by J. R. Gray
“Take the water and stop being an idiot.” He turned toward me, and a tiny silver star pinned to his collar caught my eye. I knew I’d heard the voice before.
“Following me back to Harden?” I scoffed. What could I be to the Red Stars now that I’d been kicked out of the program?
“Friends aid friends.” He shoved the water in my face again, and I took it.
I drank down half the contents, and my headache eased. I hadn’t realized how thirsty I’d been. Finishing the bottle, I offered it back, and he waved it off.
“What aid could I need now?” I blew out a breath and laid my head back against the seat. I’d blown it all for a woman, and I would do it all again.
My heart ached. There wasn’t just a piece missing. The whole damn thing had been ripped from my chest, leaving a black hole in its wake.
“You threw away the chance of three generations to be with a girl.” He lowered his voice. “I’m guessing you want my help in seeing her again.”
My mouth fell open, and I stared at him.
“I thought it might get your attention.” He glanced around then leaned in, still speaking softly. “We are willing to help you, our brother.”
I knew I couldn’t say no if there was a way, but I bit my tongue, forcing myself to think through it rationally when I wanted to scream yes, I’d do anything. “What’s the catch?”
“As with the rest of the brotherhood, when we call on you to do something for us, you will do it.” He licked over his cracked lips, not wavering.
“So you people want me indebted to you?” My heart pounded in my chest, and I thought he could hear it over the rumble of the engines.
“Not at all. We want to use you to further our cause of course, but you have a say in the matter. We’ve found through the last century forcing our agenda will only leave us in ruin. When we have loyal supporters who will do anything for their brothers, that’s when we can affect real change, and we already have, Madden.” His voice was smooth, urging me into a false sense of security.
“I want the details.” I looked around to make sure no one was eavesdropping, but the few people on the transport were snoring.
He reached into the inside of his jacket, and when his hand reappeared he held the spider looking thing I’d used before. The weld marks were showing, which told me this wasn’t some factory made device. It was homemade somewhere. “It’s as easy as this and some minor set up. You’ve already seen how it can work.”
I held out my hand for it, and he dropped it into my palm. I picked it up to examine it. “Tell me how?”
His hand disappeared again. “Combined with this.” He now held up a tiny silver microchip. “Program it right and you can be anywhere, with her, you want.”
My mouth went dry. “How do I know this is at all safe?”
“Since our own council uses them, as we couldn’t be traveling all over drawing Empirical attention, we needed a way to have private meetings outside the scope of the Emperor on the nets. This is what we use smart guys like you for. They figure out a different way. Did you find it safe yourself?”
“Why would you share tech like this with me? It could mean your head if it falls into the wrong hands?” Jocelynn was in my grasp, but it sounded too good to be true. “That disk has got to be worth more than my life.”
“One, because this one can’t be linked back to us, and two, because, like I said, we need guys like you on our side. You know the reason you can’t be with the woman you love is because of the classes and how they keep your planet as a basic slave world.” He dropped the device into my hand. “Use your head. You gave the Baron a key to get around our raids. We can’t risk letting his side exploit you. We gain nothing by hurting you.”
He was right. They’d wanted me all along, and this just appeared to be an extra incentive to what I would have done anyway after the Baron had me deported. One thing struck home. I was worth more than I’d realized, and I had to use it to my advantage.
“How do I get it to her?” I closed my hand around it.
“We’ll take care of it. Just broach the subject, and we’ll get it into her suite.”
Both my brows rose. “You have that kind of reach?”
“You have no idea.” A crooked smile formed on his lips, showing off two silver teeth in his smile.
“Thanks.” My heart wouldn’t slow down. I wanted to get off this damn spacecraft and talk to her. Apologize and then see her.
“There are a few things you need to know.”
My eyes darted back to his. I knew it. “Go on.”
“Hosting the program isn’t easy. Because of the way we had to work it into the neuro receptors, there are a few things we are still trying to work out.” He kept his voice calm.
I growled. “If it’s dangerous, I won’t let her do it.”
“It won’t be as bad for her. Since the program uses your subconscious you will have to deal with the brunt of it. You already knew all of this.” I couldn’t read anything in his eyes. They were just as hard laying out the facts.
“That’s why he was in pain?”
“Yes.” He exhaled slowly before answering. The first real sign he gave me. “Our subconscious minds work out our fears and worries for us. Because we tap into it to from a matrix into the network, you have to fight through your own mind to make contact to the world we’ve created.”
I stared at him not quite understanding. It was more, or different than I expected. “Fight my own mind, what the hell?”
“To get to the world, one or both of you can write the program for the starter, which will be you. You will have to fight through your worst fears to make the connection. She’ll have some mild discomfort of facing a much shorter challenge, but you will carry the brunt of it,” he said. “There will also be a point where your mind will reject the program and kick you out. When it’s used too much this will happen more frequently, and it’s dangerous to use again before a forty-eight hour time period.”
I swallowed hard. My worst enemy was already my mind. “Dangerous how?”
