“I should not have pressed...I’m sorry.” I said softly, ashamed with my thoughtlessness and insensitivity. I cleared my throat and gestured towards his leg. “At least you healed well enough to get around, and I trust your wife is alright?”
He nodded, finally saying. “Yes, we escaped to safety.” He said quietly, though gave no further details on their encounter. A moment of silence passes as he took a sip, then asked, “Your sister still fares well after her time in captivity?”
I nodded to him, rolling my eyes a little and saying, “Yes, she seems none the worse for wear, though I don’t think she understands how lucky she is that she wasn’t more grievously hurt.” Memories of my father’s lifeless body flickered through my mind’s eye and I pressed my lips together, unable to hide the hurting.
Taliesin gave me a compassionate look and a gentle smile, reaching his hand across the table to rest it on my wrist, giving it an encouraging squeeze. “As you say, she was fortunate to-...” His sentence was cut off by an excited squeal near the front door.
“Carys!”
We both turned to look, seeing Rhian dragging Darius behind her, the latter laden with parcels. Mother and Brynmor came in the door behind them, Brynmor grinning until he saw that I was in the company of an attractive man, which dropped that grin into a jealous frown. I forced a smile as I let out a low, agonized groan that brought a smirk to Taliesin’s face. “Speaking of my sister…” I murmured.
Taliesin chuckled softly and drained the last of his ale. “Well, it seems you are about to be stolen away, so I will leave you to your family business.” He said, rising as he adjusted his weight on his good leg. “We will speak again soon, I’m sure.” He dipped his head and gave me a charming grin, limping away as my family approached, flashing a smile and dipping his head politely as he passed them by.
Rhian was transfixed by the man who was leaving my company, her light blue eyes wide, “He’s so handsome…” She murmured dreamily as she gawked until he was out of sight. “Carys, who was that? Why are you talking to handsome men?”
Brynmor, unlike Rhian, was cold and rigid like steel. “Yes, Carys, why are you talking to handsome men?” Darius gave Brynmor a wary look as though expecting the man to fly into a jealous rage, and I wondered what sort of things had been said over in the staff house to warrant such a reaction.
Mother slid gracefully into the chair that Taliesin had just vacated and flashed a dazzling smile to me. “Now, now, Carys has every right to be in the presence of handsome men, betrothed or otherwise.” Her eyes turned towards Brynmor to give him a smile before turning back to me. “Now, darling, who was that?”
I looked between all three as they stared at me and my eyes rolled. “He is a friend, nothing more.” Brynmor looked doubtful, Rhian looked excited, and Mother looked increasingly curious. “He had a bit of an encounter with a pair of Azkaelomin as well, so we were comparing notes. I still hope we can track down the ones that took Rhian and our gold.”
Rhian let out an exasperated sigh, dusting off her dress as she muttered. “There is no point. If the elves couldn’t find them, what hope do you have? Besides, they are probably long gone by now.”
Brynmor’s jaw tightened, though whether it was out of his jealousy at my friendship with another man or the fact that Rhian’s abductors were still at large, I wasn’t sure. He shook his head and said, “Rhian’s right, they are long gone. They got whatever it was they came here for and have gone back to Azkaelom.” He announced with finality as though challenging us to argue.
Darius balanced the parcels on the table and took a seat, looking between all of us. “At least nobody got hurt, well... except Ben, but that was something else, and now we have a wedding to plan and life moves on, right?”
Damn the wedding! I wanted to scream, and I gave Darius a dark look, saying, “The wedding was Father’s wish, and now with him gone there is no need to be in such a rush. I have too much on my plate, and until I can actually catch my breath and think about something other than the mortal danger we always seem to find ourselves in, there will be no wedding!” I snapped.
Everyone went still and stared at me, surprised by my outburst. Brynmor finally spoke first, cautious, “I know that this was your Father’s idea, not yours, but I am still going to marry you, Carys. We can wait for awhile if you want, but I don’t see the point. I love you and I’m going to marry you and I would take you to Town Hall and have the mayor do it right now if I thought you wouldn’t burn the city hall down.”
Rhian winced a little at his words, eyes now downcast as she fidgeted with her hands in her lap. Darius went quiet, looking between Brynmor and myself, though his gaze lingered longer on me than on Brynmor.
Mother looked somberly at me and then rolled her eyes dramatically. “Really, Carys, there is no need for theatrics. It is no surprise that a woman of your beauty would want to consider her options, but despite your Father being gone, I am his wife and so I say this marriage arrangement will hold. You are far too serious, and a marriage with Brynmor will be good for you. You really do need some fun in your life, Carys.” She said evenly, though I was left to stare at her.
“You always told us to do as we pleased and marry whomever we desired. You hated the idea of a marriage to Brynmor and now you are insisting on it? Why do you even care who I marry?” I shot back, annoyed, taking my goblet a little too roughly to slosh a little of the crimson vintage over the edge of the goblet.
