by Fox, Addison
And there it was. That whisper of censure that she always sensed in others. She wasn’t fun enough. Her clothes weren’t vibrant enough. She didn’t loosen up enough.
She kept her smile firmly in place and made sure the toast stayed light, but no matter how hard she tried, she couldn’t shake the slightest sense of disappointment.
When would she be enough?
“Why doesn’t anyone ever think I’m having fun?”
“Because you’re not.”
“Excuse me?”
“I know what fun looks like and you, woman, aren’t having it.”
“This is a stupid conversation.” Camryn fought the urge to pace and instead pulled out one of the kitchen chairs. “I have plenty of fun. You’re just pissed I haven’t given in and chosen to have fun with you.”
“You have a point.” Booth took the chair next to hers so they were seated date-style at the small table. “But my point goes well beyond sleeping together, which, for the record, will be a lot of fun. And sexy. And hot. But I digress.”
The promise in his eyes—shining brightly through the subtly teasing words—shot straight to her core and Camryn nearly tossed caution to the winds and leaped into his arms. Instead, she refastened her armor and stared down her nose, suddenly terrified at her inability to resist him. “So back to your point?”
“You’re bright and vibrant and you seem content to let everyone else have all the fun.”
“I’m not unhappy with my life.”
“Oh no?”
That subtle layer of fear—of feeling exposed and naked and vulnerable—grew deeper, lighting up her spine in a shiver. “I hardly think you’ve got a right to—”
He leaned forward and pressed a finger to her lips, silencing her words as the pad of his finger traced the fullness of her lower lip. “It’s just an observation, Camryn. But if you’re so upset about it, prove me wrong.”
…
Camryn stared at her monthly advertising spreadsheet and forced her eyes to uncross. Booth hadn’t stayed long after his request the night before that she prove him wrong, and she’d tossed and turned the rest of the night.
On a heavy sigh, she looked once more at the spreadsheet. The ongoing report detailed how much they’d made by advertiser, by category, and by month, and every single row and column was in the black. So why was the urge to toss her laptop out the window more appealing than diving into the numbers?
She and her sisters had worked long and hard to be in this position. Hell, there’d been a time when she checked the numbers daily, willing them to grow.
Willing the numbers to prove a future for McBride Media.
Willing a future for herself.
“Got what you asked for and then some,” she muttered to herself before rubbing her eyes.
At the beginning, she, Keira, and Mayson had endured several tense months, desperate to prove to their father—and themselves—that they could make something of the company. When had that become so unfulfilling?
She’d done a fair amount of soul-searching over the last year as she watched her sisters move on to the next phase of their lives. At first, she’d worried the subtle disillusionment that colored her days had been because of her sisters’ new lives. She’d believed herself above pettiness, but Camryn was only human.
But her dissatisfaction with life had been hovering in the back of her mind for while now, long before Keira and Mayson found their husbands. The moment she’d realized it, she’d been forced to own the fact that her disillusionment ran a whole lot deeper and had its roots in her breakup with Matt.
The love of her life…until he wasn’t.
Even now, nearly a decade later, that subtle bitterness when she thought of him wouldn’t quite vanish. That he could tell her he loved her—hell, propose to her even, and begin planning their life together—then abandon her when her entire life crumbled around her mother’s illness.
At the moment she’d needed him most he’d walked away. And way down deep inside, in those places that truly counted no matter how hard she tried to keep them locked up tight, that truth hurt. It had been a raw admittance, but a necessary one.
She brushed her hair behind her ear and refocused on the spreadsheet. “And yet another jaunt down memory lane you really don’t have time for.”
She’d nearly completed reviewing their portfolio of car advertisers when her phone rang. Still caught up in just how large the column of numbers was, she didn’t even glance at the caller ID. “Camryn McBride.”
“West Harrison.”
The cool tone, filled with pompous authority, snapped her out of the column of numbers as little else could have. “West. It’s good to hear from you.”
Her dinner at Keira and Nathan’s had served up more than her fill of West Harrison for a while and she’d thought she wouldn’t need to deal with him again until Hawaii.
Clearly she’d been far too optimistic.
“What can I do for you?”
“I think it’s what I can do for you.”
Anger balled in her throat but she kept her tone civil and added a subtle lightness around the edges. “Come now, you know never to tease a CFO like that.”
He didn’t laugh, nor had she expected him to, but his tone softened a notch. “I’m calling about Hawaii.”
“I’m looking forward to it.”
“Our team at the FJ is not like your people at McBride. We’re a financial paper. There’s a gravitas to what we do that you’re likely not used to.”
“We do have a biweekly financial magazine that’s rather hard-hitting, in addition to our newsweekly. Not every property at McBride media is fashion and celebrities.” Even if both industries drive a heck of a lot of big business, she thought, but kept it to herself.
“We’re a daily financial newspaper. The markets look to us as they make decisions. It’s a bit different.”
While she knew West’s modus operandi was to bully and intimidate his opponents, she couldn’t help but question if the reason for his call went deeper. Although her normal reaction would be to simply ignore West, trivializing his need for the call, an image of Booth rose up in her mind’s eye, stopping her.
