“The Guardian League?”
“Yeah, I’ve been here since that night.”
“Christ. I…I’m so sorry, Val.” His voice laced with regret. “If only I’d taken you out that night…or if I’d been there…”
“This isn’t your fault, Glen. It’s…” Her voice broke.
“Val, I need to see you. I—”
A tear slipped out and trailed down her face. “I need to see you, too.” She didn’t lie. She dreaded breaking up with him, but she needed to. Despite everything, she wanted to see him, someone who knew her sisters, who’d grieve with her, too.
“Where and when? I’ll be there.”
“Can you meet me tomorrow at noon, Central Park?”
“I’ll be there.” He sighed heavily. “I’m so glad you’re alive. I…almost can’t believe it. Don’t think I will until I see you.”
“Tomorrow,” she promised.
“Tomorrow.”
She hung up and stared at the phone for several long moments.
It rang. She jumped, but immediately answered. “Glen?”
“Who’s Glen?”
“Oh, Annie. Hi, sweetie. He’s just a friend. How are you?”
“I’m good.” Her voice low, soft.
“Is everything all right?”
“Yes, but well…Uncle Jake says he needs to find someone to watch me because Ashley has to work, too, and you could. We could play games and watch TV, and you could read me bedtime stories.”
“Oh, Annie…” Her heart squeezed. She would love to, but she wasn’t the most suitable for the job. “I don’t know if that’s such a good idea. I don’t have any experience. I’m sure your uncle wants a professional.”
“A professional?”
“Yes, someone who has experience watching kids.”
“No, he doesn’t. He wants you. He likes you.”
God, was that true? No. It couldn’t be. He was warrior who’d just lost his sister and was now the guardian of his four-year-old niece. She was the last thing on his mind. “Annie—”
“Don’t you like me?”
She smiled. “Of course, I like you, Annie. I love―”
“Was he mean to you again?” she asked, bluntly. “Because he told me he said he was sorry, and I told him he couldn’t be mean again because you wouldn’t forgive him again.”
She didn’t doubt what Annie said, and wondered how Jake took that. Probably laughed. She couldn’t help but chuckle. “Did you?”
“Yes, I did, and he really was sorry, Val. I promise. I know because I felt it. So can you?”
“Can I?”
“Watch me while Uncle Jake and Ash are at work?”
If only she could. She had to stay away from Jake. Yet she could watch Annie without dealing too much with her uncle. She loved spending time with Annie, and this would give her a purpose, something that didn’t include hiding out and thinking about everyone and everything she’d lost. Still, she had a feeling what Annie wanted weren’t her uncle’s wishes. “Does your uncle know you’re on the phone with me?”
“He doesn’t need to know everything. I’m a big girl.”
Such a beautiful spirit. She outright laughed. “Yes, you are.” Telling herself once more Jake and her interactions would be minimal at most, she agreed. “If it’s okay with your uncle, I’d be thrilled to watch you while he’s at work.”
“Yay! I’m going to tell Uncle Jake right now!”
****
“Uncle Jake?”
He turned and spotted Annie smiling, a mischievous glint in her eyes. She was up to something, he knew and still, he couldn’t help but smile.
“I solved your problem.”
He lifted a brow. “And what problem is that?”
“I found someone to watch me while you work.”
Crossing his arms over his chest, he chuckled. “Did you?”
“I did.” She nodded. “Valerie.”
His heart stilled in his chest. Valerie? Why hadn’t he thought of that? He’d get to see her every night before he left and then when he returned. She could move into his apartment, into the spare room. He could prove to her he was worthy of her, make her fall for him, and then he’d tell her she belonged to him.
Would she agree? After everything…last night, that morning…He thought she’d forgiven him. He shared personal things about Annie and his life. It came easily, confiding in her, but then she’d made an excuse and left hastily.
“What’s wrong?”
“Annie.” He swallowed, then shook his head. “I don’t think she’ll agree.”
“Yes, she will. She already did.”
