Frankie knew. Frank closed his eyes. And I didn’t listen. But Frank didn’t have time to beat himself up over that. Right now he had to deal with the two men standing before him. They’d let the whole family believe the worst of Roxanne’s condition. Never mind him and Candy, they’d put a child through holy hell.
The old Frank would have seen to it that they paid for that, but the new Frank had more important things to consider. He opened his eyes and tossed a hard glare at Jason and Jerry. “After what you’ve put my son through these past few months, it wouldn’t take any effort from me at all to kill you both.” He shook his head and collected his anger. “There’s only one thing that’s stopping me…you know where she is. But you’re going to take me to her.”
“Yes, we are.” Jason nodded. “But only because she’s ready to see you now.”
“Wait a minute!” Candy shouted. “Jason, how could you do this to me? How could you, of all people, lie to me?”
“Candy, it wasn’t something I took great pleasure in doing,” he assured her.
“But you did. You let me think my sister was lying somewhere helplessly in a coma. You let me think that for months.” Her tone stayed calm, but contempt carried her words. “I’ll never forgive you for that.”
“Candy…I truly am sorry.”
His apology didn’t carry much weight with Candy. She’d been betrayed by both Jason and Jerry. She vowed never to forgive either of them as long as she lived.
Roxanne had told herself that even though Candy and the others were on an airplane right now headed for Jamaica, that eventually, maybe after she’d eaten, she’d calm down. That didn’t happen.
She began pacing the length of the patio. It wouldn’t be long now. What was she going to say to them? How could she possibly explain herself?
“Just try to remember,” Kirk said. “They all care about you.”
“I keep trying to tell myself that.” She laughed nervously.
“Do you want me to leave?” he asked. “Before they arrive?”
“No.” She shook her head. “You can’t leave.”
“All right. I’ll stay with you if that’s what you want.”
Kirk was the only comforting thing she had to hold onto from a totally foreign past. She told herself she couldn’t face any of them without Kirk to fall back on. She hadn’t considered how Frank might react when he found out Kirk Bronson was there, too.
***
Chapter 33
The library was Roxanne’s favorite room in Jason’s house. Maybe because of all the books. Thousands of them lined the walls, and she felt she could somehow identify with each and every one. It wasn’t hard to make the decision to wait for Candy in the room that brought her so much comfort.
Anxiety rippled through Roxanne as Candy came in and closed the door. They looked at each other and Roxanne studied Candy’s face intently.
After a brief moment of hesitation, Candy rushed toward her. “Rocky...” She embraced her. “Thank God you’re okay.”
“Candy…” Roxanne’s voice was weaker than she’d anticipated. “I’m sorry,” she said. “I really am.”
Candy backed up a couple of steps and dragged her hair out of her face. “You can’t remember anything?”
Roxanne shook her head. “No.” She really wanted to change the subject. “How are you though?”
“I’m good.” Candy smiled. “Rich and I got married.” A look came over her that said she’d realized, a little too late, that the info probably wouldn’t mean much to Roxanne.
“Are you happy?” Roxanne asked, because that was, after all, all that mattered.
“Yes.” She nodded. “We are.”
“Is he worthy of my sister?”
“You’d be really happy about it...if you could remember him.”
“Speaking of husbands...” Cautiously, Roxanne brought up the subject of hers.
“You want me to tell you about Frank?” Candy asked knowingly.
Roxanne nodded. “Did I love him?”
“Yes. More than you knew how to deal with.”
“And did he love me?”
Candy’s reply came quickly and definitely. “Frank loves you more than anything in this world.”
“Then—” Roxanne chose her words carefully. “—why did I try to kill myself?”
“Well, I’m not going to lie to you and tell you that your relationship with Frank was picture-perfect. It wasn’t. There were misunderstandings between you two, and things got really complicated … but I think you should probably get these answers from Frank.”
“I’m afraid of him.”
“Afraid of Frank?” Candy flashed her a puzzled look. “Why?”
“Well…something about him made me crazy.” She voiced her fears. “What if it happens again?”
“It won’t happen again,” Candy said.
“You sound so sure of that.”
“I am.” Candy paused, thinking. “Can I ask you a question, though?”
“Sure.”
“Why didn’t you at least let me know you were awake?”
“It wouldn’t have been right for me to put you in that position.”
“Why?” Candy seemed to be struggling with that notion. “I would have kept your secret.”
“I know you would have. And that wouldn’t have been fair to you and your loyalty to Rich, or Frank for that matter.” Roxanne pushed aside her anxiety. “From what I understand... I’ve already put you in that position too many times in the past, and I’m sorry I did that to you.”
“I did what I did.” Candy accepted full responsibility for her actions. “I did what I had to do.”
“I’m sorry if I’ve hurt you.”