Booth wasn’t dismissive of her. Nor did he seem to feel his own personal power and success hinged on bringing down others. In fact, despite his willingness to overtly express his interest in her, she felt a true sincerity in him when he’d invited her to speak in Hawaii.
“West, while I respect each business has its unique challenges, the focus of my keynote will be about team-building and about helping each other find success.”
The heavy snort that echoed in her ear told her all she needed to know. “Team-building. We sell papers. To individuals. What the hell do we need a team for?”
“Surely you of all people know the value of making people feel like they’re a cohesive unit, all working together toward the same goal.”
“Touchy-feely bullshit, if you ask me.”
“I’m afraid you’re just going to have to live with it because that’s what I’m focusing on for the talk. You’re taking a significant number of staff members on a rather expensive trip. Surely you hope they come back invigorated to help grow your business.”
“Of course.”
She flirted momentarily with saying nothing further, but the small, impulsive part of herself she kept in check finally broke free. “What’s the real reason for your call? I don’t think it’s to argue the merits of Team-Building 101.”
“What do you and Booth have going on?”
“You mean other than the fact that we now share family members?”
“You can cut the cheek with me. I see how he looks at you, and you’re looking right back.”
She covered the mouthpiece with her hand and let out a hard breath. What in the hell was this about? Composing herself, she kept her tone neutral, unwilling to give a single inch. “Nothing’s going on.”
“I have eyes.”
“So do I and at the moment th
ey’re looking at a rather extensive spreadsheet. One that requires at least three more hours of work before I head home.”
“He’s only invited you because he wants to take this damn flirtation to another level.”
Doubt flooded her system, her mouth going dry at the thought that she was simply a pawn in a carefully orchestrated seduction attempt by Booth Harrison. Was that really the only reason he’d invited her? And had she ignored the signs, allowing flattery at being asked to overwhelm her common sense?
West did have a point. She and Booth did have a flirtation, no matter how much she wanted to think otherwise. And frankly, when the sexy texts were flying, Camryn had to admit to herself she really didn’t want to think otherwise. She wanted to enjoy herself and feel young and carefree and desired. Memories of her and Booth’s lunch with Sinclair floated through her mind’s eyes, snatching on wisps of conversation. You want to inspire them? Tell them how you fought my brother.
She’d seen the very real pride in Booth’s eyes and had felt his approval like a brand.
Camryn let that moment linger, filling her up until it banished the self-doubt West was attempting to pull forward. Booth might want her on a personal level, but the invitation to Hawaii was real. She’d do well to remember that and not give West Harrison the satisfaction of playing his mind games.
“Your son is a grown man who can make his own decisions, so why aren’t you having this discussion with him?”
“Boy’s hardheaded and stubborn. He won’t listen.”
“Yet I’m fair game?” The words lashed out and for the briefest moment she felt like she was talking to her own father. Andrew McBride had spent more than a few conversations over the years attempting to verbally batter her and her sisters into submission around how he thought things should be done.
“I don’t beat around the bush and I tell it like I see it.”
“Maybe you don’t see as much as you think you do.”
“I see damn fine, Camryn McBride.”
“Then believe me when I say my trip to Hawaii has no hidden agenda.”
“If you really believe that then you’re not the coolheaded business woman I took you for.”
“And that’s where we end this conversation.”
“You think so?”
“I know so. I couldn’t care less if you give me any credit for my business skills or what I can bring to the sales conference. But I’d think you’d be willing to give more credit to your son. How sad to find out I was wrong on that score.”
“I give my son plenty of credit.”
“You could have fooled me.”
…
Booth announced himself to the doorman in Camryn’s building. He hadn’t been back since their late-night wine date, but the texting had continued. Messages just sexual enough to ensure she was interested.
If only he could get past the resistance her mind kept putting up. He also couldn’t quite shake the sense that he’d overstepped the other night in her apartment. It wasn’t anything overt, but something had subtly shifted as they drank the wine, and he desperately wanted to make it right.
The doorman had his phone in hand to call Camryn’s apartment when the elevators opened and she stepped off. Booth met her in the lobby and took the handle of her rolling suitcase. “Good morning.”
“Morning.” She was perfectly made-up and her suit was pristine and pressed, but he didn’t miss the husky growl in her voice.
“So this is how pleasant high-powered financial executives are at six a.m.?”
“I am incapable of speech before a cup of coffee, often two. Since I finally went to bed at one a.m., it’s likely going to take three this morning.”
“Will the large latte sitting in the car do the trick?”
Her dark eyes perked up at that and he saw her first tentative smile. “You bet your ass it will.”
“Grumpy with a potty mouth first thing in the morning.” He leaned in and pressed a chaste kiss on her cheek. “I like it.”
She shot him a gimlet eye, but walked through the door her doorman held open without a word. Booth winked at the doorman as he passed behind her and got a broad smile as evidence the man was in on the joke.
