Eylsa pouted as she rocked forward onto her hands and flipped up to her feet. Gregor nodded in approval. “Is there anything else we can do for you, Brendan?”
Brendan shook his head. “No, no, I’m good.” His eyes remained locked on Eylsa as he made his way downstairs, snatching at the railing as he lost his footing.
He froze on the steps as he waited for his heartbeat to slow. He scoffed. “Fool.” Entering the kitchen, he tossed the pen onto the table beside his notebook.
A musical note rang through the house, pulling him to the front door. Outside on the porch was a pile of folders tied with a string. On top of the folders was a note.
Brendan tore the letter free and rolled his eyes at the neat, cramped writing.
I will need these by the end of the day.
Arna.
“Thanks, Arna,” he grumbled. “Would have had a hard time occupying myself without you.”
“What was that noise?”
He looked up at Eylsa as she trotted down the stairs.
“Just a gift from my dear friend Arna.” He hefted the pile of folders and dropped them on the table. “Exercise over?”
She stuffed her hands in her pockets. “Gregor went out.”
His eyes widened in shock. “Out?”
“He’ll be back.”
He pulled a chair around and dropped in front of his paperwork.
She slid into the chair next to him and leaned in to read over his shoulder. “What is it you do?”
“Well, these are all reports on illegal activity. I work in a department of the Tribunal that investigates and prosecutes breaches in the law.”
Chin resting on his shoulder, she tapped the folder in front of them. “Doesn’t sound very exciting.”
“It can be.” He shuffled through the files. “This is a murder case that is over three years ol— Oh wait, this was you.” He tossed the folder aside before moving to the next one in the cache. “Hey look, this one is the report of your disappearance from your prince.”
Her face remained stoic. “Ashlan will not soon give up. He had such plans for his killer queen.” She pulled back from him. “Keena would force you to be her mate?”
“Something like that.”
“And it isn’t right?”
“No.”
She laid her hand over his as she smiled up into his eyes. “I don’t want you to have to do that for me.”
“Trust me, it isn’t first on my list.”
“So when we are done here, you will send me to a prison.”
He cleared his throat and pulled his eyes away from hers as he slid his hand free. “I’m not sure. The Tribunal will have to decide on where you belong, but we will definitely put in a good reference for you.”
She cocked her head to the side. “You do not want me in prison? I thought that’s where you send bad people?”
“Well…yeah, but—”
“Only bad people kill other people, so prison is where I belong.”
“It’s a little more complicated than that now, isn’t it?”
“How is it complicated?”
“Well, you’re helping us now and not killing people anymore.”
“But I did kill them, none of this erases that.”
“I know but—”
“Does admitting you are a criminal make you good? That seems a bit shortsighted. What if I change my mind? I could start killing tomorrow. What is there to stop me? Am I still good because I helped you or would that make me bad again?”
He grabbed her face, pulling her eyes to his. “I don’t want you to go to jail.”
She blinked. “Why?”
He could feel his pulse increase as he stared into her sharp blue eyes. She watched him frozen in his hands.
“What has changed that you no longer wish me to be confined away?” she asked.
“I care about you now.”
She jerked free of his grip, stalking to the kitchen in a rage. “So you’d let someone run free just because you like them? That’s a pretty stupid reason.”
He was on his feet in a blink and pinned her to the wall by her shoulders. “Why are you so infuriating? I’ve never met a woman who can drive me insane faster than you!”
Her eyes screamed defiance as he pressed the length of his body along hers. She tensed against him as his lips found hers. His hand slid up to her neck.
Her body melted into his.
He jerked back, aware of his misstep, heart pounding in his chest. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have done that.”
Her fingers trembled along her lips as she watched him retreat across the room. “Why not?”
He raked his hair with his hands. “I just…it wasn’t right. You’re here under my protection, it’s wrong to take advantage of that.”
Her brow wrinkled. “So you think I’m weak?”
“What? No! It’s just…you might feel obligated to me since we are helping you.” His arms wrapped around his head in a futile attempt to fend off the racing uncertainties in his mind.
“And that would be a bad thing?” Her voice was confused.
Guilt knotted his stomach. “Yes. We are not helping you just to get something in return.”
“But you are helping me to get information about the Trinity.”
With a loud roar, he swept the folders from the table and stormed from the room.
* * *
She stared at the pile of papers scattered across the floor.
“You have angered him.” Gregor ghosted from a corner to stop at her side.
“I always anger him.” She stared down at her feet. Her side had seemed clear; she couldn’t imagine what was confusing him.
She turned to face Gregor. “Do you understand what he was talking about?”
“The people of this world have different rules than we do; you must always remember that if this is your chosen course.”
Her mind rang with uncertainty. “But why can’t I understand them? He acts as if it should just come to me!”
“That is because it just comes to him. They do not have to think about it because they were raised to think that way.”
Her fingers drifted back to her lips, hovering there as she stared into the next room.