Candy wasn’t going to spend too much time fretting over things that had already happened. Instead, she preferred to seek out a way to bring Roxanne’s memory back. “What’s the last thing you remember?”
“The last thing I remember is that you and I were getting ready to leave Tennessee to start a new life somewhere else.”
“You don’t recall the trip to Florida?”
“I don’t remember leaving Tennessee,” Roxanne said. “I only remember preparing to leave.”
“Well…I will tell you this much about Frank Garrett,” Candy said. “The first night we were in Tampa, we went to this club called The Other Place. You met Frank that night…and to be honest with you...you two were smitten with each other from the very beginning.”
Roxanne tried to imagine what it might feel like to be so infatuated with someone. Sure, she’d loved Chuck, but keeping their hands off one another had never been an issue for Roxanne and her first husband.
“I wish I could remember,” Roxanne said. “But Jerry says too much time has gone by. He says it’s not likely that I’ll ever regain the memories I’ve lost.”
“Then make new ones,” Candy suggested simply. “And you can start now. Cause if I know Frank, he’s probably out there having a hissy-fit right about now.” She laughed softly. “Are you ready to see him?”
“Well I guess I’m about as ready as I’ll ever be,” Roxanne said with little enthusiasm.
Frank had been pacing the living room ever since Candy had disappeared into the library. He was tired of waiting for his turn. “What the hell are they doing in there? Is Candy giving her a play-by-play account of the past eight years, or what?” He spat his frustrations out at no one in particular. “I’m her husband. I’m the one who should be in there with her.”
“Keep your shorts on, Frank.” Candy came in. “She’s ready to see you now.”
He looked at Candy, already regretting his outburst. “I’m sorry.”
“Don’t give it a second thought.” Candy latched onto his arm and led him into the hallway. “Frank…If you want to keep Roxanne,” she advised. “If I were you, I’d tell her the truth when she asks you for it. And believe me, she will ask.”
“Okay,” he said somberly.
“And just remember one thing....�
��
“What’s that?”
“She doesn’t remember you.”
That notion scared Frank. “Candy...?” he said with uncertainty. “If she doesn’t remember me, then she doesn’t love me anymore, does she?”
“But if she loved you once, Frank,” Candy said. “She can love you again.”
Frank tapped on the library door, waited a couple of seconds and then opened it. Seeing Roxanne standing on the other side of the room with her back to him—she was looking out the window—he sighed, relieved.
He stood in the doorway for a second and thanked his lucky stars because he’d been so afraid she would never wake up. Finally, he moved halfway across the room and stopped, leaning against the edge of the desk.
She made no attempt to move or turn around to acknowledge his presence. Did she hear him come in? Frank cleared his throat.
Roxanne was well aware that he was there. She was afraid to turn around to look at him. Terrified that with one look she might revert back to her old self again.
But she had to look at him sooner or later. She really didn’t have a choice. When she finally did turn around, she saw a smile cross his face.
While she couldn’t explain it, she felt comforted by his presence. She felt an uncertain familiarity about him, too. She could almost swear she knew him from somewhere, but she just couldn’t place him. Even so, she felt an overwhelming need to go to him. She didn’t understand that at all because she couldn’t recall a single memory of him. That was basically it in a nutshell— she didn’t know this guy. Sure, they all said he was her husband, but she definitely had to take their word for that one. The only thing she could be truly certain of was that he’d driven her to the point of suicide. Her better judgment told her she couldn’t afford to let that happen again. Next time, she might succeed.
Finally, Roxanne pushed herself to walk toward him.
“Tell me that you know me?” he said in a pleading way.
She propped herself beside him on the desk. “I wish I could.” She studied his face. “But, no—” She shook her head. “—I don’t.”
“So how are you otherwise?” He turned his concern to her welfare. “You’re physical health is not in danger, is it?” he added, clearly needing reassurance.
“I’m okay.” A wave of reticence brushed through her at the thought of someone being so concerned about her well-being.
“I want you to come home, Roxie,” he said. “You belong with me and Frankie.” His words were more of a plea than anything else. He was not the demanding Frank she’d heard so much about.
She looked into his eyes, sensing the guilt and pain he’d burdened himself with. Instantly, she got the feeling she shouldn’t be able to see his eyes. She peered at him with a scrutinizing look.
“What’s wrong?” he asked uneasily, picking up on her anxiety.
“Why do I feel like I shouldn’t be able to see your eyes?”
“Shouldn’t see my eyes?” he repeated her words, searching his mind for a reason. Then he remembered his shades. “My sunglasses. I used to wear them all the time. You could never see my eyes and that always bothered you.”
Her expression didn’t change, but he got the feeling she’d accepted his explanation. She sucked in a breath, and asked, “Do you know why I did this to myself?”
