All a Man Can Be

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All a Man Can Be Page 18

by Virginia Kantra


  Nicole blinked. “I guess. I think it was supposed to prepare me for reading or something. My mother used to take me to the library.”

  “We didn’t do the library. But Tess used to read to me out of this book of Bible stories my mother had around. Anyway—” he dragged in a painful breath “—she used to read me the story of Solomon.”

  Oh, my. Half-remembered images and phrases teased Nicole’s memory: “Let him kiss me with the kisses of his mouth; for thy love is better than wine… A bundle of myrrh is my well-beloved unto me; he shall lie all night betwixt my breasts.”

  Mark stared at the row of bottles. “There was a really cool picture in the book, these two women kneeling at the feet of the old king with this baby, both claiming to be the kid’s mother, right? And this big slave standing there with a sword, which is probably why I liked it.”

  Not the “Song of Solomon,” Nicole realized. The story of the king’s judgment. Sadness clogged her throat.

  “So neither one of the women will give the baby up, and the king says, ‘Cut the baby in two!’, which, when I was like five or something, I thought was great.”

  “Mark—”

  “Almost done. It’s a short story. What I remember, anyway. When the king says that, one of the women says fine, that’s fair. And the other says no, give him to the first woman, it’s okay, just don’t kill the baby. And the king gives the child to the woman who was willing to give him up for his own good, because that proved she was his mother.” Mark picked up the last half-empty bottle and tilted it in salute. “‘The Wisdom of Solomon.’”

  Her heart wrenched. There was more to this story than an ancient king in a picture book.

  “What happened today? Did the lawyer call?”

  “You know, she did. The second set of DNA results came in. There’s a 99.8 percent chance that Danny’s mine.”

  Relief loosened the knot in Nicole’s chest. “Then you have your proof. You don’t need a king’s judgment.”

  Mark set the bottle precisely next to its fellows. “I also got a little visit today from Danny’s grandmother.”

  Oh, dear. Oh, Mark.

  “Are they going to fight you for custody?” Nicole asked.

  “Only if I fight them first. And why should I? They love the kid. He’s known them all his life. They can give him everything he needs.”

  “Except a father. They can’t give him that.”

  Mark met her gaze, an arrested expression in his eyes. And then he picked up the bottle again and drank.

  “Maybe he doesn’t need one,” he said.

  Nicole straightened. “Cut it out. You know better than that. For heaven’s sake, I’ve been trying to win my father’s approval my entire life, and I know better than that.”

  Mark stopped looking dark and brooding and started to look annoyed. A definite improvement, in Nicole’s eyes.

  “Fine. Maybe he needs a father. And maybe he needs somebody better than me.”

  “What’s wrong with you?”

  “For starters, my pop did not exactly stick around long enough to pass on his parenting skills.”

  She waved that away. “Then you didn’t learn bad habits.”

  “I work as a bartender.”

  “As a valued associate in a successful service business,” she corrected.

  He sat back and crossed his arms. “My hours suck.”

  She arched her brows. “I am sure your employer could be persuaded to adjust your work schedule to accommodate a change in your lifestyle.”

  “Look, I appreciate what you’re trying to do here. But what if I’m just not father material? I’m not Jarek, okay?”

  “And what does Jarek have that you don’t have?”

  “A house. A career. A fiancée.”

  Oops. There was no way she was going to touch on his lack of fiancée. And the career thing was problematic, too, since she’d like nothing more than for him to stay on as manager of the Blue Moon. But—

  “You have a Jeep,” she said. “And a boat.”

  “Great. So I can hit the road or sail off into the sunset. Think the kid will want to come along?”

  “I think he’ll want to stay in Eden. I think you do, too, or you would never have come back here. Your roots are here. Your family.”

  “Some family. I never talk to my mother.”

  “Then maybe you should try.”

  “We don’t have anything to say to each other.”

