He did nothing but stare out the window until late in the evening. He tried to figure out why Jason and Jerry had left Tampa so quickly. A lot of wild ideas ran through his head, but none of them were viable enough to get stuck there. The only thing left for him to do was go back to Tampa.
The following morning he booked a flight scheduled to leave later that afternoon. He figured once he arrived back in Tampa, he’d go find Candy and talk to her about Roxanne. She would tell him the truth. The whole truth. He counted on it anyway.
In the meantime, he needed to blow off some steam. A great way to do that, he figured, was a walk on the beach.
Casually, he strolled along the water’s edge with his hands in his pockets. Mainly directing his attention out over the water, he wondered what he was going to do now. Silently, he scolded himself for running off on this wild goose chase in the first place. This was definitely one of the dumber things he’d done in quite a while. Turning his attention back up the beach, he mindlessly stared straight ahead. Why did he have this compulsion to see Roxanne? And after all this time. For Christ’s sakes, she was married now. To him of all people. Still, Kirk felt an overwhelming need to see her again just to make sure she was okay.
Up the beach about fifty yards he saw a girl sunbathing. Her light brown hair and long slender legs reminded him of Roxanne.
Stop it! Kirk knew better than to compare other women to Roxanne. But ironically, the closer he got to this girl the more she looked like Roxanne. Less than twenty feet away, an eerie sensation swept over him. The resemblance was remarkable. Moving closer, the peculiar feeling turned to confusion. This girl was an exact replica of Roxanne. The more he looked at her the more he realized something—something that made no sense at all.
It was Roxanne.
This is impossible. Roxanne was in Florida. In a hospital. In a coma.
“Roxanne…” his weak tone shredded her name.
The girl opened her eyes and immediately shaded them from the glare of the sun.
Kirk had seen her eyes though. They definitely belonged to Roxanne. That violet-blue color was virtually impossible to replicate. He’d seen many try—and fail.
But this wasn’t possible. She was supposed to be in a hospital in Florida. What the hell was going on? “Roxanne?”
She sat up. “Do I know you?”
“Of course you know me.”
She covered her eyes with her sunglasses and then stood up. “I’m sorry.” She shook her head, sounding exasperated. “What’s your name?”
“It’s me. Kirk.”
She shook her head, saying, “I’m sorry, but I don’t know you.”
“Roxanne…Roxanne Simon? That’s your name, right?”
“Yes.” She agreed, but there wasn’t a single, solitary hint of recognition in her expression. She truly had no idea who Kirk was.
***
Part IV
***
Chapter 31
April
Seven Months Earlier
Almost a month after the overdose, Roxanne came out of the coma. When she did, she opened her eyes as if she’d been startled awake. Eyeing her surroundings, she quickly realized she was alone in a hospital room. She went to sit up, but was trapped by these wires leading to all sorts of contraptions.
What the hell’s going on?
A nurse walked into the room. “You’re awake!”
“What’s going on?” Roxanne asked. “Where am I?”
“You’re in the hospital. Do you know your name?”
“Well of course I know my name. It’s Roxanne. Roxanne Simon.”
“Do you know what year it is?”
“Look...” Roxanne wasn’t in the mood to play these silly games. “Why don’t you just tell me what happened? What am I doing here?”
“You had a little accident.”
“Oh, no...” Roxanne moaned, thinking the nurse meant car wreck.
“There’s no need to worry,” the nurse said. “I suppose you’re all right now.”
“When can I get out of here?”
“Your doctor will be the judge of that,” she said. “But your family’s going to be very happy that you’re awake...especially your husband.”
Husband? “That’s a pretty sick joke, considering my husband is dead.” Roxanne filled with repulsion. “Not funny. Not funny at all.”
“On the contrary, Ms. Simon. Frank Garrett is very much alive.”
Frank Garrett? Roxanne let the name rattle around in her head. But it meant nothing. “When is the doctor going to be here?” Maybe then she could get some straight answers.
“I’ll call Dr. Sterling directly.” The nurse left before Roxanne could make any further inquiries.
Roxanne remained in her bed and looked around from one blank wall to the next. She wasn’t asking for much. All she wanted to know was what was going on.
It felt like ages before the door opened again. This time, a guy stormed in, her doctor she presumed.
“Roxanne?”
“In the flesh.” She gave a little laugh. “Who are you?”
“It’s me...Jerry.” He thought he’d see a spark of hey-I’m-glad-to-see-you in her expression. But there was nothing. She stared at him with vacant eyes. A bad feeling washed over Jerry. “Don’t you know me?”
“Should I?”