“Yes.” He nodded. “You did it because of me. I drove you to it…but I swear to you, I never wanted this to happen.”
“I want you to tell me the truth about us. Don’t hold anything back.”
“All right,” he said. “But first you have to promise me that you’ll believe me when I say I don’t feel that way anymore.”
“If you really mean it...then I’ll believe it.”
“When you disappeared without a word, I didn’t know what to think,” he said. “And while it’s true, we weren’t exactly happy with one another at that point…but I loved you. I looked for you, but I couldn’t find you. And Candy wasn’t any help either.” Frank’s frustration escaped in his voice. “You surfaced through the press about a year later, and then I heard you’d had a baby, and Kirk Bronson had publicly claimed to be the father. You didn’t deny it, so I figured it must be true. I thought you were having an affair with him behind my back, and that you’d left me for him.” He paused, trying to cover the hurt he was still feeling over the lie. “I spent more than four years believing my son belonged to another man. A man you’d walked out on me for. No hi, bye, kiss my ass, or nothing…and I hated you for that. I hated you for Kirk Bronson, and when I found out the truth, I hated you for that, too,” he said. “I spent five long years thinking you’d betrayed me, and when I found out differently I felt even more betrayed. I wanted to punish you. I wanted to make you pay for what you’d done to me.” His jaw tightened. He wasn’t comfortable with the words he was saying now. “And when I found out about your mental instability, I decided to use it in my favor. I had no idea how serious it really was. I just figured I could use it as a means to get custody of Frankie. I wanted to take him away from you, just like you’d taken him from me.” Frank wondered if exposing the whole truth would take Roxanne too far out of his reach. “But I swear to you, I never wanted this to happen. In fact, after about six months of being married to you and trying to punish you, I finally realized I was wrong.” He wanted her to know he was trying to apologize to her that night she’d taken the overdose. “I finally accepted the fact that I could never hate you more than I love you. That night...I was coming home to tell you how sorry I was. And that I just wanted us to put the past behind us, and try to be happy with each other again…like we were in the beginning.” Frank laughed at himself. “But as usual, I’m always a day late and a dollar short.”
“I was a terrible person.” Her tone and her expression were dripping with disdain. “I don’t understand how I could have put any of you through the things I did...and I’m thoroughly ashamed of myself.” She moved away from him, back to the window where she stared outside. “That’s why I haven’t had the nerve to face any of you. Especially you.”
“It wasn’t your fault,” he told her. “I’m the one to blame.”
“How could you love someone like me?” From what Roxanne was hearing, she didn’t deserve his love or his loyalty.
Frank pushed himself off the desk and went to her side. “It’s not a hard thing to do.” He smiled softly and touched her cheek.
Chills rushed through her. Even though she couldn’t remember a single thing about him, she felt herself growing weak against his touch. She wasn’t overlooking the fact that he might be telling the truth when he said he didn’t feel hatred toward her anymore. Still, she was afraid of him and what he could do. Apparently, he had the power to drive her over the edge. If it had happened once, who’s to say it wouldn’t happen again?
“I’ve got to tell you, Frankie...” She wanted to let him know Kirk was there.
“What’d you call me?” Frank asked quickly.
“I don’t know…Frankie? Is that wrong?” Her tone grew agitated. “I’m sorry.”
“No, it’s not wrong. It’s exactly right,” he said, happier now. “You always called me Frankie. In fact, you’re the only one who ever did.”
“I did?” She wished she could remember something. Anything about this familiar stranger.
“Listen, we have all the time in the world for me to tell you about us,” he said. “But right now, there’s a little boy out there who really needs to see his mother.”
Fear swept over Roxanne. “Would you come with me?”
“Of course, I will.” He smiled, took her by the hand and led her out to the terrace.
Outside, she saw a little boy sitting on the ground with his back to them. He was playing with something. Cars maybe. He looked like he was about five or six.
“Hey, Frankie,” Frank called to him. “Look who’s here.”
Frankie turned around and his eyes lit up when he saw Roxanne. “Mommy!” He jumped up, flew into her arms and im
mediately started crying.
Roxanne held on to him, trying to bring him comfort. “Sweetie, don’t cry.” She was filled with remorse at the sound of his tears. “It’s okay. Mommy’s here now. Mommy’s here and I’ll never leave you again.”
Frankie didn’t say anything, he just held onto her as tightly as his little arms would allow. He tried to hold back the tears, which resulted in little whimpers every now and then.
Roxanne took Frankie and sat down in a nearby chair. She swayed back and forth, as if to rock him to sleep, and kissed the top of his head while caressing his back soothingly.
She didn’t say anything. She just sat there for the longest time, holding him securely in her arms. How she could have ever forgotten him? Silent tears fell from her eyes.
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