by Holly Renee
But I refused to give him all the power over me. I refused to let him hold my heart in his hands and trust that he wouldn’t crush it whenever he realized I wasn’t what he wanted.
“I think I’ve played the part perfectly.”
He looked at me like he barely knew me, and I hated it. I wanted to wrap my arms around his neck and beg him to forget everything I had said.
But Liam deserved better than that. He deserved more than I could give him.
He moved toward me, the smell of his cologne enough to make me want to reach out and touch him, but he wasn’t waiting for me. He gripped my chin in his hand and forced me to look up at him.
“If you want to pretend like that’s all this is, then let’s pretend.” His hand moved from my jaw to the back of my head. “One more night.” My hair tightened in his fingers, and even though I wished it hadn’t, a small moan fell from my lips. “Make me believe that I’m nothing to you.”
He let go of my hair, and I could barely catch my breath as he started unbuttoning his shirt. This was a bad idea. The worst idea we had yet, but I couldn’t say no.
I wanted him too badly. I wanted him to take away tonight and make me forget that this was all coming to an end. I wanted him to make me forget that we weren’t real even if that’s what he wanted me to prove.
He jerked his shirt from his shoulders as I bunched my dress around my hips. He was staring at me like he hated me, and I welcomed it. I could deal with him hating me. I could deal with the cold, impassive Liam I knew before we ever came to this godforsaken state.
I pulled my dress over my head and he unbuckled his belt. He was standing in front of me in only his dress pants and shoes, and he looked beautiful. He looked like he could have anyone he wanted, and I knew it was true. I knew that he had made me fall for him even though I didn’t want to.
This wasn’t who I was. I was the girl who could detach everything. Sex was sex and a business deal was a business deal, but somehow everything got completely mixed up.
“Get on your knees, Brooke.” His words were a command, and I fell to my knees as he closed the space between him. I didn’t let any men boss me around, but this didn’t feel like that. This felt like he wouldn’t survive if I didn’t do what he asked, and I found myself eager to please him.
He stood in front of me, and I quickly released the button on his pants before pulling down his zipper. He shifted his pants down his body, just enough for his cock to come free, and I looked up at him as I took it in my hand. He was staring down at me with a fire I had never felt before, and I didn’t dare look away as I ran my tongue over the length of him and buried him in my mouth.
His hands found their way back to my hair, and I moaned around him at the edge of pleasure and pain his hands brought. He wasn’t fucking around. He let me keep control as I took him in and out of my mouth as far as he could go, but he didn’t let me forget who truly held the power.
He ran one of his thumbs over my bottom lip before he slammed into my mouth. My eyes watered because I wasn’t prepared, but I didn’t dare stop him. His grip tightened in my hair as he started to really fuck my face, and I watched his features as the pleasure took over.
Last night had been about me, but this right here. This was for him, and I would give it to him. I would give it to him a hundred times over if it meant that I wouldn’t hurt him. If it meant that we could go back to us and not have a new awkwardness between us that would only remind me of what could have been.
If I wasn’t such a fool.
“I’m going to come,” he growled out as his hands tightened in my hair, but I refused to let him stop. I continued to move against him, against the pain from where his hands were attempting to pull me away, and I stared up at him just as he came against the back of my throat.
He came hard and his face was riddled with pain and pleasure, and I wondered if he could see the same look in my eyes. If he knew how much all of this was killing me.
He gripped me just below my breasts and pulled me up against him. I was barely on my toes as he held me, but I had no fear of falling. His hold was firm and unyielding, and I never wanted him to let me go.
He pressed his lips to mine, his kiss in complete contrast to the way he ravished my mouth only moments before, and I hated that him being this way with me could break me. Him being gentle and caring and kissing me like I might break would be the thing that did just that. It would be the thing that made me fall apart.
His lips moved from my lips to my jaw and down my neck and he kissed me as if he was trying to memorize every curve of my body. He kissed me as if he knew this would be the last time.
“Liam.” I couldn’t do this. I couldn’t have him be this way with me and still walk away.
“Don’t.” His lips were back on mine, and he backed me up against the wall as he kissed the fight out of me. Whatever chance I had of denying him was gone.
His hands wrapped around my thighs and he lifted me off the ground. I immediately wrapped my legs around his hips as my back pressed into the wall. He was pressed into me as if he feared I would try to escape, but I still wanted more.
I ground against him, my panties still in the way, and he groaned in my mouth.
“You drive me crazy.” He shoved my panties to the side, not even bothering with pulling them down my legs, and he pushed into me like he couldn’t take another second without it.
I held on to his shoulders and pressed my head against the wall. I watched him as he fucked me, the time for gentle kisses was gone. His grip on my thighs tightened as he slammed into me, and I felt like I was going to come out of my skin when he forced one of my legs toward the wall.
I was completely open to him and he knew it. He used his hands on my thighs to hold me in place as he looked down and watched what he was doing. My legs were shaking and the urge to close them was overwhelming, but he was having none of it. He pushed them wider, impossibly so, and I shocked at the way he moved against me.
