“Was it hard for you?”
This was a little too much. “Let’s just say that it gets easier. You get your own routine. It’s different. It’s not better or worse, just different,” she lied. She was still hurting, but it wasn’t something she would tell just anyone. She definitely wasn’t about to tell Jessa.
“Well, maybe we could hang out some time. I really need a friend right now.”
“Jessa, you have plenty of friends.”
“Yeah, and none of them understand me. They think that this package is all there is. I’m more than a pretty face. I feel too.”
Maybe she was on the up and up. Carson was afraid that she had judged Jessa too quickly. Too harshly. In this moment, maybe she was seeing the real Jessa, the one who hurt just like everyone else.
“Okay, Friday night. Let’s hang. You can come over after school.”
Carson was happy that they had finally come to some workable arrangement. She hated making enemies. It just wasn’t her thing. She would rather have peace. Now Jessa was coming to her house on Friday. She would be the first person Carson entertained at home from her new school.
When Carson got in her mom’s car on Friday, she knew that she had made a mistake. Jessa was used to riding around in her mom’s Range Rover or her dad’s Mercedes, not a beat-up old Honda Accord.
Jessa was on the way to the car. No DVD. No satellite radio. No navigation. It was embarrassing. Jessa jumped in the back seat, greeted Mrs. Roberts politely, and they were ready to go.
Not as painful as I thought, Carson thought to herself. Allowing Jessa to see their home didn’t seem so bad.
“We’ll be in my room, Mom,” Carson yelled as soon as they walked through the door.
“Can I get you girls a snack?” She could tell that her mother was excited she was making friends at Summit. But Carson was still trying to wrap her brain around the fact that the most popular girl in school was at her house. She hadn’t told anyone that Jessa was coming over, not even Emma or Mai. They would surely call her a fool.
“We will get something later, Mom. Don’t worry about us.” She turned her attention back to Jessa, who was looking at old pictures and learning way more about her family than she would have liked. “What do you like to do?” Carson asked her.
“I just listen to music and zone out at home.” She studied one picture from Carson’s dresser. “Is this your dad?” she asked. Carson nodded her head. “My parents are a trip, Carson. You have no clue. Sometimes I just want to escape all their drama. I go to my friends’ houses in the neighborhood. I’m never home anymore. When I am, I try to stay invisible.”
“What do they think about that?” Carson asked her. Even during her parents’ hardest years, they made sure their daughter always came first.
“They couldn’t care less. They don’t even know that I’m over here now. I’ll text my mom and let her know when she can come and get me.”
Wow! Carson thought. She thought that Jessa had it all, but now she realized that she had her all wrong. Her house was bigger. Her car was bigger. But so were her problems. Her little two-bedroom house and singleparent family didn’t seem so bad after all.
They were interrupted by a knock on her bedroom door. It was Jody. “Hey, darling. You free?” she asked half-knocking and half-entering.
Jessa looked like she had seen a ghost as Jody entered in her basketball shorts and freshly Bantu-knotted hair. It made Carson’s heart smile, but she could tell that her guest was uncomfortable.
Jessa didn’t say a word until Jody spoke to her. “What’s up? Who are you?”
“Me, oh, nothing. I mean … I’m Jessa,” she said, visibly shaken. She was a long way from her beachfront property. She was on Carson’s turf and starting to feel it.
“Oh, so you’re Jessa. I’ve heard a lot about you,” Jody said, dripping sarcasm.
“Oh?” Jessa looked worried. She knew that it couldn’t be good.
“Carson, can I talk you for a second in private?” Carson and Jody walked out to the front yard. “What in the heck is Jessa doing in your bedroom?”
“I’m just helping her through some things. That’s all.”
“I’m not buying it at all. Just be careful. There’s something in her eyes. That girl is trouble.”
“Everyone says that. She’s just misunderstood.” She was starting to sound like Holden.
“I’m not buying that.”
“Carson!” her mother yelled out the front door. She knew that look.
