by Force, Marie
She swallowed hard when he came even closer.
“I want to hug you, but only if you say it’s okay.”
As if she were a bystander watching this moment unfold for two other people, Maggie was acutely aware that if she allowed him to touch her, she’d be taking a step that could never be undone. Even knowing that, she wanted to hug him. “It’s okay.”
He took two steps to close the distance between them and put his arms around her.
The second she was engulfed in the scent of soap and laundry detergent and horse and leather, she was a goner. He held her just right, making her feel as if she’d suddenly come home after a long, perilous journey. Her hands found his back, and they stood like that for a long time. Days or weeks might’ve passed for all she knew.
“I’m so sorry I wasn’t here to help when you lost Debbie.”
“You did help.”
“I wish I’d been here with you.”
Maggie pulled back a little only because she wanted to see his face. “Brayden…” She forgot what she’d been about to say when she noticed the hungry, almost desperate way he was looking at her mouth, as if he was thinking of a thousand different ways to kiss her and trying to figure out which one to go with. She licked her lips.
He must’ve made his decision, because he raised his hands to her face and went easy at first, waiting for her to catch up.
At first, Maggie was too stunned by the way her legs nearly gave out under her to properly respond, but then she pressed herself against him and opened her mouth to his tongue. Of course the man could kiss like nobody’s business. Somehow she’d already known it would be this way with him, unlike it’d ever been before. Maybe that was why she’d been so hesitant to let this happen, because she’d known instinctively that he’d change her life if she let him.
He kissed her senseless. There was simply no other word for it.
Maggie clung to him so she wouldn’t embarrass herself by falling to the ground in a boneless pile.
When he backed off from the kiss, she went up on tiptoes to keep him from getting away.
“Easy, sweetheart. Hold that thought for just a second.” He let her go in increments, while Maggie blinked a couple of times to clear her brain and recover herself.
She’d been kissed plenty of times, but never before had a kiss left her feeling like she’d just survived an earthquake. While taking a deep breath and releasing it, she watched his impatient stride eat up the ground between her and Sunday.
Brayden pulled the sheet from the saddle bag, and as he returned to her, Maggie noticed the way the denim of his jeans hugged the distinctive bulge that told her their kiss had affected him the same way it had her. He spread the sheet on the ground and held out a hand, inviting her to join him.
Maggie took his hand and sat with him.
He put his arm around her and kissed the top of her head. “I couldn’t wait to get home to see you. Longest vacation ever.”
“You’re silly. You were in Key West with your boys.”
“And all I wanted was to be here with you.”
Her heart beat so fast, she could hear it and feel it in all her pulse points. Every part of her was tuned in to him and the way he made her feel. “Brayden…”
“Hmm?” He nuzzled her hair until he gained access to her neck.
Before she had time to prepare, she was falling backward as he hovered above her, looking down at her with intense brown eyes that seemed to see right through to the heart of her.
“Is this okay?” he asked.
She nodded and reached for him, taking advantage of the opportunity to run her fingers through silky strands of thick hair.
A groan came from deep inside him. “I knew it would be like this with you.”
“Like what?”
He ran his lips lightly over hers. “Like a wildfire burning out of control.”
“How did you know that?”
“Because I’ve never wanted to leave Key West before I even got there.”
“I missed you.”
His brows lifted. “Did you?”
“I did. And I kept asking myself how that was possible when you’d only been here a couple of days before you left.”
“I know what you mean.” He ran a finger over her cheek to her mouth, where he outlined the shape of her lips. “My attraction to you was instant. Even as I was thinking it wasn’t a smart idea to be attracted to my potential boss, I couldn’t seem to help it. My new boss is just so incredibly smart and competent and devoted to her job and beautiful. So, so beautiful. And sexy.”
Maggie felt the creep of heat in her cheeks. She’d never been with any guy who was so blunt about how he felt. Most of the time, she’d had to drag information out of the guys she’d dated. With Brayden, there would never be any doubt, which was rather refreshing.
His fingers slid lightly over her throat and down her chest.
She realized he was unbuttoning her shirt, and while she knew she ought to stop him, she couldn’t bring herself to actually do it.
The brush of his fingertips against her sensitive skin set off a wave of reactions she felt everywhere, especially in the tight points of her nipples and in the throbbing heartbeat between her legs.
“Breathe, sweetheart. Just breathe.”
He kissed her neck and throat, laying a path to her chest, where he kissed the plump tops of her breasts that spilled out of the cups of her bra. His finger touched the front clasp. “Yes or no?”
She should say no and put a stop to this before it went any further. They were out in the open where anyone could see them, even though she was certain no one else was around for miles.
While he waited for her to reply, he dragged his fingertips lightly over her belly while continuing to leave damp kisses on the tops of her breasts. He nudged at her nipple through her bra, and Maggie nearly levitated off the ground, so he did it again and again until she said, “Yes, Brayden. Yes.”
