Mordon had gone very still and rigid. The radical change in topic left me struggling to keep up. “Say that again, but slower, and intended for the newcomer that I am.”
Denise tugged on her hair. “Augghh! That brood-ring on your hand is meant to match you with the heir to Kragdomen. In another family, it would be for the eldest child. Yes?”
“Alright.”
“We all assumed it was Mordon because at the time, Caledon was gone.”
“Am I to gather from the context that Caledon is Mordon's older brother?”
“Yes.”
From the protracted awkward pause, nobody was going to fill me in on the details. Things like why no one spoke of Caledon, for one. Or where he had gone, for another. Or why they’d basically pretended that he didn’t exist.
I considered what she'd said. “But the ring loosened up and fell off after I had been with Mordon. It has to mean him.”
“Who says so, you? Him? Were any other colony members there to see it happen?”
Simple enough. I reached to take the ring off. The golden dragon sank her teeth into my skin, her tail wrapped tightly about my finger. “Okay,” I said, “it's stuck again. Hmm.”
“That's because now that Caledon is here, there's a contest and you are one way that contest can end,” Denise said. At my shrug, she added, “You can't go mate with him now, it won't be official, and the brothers will definitely have to fight to work out who runs Kragdomen and who gets banished.”
“So what's my role in this? I won't be a prize.”
“No, love,” Mordon said. “It is not for you to interfere. That is assuming he has come to take the colony. We do not know why he has returned.”
He was lying. I saw it on his face, I saw it on Denise's. If not lying, then he wasn't telling the whole truth.
Mordon said, “I need to see him. Do you wish to accompany me?”
“Today has been such a long day,” I grumbled and took his outstretched hand, irate that he hadn't been as honest with me as he usually was.
Chapter Ten
Noise filled the mead hall. Someone was whistling away on panpipes, accompanied by a giant steel drum. People talked over one another, their words a muddle of excitement, confusion, and anger. It smelled of the spiced, roasted nuts customarily served after a meal.
At the center of the commotion was a blue-eyed hunk who could have been Mr. July in a Hot Fireman charity calendar. During one of our conversations, Lilly had called Mordon “funny-looking”; she would have called his brother a bonafide dreamboat and fallen in love at first sight. There were a few similarities between the brothers. A moderately strong jaw, the set of their shoulders, the color of their hair.
Upon seeing Mordon, he stood up and slammed the palms of his hands on the table several times, effectively silencing those nearby. “Little brother, join me.”
Mordon clasped hands with him. “Caledon. It has been some years.”
“A little over ten, I do believe. I heard that you found a beautiful little wind drake.” Caledon's eyes did not meet mine, but they did meet every other part of my body as he continued, “I see the reports are true. Delighted to meet you, Fera.”
“The pleasure is all yours.”
Mordon raised an eyebrow at me, but I couldn't tell what message he was trying to communicate.
In any case, my less-than-enthusiastic greetings went completely unnoticed by Caledon. He shoved a stack of mugs out of the way and said, “Take a seat.”
“I'd prefer to sit next to Mordon.”
This time, the eyebrow-raise came from Caledon, an exact match to the expression I earned so often from Mordon. Caledon said, “Fera, you should not pick favorites before you know your options. In this case, it's me.”
A murmur of agreement stirred amongst those closest to us, including a trio of young women who whooped and whistled their affirmation. My cheeks heated.
Caledon took me by the hand, stroking my palm from wrist to fingertip. “The whole colony is talking. It is not right for a female to fly with one male exclusively. She makes her choice too quickly, discovers later her fallacy.”
“I have met enough men in my life, thank you.”
“But you have never met me. I'll be the best lover you ever had. Sit beside me, have a mead or three. You need to loosen up. You're wound up so tight, woman.”
I was already not loving it, but I didn't know how to respond when I was trying to blend in with the colony. “Perhaps another time.”
“Now, you must join us. It's my first night home and Mordon would be very sad to not have you here to show off.”
I hesitated. Leaving Mordon alone with him may lead to a challenge at this moment rather than later.
“Sit between us, then, and we can all be happy. You do want us to be happy? It is such a small thing, to have a drink with me for family peace.”
Amidst whispers and too loud giggles, I sank into place between the two brothers. Caledon snapped his fingers impatiently, and promptly a mug clunked into place before me. I sipped at it. Strong stuff, about the same as watered wine, and there was more than a pint's worth of it. Mordon stood to get his own, and was met partway by someone.
Caledon took my hand, startling me. He said, “I bet I can tell what you do often.”
“Or you could ask.”
“Do you take amusement out of everything? No, I see callouses from handwriting, and pocks from boiling heavy liquids, as well as cracks from washing your hands often. You are a potion maker, and you record all of your brilliant successes in a special book. Tell me I am right.”
A doe-eyed, buxom brunette said in exasperation, “She's a Swift, Callie, just because she does potions doesn't make her so special.”
Caledon scoffed. “Being a Swift makes her even more so, you plain-nosed dog. Do you know how valuable their services are? Having a beautiful, intelligent, successful Swift leading this colony will do great things. It will lead us into a great future, a strong one, one better than any you could imagine.”