“Hey, I better go. We’ll talk. Don’t worry about me. I’m a big girl.”
“Yeah, I’m bigger. Make sure she knows that she has to deal with me if anything happens to you.”
They gave each other their signature dap and parted ways.
“Don’t be rude to your guest,” her mother whispered, ushering her back into the house.
She walked into her room just as Jessa was shutting down Carson’s Friender page. She looked guilty. She had been caught red-handed.
Chapter 7
Let Me Tell You
Were you logged on to my Friender account?” Carson asked through narrowed eyes.
“Why would I be on your Friender account? I was checking my messages. I was just letting my mom know where to come and pick me up. I gave her your address. Is that okay with you?”
Carson could tell that Jessa was offended. She didn’t mean to accuse her of anything sinister. But after talking to Jody, she was a little more guarded. Now she felt bad for making her guest uneasy.
“My bad, Jessa … it’s just, people keep warning me about being friends with you.”
Jessa eyes began to fill with tears. “Seriously, people treat me like I slap babies or something. Why do they always assume the worst about me?”
“I don’t think that you’re bad. That wasn’t fair of me. I’m sorry.”
“No worries. What’s up with those snacks your mom was talking about.”
“Good idea. Let’s go raid the kitchen.” They found a tray of croissant sandwiches, cookies, cupcakes, and fruit. It looked as though a deli had just delivered their goodies.
“Your mom is the truth!” Jessa said, looking at the spread Mrs. Roberts had prepared.
They took their food to the bedroom. Carson introduced Jessa to some of her favorite music on MyTube. They tried to do the latest dances but wound up looking like they were in pain. They laughed at their reflections in the mirror so hard they both tumbled over on Carson’s bed.
Just as they recovered from their fit of laughter, the doorbell rang. It was Mrs. McCain. She looked like Malibu Barbie, perfectly tanned.
She was different from the woman Carson had pictured in her head. She looked like she didn’t have a care in the world. The huge diamond on her finger looked as though it would cause her hand to cramp from its weight.
She wore white shorts and a flowing blouse that probably came from a fancy boutique. A place Carson’s mother could only dream about shopping at. She was the picture of perfection and looked completely out of place in the Roberts’s home.
When she spoke, she sounded like a reallife Texas girl, the kind depicted on the big screen. Her Southern drawl was enchanting. “Mrs. Roberts, thank you so much for letting Jessa come over. I wish she would have let me know, though.” She shot Jessa a glance.
Jessa rolled her eyes, dismissing her mother’s disapproval. “Hey, call me later this weekend,” she said to Carson. “We’re going to hang out at the mall if you want to join us.”
“That’d be awesome!” Carson was so excited. She couldn’t believe Jessa and her friends wanted to hang out with her. Even back at her old school, she wasn’t in the popular clique. She had her core four and no more. But now she was venturing into unfamiliar territory.
The girls hugged each other. Carson could see her mom’s elation when they left. “Oh my goodness, Carson. That’s why I sent you to SMS. Do you see how doors are just going to fly open for you? Those are the types of friends you need. I rea
lly like Jessa. Her mom is so beautiful.”
“Yeah, Jessa said she used to be a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader back in the day. She didn’t seem too stuck-up by it, though.”
“Jessa’s dad basically runs Texsun City. He’s the plant manager at the largest refinery out here, Texsun Oil. Imagine you working there, my baby.”
“Mom, you are way over-the-top. You just met Jessa.”
“I just want the best for you,” her mom replied.
Carson retreated to her room. So much had happened in the past few days. Now she was actually going to hang out at the mall with the school It Girls. It was like she was living a dream or something. She just wished her mother would slow down on planning her future.
The next day she got dropped off at the mall for her fun day. She texted Jessa to see where she was. But she never received a reply. She searched the usual hangouts by the theater, food court, and arcade. But Jessa and her crew were nowhere to be found.
Carson tried calling Jessa’s phone, but she went straight to voice mail. Just when she had given up, she spotted Jessa and her friends walking around, giggling with some boys Carson didn’t recognize.