Mother just smirked and crooned at me. “He won me over, Carys. And I do care about the future of this family, Carys. Unlike your father, I will do what must be done. I will make sure everything is made right.” She turned to place her order with the waitress as she approached, ordering for everyone but me. I wished I could believe that she had this family’s best interests in mind, but I had my doubts.
“What needs to be made right, Mother? What needs to be done to secure our future?” I asked hotly, my temper rising swiftly. Her cryptic answer confused me, and I was already bewildered enough without her adding to the list.
Mother just smiled with her usual cool indifference, chuckling softly as she rose from her seat. “Don’t worry your pretty head over it, darling. I will take care of all of it.” She pulled her shawl loosely around her shoulders and asked as she dismissed herself. “Now, if you will excuse me, I need to find your brother. There are things with the family’s accounts that must be settled.”
Father had intended to make Mother his beneficiary once again, but on the day he he was supposed to go to the bank, he had gotten waylaid by another task and never got there. Of course, I could have told her right then and there that Iolyn wouldn’t be able to help her with the family’s accounts, their administration passing to me at Father’s death, but I said nothing.
After all the years of her passive aggressive insults aimed at my sense of duty to the family and nature, she could figure out the hard way that she wouldn’t hold the reins of our family’s legacy until I was certain she wouldn’t bring us to ruin. Father had entrusted our future to me, and Mother or not, I took my duty to that end seriously.
Her skirts swished as she departed with an arrogant toss of her hair, and under the strange looks given me by Brynmor, Rhian, and Darius, I pulled out the letter I had been writing to continue it.
Rhian frowned at me as she huffed lightly. “Why are you so mean to Mother, Carys? She is alive and back with us. Don’t make her regret coming home.” She said with a pout forming.
I let out a tired sigh as I finished the letter. “Rhian, you were young so I know you didn’t realize it, but she doted on you and you alone. To the rest of us, she was just aloof and uncaring, just a woman who lived in our house and ate our food.” I said quietly, trying to keep my resentment at bay. “She never loved Father, and if that is the case, I don’t for a moment believe she has our best interests in mind.” I rose from my seat, having the sudden need to be anywhere but here.
Brynmor rose with me, worry etched into his features as
he glanced at me. “I will walk with you.” He insisted, and while I wanted to refuse, I had brushed him off far too often lately and this was one time I knew he wouldn’t take no for an answer. I gave him a faint nod before looking at Darius. “You will make sure Rhian gets home safely? I think Madox is coming into town this afternoon, so you could wait for him as well.”
Ben’s warning flared in my mind, Amir’s interest in my sister renewing the protective nature that flowed in my veins. “Actually...wait for Madox. That’s an order.” I gave Rhian a stern look, knowing she would likely try to go off on her own, heedless of the true danger. “Amir is in the Infirmary and shackled to the bed for his insanity, but that doesn’t make you safe. I mean it, Rhian...wait for Madox.”
Her brow furrowed with worry and she nodded her capitulation. Darius frowned up at me and said. “I can keep her safe, Lady Carys, really.” His hand dropped to the hilt of the dagger he kept tucked in the back of his belt, but I knew Amir wasn’t like any common thug. You would be beaten before you even knew you were in a fight.
I shook my head at Darius now, murmuring. “I’m sure you think you can, but we have guards for a reason, and Amir is not one to be trifled with. Stay here until Madox comes by.”
My family had been shocked when I told them of Amir’s confession, knowing it was likely true, and yet it was hard to ignore the idea it might have been just the ravings of a lunatic. The Watchmen were keeping a very close eye on him, at least, though none of us felt much safer. With his eyes on Rhian, I was strongly considering doubling her guards, just to be safe.
I didn’t bother with any farewells, turning on my heel to head out the front door, Brynmor following right behind me. He waited until we were down the road and near a small treed alcove before he pulled me into the private protection that it offered.
“Carys, you need to relax.” He pulled me into his arms, taking my chin in one hand to tilt it upwards to press his lips to mine. I stiffened, not having expected a show of affection, and I wasn’t prepared. He pulled away, grinning down to me. “See, now I know you need to relax when you can’t even let me kiss you.” He teased, taking my reaction as a sign of stress, rather than repugnance.
I tried to step back, but his arm around me held me firmly against him. “Oh no.” He said to me. “You are not getting away from me that easily. We haven’t been able to get any time alone since we got back from our trip and I am not about to let this one get away from me.” His arm tightened around my waist, pressing me up tightly against his chest as he released my chin in favor of running his hand through my hair.
“Bryn...let me go. I have a long list of things I need to do and I just don’t have time t-..” My excuse was cut off as he leaned down to kiss me again, though it didn’t relax me, it only wound me up more. Every weak, uninspiring kiss he gave me reminded me of the strength and passion in Ben’s kiss, and no embrace Brynmor ever gave me would live up to the standard Ben had set.