  Nicole wondered if Isadora DeLucca would agree. “How about, ‘I love you’?” she suggested.

  Mark shook his head. “I’m no good at that stuff.”

  He certainly hadn’t said it to her. On the other hand…

  “You’re close to your sister.”

  “My sister is the warm and caring type. My sister could form a close personal relationship with the Grinch.”

  “You’re good with Danny.”

  “Short-term, yeah. One night and one day. That doesn’t mean I have what it takes for the long haul.”

  She didn’t know enough to contradict him. And if he was right, what did that mean for Danny’s future? Or theirs?

  But she said, stubbornly, “You’ll never know unless you try.”

  “Trying and failing could really screw the kid up.”

  “Not trying could hurt him even more. He needs to know you want him.”

  I need to know you want me, she thought but did not say. This wasn’t about her.

  “I want him,” Mark said.

  “Then show him. Fight for him.”

  He watched her over his crossed arms, his black eyes inscrutable. “In court.”

  “If necessary.”

  “And that’s your advice,” he mocked gently. “The big expert on love.”

  She stuck out her chin. “I read a lot of books,” she told him loftily.

  He smiled for the first time that night, lazy and dangerous, and her pulse kicked into high gear.

  “I can show you things that aren’t in those books,” he said.

  “Oh, I don’t know,” she said, amazed when her voice remained steady. “You’d be surprised what gets published these days.”

  His eyes were hot on hers. “So, surprise me.”

  Her breath went. What was left came out in a squeak. “Here?”

  He scraped his chair back from the table, still watching her. “Sure. Unless you think the owner would object.”

  He was asking permission to seduce her?

  No, he was asking her to seduce him. Here, in her bar, with the front door locked and the beer signs flickering on the walls.

  She shivered with doubt and with lust. “Have you ever done this before?”

  “In the bar?” He moved his head once, slowly, side to side. No.

  “Is it—” She hesitated. Clean? Private? Possible? “—safe?”

  “How safe do you need it to be?”

  She swallowed. “I still have a condom in my purse.”

  “You brought your purse downstairs with you?”

  “It has my keys in it. And my mace.”

  His brows jerked together. “You carry mace?”

  Maybe she had succeeded in surprising him after all. “You told me a woman living alone over a bar needed protection.”

  “So you bought mace.”

  She nodded. “And condoms. Well, I didn’t buy those. I took one from Kathy, but—”

  “Go get it.” His voice reached the pit of her stomach.

  “The mace?”

  “The condom.”

  She frowned, uncomfortable with him ordering her. Uncomfortable, period. “And what are you going to do while I do that?”

  “Watch you.”

  Oh.

  He sounded so smug she wanted to hit him. So predatory she wanted to run. And then she looked in his eyes and saw the raw need there, and everything in her was moved and softened toward him.

  She tossed her head, so her hair shimmied on her shoulders.

  “Be my guest,” she said.
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  She sucked in her breath, drawing his attention to her breasts. She turned slowly, and slowly sauntered to the table by the hall where she’d left her purse, feeling his gaze hot and heavy upon her.

  When she walked back, her legs were shaking. But the condom was clutched in her hand, and her back was straight. She stopped in front of him, so close her knees brushed his thighs as he slouched in the chair.

  She touched the tip of her tongue to her dry lips. “Now what?”

  “Whatever you want,” he said hoarsely.

  She wanted to make him see himself as she saw him.

  She wanted to feel she could comfort him, to explore the extent of her feminine power.

  She wanted to love him.

  “I want you,” she told him, claiming him as he had once claimed her, and undid the top button of her blouse.

  If she wanted him to, he would beg.

  If she wanted him to, he would do, say, be anything for her.

  As long as she didn’t stop.

  She undid all the buttons of her blouse and then the zipper of her slacks, letting them slide to her ankles. He watched her step out of them, trying to figure how he had reached this point with her but not much caring. He was too grateful.