“Jessa!” she yelled, waving.
“Hey, Carson! I thought you were supposed to meet up with us an hour ago.”
“I’ve been texting and calling you for nearly an hour.”
“Oh? I didn’t get anything.” She opened her gray cell phone case covered with bling. “Aw, look. I did get a couple of messages. We were having so much fun. I must not have heard.”
Carson could see all of Jessa’s friends laughing behind her. Monroe was the first to speak, “Come on, Jessa. We’re going to miss the movie.”
“Hold on. Geez!” She rolled her eyes and turned back to Carson. “You want to come to the movie with us?”
“I didn’t bring enough money. My mom will be here in about thirty minutes.”
“All fixable. My treat. Text your mom and let her know that the movie lets out at nine thirty. Cool?”
Carson smiled. “Sure! Let’s go.”
Carson sat between Monroe and Harper in the theater. She thought that Jessa would sit next to her, but she was on the far end. Neither Monroe nor Harper paid any attention to her. She felt left out as they laughed at the movie and cracked private jokes across her lap.
Seriously, I should have just gone home.
When the movie was over, she’d had enough. Then Jessa rushed up and grabbed her. “Wasn’t that awesome? I want a boyfriend just like Cash. He was to die for.”
“He was a cutie,” Carson admitted. She was still salty that Jessa didn’t sit by her. But how could she stay mad when Jessa was so excited? “Hey, my mom’s already out front. I’ll catch up with you later.”
She ran ahead to get in the car but could hear someone calling her name. “Carson! Carson!” She turned around to find Holden smiling widely. “Did you just come out of the theater?”
“Yeah,” she said, looking to see if Jessa could see her. She didn’t want her new friend getting mad at her again.
“That part when Cash pulled that practical joke on—”
She cut him off abruptly. She wanted to get far away from him before Jessa walked out. “Hey, my mom’s right there. I have to run.”
“Okay. Call me later!” he yelled
She was horrified. Monroe and Harper were coming out of the door just as Holden yelled. They looked at her as if she had just committed the ultimate sin. Jessa, Tyson, and Drew were right behind them. She could tell that they were filling Jessa in on what they had heard. The five girls peered at Carson as she got into her mom’s car.
“Did you have fun?” her mother asked excitedly.
“I don’t want to talk about it, Mom. Please just drive.” Her mother could tell that something had happened. But she respected Carson’s wishes and drove home in silence.
On Monday morning, Carson didn’t know what to expect. She didn’t know where she stood with Jessa. She had to confess to Mai and Emma that she had been hanging out with the enemy. Everything was so messed up. Her mind didn’t know how to process it all. She didn’t know where to begin. She was an emotional wreck and getting more anxious by the minute.
“Hey, Carson! Wait up,” Emma said, joining her at their lockers.
“Hey,” Carson responded dryly.
“You okay? You didn’t say a lot in English class.”
“Yeah, sorry. I just had a long weekend. That’s all.”
“Okay, text me later if you can. These teachers are cracking down on our cell phones. So be careful.”
“Always,” she said to her friend, giving her a small grin. It was all she could muster.
Her next class was with Mai. She knew she would question her about the weekend. She didn’t want to talk about it. She didn’t know what to say. Just as she predicted, that was the first question Mai asked. It almost made Carson blow a fuse.
“What’s the big deal about the weekend? Why is everyone asking me that?”
Mai looked confused. “I was just asking. I guess it didn’t go well.”
“Ugh. Just stop talking to me, Mai. It’s all too much right now.”
Mai turned away from her friend, a little bit hurt and a whole lot confused. She knew that Carson would talk about it when she was ready. She definitely wasn’t going to push. This was a new Carson. She almost didn’t recognize her at all.
They sat at lunch in silence. Carson, Mai, and Emma picked at their food and tried not to address the obvious issue that was between them.
Finally, Emma broke the silence. “So, Mai, how was your weekend?”