Every time his body hit mine, a shockwave ran through my clit, and I knew I wouldn’t last. Liam was too good, at pleasing me, at confusing me, at making me want things I couldn’t have.
“Oh, God.” I clung to his shoulders and buried my face in his neck as my orgasm raked through my body.
I felt flooded by everything he was, everywhere he was touching me. It was too much. Too intense. My body fell apart and my emotions went with it.
I didn’t let go of him as he thrust into me until his body fell over the edge with me or as he walked us over to his bed. I didn’t let go as he laid down with me still attached to him or when he whispered my name.
I held on to him long into the night, and I didn’t let the first tear fall until the rhythm of his chest slowed and his arms loosened around me.
Seventeen
Idiot
Liam
I had no idea what I was doing.
How was I just supposed to go back home today and pretend like nothing had happened?
I wasn’t Brooke. I couldn’t just turn it on and off.
When I got up this morning, she was already packing her bag and she smiled at me like nothing had happened before. She smiled at me like she wasn’t fazed at all.
But I was. I was so fucked up inside that I didn’t know what to do.
I couldn’t stand that shitty smile on her face or the way she told me she’d be down after she took a shower like going back home was the best thing she could imagine.
“What’s wrong?” My mom was staring at me over her coffee cup, and regardless of how hard I tried to hide it, I knew I was doing a piss-poor job of it.
I shook my head and stared out the window. I couldn’t tell her. I couldn’t let her know that I brought Brooke here, the girl that she liked so much, just to trick her. I couldn’t tell her that I fell in love with her even though it wasn’t in the plans.
“I think I love Brooke.” I told her the only piece of honesty I could give her.
“I know.” She nodded and
took a sip of her coffee as if I just told her the simplest news ever.
But it wasn’t simple. Nothing about Brooke was.
I faced her fully. “How could you know if I just figured it out?”
“Son, I’ve known ever since you walked in the door with her.”
Moms were full of it. She only thought she knew everything, but she didn’t. She didn’t have a clue about me and Brooke.
“That’s not true.” I shook my head.
“Yes. It is.” She looked to the stairs as if she didn’t want Brooke to overhear what she had to say next. “I don’t know what you two have going on between you, but I know you haven’t figured it out. Brooke looks at you like you hung the moon and she has since the moment you dropped her off in my kitchen to make biscuits.”
I couldn’t take it anymore. I couldn’t keep lying to her.
“She was faking.”
My mom shook her head, but she didn’t understand.
“I’m not lying to you, Mom, she was faking this entire time. I brought her here to lie to you.”
She took another sip of her coffee and stared at me as only a mama could. “Katie told me.”
What? I couldn’t believe her. After everything she’s done, did she actually believe that telling my mom about me and Brooke was going to change anything? Did it actually change anything?
“It doesn’t matter though. Whatever reason you brought that girl here, the outcome is the same. She loves you. I would much rather that be real than some two-month relationship you tried to appease me with.”
“I’m sorry, Mom. I shouldn’t have brought her here.” I hated those words. I would never take back the decision that brought us to today. “It was wrong to lie to you, but you’re wrong about her.”
“I’m sorry I made you feel the need to lie. I shouldn’t have put that kind of pressure on you, and I’m sorry I called you an idiot.”
“You didn’t.” I shook my head.
“Oh, I did.” She smirked. “I just said it to your dad. He thinks you’re being one too.”
I didn’t know what to say to that.
“Don’t look so shocked.” She pointed at the ceiling. “That girl’s in love with you and you’re just going to sit here and act like it’s not even happening.”
“She doesn’t want this.”
“Then make her want it.” She rolled her eyes as if I was being completely clueless.
“Okay. I think that’s everything.” Brooke was climbing down the stairs, and she still had that damn smile on her face. But her eyes told a different story. She looked like she was as thrilled to be going back home as I was.
“Oh.” My mom rose from her chair and pulled Brooke into her arms. I winced because I didn’t know what she was going to say. I didn’t know if I wanted Brooke to find out that she knew the truth. Part of me would be relieved if she did, but the other part of me didn’t want to give her any reason to back out of our deal.
As of right now, I still owed her, and I wanted to make sure I didn’t give her any reason to back out. I didn’t want to give her any reason to run away from me.
“I wish you didn’t have to go.”
“Me too.” My mom and Brooke were hugging each other so tightly that I wasn’t sure how they were breathing. I was pretty sure that the two of them would miss each other far more than either would miss me.
“You all off already?” My dad came in from the back yard and wiped some grease off his hands. There was no telling what he had already been doing this morning.
“We are. Brooke has to be back at work tomorrow.” Which she needed to quit. The building was ours, and I couldn’t wait until she told that place where to shove it.
My mom and Brooke were saying something to one another that only the two of them could hear before they let each other go. My mom tucked some hair behind Brooke’s ear and smiled at her. “We’ll be up for a visit soon, but don’t forget to text me.”