“You can reject it for good, or your mind could become damaged if you try to force yourself back in too soon. When all the rules I’ve given you are followed, there are minimal risks. Like I said, our highest council has used the program regularly for the last five years.”
I nodded trying to take it all in. “How real is it?”
“You were there. You tell me.”
“I mean with her. I didn’t touch anymore while I was there.”
“You will think you’re really there. Your mind will be completely connected to the network. All input your brain will accept as real.”
I forced my face to remain blank.
He went on, “Every touch, every look, the whole program will seem real.”
“How can we write the program?” I wrung my hands.
“The information will be placed in your quarters before you return home this evening. With your mind you shouldn’t have trouble creating a reality for the two of you to enjoy.”
I was shocked at how fast they worked. “So, you assumed I would say yes, despite the pain involved?”
“If she means as much to you as you claim, nothing would keep you away.”
The ship dropped, and I knew we have broken through the atmosphere. I looked at him again, and he had turned away, pretending to be asleep.
I leaned forward pressing my forehead to the seat in front of me. If this worked I could at least see her. Touch her in my mind. It would have to be enough for now.
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Jocelynn
Two days had passed. Two days. I felt hollow. I hadn’t left my room in over a day, feigning illness. I’d avoided Jacob, clutching my communicator as I stared at the walls. I couldn’t eat or sleep, and one question haunted my mind. Was he dead? At first I’d wondered what I’d done. But his room was empty. I’d had Jacob check. He could be dead because of me. I wouldn’t put it past the Baron. I had to get my revenge. It w
as just a matter of biding my time.
A fist struck my door, causing me to jump. I looked up and then said, “Go away. I’m ill.”
They tried my knob, and it was still locked, which made me breathe easier. A low growl came from behind the door, telling me it was my brother there. I ignored it. Jacob barged into my room a moment later holding up a pick.
I scowled. “That is a brand new biometric lock. How the hell did you get past it?”
“Anything which can be locked, can be unlocked by hacking.”
I wanted to smack the smug expression off his face.
“I needed to make sure you were still alive.” He took a seat on the edge of my bed.
“You see I’m alive. I could have the plague. Leave.” I pulled my knees into my chest and pressed my face into them, hiding in my blankets.
He grabbed one end of my cover and yanked it away, leaving me exposed. “Well now that I see you’re alive and clearly not ill in the slightest, I am to tell you to make haste. You have a visitor.”
“There is no one I will see.”
“This you have no choice. You’re lucky the Baron isn’t here holding you down to paint your face.”
I looked up at him. “It can’t be. He was here not four days ago.”
“He has returned and has asked for you.”
I closed my eyes. My chest ached. To anyone else, the handsome son of the Emperor might be a good replacement for a man the Baron banished, but for me it made things worse. I knew he was a consolation prize.
“I guess I have no choice.” I had to put on a face. If they suspected my motives it would ruin my chance of finding him again.
“None, but if it makes you feel any better I wish he would bend me over.” He winked and climbed off my bed to grip himself.
I had to put on the mask I’d worn my whole life and fake it. I could do this. I would search for Madden to the ends of the known worlds and bring him back. Jacob had his secrets, and I would have mine. I just had to figure out how.
I wrinkled my nose as I stuck my tongue out. “You can have him.” I followed him out of the bedroom and went to my large wardrobe. “Tell me what to wear. I can’t be arsed with it.”
He pushed me aside and scavenged through, picking a shocking combination. They were my usual leather pants which the Baron hated and a light purple t-shirt, boasting an all lace back.
“Really?” I took them behind the screen before he could answer.
“You don’t want him to be attracted to you, so why do you care?” I could see his shadow through the divide, and he leaned against the wall looking entirely too smug.
I chose my words carefully. The Emperor’s son’s favor would afford me many more ways to find Madden than even my own rank. “Because maybe I should just get on with it. Better match than I’ll find anywhere else, and at least he’s funny.” I blew out my cheeks as I stepped out. “Do my hair?”
“What would you do without me?” Before I could respond he went on. “Be a ragged mess, that’s what.”
“At least I show up to my meetings and pay attention to state affairs,” I shot back. It was easy to fake things with my brother. To return to our banter, like my entire world hadn’t changed.
“But no one would pay you any attention if you went like you want to half the time.”
I growled at him, and he smirked.
Thirty minutes later, I stood at the private landing strip we reserved for dignitaries coming in secret. My brother flanked me on my left as we disembarked. The Baron and his full guard would have drawn too much attention to the arrival, not to mention he would be missed from his usual meetings, so it was just us. Phillip stalked down the gangplank, and his lips turned up into a foxy grin when his gaze landed on the pair of us. He was striking with blond hair that fell to his chin and violet eyes, a trait only still existing in the royal blood. Most of the rulers over the last two centuries had them, and Phillip was no different. It made me wonder if at birth the firstborn was rejected if it looked different.
He was tall, even taller than my brother, and thin. He had some muscle tone, but not the rugged look Madden had from hard labor. Phillip was soft from his lifestyle. When he approached he inclined his head at me, bending his knees to sink lower.