Mai looked nervously from Emma to Carson and shook her head.
“It’s okay, Mai,” Carson told her. “I wanted to talk to y’all about it anyway. It’s killing me.”
“What?” they said in unison, moving in closer to their friend. Finally, she was going to put their suspicions to rest. She told them everything: the encounter in the restroom, Jessa coming over, Jody’s suspicions, finding Jessa snooping on her computer, the mall, the movies.
“Why did you trust her? Why didn’t you talk to me first?” Emma asked.
Just as Mai was about to chime in, Jessa rounded the corner. “Hey, Carson.” She took a seat right at their table. All of her friends stood around them. “So, did you ever call Holden like he asked you to?” She took a french fry from Carson’s plate and ate it.
“No.”
“Why? I know you wanted to. I see how you drool all over him.”
“That is not true,” Carson protested. “We are just friends.” She wasn’t even interested in boys in that way. He was just a cool kid. She enjoyed hanging out. Carson couldn’t understand what the big deal was.
“It’s no biggie anyways. I’m totally over him. I just wanted you to know that. Plus, I like hanging out with you more than him any day. So, whatever. Call me later.”
They watched as the lionesses walked away, sauntering through the cafeteria as if they owned it.
“Don’t trust her, Carson,” Emma said, still keeping her eyes on Jessa. “I heard that she was the one who got her crew to take your clothes in PE.”
“I don’t believe that. Why would she do that? You heard what she said. She likes hanging out with me.”
“And you believe her?” Mai asked. “No way. I’m with Emma. She is the only one mean enough to carry it out.”
“Y’all are just jealous because she wants to hang out with me and not you,” Carson spat at them. She had used her words to hurt them, and she hoped it worked. They were trying to hurt her, and she was angry. She pushed herself away from the table and quickly left the cafeteria. She could see Jessa as she flew past her. Jessa’s girls started laughing and looked back over at Emma and Mai.
“Poor Carson, she’s dancing with the devil,” Emma said, remembering the torture that those mean girls had put her through. It had been years ago, when she was just like Carson, trying to fit in. But it still stung.
“Yeah, but
some things you have to learn on your own,” Mai announced as they stood to leave for the second half of the day.
Chapter 8
A Familiar Face
Later that evening, Carson let her friends’ words sink into her spirit. It was all she could think about. After being around Jessa, she was sure the two of them were okay. There was something nagging her, though. Something about Jessa thinking that Carson was drooling all over Holden.
Why would she say that?
If that was the way Jessa saw it, then she was harboring negative feelings somewhere deep.
Carson fell back on her bed and turned the TV off. She couldn’t think about it anymore. The only person she knew who would be real with her was Jody. She walked across the street and knocked on Jody’s bedroom window.
She could see her friend engrossed in the Disney Channel’s newest show. Jody never took her eyes off the television as she crossed the room to raise the window for Carson. It was like they were little kids all over again.
“What’s up?” Jody asked her as she sat on the bed. “You only use the window now when something’s wrong.”
“That’s not true.” Jody gave her a knowing look and asked again, “What’s up?”
“I don’t even know where to begin. You know Jessa came over the other day, right?”
“Uh-huh.” Her expression read, “I told you so.” Jody sensed that Jessa would be the cause of her friend’s troubles.
“Well, number one, I went to the movies with her and her friends. First, Jessa leaves me looking all over the mall for them. Then when we get in the movie, I’m sandwiched between Harper and Monroe. They acted like I wasn’t even there.
After the movie, Holden’s outside. They see us talking and hear him tell me to call him. By the time I get to lunch today, Jessa is in my face saying that I like Holden. Says I can have him. I’m so emotional by this time that I wind up snapping at Mai and Emma. Now it’s like I have no friends.”
“One thing you will always have is a friend. I got you, so don’t ever worry about that.”
“I know, Jody. But you are not at Summit with me. I can’t be a one-girl show.”
The Most Beautiful Bully (Summit Middle School) Page 3