He must have sensed I wasn’t sharing his enthusiasm or passion, and pulled back with a frown. “Carys..” He started lowly, his voice barely above a growl. “I realize that marrying me wasn’t your choice, but even though it was your Father’s directive and now he is gone, I still want to marry you. I always cared about you, but now with thinking about the life we are going to share, how I will get to make love to you and how we will have a family together...I love you, Carys, and I have no intentions of walking away from this. You will be my wife, and I couldn’t be happier.” He said, pulling me tightly against him as he leaned down to rest his head on my head.
“The Town Hall is just down the street...we could go right now and not even bother with a wedding, if the planning is that stressful. Weddings are just girl stuff anyways, and who needs that?” He grinned, knowing that I wasn’t much for pomp and pageantry. Of course, that didn’t make the idea any more welcome to me.
I shook my head. “We could go now, yes, but we won’t. War is brewing, the Azkaelomin that abducted Rhi are still out there, my Father was just murdered by a madman who also happens to have a thing for Rhian, and he was hired by some unknown enemy that haunts our footsteps. If we marry today, there will be no joy in it. It will only be one more thing checked off on my very long list of things to do, and a marriage deserves a better start than that.”
He sighed and released me, turning to stalk out of the alcove. “Fine. You are right. Let’s just go home.” He grunted, a miserable look forming on his face.
My guilt was reaching overwhelming proportions. I didn’t love him, despite his growing love for me. He had once been a friend but now, it was a struggle to be in the same room as him, and I felt horrible. The man deserved far better than what I could give. Do I break my promise to Father and choose my own happiness over Bryn’s and the good of my whole family? Or do I die a little each day, doing my duty? There were no right answers.
CHAPTER 61
With Ben no longer training me in self-defense and combat, I had been forced to take up lessons in the Militia Headquarters, the command center of Lundham’s poor excuse for an army. While the Watchmen maintained justice within the city of Lund, it was the militia’s job to patrol and see to the safety of the outlying areas. They were also willing to teach any townsfolk willing to learn, and even more importantly, pay for the privilege of doing so.
I had just finished a lesson with the former Watchmen that currently led Lund’s Militia force, a tall, grizzled soldier who taught what he believed a Taurovan noblewoman should be able to handle, which meant he went far too easy on me. His lessons lacked the intensity that Ben’s had, but it was good practice so I didn’t consider them a total waste of time.
Striding down the narrow alley that would deliver me to the main road, the whiff of exotic floral perfume greeted me as I rounded a corner. A low and cultured voice greeted me next, only the faint lilt of a foreign accent noticeable. “Hello, Pet.” Zahra crooned from where she waited in the arch of a doorway, her luxurious black hair tumbling in perfect waves over her shoulders and the intricate finery of her gown.
My heart jumped into my throat as I let out a strangled gasp, startled as much as I was instantly filled with dread at the sight of her. My fingers flexed, nearly giving into my instinct to grab my dagger from my boot, though by her snugly fitted dress, it was obvious that she was unarmed. As my wild eyes settled on her annoyingly placid and beautiful face, her lips curved upwards, evidently quite pleased with my reaction.
“What are you doing here?” I asked, trying not to sound as nervous as I felt. Ben’s comment about her being willing to do anything Amir asked of her had been seared into my mind, a sudden alarm forming a thick knot in my belly as I wondered if Amir had sent her to follow me.
She tsked and shook her head, her voice as smooth as silk with her reply. “I expected better manners from you, but good day to you, too. I see you are continuing your training without your handsome guard.” Her hand lifted to gesture gracefully towards the Militia’s headquarters, and I realized she had been watching me too long, and I silently berated myself for not noticing.
“Yes.” I said icily, giving her a pointed look. “One never knows when someone might try to murder them.” Like Amir had murdered my father, I nearly added, though by some miracle, I managed to hold my tongue against the barb.
Her brow arched as a smile curled on her lips. “Truer words have never been spoken.” She said cryptically, sending a chill up my spine and down to my very fingertips at the unexpected comment, a moment’s thought on her meaning leaving me sufficiently disturbed.
I slowly began to circle around where she stood, keeping my eyes fixed on hers as thoughts and questions began to fill my mind. Amir had said she wasn’t involved, but did that mean she was ignorant of his actions? Her onyx irises were so black it was like looking into the Void itself and my stomach twisted as I demanded an answer to what she alone might know for certain. “Did Amir kill my Father?”
She studied me with an indecipherable look, and for a spl
it second, I thought she had been surprised, though I had no idea whether it was because Amir had done it, or because I knew he had done it. “Yes, I suppose he did.” She replied softly, her eyes narrowing a little as they followed me in my arc around her.
So he had murdered Father. I didn’t feel any better with knowing, only more confused. The idea that it had been a senseless death sickened me, but the thought of him being deliberately targeted by someone had me alarmed. “Who hired him, and why? Does it have anything to do with Rhian?” I stopped to face her as I demanded answers from her, my fear leaking through my charade of boldness.
Something shifted, and suddenly she was dominating the conversation while beginning slow and calculated steps around me in a similar, yet opposing arc to the one I had just made around her. She answered with a shrewd smile. “He does have an unnatural interest in her, doesn’t he? He always did like his pets young...But no.”
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