He twisted his fingers and had her bra open within seconds. “Fuck me, you’re so, so pretty.” And then he dropped his head to take her nipple into the heat of his mouth, licking, sucking and generally making her crazy.
Her hips came up off the ground, looking for more.
Brayden shifted so he was fully on top of her, pressing his hard cock into the V of her legs as he moved from one nipple to the other while holding her breasts in callused hands that added to the tsunami of sensation coursing through her.
God, she’d had full-on sex with other guys and not felt anything even close to what he was making her feel simply by touching her breasts. This was too much and not enough at the same time.
She yanked on the front of his shirt until the snaps gave way to reveal his beautiful chest, which he brought down on hers, rocking back and forth, feeding the fire that blazed so hot between them.
When she felt the tug of his fingers on the button to her jeans, Maggie came out of the lust-induced fog to realize what was going to happen unless one of them found some sense.
“Brayden.” She covered his hand with hers. “Not here.”
He exhaled roughly and sagged into her.
Maggie put her arms around him and caressed his back under his shirt.
“Didn’t mean to get carried away,” he said after a long silence.
“We both did.”
He raised his head to look down at her, his sexy lips curling into a smug smile. “Does this mean you’ll go out with me?”
“I’m still not sure.”
His lips parted, and his eyes went wide with surprise.
Maggie laughed. “Close your mouth before flies get in there.”
Brayden closed his mouth and moved so he was on his side next to her, his head propped on an upturned hand. “Are you planning to torture me? Is that the plan?”
Maggie pulled her shirt closed and fiddled with the two sides of her bra until they were clasped together. She sat up and ran her fingers through her hair. “I’d like to spend time with you.”
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“But?”
“Despite the kissing and stuff, which was very nice, by the way, I continue to be concerned about the thing you won’t talk about.”
His expression immediately hardened. He didn’t like that.
Maggie buttoned her shirt, stood and brushed grass off her pants.
Brayden stood, snapped his shirt and grabbed the sheet, shaking it out before folding it and tucking it under his arm.
She looked up at him and forced herself to say the things that had to be said. “I shared things with you that I hadn’t told anyone else. I told you the thing about Ethan before I told my sisters. I never talk about what happened to my family. Friends I’ve known for years haven’t heard that story. I trusted you, Brayden. All I’m asking is for you to do the same. After what happened to me in New York, I’m more cautious than I used to be. I hope you understand.”
When he had nothing to say to that, Maggie forced herself to walk away. She mounted Thunder and headed for the path in the trees, keeping her gaze fixed on the way forward. If she looked back at him, she might remember what it’d been like to be held and kissed by him and waver in her determination to get to the truth before this went any further.
Chapter 20
Brayden managed to avoid running into Maggie until noon on Monday, when they were scheduled to meet about the therapeutic riding program and the unique needs of each child. He’d spent a sleepless night staring up at the ceiling, tortured from wanting more of her and trying to decide if he could trust her with something he’d told no one since leaving juvenile detention.
He entered the house through the kitchen and stopped to talk to Mitch, who was stirring a pot on the stove. “Something smells good.”
“Pasta sauce for spaghetti night. The kids’ favorite after tacos and pizza.”
“They’ll be excited for dinner.”
“That’s the goal. How was your trip?”
“Good time with the boys. Key West is always fantastic.”
“Looks like you got some sun, too.”
“Yep. Is Maggie around?”
“In her office, I believe.”
“Okay, thanks.”
Brayden tried to brace himself to see her, but nothing could’ve prepared him for the gut punch that happened every time she turned those startling blue eyes on him. And when she smiled… God, she was gorgeous. While she looked as great as she always did, with her long dark hair pulled into a ponytail, he could see the hint of reserve coming from her that hadn’t been there before their encounter yesterday. He hated having given her reason to pull back from him, but he certainly understood why she felt it was necessary.
“Hey, are we still on to meet about the kids?”
“Sure. Come in.”
He sat in the seat across from her desk, pulled a pen from his shirt pocket and settled a notepad on his lap while trying not to think about her gorgeous breasts. As if he would ever forget that or what it had been like to kiss her sweet lips and mold her sexy body to his.
Feeling a stirring in his groin, he crossed his legs and tamped down those thoughts to focus on business.
Over the next hour, they discussed each child, what had brought their family to the shelter, what particular issues and needs their mothers had identified at intake and what Maggie had observed during their stay.
“Last but not least is Travis, who you’ve met. He and his mother came to us after a domestic situation in their home. Travis intervened when his mother’s boyfriend was assaulting her and ended up being assaulted himself.”
Brayden took notes while seething on the inside at the thought of a grown man raising his fists to a four-year-old child.
“When we first met him, his face, arms and torso were covered in bruises. His mother suffered a shattered eardrum and a concussion in the altercation.”
“Tell me the guy is in jail.”
“He is—for now, but only because of outstanding warrants. Otherwise, he would’ve been released on bail by now.”
Brayden shook his head with disgust.