Impossible. He misheard. “She did?”
“I called her and asked, and she said if you said it was okay, she would. I told her you wouldn’t mind because you like her, but she wasn’t sure and she said something about a professional, but—”
He rushed her, lifted her, and spun in circles, then kissed her on the top of her head.
She giggled. “Uncle Jake!”
“You’re the best, pupa, absolutely the best.”
Chapter 15
Wringing her hands together, Valerie walked into the elevator and ascended to Jake’s floor, steeling herself to face him. The doors parted, and the air of animosity swirled around her. She flinched. Taking a deep breath, she walked through the doors and caught sight of him a moment later. He strode out of the laundry room, masculinity oozing out of him with each step. The anger vanished the moment his gaze locked on hers. A warm smile slid across his lips.
Surely, he was trying his best to make her feel at ease, shielding his anger and offering smiles. She would be thankful except she feared his smile more than his anger. The anger kept her at bay, but his smile, she got lost in it, forgot why she needed to stay away.
“Hi, thanks so much for this. It means a lot to Annie.”
To Annie. What did she expect? A declaration of love? Just because she felt things, emotions and sensations foreign to her, didn’t mean he felt them, too.
She looked away from the intensity of his dark eyes. “Of course.”
“It means a lot to me too, Val.”
Her heart lurched with hope, and her gaze shot to his. Breathless, she attempted to tamp down her emotions. She couldn’t, not when his dark eyes bore into her.
In that moment, she realized something beautiful. He may be an angry warrior, but his eyes held depth—dark depths. She read every emotion in him—emotions she felt herself, paining her as deeply as they pained him.
She forced herself to look away, again.
“I really can’t thank you enough.”
“It’s not a problem. It’s for Annie, after all.”
He tensed, then heaved a sigh. “Yeah, for Annie,” he mumbled. “Did you eat?”
She hadn’t since she’d been too distraught after her call with Glen and too nervous after speaking to Annie. “I’m fine.”
“Well…I made dinner in case you’re hungry later or feel free to have anything in the fridge.”
Annie rushed toward her. “Val!” Her small body hit hers, then her arms wrapped around her.
“Hiya, Annie.” She smiled. “I missed you.”
“I missed you, too, Val. I’ve been practicing the braid you taught me on my dolls all day. Uncle Jake says I’m getting good, but I don’t believe him.” She smiled, then whispered, “He doesn’t know any better.”
She laughed aloud, then remembered where she was. Her gaze went to him. His dark eyes on her, her laugh died suddenly. This time, she couldn’t say what she found staring into those deep depths, but no one had ever looked at her like that.
He reached for Annie, wrapping an arm around her shoulders, and hauled her against him. Annie tilted her head back to meet her uncle’s gaze.
“Pupa, be good tonight while I’m gone.”
“I thought you said I was always good?”
Cupping her cheek, he smiled. “You are always good…but you never want to go to bed.”
“Kids never want to go to bed,” she argued.
He chuckled, his eyes glimmering. “So I’ve learned, but don’t give Val any trouble about bedtime, okay? You need to rest.”
Nathan was right…The barrier, his shield of anger, gone with Annie. That morning, he hadn’t lied. Annie was his—his whole life. He joked, he laughed. He loved her.
“Oh, all right, I promise.”
He stood, towering over Valerie. “She bathed already. Bedtime’s at nine, but that’s the time I get her in bed. I read her a bedtime story.” He shrugged. “Sometimes two.”
“Sometimes three,” Annie added.
“Quite the disciplinarian, I see,” she said in jest, and instantly regretted it. He was self-conscious about his abilities as a caregiver. Whether a joke or not, he may not see it that way.
Before she could apologize, he shrugged. “What can I say?” His gaze on Annie. “Look at those eyes…”
Valerie did.
He shook his head. “Can’t refuse them.”
Annie smiled.
“They plead, and…she’s got me wrapped around her finger. Luckily, she’s a good kid and doesn’t take advantage…doesn’t take too much advantage,” he corrected, then winked in Annie’s direction.
