It was a promise he’d made to himself five years earlier. The day he lost his wife. The day he’d walked away from the hospital without her and realised he would never again hold her in his arms or wake next to her in the bed they had shared. He’d vowed that day that he would dedicate his life to being the kind of father to their son that Natasha would have wanted.
And he would never wake with another woman in his arms.
He had been true to both promises.
Oddly, sitting with Phoebe, he felt almost comfortable, more at ease than in a long time, and he suspected their mutual professional interests had a lot to do with that. He couldn’t remember the last time he had spoken in depth to a woman about his chosen career and engaged in a meaningful conversation. He had taken lovers over the years, but nothing more than a shared night. He left before dawn, and conversation was at the bottom of the list of his needs on those occasions.
‘I’d better let you go and I’ll head back to the practice and sort out the air-con, or we’ll have melted patients for the next few months,’ Heath told her in a matter-of-fact tone as he stood. ‘It’s only December, and both January and February are hotter months in general.’
Phoebe was taken aback by the way Heath ended their time together. He had invited her to go for a drink and now he was excusing himself quite abruptly. Not that she minded at all. In fact she was relieved, as it gave him no further opportunity to quiz her about her personal life.
‘You mean hotter than this?’ Phoebe asked.
‘Not hotter, but hot for longer stretches.’
Phoebe shrugged. ‘Well, then, I really hope you get the air-conditioner working.’
He paid the tab and walked Phoebe to the door and then out into the street. His body language was stiff and distant again. Any hint of being relaxed had evaporated.
‘I’ll see you in a few days. Take some downtime to recover from your trip and I’ll see you on Thursday morning at eight. If you get a chance, try to head to the beach or a pool. It will do you the world of good.’
Phoebe nodded. ‘Okay, thanks—maybe I will.’ She walked away, then suddenly turned around and called out. ‘Heath, we never discussed Thursday’s patients.’
Heath turned back and looked at Phoebe for the longest moment, then glanced at the laptop tucked loosely under his arm. ‘We didn’t, didn’t we?’
CHAPTER FOUR
‘DADDY!’
Heath was welcomed home by tiny arms that wrapped around his knees and hugged him ferociously. He bent down and returned the hug before he picked up his son in his strong arms and swung him around like a carousel ride. Oscar was his reason for living. He had been the beacon of hope during his darkest days. Heath would never let Oscar down. No matter what the future held, he would be his son’s anchor through life. He was the only thing that brought a smile to Heath’s face and love to an otherwise broken heart.
‘How’s my favourite little man?’ he asked, kissing his tiny son’s chubby cheek.
‘I’m good, Daddy.’
Heath lowered him to the ground, then sat on the sofa. Oscar climbed up next to him.
‘Can we go to the pool tomorrow—can we, please?’
Heath considered his son for a moment. He had his mother’s deep brown eyes and he was the apple of his father’s. There was nothing Heath wouldn’t do for him, but he did like to have fun and tease him a little sometimes.
‘I thought you hated the pool? You distinctly told me the other day that you never, ever wanted to go swimming again. You said that you would rather eat live worms than go to a swimming pool!’
‘Don’t be silly, Daddy. I loooooove the pool!’
Heath picked Oscar up and put him on his lap and held him tightly. ‘Then it looks like tomorrow we’re off to the pool, my little man.’
* * *
Phoebe enjoyed a lazy sleep-in the next day. It would end, she knew, when the air-conditioning at the practice was repaired, so she made the most of it. Then she had a quick shower, put on shorts, sandals and a T-shirt, and went out to buy a newspaper. While she enjoyed a light breakfast she planned on reading local stories of interest and about the issues affecting the town she would call home for the near future.
When she arrived home there was a delivery man on her doorstep, holding a medium-sized box, which she signed for and carried into the kitchen.
She discovered it was filled with Christmas gifts. All wrapped in colourful paper and equally pretty ribbons. And every one had her name on it.
She rang her father, but it went to voicemail. ‘Hi, Dad. I know you’re probably busy, but thank you so much for my gifts. By the way, how did you get the presents here the very day after I arrived?’
A few minutes later, as she was putting the presents away in her wardrobe, she received a text message.
I posted them a week before you left. Hope you like them. PS I would have been in trouble if you’d cancelled the trip! Xxx
Although she would miss her family, knowing they were only a call or a text away made her feel less lonely.
After breakfast and a thorough read of the newspaper, in a small cobblestoned patio area that had an outdoor table setting for two under a pergola covered in grape vines, Phoebe felt even more positive about her temporary stay in Australia. She was actually enjoying this time to herself, and she decided after completing the crossword and finishing her freshly squeezed orange juice that Heath’s suggestion of spending some time swimming wouldn’t be so bad.
She could do with some sun. A long, relaxing swim at the beach or in a pool was just what the doctor ordered. With no preference, but also no idea where to go, she looked up some local beaches and public pools on the internet.
The beach, she discovered, would mean a thirty-minute tram trip to Glenelg, or there was a pool about a ten-minute cab ride away in Burnside. She opted for the pool.