I asked, “Is that what you've been doing? Building a great future by abandoning your responsibilities here?”
“Fera,” whispered Mordon in warning.
I shot him an acidic glare.
Caledon said, “That's a terrible way to start a conversation. I think my worldly experiences are a fantastic thing for this colony.” Louder. “I've been out in the world, I've seen the world. I've done very well in it.” To the crowd. “And I envision the future of this colony doing very well—better than that—I see it as a powerhouse in a world of weak, divided nations. We need to build ourselves up from within.”
People thumped fists against tables, feeding Caledon.
“Let's stop sending our children away for two unproductive years—years where they face hardship and discrimination. We need to keep them safe and teach them the value of hard work and dedication.”
More whistles and thumps.
“I feel like I'm on a campaign trail,” I said.
Mordon shook his head. “Don't antagonize him. The others are drunk. The best we can do is ignore him and turn a deaf ear.”
I wondered if this was how it had always been between them. One brother glorifying in feeding the fire, the other one quietly putting it out behind him.
“So it's all great that you got worldly experience, but you don't think anyone else should,” I said.
Caledon brushed the comment away. “I am here to teach. Why make them learn the same thing the hard way when I already know?”
“You're afraid someone will come along and challenge you. You want a swarm of ignorant yes-men who will wait on you hand and foot.”
He flung out his hand in a motion I thought was going to knock over his beer. “Listen to you, spewing nonsense. You're a beautiful woman, a brilliant woman, but you've been brainwashed listening to the weeping-hearted idealists. Wake up to reality. These people aren't dumb. They're very smart. Not to be harsh, but you need to fill your mind with knowledge. Not this foo
fery. That will never work.”
My nostrils flared; I tried to rein in my anger. “Listen to you. You can't even hold a legitimate conversation without resorting to personal attacks, never minding confusing ignorance with intelligence. You duck and dodge explanations. You run at the slightest hint that you've done despicable things.”
Caledon laughed. “Are you hearing this? I'm hearing this. A right viper we have here. She'll be a boon to my children once she's been properly educated, cleaned up, and dressed nicely. This will be good, very good. Can you imagine all the great things she'll do for our colony?”
The response was enthusiastic. Caledon gloated in it and continued, “Yes, we will tame this wildcat, that will be my first great triumph. Once I show her that happiness lies in good service, that honor is in modesty, and joy in following the right leadership—once she knows this, we will have a Lady to be proud of.”
I stood up, drawing whistles. I said, “The colony will thrive. I see it as the heart of art, culture, and prosperity. I see it as a home where people do good, honest work, where they stand up for their families and each other. Where they believe in what is right. Where they support one another through thick and thin, and the heart of the people will never surrender. I see a colony bursting with opportunity, a place for children to grow into educated, informed shapers of tomorrow. Where we do not worry after our health or station or fear for our lives. We will be strong and the world will know our name. Are you with me?” There was a decent cheer, but we could do better. “I said, are you with me?”
A loud cheer this time, with everyone echoing it. I waved it into silence. Caledon was puffed up so full of pride, I wished I had a needle to pop him with.
I said, “This world can never come to be if it is guided by a man who deserted you for eleven years. For eleven years, he's been serving himself with no thought for you. And now, he comes here, and instead of asking how he can make amends, he snaps his fingers and commands you to wait on his every whim. You praise him for this self-absorbed, narcissistic, vile behavior. I am ashamed.”
A few people went completely quiet, but the majority were simply confused. A couple others shook their heads at how wrong I was.
Caledon scoffed again. “Would you believe this? Incredible. Just incredible. Mordon, you've done a number on a beautiful, smart girl. It's despicable.”
I rounded on him. “You're despicable. You seek to conquer, humiliate, and indulge in your own vises. A world as I envision requires a nurturer, firm and accepting. A man who challenges and rewards. A man who will grow a family, not bully it into submission. When you first came, I thought you may not be so terrible. Then I heard you speak.”
I chose to walk away. I'd been around his type before. They'd argue to the day's end, they'd concede nothing. They were all voice and no ears.
Caledon called behind me, “Fine woman. Do you see those legs? What a great mother-to-be. She'll serve me well, just you watch. She'll be on her knees.”
Mordon spoke, “Once again, I am very grateful to have an entirely different opinion than you.”
Caledon said, “Speak plainly, my brother.”
“Do long sentences still confuse you? Very well. Feraline does not need to come around. She is already there.”
Chapter Eleven
“I hate him.”
Mordon laughed at my moody proclamation. We laid together on my guest bed in the east wing of the castle. My shaking rage had died to a steady, silent loathing in the night.
The trembles of the bed from Mordon’s laughter made me feel all the more outraged. I’d told him some of the trouble I’d had in the past with people who tried to bully me, but I hadn’t expressed how deeply I hated anything that reminded me of those times. One day, I could very well let those feelings bubble over, but not tonight. Tonight, I wanted to clear my mind enough to think.
