by Amber Heart
“I’ve got a study group at 3:00 PM, I’ll bring Ava by your place after that. Around 5:00 PM,” he concluded. Trying to tamp down his anger.
“OK, I should be back by th– ” Kalyn said before Silas hung up, seething with anger. He had hoped that Kalyn would be an ally in his journey to providing a better future for their daughter but – so far – that seemed to be a dream deferred.
Still upset and not even trying to conceal it this time, Silas got Ava all packed up, into his car, and over to library. When he got there, although he was about thirty minutes early, Chance was already in place.
“You are always early,” he mused, carting Ava on his hip, as they approached the table where Chance was sitting. “It doesn’t even matter how early I am, you always beat me!”
As she watched Silas approach with a blond-haired, blue-eyed little girl, Chance’s eyes grew wide and a soft smile appeared across her lips. “Who’s the munchkin?” she asked, with her head tilted.
“This,” Silas said, putting her on the floor, “is my daughter, Ava.”
“Ah! I didn’t know you were a dad!” she said, still smiling at the toddler.
“Well, yeah – this is actually the prior obligation I was talking about later,” he admitted sheepishly.
As if they were kindred spirits, reunited, Ava ran over to Chance and immediately got in her lap. Silas watched on in disbelief. Ava was social but very picky when it came to people she hadn’t ever met before. The way she gravitated toward Chance and, in turn, how Chance welcomed her with open arms made him feel silly about his reluctance to bring Ava along.
“Can she have some candy?” Chance chirped. Before Silas could answer, she had reached into her pocket and offered Ava an array of LifeSavers to choose from. “Now, are you going to be good while your dad and I work?” she asked Ava, nodding her head “yes” to steer the wide-eyed 1-year-old in the right direction. Returning the nod with a mischievous smirk, Ava grabbed a red piece of candy and struggled to break through its unyielding cellophane wrapper.
“Good!” Chance said, content that Ava would keep her promise. Ready to get to work she lifted Ava from her lap and placed her firmly in the adjacent chair. “Dad and I are going to need quiet, OK?” she explained. “Play with this pen and paper,” she insisted reaching into her bag and then placing the tools in front of Ava. As the toddler delighted in making a series of random lines, curves, and markings, she seemed much too engrossed in the task in front of her to be concerned with anything else.
“So,” Chance said, switching her attention back over to Silas and barely missing a beat. “I like how everything looks so far. I think we’re on the right track for a good submission,” she said, her eyes dancing. “Have you had a chance to read through it yet – from beginning to end?”
Silas couldn’t tell if time had chipped away Chance’s shell or if Ava had somehow melted it altogether, but he could sense a more mellow, warmer vibe radiating from the other side of the table. One that, quite notably, was missing during their very first conversation.
“No, not yet,” he admitted, “her mom was supposed to pick her up earlier today but – well – as you can see – that didn’t go as planned.”
“Ah!” Chance said. “Well, I’ve read it all the way through and I think we’re really close to the final draft - what we have is actually quite good.”
“That’s good to hear,” Silas said, registering her compliment with pride.
“Yeah – actually,” she began, looking over at Ava, “I think I can carry us over the goal line. It looks like you’ve got your hands full!”
“You sure?” Silas asked, feeling like a little bit of a slacker. “I can – “
“Yeah, I’m sure,” she continued, “All I’ve really got to do is buff the rough edges. The important parts are all there; at this point, it’s just a matter of connecting everything and making it coherent. Trust me – I got this!”
Silas smiled and thanked Chance for everything, truly grateful to have a solid partner.
“Bye cutie,” Chance said to Ava as Silas lowered her from the chair and grabbed her by the hand. Ava waved in return. “Hope to see you again real soon,” Chance remarked to Silas’ surprise.
“Soon,” Ava echoed with the vigor of learning a brand new word.
