onto the dance floor to catch the bride’s bouquet. Melanie and Kelsey, however, had no problem getting out there to battle for Lindsay’s beautiful floral arrangement. Connor wasn’t sure why Adrianne chose not to join them, but he wasn’t about to ask her about it. Nor would he encourage her to go out there if it wasn’t what she wanted to do.
Once that was finished, Lindsay and Than cut the cake then the dance floor was opened to the guests. Marcus’s sister immediately got to her feet and tugged her brother out onto the floor with her. Tyler and Melanie followed shortly after. As did Alex and Rebecca. Watching the couples begin to dance, Connor was surprised to see that Marcus and Meredith were quite good. While some on the dance floor just swayed and kind of shuffled around, Marcus and his sister actually moved smoothly together and executed some moves that they had clearly practiced.
He looked back to see that Kelsey and her boyfriend were no longer at the table which left only him and Adrianne. She was watching the crowd, and Connor wondered if he should ask her to dance. Everything had gon
e wrong when she’d asked him to go to that dance with her years ago. Maybe it was his turn to put himself out there for her. He wasn’t thrilled at the idea of being shot down, but maybe she would understand that he was trying to make up for what he’d done to her in high school. Even though he knew in his heart that it really was impossible to make amends adequately at all, let alone with one single dance.
Connor leaned forward and spoke loud enough to be heard over the music. “Would you like to dance?”
Adrianne turned toward him, the blue of her eyes was startlingly intense as she stared at him. He had no doubt she was running through several things in her mind. Her gaze slid away, and she once again watched the crowd, not that far from where they sat. Connor wondered if she planned to just ignore him. He supposed it was nothing more than he deserved.
He sat back in his chair and looked for Marcus and his sister once again. Their style definitely suited the type of music that Lindsay and Than had chosen. The big band sound with a waltz beat combined with Marcus and his sister’s polished moves made watching much more fun than actually dancing.
“Yes.”
The single word jerked Connor from his observations, and he looked back at Adrianne. “Yes?”
Her brows drew together. “You don’t want to dance?”
“No. I mean, yes. I was just surprised you said yes.”
“If you don’t want to—“
Connor held up his hand to stop her. “I want to.” He held out his hand as the song ended and another one began. “Let’s dance.”
It wasn’t until she’d placed her hand in his and he’d led her to the dance floor that Connor recognized the song that had started playing. If he hadn’t gone undercover to work for a crazy drug lord who’d had a penchant for eighties’ love songs, he might not have. As it was, he’d learned the lyrics of way more songs of that decade than he’d ever wanted to, all without ever singing a single note.
Knowing the lyrics to this particular song made Connor hesitate a moment before placing his hand gently on her back and, being careful to leave a respectful distance between them, beginning to lead her around the dance floor. Try as he might, his mind wouldn’t stop singing along with the couple who were doing as good a job with All My Life as Linda Ronstadt and Aaron Neville had done when they’d first performed it.
It wasn’t too difficult to pick up on the moment when Adrianne clued into the lyrics. The way her back tensed under his hand was a pretty good indicator. As was the tightening of her grip on his hand. Had this dance ended up setting them back a step? But she could hardly blame him for the song. It wasn’t like he’d known what song would be playing when he asked her to dance. Although, given that all the songs that had been played so far were love songs, anything playing while they’d danced would likely have been a bit awkward.
Since noticing details was second nature to him, he wasn’t too surprised that his mind had begun to take note of the experience of having Adrianne in his arms. The feel of the lace of her dress beneath his fingertips. The subtle scent of the perfume she wore. The way the fullness of her skirt brushed against his pant legs as they moved around the dance floor. The softness of her hand in his.
“They are crazy good,” Adrianne said, interrupting his observations.
Connor glanced at the people around them then looked at her. “Marcus and his sister?”
He bent his head down a little so he could hear her over the music.
“Yeah,” Adrianne said as she glanced up at him before looking back at the couple as they waltzed past them—literally. “I think it’s sweet that Marcus dances with her like that.”
Sweet and Marcus weren’t words that Connor thought went together. At least not very often. He had to admit though that they did seem to apply in this instance. The smile on the young woman’s face as they moved together to the music was the first he’d seen from her all evening. Clearly, it was something she enjoyed doing, and that Marcus indulged her was really…sweet.
“Sorry I’m not up to Marcus’s talent,” Connor said as he looked down again at Adrianne, a little surprised that after tensing up, she had relaxed again.
She met his gaze and smiled, her eyes alight with laughter. “I’m nowhere near Meredith’s dancing ability either, so I think we’re even.”