“I won’t.” Brooke smiled sadly at her, and I hated that our deal did this to her. I didn’t mean for her to come here and fall for my mama or my mama fall for her.
But I would do anything to give this to her. I would share my mama and this old house and anything else she wanted. All she had to do was say the word.
I grabbed her luggage and rolled it to the door. My dad clapped me on the back before pulling me into a hug. “Don’t be a stranger.”
“I won’t.” I moved to my mom as my dad hugged Brooke.
“And don’t be an idiot.” My mom’s voice was soft but stern as I hugged her tiny body.
They were the only words I could think about as we walked out of the door and got in the car, and they were the only thing I could think about as Brooke smiled at me before looking out the window.
I had been an idiot about this whole damn thing, and I didn’t know what to do to make it right.
Eighteen
Home
Brooke
We had been home for two days, and they had been two of the suckiest days of my life.
Not only had I not slept well since I had gotten used to sleeping with Liam all week, but work had been kicking my ass. Apparently taking a week off was one of the worst decisions I ever had, and I was currently making up for it.
I just kept repeating over and over in my head that things would be different soon. Liam told me that they had accepted his offer, but we hadn’t discussed many details after that. I had been too busy working out the details of his body to be worried about our future.
The only positive was that I was going to see Kennedy within the next ten minutes, and I couldn’t freaking wait. Of course, she wanted to have dinner at Tucker and Liam’s restaurant, Rock Bottom, but it wasn’t like I could tell her no.
I always loved going there before, and I should have had no reason not to go there now. But I did.
I hadn’t seen Liam since he helped me carry my luggage into my apartment. I knew he was probably just as busy as I was, probably much more so, but I would be lying if I said it didn’t hurt.
I pushed him away and I had no right, but I still wanted him. I wanted him to tell me I was an idiot and that I was making a stupid decision. But he was smarter than that.
I walked into Rock Bottom and immediately saw Kennedy sitting at the bar. I walked up behind her, wrapping my arms around her, and she squealed as she looked over at her shoulder at me.
“Never leave me again.” She was so serious as she said it, but I couldn’t help but laugh.
“Never.”
I climbed onto the barstool next to her, and I waved at Chloe who was serving someone at the other end of the bar.
“I’m so freaking glad you’re home.” She took a sip of the soda that sat in front of her. “I need all the details.”
A bartender I didn’t recognize stood in front of me, and I quickly ordered a vodka soda.
“There aren’t really any details.” I looked around the restaurant, but I didn’t see Liam or Tucker.
“Says the vodka soda.” She was staring at me like she was dying for me to spill the tea.
I rolled my eyes at her. “It’s been a long day.”
“Sure.” She took another drink. “Tucker said Liam’s been extra moody since you all have been home.”
“What’s that got to do with me?” He hadn’t been extra moody when I left him. Sure, we had barely spoken the entire car ride home, but things were weird.
“Oh. I don’t know. You two have had so much sexual tension that it makes everyone around you a little hot and you’ve just spent a week alone together in fake love.”
“Whatever.” I took a long sip of my drink just as Chloe made her way over to us.
“Couldn’t you have at least gave Liam a blowy while you all were gone? He’s already getting on my damn nerves.”
I almost spit out my drink. “Really, Chloe?”
“Oh my God. You did?” She stopped wiping down the bar and looked at me with pure delight on her face.
“No. I di
dn’t.” I answered quickly. Too quickly. It even sounded like a lie to me.
“You’re lying.” Kennedy pointed at me, and she looked as tickled as Chloe. “I can always tell when you’re lying.”
I didn’t want to lie to her again, but I also didn’t want either of them to make a big deal out of it. Because it wasn’t a big deal. What happened, happened and that was the end of it. We didn’t need to hash out all the naughty details.
Or any of the other details for that mattered.
“It isn’t important.” I tried to wave them off, but they weren’t having any of it.
“Isn’t important?” Kennedy looked at Chloe before looking at me. “You always give me the deets and now that it’s with Liam fucking Gentry, you’re going to hold out on me?”
“Will you please keep your voice down?” I looked behind us, but there still wasn’t a sign of him.
“He’s here.” Chloe nodded toward the back of the restaurant. “In his office, if you want me to get him.”
“No.” I put my hand on top of hers to stop her.
She and Kennedy both looked up at me.
“Oh shit. You caught feelings.” Chloe said it like it was the worst possible outcome.
“No. That’s not it.” I shook my head, but we all three knew I was lying.
They always knew when I was lying.
“Why didn’t you tell me?” Kennedy was serious now, but this wasn’t happening. Not here. Not now. Not where Liam could walk out at any moment.
“Can we not do this here?” I looked around the beautiful bar. “We’ll talk about it later.”
As soon as the words left my mouth, Liam stormed through the door to the bar and he looked pissed. He had a clipboard in his hand and the couple bartenders behind the bar gave him a wide berth as he opened one of the bottom cabinets and started rummaging through it.