Searching in her suitcase, she found her floral bikini, sarong and sunblock. She slipped on the bikini, stepped into her denim shorts and popped a white T-shirt over the top. Then, with a good book, a towel, a wide-brimmed hat and a bottle of water in her beach bag, she called for a cab.
* * *
Phoebe had found a perfect spot on the lawn area, adjacent to a huge shade cloth and overlooking the pool. She surmised the sun would get intense later, and she would shift into the shade, but she wanted to enjoy a few minutes of the warm rays and assist her vitamin D intake.
The pool was picturesque, with huge gum trees and parklands surrounding the fenced area. There were quite a few families and some small groups of young mothers with babies enjoying the peaceful ambience of the late morning. Children were laughing and splashing in the crystal water of the wading pool and more serious swimmers were head down, doing lengths of the main pool.
Phoebe had spread out her large blue towel and set up camp. She had spied the fruit in the refrigerator before she’d left home, so she had packed an apple and some strawberries in with her water. Slipping out of her shorts and T-shirt, and putting her hair up atop her head, she strode across the lawn and climbed into the water for a long, relaxing swim.
She was right—it was just what the doctor had ordered. Quite literally.
She lay on her back, lapping the pool slowly and looking up at the stunning blue sky through the filter of her sunglasses. Her worries seemed to dissipate—not completely, but more than she had imagined they would when she had alighted from the plane just a day earlier.
Fifteen minutes later she climbed from the pool and dried herself off with her sun-warmed towel before she spread it out and sat down. With her sarong beside her, in case she needed to cover up, she put on her floppy straw hat, pulled out her book and flipped the lid on her sunblock. She thought of how if she was back in Washington she would be trying to get the ice off her windscreen—instead she was about to cover her
self in sunscreen. Perhaps there was justice in the world—or at least a little compensation in the form of sunshine.
She poured a little lotion into her palm and began to rub it over her shoulders.
‘Phoebe?’
Phoebe spun around to see Heath standing so tall he was blocking the sun. His chest was bare and his low-slung black swimming trunks left little to her imagination. Beside him was the cutest little boy, with the same blond tousled hair, dinosaur-patterned swim trunks, and a very cheeky smile. But very different eyes. While Heath’s were the most vivid blue, his son’s huge, twinkling eyes were a stunning deep brown.
‘Hello, Heath,’ she managed, a little shocked to find him in front of her, and a little more shocked by how gorgeous he looked in even less clothing than the day before.
‘I didn’t expect to see you here. I didn’t think you’d actually take my advice about getting some sun and a swim.’
‘It sounded like a good idea,’ she replied, trying not to show how embarrassed she felt in choosing the same outdoor pool as Heath. He had described the city as a large country town, but now she wondered how small Adelaide was to have found them in the same place. ‘And I do need to get some vitamin D.’
As she said it Phoebe realised she was wearing only a string bikini, and suddenly felt very self-conscious. She hadn’t thought twice about it with the other pool guests, as she didn’t know them, but for some reason she felt more exposed in front of Heath. She wanted to reach for her sarong and bring it up to her neck, but realised how silly she would appear.
Heath sensed that Phoebe was feeling awkward in that very brief and very stunning bikini. He had witnessed her discomfiture the previous day, when she had been so intent on tugging her skirt into place. But suddenly his eyes just naturally began to roam her body. Every curve was perfect, he thought, before he quickly slipped on his sunglasses, then turned his attention back to his son. Where it had to stay.
‘Oscar.’ Heath began ruffling the little boy’s hair with his hand. ‘This is Phoebe—she’ll be working with me for the next month, while Grandpa gets better.’
‘Hello, Phoebe,’ the little boy responded. ‘You’re pretty—like Aunty Tilly.’
Phoebe felt herself blush. ‘Thank you, Oscar, that is a very nice thing to say.’
‘It’s the truth,’ he replied. ‘My kindy teacher isn’t as pretty as you, but she can sing really well. Can you sing?’
‘No, I’m afraid I can’t.’
‘That’s okay. Don’t feel bad. My grandpa can’t sing either—he tries in the shower, but it sounds terrible and the dog next door barks. He barks a lot. I don’t know if Daddy can sing. I’ve never heard him try to sing. Even when there’s Christmas carols he never sings along.’
‘That’s because my voice is worse than Grandpa’s,’ Heath added, knowing his inability to sing Christmas carols had nothing to do with the quality of his voice. There was much more to it than that. ‘It’s best I don’t try or the dog next door might run away.’
‘You’re silly, Daddy. The dog can’t open the gate.’
Phoebe smiled at their happy banter. It was the first time she had seen a full smile from Heath. The other time there had been only the hint of a smile. She thought he should do it more often.
‘Can I go in the pool now? Can I? Can I? Please, Daddy?’ Oscar’s words became faster and louder as they came rushing out.
‘Sure can.’ Heath said, eager to move away from Phoebe in her skimpy bathing suit. ‘I hope you enjoy your time here today, Phoebe,’ he added before he took his son’s hand. ‘If you need anything we’re not too far away.’
‘Thanks, I’m sure I will be just fine.’