Annie giggled, then threw herself at him, wrapping her arms around his legs.
It hit her, square in the chest.
She never felt anything like it.
So much emotion, she gasped, breathless.
Happiness.
Fulfillment.
Contentment.
Belonging.
It radiated from him.
A reminder of what she missed the most. A rush of tears watered her eyes. Wrapping her arms around her middle, she looked away from them and blinked quickly.
Not a split second went by before he was in her space. One arm snaked around her waist, the other pulling her hair out of her face to cup her cheek. The scent of him filled her, the natural heat of his body soothing.
“Are you okay?”
“She’s just surprised, Uncle Jake. She’s not used to feeling other people’s emotions. You do that a lot.”
When she didn’t respond, he softly lifted her chin to meet his gaze.
Eyes moist, her cheeks heated. “Sorry, I—”
“No, I’m sorry. I didn’t realize I’d projected them.”
He felt what she did, so he knew it wasn’t just that. He didn’t push it though, giving her an out. Sweet, but she couldn’t handle sweet just then.
Pulling her head away from his grasp, she avoided his eyes. “No, don’t. It wasn’t…” She felt more tears prick her eyes and pushed him away, needing more than anything to get away, from him, from Annie who felt the strength of her grief, a grief so deep it burned her from the inside out.
“No, Val…” She felt the heat of Annie’s small body at her side, hugging her tightly. “Don’t be sad.”
Sweet, so sweet. These two didn’t know it, but being sweet made her lose the little hold she had over the onslaught of her emotions.
Tears spilled from her eyes. She rubbed them away quickly, breathed deeply for several moments, trying to ignore what she felt. “I’m s-sorry.” Embarrassed, she glanced in his direction.
God, his eyes. All that pain and guilt.
Why?
And something else, too.
Regret.
Not too hard to guess the reason. First day on the job, a job supposed to give her life purpose, a job she technically hadn’t yet started, and she was a mess. Annie wasn’t an empath, this could be overlooked. Annie was also a four year old who had just lost both parents and needed someone to bring as much joy to her life as possible. Valerie had lost her family too, and while this would help them bond, it also meant she was not suited for the job. Annie dealing with her own loss didn’t need to feel hers, too. Knowing that fact and understanding it didn’t make it less painful. She needed Annie, a glimpse of belonging, of being needed, but also, she wanted to be a part of the young girl’s life.
And so she said, “I’m sorry. I promise not to upset Annie. I promise…I’ll be more careful—”
“Shit.” He cupped Annie’s cheek. “Pupa, I need to talk to Val alone. Wait for me in your room.”
Annie nodded and walked away.
Valerie stilled, terrified to move, to speak, to breathe, so sure she’d already lost the job. Worse, she was sure Jake would forbid her from seeing Annie. She couldn’t blame him.
He took a hesitant step in her direction. His gaze probing yet soft, then he wrapped his arms around her. One snaked around her back, the other around her shoulders; he cupped the back of her head and cradled her against his chest.
She tensed, but then let go. Softening against him, she wrapped one arm around him, gripped his shirt with the other, and let him hold her. It felt amazing, not just because he felt amazing—the strength of his body, the scent of him around her, his lips resting against her forehead—but because for the first time since she lost her family, she felt safe. Feeling that, she let tears trail down her cheeks.
Maybe not such a wise idea. “I’m sorry…I—”
“Shh-shh…” He laced his fingers through her hair, then cupped the back of her neck, holding her more firmly against him. “It’s okay. Everything’s going to be fine.”
Exactly what she needed, someone, anyone to hold her like she belonged, tell her everything would be fine even if it never would.
Her arm around him tightened. “I’m sorry, please…don’t fire me. I care about Annie a lot and…”
Pulling away from the embrace just enough to meet her gaze, he sighed. “Valerie, I’m not going to fire you. God, I wouldn’t do that because you…you…” With his strong, big hands, he wiped her tears away. “You must think I’m a monster.”