“Yes. You should. I’ve been your doctor for six years.”
Roxanne shook her head. “I don’t think so.”
“Roxanne?” Jerry said cautiously. “Do you know where you are?”
“I’m in the hospital,” she said, a bit frustrated.
“But where?”
“Tennessee.” She shrugged. “Which reminds me…when can I get out of here?”
“Going somewhere?” he asked like a true shrink.
“Yes. As a matter of fact, I am.”
Jerry didn’t like the fact that she thought she was in Tennessee. He was also curious to know where was she in such a hurry to go. “Where are you going?” he asked casually.
She looked at him suspiciously. “Candy and I are going on a trip.”
“How old are you?” he asked pointedly, more afraid of this answer than any of her previous ones.
“Nineteen.”
That simple little word was such a bombshell. But he had to tell her the truth. “Roxanne...you’ve already taken that trip. You’re not in Tennessee. You’re in Florida.” He waited a moment, to give her time to let that sink in, then he continued, “You’re not nineteen. You’re twenty-seven.”
Roxanne stared at him like he was crazy. “Who’d you say you were?”
“I’m Dr. Jerry Sterling.”
“Are you sure you didn’t escape from the mental ward?” she asked half-seriously.
“You really don’t have any idea who I am, do you?”
“I don’t know you,” she said firmly.
“What’s the last thing you remember?”
“I told you that already.” She sucked in a breath and held it for a moment. “Candy and I are going on a trip.”
“I know this is a very hard thing for you to comprehend,” he said. “But like I’ve already told you…you’re in Florida. You’re twenty-seven years old. You have a very lucrative career as a best-selling author, and you’re an award-winning actress.” He stopped to catch his breath. How much was too much information at this point? But Jerry had to set her straight. He had to bring her back to 1989. “You’re married to a rock star. Frank Garrett. And the two of you have a five year old son named Frankie.” He wrapped up the past eight years in a nutshell.
She found the notion that she could be a writer or an actress, much less best-selling or award-winning, absolutely ludicrous. She was no actress. She knew that. Sure, she liked to write, but she was too afraid of rejection to consider letting anyone look at her work. And married to a rock star? That was an even bigger one to swallow, right along with the notion that she had a kid. It wasn’t a real big secret and everybody knew it—Roxanne Si
mon was not the motherly type.
“I don’t buy it,” she finally said.
“There’s more.”
“Really?” She laughed, feeling vulnerable.
“Do you want me to tell you why you’re here in the hospital?”
“Oh, enlighten me, please,” she remarked a bit snidely, and regretted it as soon as the words left her mouth.
“You tried to kill yourself.” He sounded serious and that bothered her. “You plotted and planned your demise in great detail for months.”
“I have just one question for you...” Roxanne paused long enough to make sure she had his attention. “If this is all true like you say, and my life was so great…” She didn’t buy the bill of goods this doctor was trying to sell. “Then why on earth would I try to kill myself?”
“Your life is very complicated. It hasn’t been as easy as it sounds.”
“Supposing that I’m willing to give your little story the benefit of the doubt…can you prove any of it?”
“Well, I could bring in the books you’ve written. I could bring in the movies you’ve starred in. I could even bring you a video tape of your wedding, as well as your marriage license. I could bring you pictures of your son and his birth certificate.”
“Stop it!” Roxanne had heard enough. None of this stuff sounded right. “Then why don’t I remember any of it?”
He sighed deeply before answering. “Your relationship with Frank Garrett has been less than successful. I’d theorize that your mind has decided to block out all existence of him. Unfortunately, the only way to do that is wipe out your entire memory of the time you’ve known him.” Jerry shook his head. The truth wasn’t pretty. “Regrettably, everything else gets wiped out, too.”
“If I hated him that much—” She questioned no one in particular. “—then why in the hell did I marry him in the first place?”
“I don’t think it was a case of hate at all.” He gave his opinion. “But I think your love for Frank Garrett was overshadowed by the thought of losing him, and it tore you apart.”
The thought that maybe the doctor was telling the truth crossed Roxanne’s mind. If that were the case, then she had a five-year-old son out there somewhere. A son she couldn’t remember. And God knows she never wanted to be anybody’s mother—not that she could remember. Chuck’s mother used to say Roxanne didn’t really love Chuck because she refused to have his children. She thought she’d loved Chuck, but still, having a kid was the last thing she wanted. But now, here this guy was, telling her she did have a child.
“Would you excuse me for a moment?” she asked softly, unable to hide the anxiety seeping out in her voice.