Chapter 5
“Students, I’ve got your assignments graded and ready to return!” Dr. Byrne announced as he marched into class – a little late as always – with an arm full of papers. “You’ll have to excuse me, I’m from the old school!” he said, sounding uncharacteristically embarrassed as he unloaded the marked packets onto his desk. “You’ll notice – over the course of the semester – that even when you submit your work online, I’ll always print it out and return a hard copy back to you!”
Silas looked at the stack of papers on the desk and wondered where his and Chance’s sat in the pile. Knowing that his fate was sitting right in front of him – and being fully aware of Dr. Byrne’s penchant for suspense – he felt so close but so far all at once.
“Nothing beats taking a red ink pen to paper,” Dr. Byrne continued on with a light chuckle, looking around the room, and realizing that he was the only person entertained by his musings.
“Okay, now that we’ve got that out of the way, let’s get to the matter at hand. When you hear your name, send one partner down to pick up your paper. “
Silas looked back to where Chance was sitting and gave her a thumbs up. Although the point of his gesture was to elect himself as the retrieving partner, he realized that it was somewhat ambiguous. She nodded her head in response, hopefully, Silas thought, in agreement with his suggestion.
“Now, in no certain order…” Dr. Byrne continued, right before skimming a couple of papers from the top of the stack and placing them in the crook of his arm, “…Sanders and Cho…”
As he watched the Professor call a series of names and then grab the next handful of submissions, Silas – once again – felt his anxiety begin to grow. In his mind, it was almost like he had been transported back to the week before when Dr. Byrne initially passed out the numbers, before he knew that his number would be seven, and before he knew who would complete his two-person team. This time, however, he had a partner to help him diffuse his nervous energy. Impatiently waiting to see what their grade would be, Silas looked towards the back of the room again and raised his eyebrows at Chance as soon as he got her attention. She responded with a shrug.
As the stack continued to dwindle, Silas ultimately became transfixed on the one paper left on the desk at the very end. Unless there was a mix-up and it hadn’t been turned in, that last paper had to belong to him and Chance. But, why was it last? Was it that good or that bad? The mystery of it all began to weigh heavily on Silas as he found himself waiting with bated breath.
“Ah, yes!” Dr. Byrne said, energetically, looking at the last paper on the desk. “When I announced, at the beginning of class, that I was returning the submissions in no certain order….well, that was only slightly true. I saved this one for last on purpose.”
Silas gulped.
“So, let me say this: there were quite a few really good submissions,” he started, as he walked from behind his desk to the front and had a seat on its edge. “But, there was one that stood out among the rest,” he continued before crossing his legs at the ankle. “The submission by Mr. Reams and Ms. Parker. This one stood out. Very well done!”
Silas peeked back at Chance, excited about their accomplishment. To his surprise, she was actually shrinking in her seat.
Dr. Byrne continued. “Their submission about Picasso’s The Tragedy was succinct, packed with good information, and…just a pleasure to read.” Dr. Byrne reached over to pick up the submission, walked over to Silas’ row, and handed the nearly flawless paper to him. “Mr. Ream, Ms. Parker – I’ve posted your paper online for everyone to see. Class, I want each of you to review it, as soon as possible, to see what I’m looking for and adjust accordingly for the next assignment.”
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Silas glimpsed at the paper and beamed.
“This was the only paper in the bunch that earned all 100 points,” Dr. Byrne said, walking back to the front of the class. “Again, well done! OK,” the Professor announced, ready to get the lesson started, “now….let’s get on with today’s discussion.”
While Dr. Byrne continued with the rest of the class, Silas was stuck in suspended animation. This Humanities assignment was one of the very first he’d had since returning to college and, by far, the most challenging to date. It was a team assignment and, at one point, he had to juggle caring for Ava in the midst of trying to get it done. In a very distinct way, very early on, he had actually had to confront some of the things that scared him the most all at once. The thing that blew his mind was that, despite all of the possibilities for setbacks and pitfalls, he was triumphant. In fact, his work was recognized as exemplary in front of his peers. Silas couldn’t help but hope this was a good indicator of what was to come.
