by Sonya Jesus
"Yes, that's what I always strived for, a better life than our parents. This truck, though, was bought out of sadness and stress. I drove by the lot one day, saw it, and said fuck it. Left the same day with it and a lot less cash," he says flatly as he runs his left hand over the steering wheel.
"You paid for this thing with cash? Did it come lifted? Had to have cost a pretty penny. Didn't realize you were doing that well for yourself." Ugh. "I didn't mean it to sound like that. Sorry, that was so rude of me to say. We haven't seen each other in a long time. I'm happy you are doing so well at your shop. It's definitely scary starting a business from scratch like that."
"Mags, stop rambling; it's fine. I didn't buy this truck or build my company to be showy and to have showy friends. I lost my way for a moment, and mostly everyone I care about or love didn't witness my stumble; I thank god every day for that.” He takes a deep sigh. "It got hard being around you, and I was so busy learning and perfecting my craft that being away became easier. When the shit hit the fan and I was alone, buying this truck made me feel better. A band-aid over my oozing heart and pride."
"Sorry, you went through all of that alone. I know sometimes it's easier to handle personal crap on your own, but it's nice to have a least one person to talk to. Maybe one day you can purge your soul to me and feel better. I have a way of making people feel better," I say, showing him my shit-eating grin. The truck ride got a little darker than I was hoping. Need to brighten it up again, make it breathable again.
"Woman," he growls and then nips at my fingertips. I can so get on board with all this touching. I'm sure some of this conversation we are having, or rather not having, has something to do with a woman. Even if we stay friends forever, I will hunt her down and maim her when I find out the whole situation. "I don't even want to think about you making other people feel better."
"That almost sounds like you are a little jealous of who I made feel better." I poke him in his side, not too hard since we are flying down the highway, but he felt it; I saw the little flinch.
"These shoes were so not a smart choice tonight. My feet are killing me. It's all your damn sister's fault." I stretch my toes out as I take my wedges off.
"I won't lie. For a split second, I almost walked by you because of your outfit. Is this how you dress all the time now?"
I give him a blank stare. Does he really not know me at all?
"Okay, okay I get it, but you do look gorgeous tonight. Then again, you look gorgeous dressed up or dressed in your t-shirts and jean shorts. You are so laidback gorgeous; it's not even funny." I can feel my face go instantly red. I’m not talking a gradual red, but boom, I'm-red-from-head-to-toe red. "Don't be shy or embarrassed now; you damn well know you are."
I think my brain combusted because I can't form a word even if I try. "Well, I guess I've been called pretty and told I really don't need to wear make-up, but laidback gorgeous, I don't think, no I know, no one has ever called me that or at least not to my face." I definitely would remember that. He shakes his head in what I would believe is disbelief but doesn't argue the matter anymore.
Watching the world fly by us in a constant state of movement, I don't even realize we are close to my house, and then, he is pulling up to the front of my parents' house. Instant melancholy takes over in my belly. I don't know what's going to happen next between us or really what happened this evening at all. I want to keep these awesome memories as that, awesome memories, but another part of me wants to question him on a million different things that happened tonight.
"So," I'm so nervous, but this is me taking a step back, "tonight was fun."
He turns toward me with his own shit-eating grin on his face. "Yeah, we did have a lot of fun. Don't think this is only going to be a one-time thing, Mags. I'm a busy guy with the shop, but I'm not disappearing again like last time. I know it hurt you, even though you never said anything."
"Well, of course it hurt, especially after all the trouble you gave Sass and I throughout our high school years. It was like one day you were around being an obnoxious brother, and next thing I know, you were gone. Let's face it, even when you were around, you really weren't there, but I don't blame you. High school is a weird time for kids, and though we aren't that far apart in age, in school it's a huge age gap."