  And when she unclasped her bra and spilled her panties down her long, smooth legs, he was too stunned.

  In the dim room, she burned like a candle, pure and straight and white. She stood so close he could smell her fragrance, could see the fine down on her thighs and the slope of her belly. His heart hammered.

  She rested her arms on his shoulders. The curve of her breast brushed the side of his jaw. He turned his head to take her nipple, but she was already climbing, moving, straddling his lap, and his mouth found her throat instead.

  She raised his face between her hands and kissed him, long and sweetly. Balancing herself with one hand on his shoulder and one foot on the floor, she tugged and shoved his jeans from his hips.

  It was awkward. Arousing. Incredible.

  Before he could decide how he should play this, before he could pull his mind back to the place where he could please her and protect himself, she took him inside her. The shock stopped his breath. She wrapped him in her arms and rode him, and took all his troubles away.

  Chapter 16

  Nicole had been watching out the window all day, like a ten-year-old with an eye out for the boy down the street, like an elderly woman on the lookout for prowlers. When the Jeep finally pulled in front of the Blue Moon, she felt giddy with relief and apprehension.

  Mark got out, still wearing the blazer and tie he’d put on that morning to go to court. His sister Tess climbed down from the passenger seat before he could go around to open her door.

  Nicole couldn’t read Mark’s expression, but his sister was smiling.

  Please, Nicole thought. Oh, please.

  But no one else got out of the car.

  Her heart contracted, but she pinned a smile to her face and hurried out the entrance to greet them. “How did it go?”

  Brother and sister exchanged glances, not speaking, and then Tess said brightly, “It went well.”

  Nicole didn’t believe her, but that didn’t matter.

  I want that, she thought. I want that connection, that closeness, want to look at him and know what he is thinking and what I should say.

  Of course, Tess had an edge here. She’d known Mark longer. Twenty-seven years longer. But she was his sister and she was getting married soon.

  “Did Jarek go with you?” Nicole asked.

  “He drove down in his own car,” Tess explained. “In case he had to leave early. But he hooked Mark up with a really good lawyer.”

  Nicole met Mark’s eyes. “How good?”

  He smiled finally, holding her gaze, and even though she suspected he was still holding out on her, she started to feel better.

  “Good enough,” he said. “Daniel’s coming to live with me.”

  She beamed. “That’s wonderful.”

  “Yeah.” He tugged at his tie. “It is.”

  “So…where is he?”

  “He went home with his grandparents. To say goodbye and pack a bag. Wainscott’s bringing him up tonight, and I’ll go down next week to get the rest of his stuff.”

  It all sounded right. So why did she get the sense that something was subtly wrong?

  Tess fingered her purse strap. “I should get going. They’re expecting me at the paper. Give me a lift?” she asked her brother.

  “Sure. Get in the car.”

  Tess rolled her eyes. “You could at least pretend you weren’t in a hurry to get rid of me.” She seized Nicole’s hand and pressed her warm cheek to Nicole’s cool one. Surprised and touched by the embrace, Nicole squeezed back.

  Tess released her and jerked open the Jeep’s door. “Take care. I’ll see you at the wedding.”

  “At the…”

  “You did tell her,” Tess said to her brother.

  “I was going to.”

  “Mark, my wedding is in three days. She needs time to pick out a dress.”

  “She’s not the one getting married.”

  “You are so clueless,” Tess said. She turned back to Nicole. “Saturday at eleven o’clock. St. Raphael’s. Jarek and I want you to come.”

  My sister is the warm and caring type. My sister could form a close personal relationship with the Grinch.

  Nicole was powerless to resist. “I’d love to come.”

  “Good,” Tess said, and got into the car.

  Mark raised his eyebrows. “Pizza at seven. My place. Danny and I want you to come.”

  “Oh, I couldn’t,” Nicole said instinctively.

  “Why not?”

  “I can’t intrude on your first night.”

  “You’re not intruding.”