Gregor laid a hand across her shoulders. “Do not worry. Either you will eventually understand it or you will no longer need to.” He slipped from the house.
She could still feel the ghost of Brendan’s lips on hers, his intensity and fire fueling curiosity in her stomach. His stubbornness she could understand, determination… He had many traits she could admire but so much of him was completely foreign to her. Her jaw tightened. This was nothing but another challenge, and she had nothing but experience with challenges. This was no different.
She pulled a deep breath as she followed Brendan into a small den in the back of the house. Bent over his knees cradling his head, he ignored her entrance as he muttered under his breath. She leaned back against the doorframe behind her, arms across her chest. “Just because you are helping me doesn’t mean you purchased me.”
His head rose, his face unreadable.
She moved toward him and kneeled on the floor at his feet. “When an assassin is hired, it is under a set of rules that cannot be broken. But I was not hired. Master purchased me. There is no contract on use for a sale, only an exchange of gold.”
She searched his face but his empty stare drew her lips tight in consternation.
“He is not your master.”
She rested her hands on his knees. “But he was. In all ways. I was not his assassin, I was his property. Do you understand?”
His eyes moved back and forth between hers, frustrating in their incomprehension. “I already know all this. Why are you telling me again?”
She struggled for some way to make him see, make him understand. “Ashlan could make me his wife, but it was not my will. I had no say in it.” She growled. Anger flared within her. “You see, I must go to prison. How can I live in your world if I ca
n’t even communicate!”
He grabbed her hand as she paced by him, stopping her. “What are you trying to say, Eylsa?”
She dropped into the chair beside him and pulled his hand into her lap. “You did not purchase me. I do not have to marry you.”
He nodded, then his brows dropped low. “Wait…what?”
Her eyes flashed anger as she jerked him from his seat and pinned him to the floor, straddling him. She bent down over him, whispering against his ear. “I could kill you before you could even react. I am trained to be able to outmaneuver and overpower people who are physically stronger than I am.”
She jumped to her feet, staring down at him in triumph.
He remained on the floor. “Are you trying to tell me you want to go back?”
He jerked back as she dropped to the floor beside him. “I’m trying to tell you that I am not helpless. I was going to marry Ashlan because he purchased me and I had no say. But I own myself now. I can do as I please, and you cannot stop me.”
“I—”
“Shh.” She held a finger to his lips and slid in closer to him, excitement brightening her eyes. “Can I ask you a question?”
He pulled back from her, his face drawn in nervous anticipation. “Can I have a translator?”
She waved him off. “Don’t be ridiculous. Should it always be so…I don’t have a word. It felt rather like the excitement of a hunt.”
His eyes shifted as his mind groped for something, anything to hold on to. “What are you talking about?”
“The hunt is very exciting. My heart pounds, my skin tingles, the whole world comes alive.” Her eyes sparkled as she gazed up at the ceiling, fingers curled into fists.
He nodded, face still blank and searching for understanding. “No, I meant, what is exciting?”
“A kiss.”
He shook his head; obviously he had heard her wrong. “You can’t tell me Ashlan never kissed you. He was your fiancé.”
Her eyes dulled as her body deflated. “Ashlan kissed me often. It was just something I had to do, never really seemed any different than anything else I had to do.”
“You should never have to kiss anyone. It should be your choice.”
Her brow wrinkled. “I just said that. Do you listen to anything I say?”
He stared at her in confusion. “Is that what you were saying?”
She threw her hands up. “You are impossible! Do you know that?”
“I’m impossible? I’m not even sure you speak English!” They stared at each other for a moment before breaking into laughter. “I promise, I will not try to kiss you again.”
Her face fell in confusion. “Why not?”
“I don’t want to try and force you to do anything you don’t want to do.”
“That is not what I said.”
He rolled his eyes. “I would ask you to explain that, but I doubt I would understand the explanation.”
She sighed in exasperation. “What I said is that you couldn’t force me to do anything. Do you really think that you are intimidating to me?”
“Well no, but—”
“Well, you aren’t. Just because I cannot kill anyone does not mean I am helpless, and I will not sit here and let you treat me like I am!”
“I never said you were helpless.”
“Did you not? You think I would be afraid of losing your help. I am not afraid. If you won’t help me, I’m sure I can find someone who will be glad to escort me to a prison. And another thing: There’s nothing you can give that I can’t handle!”
She tangled her fists in his hair and locked her mouth over his before she jumped to her feet and stormed from the room.
* * *
Cade tossed his coat over the rack beside the door before he turned and crossed the room. He eyed the pile of untouched files stacked neatly next to Brendan before dropping to a chair beside him. “Productive day?”
“Are all women crazy or just the ones I have to deal with?”
“That much fun, huh?”
“Gregor went out”—he waved his hand over the table—“just out, but he’ll be back. Shouldn’t worry overmuch about some random unpredictable retired assassin traipsing about Lower Balla, right?”