"Things got complicated with my life; priorities took over, and my focus went anywhere else other than you." Ouch, right? I'm not sure how I'm supposed to take this little speech of his. "No, my focus always wanted your attention, but I just couldn't draw you in and then hurt you. There is a lot you don't know about, even George and Sass don't know, and I want to leave it at that right now."
"As long as you stay open and honest with me, we are good, and I will be open and honest with you, too. I start my new job soon, so my life will be chaotic, too. I want this more than anything, and if we didn't already have a close relationship, I wouldn't be telling you this at all." Telling him that last part was not part of the plan, but it just fell out of my mouth. Now I have to live with it.
I don't want to sit out front of my parents' house for too long but being sort of snuggled up in here with him is seriously a dream come true. Plus, I've never been in something so nice before, and these seats suck you in and hold on tight. I know I'm older, but my dad will snoop sooner or later, and I'm not ready for any dad questions. Dad might find it strange, or he might not, but I'm not ready to cross any of that yet.
"I'm going to go so that nobody becomes snoopy and ruins this last little bit. I want to see you again and talk. I'm willing to wait and take it slow if that's what we need." Leaning in to him, I peck his cheek and reach for the door handle.
"Mags?" Del whispers out.
"Yeah?" I whisper back.
"This is just the beginning for us. No matter what happens, it's me and you." Smiling back at him, I slam the door shut and walk to the front door. He waits until I open the door and step into the house before he takes off down the road. I'll be walking on air for a few days, I can feel it, and if I wrote in a journal, I totally would lie on my bed writing in it and daydreaming about Del and this night.
"Honey, who brought you home? That is not Sass's car," my dad asks. Looking into the living room, I notice my mom is still up too. It's not late by any means, but they are normally lying in bed by now.
"Del brought me home. We got separated at the fireworks, and it was crazy packed, so he just brought me back."
"Oh, that was nice of him. He was always a nice boy," Mom chimes in.
"What are you guys still doing up at this hour or at least down here?" I ask, now noticing she isn't in her pjs either.
"Well, sweetheart, we have some good, life-changing news," Dad says, sticking out his chest proudly.
"Okay, so what is the good news?"
"I went in on a long shot with a few co-workers and made a bunch of money. Well, it's more than a bunch of money."
"Wait, what are you talking about? Did you keep this a secret, and what kind of long shot was it?" So many questions are bouncing around in my head right now. Maybe this can help me get my dream job quicker and out of the gas station sooner.
"Don't worry about any of that, sweetheart. All you need to know is that we are basically set for life now, and you never have to work again if you don't want to," Dad says again like this happens all the time. "We are moving, too, in a few weeks, and there will be no need to pack because we can now afford a company to come in and move everything we want to keep. No heavy lifting for anyone. The good life is waiting for us on Highfalutin Way."
"What the hell is Highfalutin Way? This is a lot to take in and at almost midnight." I need to sit down and try to let all these words sink in.
"This will all make sense tomorrow when you have time to sleep on it, and Highfalutin Way is our new address on the other side of town. The side of town made of money.”
What did I just come home to?
To Be Continued
A. E. Gamrat
Growing up writing was
second nature that soon become a distant memory. Turning 30 (not saying when) that memory was going to be brought back to life. Lover of all books I try to grab my audience in and never let go. Hoping to get all these thoughts and ideas down for everyone to enjoy, even if it's a moment or a life time.
This is the new chapter of my life story. Hope everyone enjoys!
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Neon Summer
By Linny Lawless
CINDY
Hazy and hot Spring Break, 1987. It was my first time away from college and my smothering parents. I wanted to break free, just like my girlfriend, Angie, wild and free and knew how to have fun. But I felt I was struck by lightning when that fine-looking guitar player blocks my path. I felt his sexual energy, but he was a total jerk and I didn’t know any heavy metal headbangers back home. He made me weak in the knees and I wanted to show him my wild side.