  Maybe it was a family thing. Maybe—

  “Will your sister be there?”

  “Nope. Just the three of us.”

  Us. The three of us. Her heart thudded with possibility.

  “It’s no big deal,” Mark said, and her pulse steadied. “You don’t even have to buy a dress. Come naked, if you want.”

  Nicole ignored the dark little thrill that ran through her at his words. “Now that would be really inappropriate.”

  “Forget appropriate. Will you come?”

  He grinned at her, dark and charming as his sister and just as irresistible. More irresistible, if you were female and breathing.

  “Seven o’clock,” she promised weakly.

  “What did she say?” Tess demanded.

  Mark reversed out of his parking space. “About what?”

  He watched in his rearview mirror as Nicole went into the Blue Moon without looking back. He told himself that was okay. It was starting to rain. Why should she get wet?

  “About dinner. Is she joining you?”

  “Yes.”

  “Well, that’s good.” When he didn’t say anything, Tess stole a look in his direction. “That is good, isn’t it?”

  “What is this, you’re getting married, so now the rest of the world has to line up two by two, like the animals on Noah’s ark?”

  “I’m happy. I want my only brother to be happy, too.”

  “Fine. Don’t push me.”

  Tess grinned. “How about a little nudge?”

  “No pushing. No nudging. She’s not ready.”

  “Ready for what?”

  Mark regarded his sister with exasperated affection. “You don’t give up, do you?”

  “Nope. It’s a large part of my charm. Ask Jarek.”

  “I’ll pass, thanks.” He didn’t want to think too closely about what drew the cool, in-control police chief and his hot, volatile sister together.

  “Ready for what?” Tess repeated.

  He flipped on his wiper blades. Anybody else he would have kicked out of the car. With Tess he tried to explain. “Look, I’m still easing into this thing with Danny myself.”

  “You mean, fatherhood?”
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  “Yeah. I don’t want Nicole thinking I just want her as some kind of surrogate mother.”

  Tess shook her head. “She can’t think that. I’ve seen the way you look at her. Unless you spend all your time together talking about child development theories or something.”

  He’d spent all of the past week that hadn’t been taken up with Jarek’s fancy lawyer trying to figure ways to get Nicole alone and naked. But he wasn’t telling his sister that.

  “Mostly we talk about the bar,” he said.

  “There you go, then,” Tess said with satisfaction. “Common interests. That’s good.”

  “Not if she thinks I’m more interested in real estate than in her.”

  “Why would she think that?”

  The memory of his own words haunted him, punctuated by the swish-click of the wiper blades. You think I’m screwing you for the bar? Babe, for that I’d have to marry you.

  And so he couldn’t ask her to marry him.

  Not for a long time.

  “I’m just saying I don’t want to rush her, that’s all.”

  “You don’t ask, you don’t get,” Tess observed.

  “You don’t ask, you don’t get stomped on, either.”

  “If she stomps on you, I’ll pull her hair.”

  He slanted her a look. “Leave it alone, Tess. I’m a big boy now.”

  “Oh, sure. Couple of grown-ups, that’s us.” She shook her head. “Who’d have thought a year ago we’d both wind up married with kids?”

  He winced. “Aren’t you getting a little ahead of yourself?”

  “You don’t want to marry her?”

  A month ago he would have said no. But after three weeks of Nicole Reed, with her big ideas and her big blue eyes and her heart as open as a target on a firing range, he wanted…all kinds of things he couldn’t have.

  “I haven’t asked her. Anyway, you’re not married yet, either.”

  “Three days,” Tess said. She scowled through the windshield. “And it better not rain.”

  She sounded so tragic, he smiled. “Jarek’s not going to call off the wedding because of a little rain.”

  “It’s not a little rain. The lake level’s two feet above average. There are flood alerts upriver. City crews in Fox Hole are filling sandbags.”

  “Don’t sweat it,” he said. “Haven’t you heard the forecast?”

 

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