“I’m sure he knows how to handle himself.”
“That’s what I’m afraid of.”
Cade waved him off. “How is our other guest?”
“Ellie? She seems fine, but to tell you the truth I don’t understand a word she says.”
“Ellie?”
Brendan hitched his eyebrows as an ornery grin spread across his face. “Pet name, she hates it. Quite amusing.”
Cade nodded. “Annoy the trained assassin, sounds like a bit of a risky game to me.” He eyed the pile of files beside Brendan. “About as risky as annoying the boss.”
He glared at the pile of paperwork. “Yeah, I need to get on this, huh.”
“If you want to keep your job, you likely should. I’ll go and entertain our guest to give you some time alone.”
“Good luck with that.”
Cade shook his head as he climbed the stairs and loosened the buttons of his jacket. He knocked on the door, waiting patiently. “Eylsa? You awake?”
The door opened. “Hello Cade.”
He smiled at her as she peeked out from the door. “How did you like the Tribunal this morning?”
Her eyes darkened. “Keena is a bad woman.”
He made his way to one of the stuffed chairs. “Not precisely. She just…well, she’s complicated. Rather like you.”
“So Keena is an assassin?”
He blinked at her. “No, that’s not what I meant. She is not precisely bad, she just makes some bad decisions.”
“You think I made bad decisions?”
“I think you’ve been put into a bad situation. You weren’t ever really given a chance to make a decision.”
Her calm eyes searched his. “Is that why Brendan no longer wants me sent to prison?”
“I can’t answer that.”
“Do you want me sent to prison?”
He paused for a minute, caught off guard. “I’m not so sure about that either. Why don’t you like the name Ellie?”
She sat back, her face a blank mask. “It is not that I don’t like it, it is not my name.”
Cade fought his smile. “No, but it is a version of your name. It is common to shorten the name of someone you care about as a sign of endearment.”
“So what would that be for you?”
He laughed. “Well, it’s a bit hard to shorten Cade, but Brendan’s mother often called him Bren. Seemed to really get under his skin if I remember correctly.”
“If it is a sign of affection, why would he be upset?”
“It’s a little complicated. She often used that name when he was younger, and as he grew it became a little embarrassing.” Her rapid-fire questions were amusing him as he tried to keep up with her.
She stared at her hands for a moment. “Do you think me weak?”
He sputtered a moment staring at her. “Weak? No, I definitely do not think you are weak.”
“Would you feel right if you kissed me?”
His jaw hung open for a moment as his brain failed to process what he heard. “Excuse me?”
“Would you feel like I should feel obligated to you?”
“Do…do you feel obligated to me?”
“No.”
“So why the questions?”
“Why is it so hard for us to understand each other?”
He laughed, rubbing his temples to soothe the ache building there. “That is quite a hot topic among us actually.”
She stared at him expectantly, and he went on.
“I know how we think and act seems strange to you, and you must believe me when I say that you seem just as strange to us most of the time. We were not raised as you were. Our thoughts and actions stem from the values and experiences of our childhood. Our parents teach us how to act and react, much as your teacher
s did you, but we were taught different reactions. We are taught to care for others even if we don’t know them. We are taught to think about how our actions affect others. Does that make sense to you?”
“Like why you follow Darius when he does not dominate you?”
“Yes. We follow him because we respect him as our friend and we trust his decisions.”
“But others hold sway over you that you do not…respect.”
He sat back into the chair and rubbed his chin in contemplation. “That is a bit more complicated. We do not always get to choose the people who are in charge. You did not get to choose who was able to purchase you, right? Sometimes you have to deal with people that it is not your choice to deal with. It’s just a fact of life.”
“So you must follow people like Arna and Keena out of obligation and not respect.”
“Something like that, yes.”
She shuffled, eyes bright with comprehension, but they darkened again quickly. “Why not just eliminate them?”
“That’s not how our world works, Eylsa. If we make a choice to not deal with people like Arna and Keena, we would have to find new jobs. That would be how we would ‘eliminate’ them.”
“So rather than dealing with the objection, you would avoid it.”
He laughed. “Yeah, I guess it would seem that way.”
“If Master would have to deal with someone he didn’t like, he would send me to kill them.”
“He’s not your master. Not anymore. You don’t have to think that way.”
She pressed her hands to her face. “This is so difficult! I am just bad! My mind does not work this way!”
He pulled her hands from her face and waited for her to meet his eyes. “No. If your mind couldn’t work as ours do, you would still be an assassin. You would have killed Darius all those years ago, and likely Brendan as well, as he is a hotheaded fool. You wouldn’t be here now if you couldn’t change.”
“But I am still an assassin.”
“No, you’re not. You can’t be an assassin if you can’t kill people.”
Her eyes sparkled with unshed tears. “That does not change what I am.”
Cade’s smile spread in sympathy. “That is what you were. You can be whatever you want to be now. You are in charge. It is your life and no one can dictate to you what you should do.”
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