He settled behind her in the car as the doorman made quick work of stowing her bags, and then they were off.
“One extra large latte, coming up.”
“Thank you.” Their fingers brushed as she took the cup and Booth enjoyed the light little zing at the contact.
“You’re welcome.” Booth reached for his own coffee, his sole indulgence of the day. A small coffee full of heavy cream and chocolate.
Camryn eyed his small cup. “That’s all you need?”
“It’s all I allow myself. There’s a difference.”
“Coffee’s not bad for you.”
“It is when the only way you can stomach it is with whipped cream and chocolate.”
“Is that why you didn’t have any at Keira and Nathan’s dinner party?”
“You noticed.”
She snapped her mouth closed and turned toward the window. They rode in quiet silence as their driver took them through the early-morning streets of Manhattan. Booth loved this time of day, as the city was waking up. While New York might be the city that never slept, it did slow down overnight. And early morning was the best time to see it spring back to life.
She finally turned away from the view as they crossed the bridge out of the city. “Thanks for indulging me. I’m nearly human now.”
“Clearly the extra shot of espresso did the trick.”
“It never hurts.”
Booth focused on her, the heavy sweep of dark curls that fell over her shoulder catching his eye and making him wish he could reach out and rub one of those curls between his fingers. He already knew they’d be soft and silky. Just like her skin. “Why were you up until one in the morning?”
“Work.”
While he knew the McBride trio had a reputation for being hard, tireless workers, 1:00 a.m. was a bit much to ask of anyone. He couldn’t resist lightly poking her. “You’re the head of the company. Maybe you should do something about those hours.”
“Things needed taking care of.”
“No one you can hand it to?” He kept his question casual, but the answer was suddenly very important to him.
The yawn she was delicately hiding behind her hand ended abruptly. “I had work, Booth. A few things that needed taking care of before I went off for the long weekend.”
“I’m not suggesting otherwise.”
“You’re not?”
“It just seemed a bit excessive. I’d expect you have team members who can give you a hand. Allow you to be gone for a single day without causing a massive crisis.”
He could actually see the responses flit through her mind before she spoke. “I prefer to take care of my responsibilities on my own.”
“Fair enough.”
He wasn’t sure why he was picking a fight with her. Aside from the early hour, he was the reason she was missing a day and he wasn’t likely to win any points baiting her. And certainly not before she’d had her requisite cups of coffee.
Ever the diplomat, she changed the subject as effortlessly as she tossed that luscious mane behind her shoulder. “So tell me a bit about these investors. I reviewed the e-mail you sent me and did a quick review of them online, but would love to get your impressions.”
They spent the remainder of the ride to the airport discussing the various individuals they’d be having dinner with. Booth had found them to be a fair group so far and he was interested in learning more about their ambitions.
He expanded on his e-mail, sharing thoughts and impressions, and was once again impressed by her sharp mind and how agilely she moved through a conversation. From questions on distribution plans, editorial capabilities, and printing and digital expertise, she proved yet again why she had become such a force to be reckoned with in their industry. Camryn McBride was the entire package—a smart and sa
vvy businesswoman who contributed to a discussion with her entire focus.
By the time the driver was lifting their bags from the trunk, Booth had a contact for a printer upstate that could cut his costs by 5 percent a quarter and a lingering question for his lawyer on a deferred annuity program he could consider for his company’s high performers.
Booth extended a hand, allowing her to go first up the steps of the jet’s boarding ladder. “You’re full of ideas. And you were surprised a few weeks ago when I was so willing to share.”
“Ideas are everywhere. Hoarding them doesn’t benefit anyone and it certainly won’t help our industry grow.”
“We’re certainly different from our parents’ generation.” In the moments he’d been able to get his thoughts off his attraction to her, Booth couldn’t ignore how interesting it was that their lives had so many similarities. Children of powerful families. A fierce urge to carve out their own paths and roads to success. And an undying dedication to proving themselves.
Booth saw the tilt of her head and the quick flash of interest that leaped into her gaze. “I guess we are. Maybe we’ve learned from their mistakes.”
“Some of their mistakes, at least.” Although his father’s business practices were legendary, some of West Harrison’s other behaviors had garnered even more attention.
“You’re talking about Nathan?”
He winced a little. “Is it that obvious?”
“More that I know the situation. So much of his adult life has been about proving himself. It’s hard to be the abandoned son, the result of an affair.”
“I won’t argue that and I’ve never walked in Nathan’s shoes, but being the family heir’s not all it’s cracked up to be, either.”
“I’m sorry.”
He shrugged, unsure why he’d even started down that road in the first place. “That’s having West Harrison for a father.”
…
His words hovered between them as she and Booth fastened their seat belts. Camryn hadn’t missed the undisguised regret on Booth’s face, erasing the smooth, easy smile he’d held while flirting with her over coffee and replacing it with hard, stoic lines that bracketed his mouth. She sensed he’d like to take back the words about his father, but she didn’t press the point as their flight attendant entered the cabin to ask if they wanted fresh coffees and breakfast after takeoff.