Heath positioned his sunglasses on the top of his head, nodded in Phoebe’s direction and then reached for his son’s hand and walked towards the water’s edge.
Phoebe suddenly felt a little shiver run all over her body. She ignored it. She had no intention of asking Heath for anything or paying any attention to her body’s inappropriate reaction to her boss. It was her hormones, simply out of sorts after the emotional rollercoaster of the last few months, she decided. Perhaps jet-lag was playing a part too.
She had worked with some very attractive medics over the years and he was just another one—nothing more, she thought as she reached for her book. Once Heath Rollins exited from the practice she would never see him again. And that was how she wanted her life to remain. No men and all about her career.
* * *
Heath loved being with his son. He always gave him one hundred per cent of his attention when they were together. Oscar was his reason for getting up every day, although he never let the little boy feel that pressure or carry that load. He didn’t want his family to attempt to change that dynamic or to question his reasons for still being alone five years after Natasha’s death. His choices were no one else’s business. He would cover for his father at the practice and then return to Sydney, where he and Oscar would live life the way he wanted. With no interference or futile attempts at matchmaking.
Heath knew that no woman would ever replace Natasha. And, even more than that, he thought every day of how Natasha had been denied the joy of watching her child grow into a man. Some days were harder than others. The sadness, the guilt, the emptiness... Aside from Oscar, Heath’s work was his saviour. It was a distraction that gave him purpose.
But today he felt as if someone else was pulling his thoughts away momentarily. Someone who was not only academically and professionally astute, and beautiful from head to toe, but whose humility appeared genuine. But, he reminded himself as he took Oscar to the bigger pool for a father-son swimming lesson, he barely knew her and he was happy with his life just the way it was. He had Oscar and he had his career and that had been enough for him for five years.
He slipped small brightly coloured goggles over his son’s eyes and held him securely, encouraging him to take big strokes and put his head under the water, and he didn’t look back in Phoebe’s direction. Not once.
* * *
Despite her best efforts, Phoebe couldn’t concentrate on her book. Initially she thought it was tiredness that made her read and reread the same sentence until there was no point continuing. But then she realised it was curiosity, or something like it, that drew her to glance back at Heath and his son. Through her sunglasses Phoebe could see how the two were incredibly close, and the love between them was palpable. Heath looked to be the perfect father, and watching them made Phoebe smile just a little.
She had never thought too much about having children. She’d assumed she would, and had looked forward to being a mother one day, but it hadn’t been a driving force in her life. Unlike some of her friends, who had set a date by which they wanted to have the picket fence and three children, Phoebe liked to live her life as it unfolded and had never been one to over-plan. She had spent so long studying, achieving her career goals through long hours at the hospital and in surgery, and then she had got caught up in the wedding...
She blinked away memories that needed to be forgotten and decided, sitting on her damp towel in the sticky heat and looking up at the towering gum trees, that this would be the day she packed them away for good. The pain, the disappointment and the humiliation had no place in her life. She didn’t know what did have a place exactly, but the sadness seemed to be fading in the warmth of the Australian sun and Phoebe finally felt good about life. Three months in the same cold town hadn’t helped, but the distance and the glorious summer weather appeared to be working. Her decision to set sail was one she felt a little surer she would not regret.
With her mind wandering, she hadn’t noticed the two handsome men walking towards her. Both dripping wet, they stood at the bottom of her towel and she came back to the present with a jolt. But a very pleasant one.
‘I hope we didn’t scare you. You looked like you were a million
miles away.’
‘About ten thousand, to be exact.’
‘You’re homesick for Washington already?’ Heath asked, almost hoping she would confirm his thoughts and tell him she was planning on returning immediately to the US. That would be fortuitous news for him, because he had a gut feeling that Phoebe’s presence might bring complications into his otherwise contained life.
‘Not at all,’ she replied honestly and, being completely clueless to his hopes, she had lightness in her voice. ‘I was just thinking about how lucky I am to be melting rather than freezing.’
‘If you were a chocolate bar you wouldn’t say that!’ Oscar told her with a big smile, before he scampered back to the wading pool and signalled to his father to follow.
Phoebe watched Oscar run in and out of the pool for the best part of an hour, and she found it difficult not to occasionally look at Heath, who stood watch over his son. She walked to the far end of the pool, as she didn’t want to infringe on Heath and Oscar’s time together. He was a single father, who no doubt worked long hours like most medical professionals, so their time together as father and son was precious. She was surprised that a man who said he didn’t like to compromise certainly appeared to let his son make the rules.
Sitting on the pool edge, she dangled her legs into the water and thought for the first time in her life she had no future plans. Past these next six months in Adelaide she had no clue where she would go. Perhaps back to Washington—perhaps not. There was a newfound security in having no security in place. Nothing set in stone. And no one to let her down since she only had herself to rely upon. No man to break her heart and shatter her dreams. She had a temporary job and an income and that was all she really needed for the time being.
Phoebe Johnson was finally sailing her own ship and she liked it. She hoped that in this town, so far from everyone she knew, she might possibly find herself. But not for a very long time did she want to share her heart, her bed or potentially her future with a man—if indeed she ever did.
A Mommy to Make Christmas Page 5