As class went on, Silas eventually came back down to earth. Though it took a while, at some point, he floated down from the clouds, began to listen to the lecture again, and tried to take good notes. He convinced himself to get back in the game by remembering his time as a Center on the Junior Varsity Wildcat’s Basketball team. In those games, after scoring, he couldn’t just stand still and cheer after a basket went in. On the contrary, if he wanted to help his team win the game, he had to constantly keep moving, stay nimble, and play offense as well as defense. For whatever reason, that did the trick and, in no time, he was back to being fully engaged. But, it appeared, that he tuned back in just a little too late. Just as he had gotten back in the groove, class was over.
“Alright, that’s all I have for today. Unless there are any questions, class is dismissed!” Dr. Byrne announced after, what he thought, was a successful class session.
Before he could even finish his statement, everyone in the class started packing their bags and getting ready to leave. As quickly as he could, Silas made his way over to Chance. The path between them was filled with everything with congratulatory nods to outright sneers from his classmates. Either way, it didn’t faze Silas. The only approval he needed was from Dr. Byrne and Chance; based on the responses he’d received, he had been quite successful at garnering both.
“Wow, you must have really done a great job with the draft,” Silas grinned.
“I didn’t have to do much, really,” Chance said, briefly halting her packing process. “I’ll have to say, though. I think you were one of the best partners I’ve had in a long, long time.”
“Yeah?” Silas asked, his eyebrows furrowed. “Thanks!” he followed, his sense of accomplishment heightened that much more. He had set out to make a good impression and was just a little shocked that he was actually able to pull it off. Chance was a tough cookie!
“You’re welcome,” she said, “but facts are facts.”
“Hey,” Silas said, his ego bolstered by everything else that went right that day, “you want to go and grab some coffee or something?” He knew that he was stepping out on somewhat of a limb but he was interested to see how far he could take his good vibes.
“Sure,” Chance said, apparently without a second thought. “Let’s go!”
Silas’ eyes got big but only for a few seconds. He quickly gathered himself together and said, “Hey, let me carry that for you?” Feeling particularly chivalrous, Silas reached out and playfully beckoned for her bag.
Chance blushed as she clutched it closely. “No, thanks! I got it,” she said, inconspicuously impressed that he even offered.
Outside of the softness she showed toward Ava the Sunday prior and beyond the intrigue she directed toward The Tragedy at the art gallery, this was one of few times Chance displayed a human side. Most importantly, it was the only time Silas could remember that it was solely being directed at him.
As they left the classroom, then the building, and finally started on a direct trail to Starbucks, Chance and Silas danced around and then dove head-first into an intriguing conversation. Mere feet away from the coffeehouse, Silas made the potentially catastrophic decision to break from the light banter they were having and ask a real question that, presumably, had an uncomfortable answer.
“So, you know,” Silas started, “I noticed that you didn’t really like the attention Dr. Byrne gave us today – acknowledging that he thought our paper was really good in front of the entire class. What gives?”
Chance groaned as Silas opened the door for her and walked inside without a word.
“I’m listening,” Silas said, as they got in line, the aromatic scent of coffee filling his nostrils and awakening his senses.
“Well…” Chance began, facing him, oblivious to the fact that a cashier had just opened a new register.
“Actually,” Silas said, reluctantly putting their conversation on pause. “Hold that thought,” he insisted, motioning Chance over to the awaiting barista.
Shortly after Chance began to place her order, it was Silas’ turn. “Yeah, I’ll have a venti blond roast,” he began, stepping up to the register, “with a little extra room for cream, please.”
“I’m going to get us a table,” Chance said, with her coffee in one hand and a slice of pound cake in the other.
“OK,” he replied, reaching into his wallet to pay for his order.
Chance eyed the scene and scored a table in the corner. After adding his cream, Silas joined her there, ready to pick back up where they left off.
“So…” he cajoled, taking the seat right in front of her, closest to the wall.