“Believe me, I know,” Maggie said. “I’m in an online support group with other shelter directors, and the lack of justice in our criminal justice system is a frequent topic of discussion. It’s not just an issue here. It’s everywhere.”
“I agree. What else can you tell me about Travis?”
“I believe you’ll find him to be the most excited to work with the horses. It’s all he talks about since he arrived and realized he could see the horses every day. His mother is a little hesitant about the program because she’s afraid he’ll get addicted and she won’t be able to afford riding lessons after they leave us.”
“I’d do it for free afterward if that puts her mind at ease.”
Maggie stared at him for a long moment before blinking. She looked down at her notes before glancing back at him. “That’s very nice of you.”
“I’m not going to abandon these kids just because they don’t live here anymore. I’ll see them on my own time afterward.”
“It doesn’t have to be on your own time. Kate and Reid believe in making an indefinite commitment to provide support to our families for as long as they need us.”
“My program could do that as well.”
“I’d hoped so, but I wasn’t sure how you’d feel about that.”
“Well, now you know. I’m in it for the long haul with these kids, for as long as they want to be part of it.”
“I really appreciate that.”
He shrugged. “I know what horses and riding meant to me as a kid. I’d never take that away from any kid who was loving it.” Clicking the pen closed, he returned it to his shirt pocket. “Where are we with hiring additional support staff?”
She handed him two pieces of paper. “I hired two local high school kids last week, and they’ll be here by three. Both come highly recommended by local stables. They’re interested in studying therapeutic riding and family counseling in college.”
“Excellent. I guess I’ll see you out there when the kids get home.”
After hesitating for a second, as if she had something else she wanted to say, she only nodded. “See you then.”
Brayden walked out, feeling like he was leaving something important behind as he went to the stables to prepare for the first lesson with the kids. All he wanted to do was go back in there, find Maggie and tell her everything she wanted to know if that would mean she’d give him a chance to be something more to her than a friendly colleague she kept at arm’s length.
He already knew he wouldn’t be able to stand having her so close but eternally out of reach, especially after having held and kissed her. She wanted him to tell her something that even his closest friends didn’t know.
On the advice of his attorney at the time, he’d told no one in his adult life about the things that’d happened before his eighteenth birthday. “If no one knows,” the attorney had said, “the information can never be used against you. If you tell even one person, you’re risking everything we’ve worked so hard to protect.”
Brayden had religiously followed the attorney’s advice for twelve years. His sealed juvenile record as well as the GED he’d received in lockup had come up at other job interviews, but he’d always declined to discuss it. His boilerplate response was, “Juvenile records are sealed for a reason.” Fortunately, his professional skills had been in enough demand that the information hadn’t kept him from enjoying a fulfilling career.
It’d never been an issue with the women he dated because they didn’t know. When they asked him where he went to high school, he’d say a private school in Nashville. No one had ever asked him to elaborate on that, and he’d told himself that it didn’t count as a lie if he was following his attorney’s advice to be vague about his childhood and the fact that he’d received a GED while in juvenile lockup.
His conscience had never been bothered by the lie because none of the other women he’d dated had really mattered to him. Those relationships—if you
could call them that—had been about fun and sex and lighthearted entertainment. He’d never come close to having anything serious, and he’d liked it that way. Until he met Maggie and knew almost right away that she could be different.
She could change everything.
He was seriously torn by this dilemma, and more than at any time since he’d lost his mom, he yearned to talk to her about it. She’d been the only person from his childhood he’d stayed in contact with and thus had been the only one who’d known his full story. She’d have known what he should do about Maggie.
Brayden went through the motions preparing for the day’s lesson on the basics of the stables, how to care for the horses, the parts and pieces of the tack. Tomorrow, they would learn how to saddle a horse and how to lead a horse around the paddock. He’d asked Derek to leave two stalls for the children to work on cleaning, and he would use Sunday to teach them how to groom and care for a horse after riding.
Usually, he felt pumped to introduce a new group of kids to the joy of interacting with and caring for horses, but today, he couldn’t seem to find anything approaching joy due to the ongoing torment over Maggie.
After what she’d been through with that douchebag Ethan, he didn’t blame her for drawing her line in the sand with him. She had every right to feel the way she did, even if her line in the sand had him tied up in knots of uncertainty. He wanted so badly to trust her the way she’d trusted him, but the attorney had put the fear of God into him. The thought of spilling his guts to anyone, even Maggie, made him feel sick.
Brayden knew he’d gotten lucky to have a skill that made him highly employable despite the black mark he carried on his record. He’d spent his entire adult life working hard to overcome his past, to create an unimpeachable reputation for professionalism and results for the kids he worked with. There’d been so many success stories, far more successes than failures. But none of that mattered to Maggie when it came to pursuing a relationship with him.
His mind spun in circles that went from understanding where she was coming from to anger that she’d put him in this untenable position and back to understanding without finding a solution he could live with that would satisfy her need to know his secrets.