Taking a deep, pained breath, she closed her eyes. Val had been so angry when he assumed the worst of her, yet she’d just done the same. And despite her assumption, he wasn’t angry. He held her, comforting her, speaking to her so softly.
“I just thought because—”
“We can’t help what we feel or when we feel it.”
“But Annie can feel it, and I’m supposed to—”
“Val, sweetheart, it’s okay.” He dragged her to him again and held her for several moments, without a word, without blame.
Burying her face in his chest, she let him until he soothed the ache inside. Only then did she pull away and whisper, “Thank you.”
Close enough the heat of his breath warmed her skin, he combed his fingers through her hair and smiled. “No need to thank me, Val.”
She didn’t want him to let her go—ever. She shook the thought aside. “But…I should…I’m sorry—”
“Tell me what happened.”
No, she couldn’t. She didn’t want to talk about it, not to anyone, especially him—the man she feared falling for, the man she needed to stay away from, the man who could comfort her with a single touch. Talking about it, she’d relive it, and that was the last thing she wanted to do. It’d make it worse.
Unwrapping her arm from around his waist, she brought it to his chest and with both hands, pushed.
He didn’t budge. His arm around her waist tightened; the other on her back held her to him. Even then, he didn’t get angry. As if he had all the time in the world, he pleaded, “Please, tell me.”
She fought the urge to stare into his eyes, knowing if she did, she’d cave. Yet her gaze unconsciously drifted to his. “Why don’t you know?”
Jaw clenched, his eyes hardened. He swallowed and some of that hardness faded. “I was with—”
“Annie.” Not surprising. Nathan knew little about her, and he’d been entrusted to guard her.
Looking away from him, she made a decision she could come to regret. “The Guardians rescued me. You can figure out the rest.”
His body tensed. Eyes flared, tinting their dark depths crimson. The muscles in his shoulders and chest bulged. She had reason
to fear. A demon’s red gaze signaled he was close to turning, but she couldn’t move, too captivated and enthralled staring into those eyes.
His hand at her back went to her cheek. Softly, his fingers caressed her, and yet the fire in his eyes never faded. She didn’t know how he managed it.
“What did they do?” His voice tinged in restrained anger.
“It doesn’t matter,” she whispered.
“It matters to me. Tell me.” His eyes burned deeper, still she read them—anger, regret, pain—but he held every emotion in check, shielding them from her. “Tell me. Did they…did they t-touch you?” He choked on the word.
“We had powerful spells protecting our home. They couldn’t get to me, but…they found a way to hurt us anyway.”
After a long moment, she said, “I’m the lone survivor of my coven.”
The next moment, she was once again pressed against him. One hand in her hair, the other so tight around her waist she could barely breathe. Face buried in her neck, breathing deep. His lips firm against her pulse. Her skin erupted in goose flesh, she shivered.
“I’m sorry…so sorry. I should’ve been there. I should’ve…”
God, why? She wanted to scream in frustration. Why did she feel better after telling him? Why did his reaction make her feel like she wasn’t alone? Why did it feel so right to be held by him?
“Jake, I’m fine…I promise. I can watch Annie.”
He chuckled, but it lacked humor. “Fate’s a cruel bitch,” he mumbled, then pulled away, stopping to kiss her forehead, lightly. “I know you can watch Annie. I trust you.”
She didn’t know why he trusted her. She had no experience with children, clearly wasn’t the most suitable, and he barely knew her. She lifted a brow. “Do you?”
“Yes, I do.” He turned away from her momentarily then faced her. “I should’ve been the one to save you. I should’ve been there. I’ll never forgive myself for that.”
Her jaw dropped. She had no idea what to say. “Jake, I mean Jacob—”
“I like it when you call me Jake.” He smiled.
Her mind went blank, completely forgetting what she meant to say. Not good. It took her a moment to think. “Okay, Jake. Thank you for…” holding me.
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