“He always was one to stir up passions,” Mordon said. “Do not worry, he will be gone again after he is tired of playing king.”
“But what damage will he do in the meantime?”
“He'll ruffle up scales. They'll smooth out again.”
“Isn't there a way you can kick his ass?”
“Confident in me? You shouldn't underestimate Caledon. He could not have gone this far with that mouth unless he was capable of winning duels often.”
Mordon propped himself up onto his elbow. He leaned against the wall, and started to trail a finger lightly across my arm. Despite my frustrations, I began to feel calmer. I shivered so all the small hairs stood up across my entire body.
Mordon removed his hand to stroke his chin. “I fear he and I possess opposing skill sets.”
That was a dramatic understatement. Did Mordon know how very different the two of them were? Probably. But that didn’t mean that he understood how good of a man he truly was. The words for Mordon stuck in my throat. All I could say was, “He has no respect for me.”
Unlike you.
If I had one thing to thank Caledon for, it was for showing me how lucky I’d been to find Mordon and have him love me in return.
Mordon shrugged. “Do not be so certain. He spoke very highly of you.”
“No, he spoke very highly of my body—and then of his own ability to tame me. There was no respect involved in a thing that he said.”
“True.” Mordon held me a little tighter. “I regret that I let you speak out against him alone. I have been thinking ever since, wondering what I could have said. All my ideas would have been counter-productive.”
“Silence is worse. It implies that you agree.”
“What would you have me do? Tell him to be quiet? Supposing that he does, he becomes a voice for those who wish they have the nerve to speak ill against me.”
“No, I'd have you make sure everyone knows Kragdomen will not tolerate talk of removing freedom from its people.”
“When did he say that?”
“It was between the lines, when he was talking about keeping the youth home where they were safe. That's inhibiting the ability to choose where to go and what risks they are willing to take. There's a reason the Colony sends their youth out into the bigger world. If Caledon is challenging that reason, you should provide an answer. Remind everyone of why it is how it is.” I sighed and felt suddenly very tired. “I'm not sure that's enough. He's promising them a perfect world, and you need to combat it with your own vision—a vision and a plan. Caledon is great at making promises, but you're great at following through on them.”
“You sound worn out.”
“I am.”
“You should get some rest.”
“I'd love to. My brain won't let me. I'm worried what will happen if I end up with him somehow. It's certainly what he wants.”
“You won't.”
“You're right. I think a dozen nightshade berries hidden in a blueberry pie should do the trick. Then if you're not dead, I can find you and bring you back to the colony.”
Mordon chuckled. “You would, wouldn't you?”
“I despise him.”
“The rumors would take off if you did that, you know.”
“Why bother? Everyone should know by now I love you and hate him.”
“It nevertheless remains advisable to not murder my brother. He is my brother. He does have redeeming qualities.”
“Sure. He's popular, dramatic, vulgar, and he can apparently fight well. Or am I forgetting nostalgic times?”
“You are forgetting that he can and does make the best of situations. He's very convincing. And he is rather clever. Some people think he is a breath of fresh air, being willing to speak the truth as he does.”
“I think he's a liar, a manipulator, and a demagogue.”
Mordon laughed, finally relaxing alongside me. “I love having you. You can think for yourself. You'll make a wonderful mate.”
A pause.
“Mordon?”
“Hmm?”
“What's going to happen?”
“Nothing yet. We will spea
k to the Elders in the morning. Chances are, Caledon was just airing some lofty ideas tonight that will be stale come noon tomorrow.”
“You really think so?”
“Yes.”
I sat in the darkness, not satisfied. “Nothing is going to happen to you, is it?”
No reply came from him.
Just the shallow breathing of sleep.
I poked him awake again.
“What?” he asked, grouchy.
“I said, we'll make sure you're safe, right?”
“We'll ask in the morning. The Elders. What we can do...”
This time, I let him sleep.
Being awake at night when others were asleep was an exquisite torture all to itself. Beautiful, lonely, irritating. Every sound amplified—the half-snores of the man beside me, the creek as it rolled down the hillsides, the step-step-step of a night-guard making his rounds on the castle wall. My throat itched, not enough for a genuine complaint, but enough to notice as the night-guard’s feet stopped and I smelled—or thought I smelled—the acidic tang of smokeweed irritating my nose. I scratched a nostril, rubbed an eye, tried sleeping on my side, tried to forget all that had happened and all that may come to be.
Boredom soon got the better of me, though. Laying there, too restless to sleep, mind too busy to calm down.
I noticed a faint, glowing light from the bottle. The words Drink Me were what was causing the illumination. Slowly, I eased the cork out of the bottle and dumped out the parchment. Faintly, I made out the message.
Leif wrote,
Reviewing discrimination laws and security regs. For special project. Will do all I can. Sit Tight. -L.
In the context of our last conversation, I understood that he must be working on a project to get into Cole’s inner confidences. But what an odd project. Discrimination and security. For a minute, I was puzzled why Cole would even bother to understand the law when he could break it easier.
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