ERIC
I knew she was a virgin the moment she walked toward me in that dark hallway at the nightclub. Long, dark, wavy hair, innocent looking, and she was curvy in all the right places. I was more into groupie chicks who liked to party all night after a gig. But there was something about Cindy, other than her innocence. I could sense she was a wild cat, even though she kept it hidden underneath her snob attitude. And I was game to draw the wild cat out.
Copyright © 2018 Linny Lawless
CINDY
It was a hot and humid afternoon out on the beach. My girlfriend Angie was sunbathing with me, her neon blue leopard print bikini hugged her perfect figure. I laid next to her, wearing the bikini I bought at last minute – neon pink with black polka dots. Her long blond hair was pulled back in a banana clip, and her pink shades reflected the sun. She tapped her foot to the beat of “Walk Like an Egyptian” blaring from the boom box radio wedged in the sand between our towels.
I loved Angie. We went through grade school and high school together, and we finished our first year of college at George Mason. We were like two puzzle pieces that fit together. She was the outgoing type, and I the miss home-body. She was much more popular in high school and made friends easily. And she had way more experience than me when it came to guys.
We lived in the same preppie neighborhood and both of us were spoiled by our parents. My father worked as a salesman in the new wave technology business of fax machines, copiers, printers and other gadgets. Me and my older brother , Tommy never had a worry and was handed anything we wanted from our parents. He was a few years older than me and still hung out with his friends from high school.
My dad gave me a pager, which was the most totally awesome gadget ever invented. It was a little square box the size of a zippo lighter that began to vibrate next to my thigh. The little screen displayed a ten-digit phone number.
“It’s Tommy. I have to go find a pay phone to call him back.” I stood up from my beach towel, wiping sand off my butt.
Angie blew a bubble with her chewing gum and it popped, “Oh Cin. I thought we had a few more hours to hang on the beach together?”
“I’ll just tell Tommy we’ll meet him later. He’s going to that bar Sting Rays tonight. I’m supposed to with go him and Kelly.”
Angie sighed. Her foot stopped tapping to the Bangles song. She lifted her shades up over her forehead. Her eyes squinted from the sunlight as she looked up at me, “Your brother is an asshole. Why do you have to go with him? You and me can just go to some other bar.”
Angie wasn’t too fond of Tommy. He dropped out of his second year at college and really didn’t care about his future. He lived in the moment. And since my parents adored him, they didn’t push him to better himself. Tommy was gifted with the good combination of my parents’ looks, where as I felt just. Plain. So, I focused on my education more than I focused on anything else. I had long dark hair that I didn’t really spend too much time on. Angie was the complete opposite. She chose the right outfit that accentuated her attributes and spent more time on her hair and make-up.
“I’m sorry Ang… I know you and Tommy don’t get along. But my parents worry too much and pressured Tommy to watch over me while we’re here at the beach.”
We rode with Tommy and his girlfriend, Kelly to Sting Rays. Tommy parked the car and turned toward me and Angie sitting in the back seat, “Don’t embarrass me Cin. Only reason I brought you and Angie along is because I promised mom and dad I’d make sure you stay out of trouble.”
Angie pulled a cigarette out of her purse and flicked her lighter. Tommy reached out and snatched it from her mouth, crushing it in his hand.
“Hey!” Angie whined.
“Smoke it outside or in the bar. Not in the car Ang!”
It was going to be a long night. I climbed out of the backseat of Tommy’s Chevy Malibu before anyone else did. The humid air clung to my body. I gathered my hair off the nape of my neck. Kelly finished off a joint with Tommy and giggled as she stumbled out of the passenger side of the car.
“Totally un-cool Cin. You deserve a better brother than the one you got stuck with.” Angie huffed beside me as she pulled out a new cigarette from her purse and lit it.