“So….what?” Chance responded, looking genuinely confused.
“You know exactly what I’m talking about, Chance Parker,” he declared, not buying her act at all.
Chance took a sip of her coffee.
Silas sighed. “Whatever! I’ll bite. Tell me why you reacted to Dr. Byrne’s announcement about our work the way you did earlier. It looked like you were embarrassed by the attention, somewhat.”
Chance grimaced and pinched off a bit of her pound cake.
“Seriously, what’s wrong?” he probed. “I thought that whole thing was pretty cool, actually. Nerve-wracking, when it took him so long to get to us, but cool at the end.”
“Well,” she began, intermittently making eye-contact and looking off into space. “I don’t know. Sometimes – sometimes compliments are a little hard to take.”
“Hmmm, what do you mean?” Silas asked, leaning in slightly, attentive, and beyond ready to hear her answer.
“Mmm, I don’t know,” she said, clearly stalling. “I guess I’m saying that – sometimes – I don’t always feel like – like people really mean them.”
Silas cocked his head to the side, looking as if he wanted to follow-up, but unsure how. As he opened his mouth to speak, Chance interjected.
“I’m not sure how to say this, but,” she paused for a brief second, “I’ve just had people be nice to me all my life – not necessarily deservedly.”
“What do you mean? You think that people have just been kissing up to you?”
“Oh, I know it! I’m telling you. I can’t quite explain everything right now but…just take my word for it.”
Silas was confused and not sure where Chance was going.
“I don’t know,” Chance continued, taking a sip of her coffee, “I’m just thinking out loud.”
“Well, just knowing how you work and how high your standards are,” Silas exhaled, ready to change the subject, “I think Dr. Byrne’s reaction was probably well-deserved. I can’t wait to read the final copy!”
“I’m telling you – seriously – I didn’t have much to do after the draft we had by Sunday.”
“Well, I just want to thank you once again for taking over – that really helped a lot!”
“Yeah,” Chance said, “No problem! Ava’s a cutie and I can tell she’s a handful!”
Silas laughed, tickled at how spot on Chance had captured his favor
ite toddler.
Chance paused for a second, clearly unsure about whether she should say what was on her mind. “So, are you married?” she asked, looking directly into Silas’ eyes. “To Ava’s mother?” she clarified.
“Oh no,” Silas intoned. “We weren’t ever married. And, actually, the crazy thing is that Ava came at the tail end of our relationship.”
“Like right before you guys broke up?”
“Actually, after we broke up!” he admitted to a stunned Chance. “Yep! My ex, Kalyn, didn’t find out that she was carrying Ava until after we’d called it quits!”
“Wow!” she gasped, “how long had you been together?”
“Since our freshman year here at Stronghold. We dated for about three years.”
“That’s a long time!” Chance said.
“Yeah, it is! That’s already enough to make a break up hard. Add on top of that a surprise pregnancy and you’ve got us!”
Chance shook her head, trying her best to keep up with Silas’ story.
“We’re trying to stay on the up-and-up for Ava,” he said with a heavy sigh, “but it doesn’t always work out that way, though.”
“What do you mean?”
“Like Sunday,” he exhaled, “Kalyn was supposed to pick Ava up the day before; then I thought she would get back early Sunday morning – as you know, both of those things fell through.”
“Ah!” Chance said, nodding. Somewhere along the way, listening to Silas’ story, she had propped her elbow on the table and rested her chin in the palm of her hand.
“Yeah, I hadn’t planned to have her by the time we met. So, when I did, I was a little annoyed…well, a lot annoyed.”
“Mmm, I can see why you would feel that way,” she replied, “but it wasn’t a big deal to me. I’m glad I got a chance to meet her. She’s a doll!”
“Thanks, I wasn’t sure if you’d be OK with it.”
“I hadn’t expected her… I didn’t even know you had a daughter. But, all she needed was a pen and paper – and she was good to go! That….I can deal with!”