Roxanne got up and took slow, careful steps toward the bathroom. Once inside, she closed the door. If it turned out to be true...if she had given birth, then the evidence should be there on her stomach. Slowly she lifted her hospital gown, afraid of what she might find. Looking down at her tummy, she saw faint stretch marks. She released the gown and it fell back down over her knees.
Roxanne’s gaze traveled up the wall. A mirror entered her peripheral vision. She turned toward it and stared at herself. While her face wasn’t marked with any tell-tell lines, clearly she was much more mature than she remembered.
Suddenly Roxanne was afraid of what she’d become, professionally and mentally. She also feared the thought of a husband she couldn’t remember. It sounded like he might’ve had a little too much control over her. After all, according to the doc outside, she’d tried to kill herself because of him. But the thing that bothered her most of all was the fact that she was supposed to be somebody’s mother. And because she couldn’t remember ever wanting to be a mother, she didn’t think she had what it took. Otherwise, she would never have pulled a stunt like this. With no forethought whatsoever, regarding the consequences of leaving a child motherless. She obviously hadn’t thought about that, because if she had, she never would have done something so cold and cruel. So heartless.
What have I done?
Roxanne went back out into the room and sat down on the edge of the bed. “What about Candy? Where is she?”
“She’s in Tampa,” he said. “And she’s very worried about you.”
“But how is she?” Roxanne wanted more. “What’s become of her life?”
“Well, like you, she’s an award-winning actress.”
That news pleased Roxanne. She smiled. She could easily believe Candy was a successful actress. Yep, she could definitely see that. “Is she married? Does she have a family?”
“Well, no. But she is very close to your husband’s partner.”
Roxanne told herself that surely Candy must be happy.
“Well I suppose we should give them a call,” Jerry said. “They’re all going to be very happy to learn that you’re awake. And Frank…well, Frank is going to be very eager to see you.”
That thought scared her half to death. “No,” she objected quickly. “I can’t see them.”
“You don’t want to see your family?” he asked, letting his confusion shine through.
“You don’t understand,” she said “I don’t remember them. I can’t see them. I wouldn’t know what to say or do.”
“Okay, okay.” Jerry didn’t want her getting too upset over this. “If you can’t face seeing them right now, that’s okay.”
“You have to promise me that I won’t have to see them.” She looked like a frightened child.
“Don’t worry, you won’t have to face anybody until you’re ready.”
Jerry did contact Jason, and they both decided that humoring Roxanne would be the best course of action, at least for the time being. They also knew that if Frank Garrett had the slightest inkling Roxanne was awake, nothing or no one could keep him away.
With a bit of reluctance, they decided to let everyone continue to think she was still in the coma. Everyone, including Candy. But to pull that one off, they had to keep all of them away from Roxanne. That’s when Jason came up with the idea of a legal document to fix the problem. They paid the hospital dearly to carry on as if Roxanne was still there and in a coma.
Meanwhile, Jason and Jerry got Roxanne out of the country, where she was less likely to be recognized. If the news of her recovery got out, Frank would be more overbearing than ever.
The bottom line was that Roxanne just wasn’t ready for Frank Garrett.
***
Chapter 32
Seven Months Later
Kirk followed Roxanne as she headed for the house directly behind them. Leaving the beach, she punched in a security code and passed through a gate leading into someone’s lush, private digs. Kirk couldn’t help but eye the Olympic-sized swimming pool as they passed it by, thinking it was a bit of a waste since the beach was steps away.
“I’m sorry I don’t remember you,” she said. “You said we were in a movie together?”
“Yes.” Kirk followed her toward the house. “Your first.”
Even though she’d been told about the past eight years in great detail, over and over again, she still had a hard time keeping it all together and inside her head. Her brain had shut out the information and it seemed determined not to take any of it back in again.
“I’ve got the movies on video,” she said. “But I haven’t worked up the nerve to watch them yet.” She almost laughed at herself.
“I get that. I have trouble watching footage of myself too.” Kirk cleared his throat. “Roxanne, how is it that you came to be here?”
Slowly, he came to the realization that she had some form of amnesia. Yet, at the same time he was totally confused.
She opened the slider and stepped inside the house. “I think Jason and Jerry can explain that better than me.”
Jason and Jerry. Of course. He’d forgotten all about them.
“Kirk!” Jason and Jerry blurted his name in unison.
“You!” Kirk belted out. “What the hell are you two doing here?” Finally, reality smacked him in the face.
“This is my home,” Jason said, as if he owed Kirk nothing.
“I want to know what’s going on,” Kirk insisted. “And I want to know now.”
“All right, Kirk,” Jerry said. “You want to know what’s going on...have a seat. It’s a long story.”
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