The sign for String Rays Nightclub glowed in neon blue. I followed Tommy and Kelly inside, as Poison’s new song “Cry Tough” screamed through speakers. The club was small and narrow and I felt swallowed up into the crowd. I walked through a haze of cigarette smoke, as neon beer signs hung from behind the bar. A set of drums and several guitars on stands sat on a stage several yards in front of us. A printed flyer tacked to a cork board and taped on walls showcased the band who would be playing that night. The photo was in black and white of the band, with the name “Steel Dragon” written in gothic themed letters above it.
I turned to look behind me searching for Angie. I reached out for Tommy pulling on the back of his t-shirt, “Wait for me and Angie!”
He spun around, his arm still draped over Kelly, “It’s too packed in here to babysit the two of you!” he barked as loud as he could over the loud Poison song. He turned away and sauntered through the crowded bar with Kelly. Leaving me standing there. Alone.
“Cin! I Got us some beers!” Angie appeared - thank goodness! And handed me a bottle. “Oh my god, the lead singer of Steel Dragon totally winked at me! I hope you won’t hate me, but I really want to hang out with him tonight. He could introduce us to the band!” Angie’s eyes were round and bright.
I didn’t want to be the lame party pooper and ruin her night. “Ok Ang. I’ll just follow you.” We weaved through the thick crowd of long hair, torn jeans, and neon clothing. Beside the stage was a long dark hallway. I assumed it lead to the bathrooms and a private room for the performing band.
Angie was suddenly several paces in front of me, and disappeared. Again. I sped up my pace, weaving through people toward the dark hallway. It was very narrow, and my eyesight had to adjust to the sudden darkness in contrast to the bright neon lights. A man’s leg, covered in stone washed torn jeans shot out in front of me, his boot thumping against the wall. And blocking my path.
“You lost Babe?” I turned toward the sound of a deep voice. He was sitting on a wooden chair to my right. I couldn’t make out his face, but his hair appeared to be long, just past his shoulders. And he sounded arrogant.
“Ah. No. I’m trying to find my friend. She came this way.”
“You shouldn’t go back there. Not alone anyway.”
“How is that even your business?” Now I was ticked off. But he didn’t move his leg, and it brushed against my hip.
He stood up and stepped closer to me. He was so tall! I couldn’t make out the color of his eyes, but I c
ould make out a square jaw. I noticed a dark spot on his bicep that appeared to be a tattoo. “Your friend’s in the room back stage. With Zeek. He’s the singer in my band.” That’s when I recognized him, from photo on the Steel Dragon flyer. He offered his hand to me. “Come on. I’ll take you.”
I took his hand. His palm was wide, and his fingers were long. And it was very warm, sending goosebumps up my arm. I followed him down the hall and he led me into the room. He closed the door, muffling out the loud music and voices. I just walked into a private party. He leaned into me, “I’m guessing that’s your friend?”
Eric found Angie for me. She was giggling with a guy who’s image was also on the Steel Dragon flyer. He was the lead singer called “Zeek”. His long jet black was teased out big, and he wore black eyeliner and black lipstick. He dressed all in black, except for a red leather vest.
I turned back to look into the tall stranger’s eyes. I could see them better in the room. And they were blue. His hair was the color of chestnut. “Yes, that’s her… Thanks.”
His eyes were so very blue and intense, that I got lost in them. His mouth was set in a straight line, “I’m Eric.” And he still held onto my hand.
“I’m Cindy.”
Eric was the first to look away. He put his thumb and forefinger into his mouth and blew a loud, high pitched screeching whistle. “Yo Zeek! “
Angie rushed over to me, squealing. “Hey Cin!” she just then noticed Eric, “Hi! I’m Angie. You’re the guitar player, right?”
He smiled this time. At Angie. “Yeah, that’s me.” He didn’t say much, but his hotness made up for it.
Angie pulled me closer to her, away from Eric, “So Zeek wants us to hang out with them tonight after the gig!”
“Oh Angie. Really? I don’t think Tommy – “
“Who cares what he thinks. He’s such a hoser! I totally want to hang out with these head bangers. Please Cin?” She whined and showed me her pouty bottom lip.