Connor didn’t care much for dancing to modern music, but the song style the bridal couple had chosen was well suited to gentle movements and conversation. It might not have been the type of dance he and Adrianne would have had as teenagers, but he hoped that maybe it was a positive memory to help the negative one fade just a bit. He didn’t believe for a moment that she would ever be able to forget what had happened between them, but he hoped that eventually, things like this might help her move forward.
~*~
Adrianne wondered if Connor could hear how her heart was pounding as they danced. The pulse of each beat of her heart seemed to be as loud as the music. She couldn’t believe she’d agreed to dance with him, but that little voice of hope in her head had grabbed at the chance even as she was planning to reject his invitation. The logical side of her said that he’d asked her to dance simply because it was kind of awkward to be the only couple at the table not dancing. The romantic—and oh so hopeful—side of her wanted to attach more meaning to it.
Of course, the song choice didn’t help keep her romantic feelings in check. Of all the songs…that would have to be the one to start to play as they’d begun to dance. He hadn’t known any better than her what the song would be, but it had still been a bit awkward. Finally, she’d just pushed the lyrics out of her mind and focused on something else. It was the only way to get through the dance.
As he’d bent his head down when they’d been talking about Marcus, she found herself wanting to step closer to him. To feel the strength of his arms that his large calloused hand hinted at. But they didn’t have the relationship that Rebecca and Alex had that would allow them that physical closeness.
The ache in her chest was very real as the song came to its conclusion. Grabbing hold of what little emotional control she still had, Adrianne stepped back from Connor and smiled. “Thank you for the dance.”
As she turned from the dance floor, Adrianne noticed that Alex and Rebecca were taking their seats. Grateful that the awkwardness of being alone at the table with Connor wouldn’t be an issue, Adrianne hurried to her seat. She didn’t miss the look Alex and Rebecca gave them as they sat back down, but they didn’t comment.
Melanie and Tyler returned shortly after but Marcus stayed out with Meredith, as did Kelsey and her boyfriend.
“Man, I could barely tolerate one dance, and Marcus is going on what? Three songs now?” Tyler said as he stared out at the dance floor.
“You barely tolerated?” Melanie asked with an arch of her brow.
Tyler reached out to brush the back of his hand down her cheek. “Being with you was the best part. It was the moving and the music that weren’t quite my thing.”
Adrianne rolled her eyes as Melanie visibly melted at his words even though she fought a wave of longing for the easy relationship Melanie and Tyler seemed to enjoy. Even if things changed between her and Connor, they would always have that horrible history between them. She’d always know—even if it was in the very back of her mind—that he had done more than just reject her. He’d shredded her heart with his words and moved on without a backward glance in her direction.
Suddenly, the warmth she’d carried back to the table from her one dance with Connor was gone, like a flickering flame doused by a deluge. And that’s how it would always be. The memories constantly there between them in a way that they just couldn’t overcome. Maybe if he’d come to her in the weeks following what had happened to apologize and try to make things right, things would have been different now. But he hadn’t. And from that point until the day she’d seen him again just before Christmas, he hadn’t looked her in the eye.
Would there ever come a point, Adrianne wondered, where she didn’t
think about the what if’s? Probably not, so long as both of them were single. With Melanie and Tyler and Rebecca and Alex all paired off, if she and Connor wanted to go along with them, it was almost as if they were setting themselves up on a date. Even tonight, people assumed they were a couple because the six of them had arrived and sat together. Adrianne wasn’t sure how to avoid those assumptions without raising questions, particularly from Alex and Rebecca. If, all of a sudden, she and Connor seemed to be making an effort to avoid each other, there would no doubt be questions.
And rehashing the past with Alex was the very last thing Adrianne wanted to do. So she’d have to grin and bear it, and hope that one of them would find someone else to date sooner rather than later.
When they left the reception a short time later, Adrianne breathed a sigh of relief. She was more than ready to be done with the day and all that it had entailed. It had been a beautiful wedding, and she was very happy for Than and Lindsay, but she was also very ready to go home.
~*~
Connor leaned back in his chair as he listened to Jordan talk about his upcoming trip to see his friend in Chicago. They’d all gone to church together then agreed to meet up at a nearby restaurant for lunch. Alex’s parents had left already, but the rest of them had lingered over dessert and conversation.
“Well, if it isn’t Mack the quarterback,” a voice boomed from beside him. Connor glanced up to see a large man standing there, a broad grin on his face. “I’d heard you were back in town, Connor. Why didn’t you look me up?”
With a sinking feeling in his stomach, Connor got to his feet and tried to angle himself so that the man’s view of the table would be limited. But unfortunately, his efforts were in vain.
Beauty from Ashes: A Christian Romance (BlackThorpe Security Book 5) Page 21