“You are all kindness.” I offered my hand as was customary and curtsied. “Why ever would you bow to me?”
“I will always bend a knee or be on them for you, my lady.” He met my eyes, and his smile had turned flirty.
I smiled in spite of myself, and he brought my hand to his lips to kiss it. “I must say, I do prefer men on their knees.”
His lips spread open to show off his gleaming white smile. “Men?” He placed a hand over his heart. “You crush me with words, lady. But I will not give up. I will have to revamp my advances and plan a trip to your winter castle.”
My mouth almost fell open. There would be no way to hide from his advances if he came to Gavin 9 with my family. “Determined are you?”
“Very.” He turned to my brother and extended a hand, which Jacob took. Phillip pulled him close and clapped him on the back. They lingered there a moment longer than necessary, and Phillip turned to speak into Jacob’s ear.
They broke apart, and Jacob laughed. “Who said I’m willing to help you?”
Phillip scoffed, “Is everyone against me?”
“Our father’s not,” Jacob shot back.
Phillip shuddered. “Thank you, no.”
I broke out laughing as he linked his arm through mine. We walked back inside and through the tunnels to the suite of rooms he would occupy while he was here.
“Now, what boring thing shall we do so I am seen all over Trenton with the two of you?” Phillip flashed a smile, and my mouth dropped open.
Jacob pushed his tongue into his cheek, reappraising him. “You weren’t kidding last trip, were you?”
Phillip shook his head slowly. “Not at all.”
I looked between them. “What did I miss?”
Jacob looked at me harshly. “While you were absent at the ball Phillip and I had a discussion about how tedious duty can be.”
“We share similar views on fucking off, as you call it,” Phillip cut in.
“I am all astonishment.” I looked at my brother. “I see you two had a lengthy talk.”
Phillip went on. “We had hours, and we agreed you took the brunt of it from your brother, but mine cannot do that. How lucky birth order and a matter of minutes can make you.”
“Indeed.” I didn’t know what else to say.
“Across all the great houses, and half the galaxy you two are the only pair I’ve found who don’t buy into the crap. Sure you put on faces, don’t we all, but more women who meet me are interested in my title than what comes out of my mouth.” His gaze bored into mine, and I thought I saw a hint of weariness behind them. “In fact, you’re the first lady who snuck off on me.”
I blushed a little. “My apology.”
He waved me off. “Don’t be. I’ve been thinking of it for days. I enjoy your company, but I’ve had too much bad company forced on me to understand the desire. So, I have a proposal. Give me another chance, my lady, and if I disappoint or you have no interest, I will take no offense to you fucking off as you will.”
For the second time in so many minutes he made me really smile. “Is this an offer of sorts?” I paused to choose my words. “I do not wish to soil our position in the eyes of the royal house.” I thought my words were candid enough, but I waited to see if my meaning came through.
He didn’t reply right away, turning to look out the window as he folded his hands behind his back. “I think I can speak for your brother when I say we will be a strong alliance.”
I looked to Jacob, and he nodded.
“You two did have a productive night.” He hadn’t answered my question, and since he seemed to be on good terms I decided to push it. “And the offer?”
He turned back around and took a step closer to me. There was a somethi
ng in his expression I couldn’t read. “I think it’s up to you. If you’ll have me.” He took my hands in his. “Now, tell me what you wish of me, and we will get the visual part of today done, then we can find some fuckery with your brother.”
I kept my hands in his, even though it felt like a betrayal. He was charming, regal in all the right ways, and he had a personality not wholly off-putting thus far. It was the best I could expect, and maybe I should take the offer standing right in front of me.
“What do you think, Jacob? What will please the Baron?”
“Shall we take a stroll through the ornate gardens? They will be packed with lovers at this hour since the weather is reasonable.” Jacob grinned. “Then I do think we need to play a drinking game.”
Phillip laced his fingers through mine and looked over at my brother. “Why does this sound like an utter disaster?”
“Because it usually is,” I laughed.
“Oh it will be. I am thinking blasters and swords. Losers drink.”
We were fully intoxicated by the time we returned to Phillip’s suite. I collapsed on the sofa, kicking my feet up. All of us were laughing and had been since my brother had downed more liquor and still outshot us both. Phillip discarded his suit coat and cufflinks on a table, then undid a few buttons on his shirt before rolling his sleeves.
“Much better.” He turned on me, cheeks rosy from the spirits, and he had a foxy look in his eyes. “I feel like a monkey done up as such.” He stalked forward and took a seat, then lay back resting his head in my lap. “Now, this is the view I’ve been waiting for all night.” He grinned ruefully.
I gasped and smacked his shoulder, uneasy with his position. “You are cut off.”
He rubbed the back of his head over my thighs. “Has anyone ever asked the two of you for a threesome?”
Jacob and I burst out laughing, and he said, “Is that why you’re after my sister?” He licked his lips. “Trying to get at me, eh?”
I laughed. “You two.”